Chapter 7: Bruises on Her Heart

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It was autumn, and the days seemed to drag on and on. I felt as if seasons had passed since Jack had given me the music box, yet it was merely three days. I hardly had seen him since then, for I had to cut my shifts shorter at the bar in order to double my efforts at the vineyard. And even then we hardly had the time to talk. Fall was also the season of drinking, and therefore the bar was loud and crowded each night. Swaying, drunken men called my name left and right, demanding another drink even though they had already reached their limit. By the end of each day I was exhausted, and I would fall asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow, no matter if I had changed from my filthy clothes or not.

So far, today had been no different. I could feel the hot sun baking my skin, which was covered in a thin layer of dust. I was sure I looked terrible, but I knew I couldn't pause from pulling the small grapes off the vines. It was our only source of income. My father had stopped to drink on an empty barrel, his cheeks red and glistening with sweat. I knew he hadn't worked half as hard as Kai and I had, yet I knew I couldn't accuse him of it, for he would just make us work twice as hard.

Sweat was pouring down Kai's face as well. He had long since taken his bandana off and was using it as a cloth to dab his face with. His tanned face was indifferent yet hardset, and he worked rigorously without complaining. We were always grateful for Kai's work during the fall, I couldn't imagine how much longer it would have taken without him. He had come from a lifestyle where he was used to working constantly for scraps of food each day, and so when we hired him about ten years ago he was more than capable. Secretly, I wished I could handle the workload like he could. My mind was always full of constant complaints and criticisms, and I was filled with anger towards my lazy father and moping mother.

Yet I finished my work all the same. Each fall I would pick hundreds if not thousands of small, purple grapes... each year hoping they would produce the taste my grandma was so successful for. But they never tasted any differently, ever since the year she had died.

It had only been three days into the season and I was already worn from the heavy labor. My deep new way of thinking converted back to shallow and exhausted. I didn't want to find the good in the situation, and I didn't want to hold my tongue every time my father screamed at me from where he sat resting. Yet I didn't give in completely. Merely seeing Jack once a day and saying a quick "hello" reminded me of the promise I had made to myself as well as him.

And today I needed to be reminded of that promise more than ever. Just then I heard my father yell out at me, swearing and complaining because of the few grapes I had just absent-mindedly stepped on. I clenched my teeth and tried to block out his voice, fumbling with the vine in front of me. I heard my mother sigh from behind me. Kai was keeping to his work, also pretending not to hear my drunken father's profanity. Yet after a few moments the yelling stopped, and I heard my father rise from the barrel.

"LISTEN TO ME, YOU STUPID GIRL!" he called out, advancing upon where I stood. I kept tugging at the grapes, my grip increasing as I tried to keep my mouth from firing an indignant retort. "KAREN!" he screamed, his voice lowering into a deep growl. I squeezed the grapes so hard they burst. I felt the cool juice seeping onto my hands.

Just then I felt my body forcefully turned around. My father was a deep shade of red, sweat was dripping down his cheeks and neck, and his eyes were squinted in half-rage and half-intoxication. I stared him full in the face, still not uttering a sound.

And then he hit me. It took me completely off guard; my father had yelled, he had kicked our furniture, and he had thrown and broken several jars of wine— but he had never once before struck me. I heard a slight shriek issue from my mother, and I felt my father slap me again. I was too shaken to defend myself. I let my knees bend and finally collapse onto the ground, tears flowing from my eyes. My cheeks stung and my head was filled with pain. He lashed at me again and again— until suddenly he stopped, held back by an interfering Kai. I lay on the ground, helpless and sobbing.

I couldn't remember most of what happened next. I heard Kai yelling now, the first time I had ever heard his voice rise in anger, and I heard my father swearing and fighting back. My mother had come over to me, bent over my side, holding me in vain. My vision focused and unfocused, and I put a hand to my raw cheeks. I had endured physical pain before— to a worse degree than this— but the source of it made it the worst pain I had ever felt in my life. My whole body burnt and shook in a feverish state. I heard my father go down in the background, passed out from either the alcohol or a blow to the head. Then I saw Kai make his way to me, bruised and bleeding, his face etched with a look of disgust and hatred. His features turned sympathetic as he bent down at my side.

"Karen..." he said, and it sounded distant. "I'm sorry, Karen. I'm so sorry..." My mother backed away and I felt Kai's strong arms lift me from the ground and into his grasp. I threw my arms around his neck and buried my face in his chest. I couldn't fully comprehend what had happened yet. I didn't want to. I felt like a child, limp and feeble.

He brought me into the house and placed me upon his bed, for mine was upstairs. My mother brought in a cool cloth and started soaking my forehead and cheeks, wiping the tears from my eyes. At that point I realized that I never wanted to see my father again. I hated him. I could never forgive him for what he had done. My mind was reeling with a thousands thoughts, most making no sense at all, and they became blurry until I felt my eyes grow heavy and close.

I awoke a few hours later, my eyes swollen and my head throbbing in pain. I sat up and realized I was still in Kai's room. My mother was sitting in the corner, and she looked up when she realized I had awoken. "Karen, your father..." she began. I knew what she was going to say. She was just going to make an excuse for him, and I didn't want to hear it.

"Don't even speak of him," I said quickly and angrily, the whole reality of what had happened coming to me. "I never want to see nor speak of him again."

"Karen..." she said wearily, knowing she could not persuade me. How could she even side with him? I got up from the messy bed. I didn't want to stay in the house. I couldn't as long as my father was there— unconscious or not. "Karen, where are you going?" I heard my mother utter before I closed the door.

I saw Kai working in the fields again, and I hurried past so he wouldn't see me and confront me. I didn't want to speak to anyone at the time being. I just wanted to escape.

I quickly walked toward the beach, hoping I wouldn't meet anyone on the way. Luckily it was Thursday and no one was at the ranch when I passed. Yet when I arrived I wasn't surprised to see a peaceful and pleasant Jack standing at the edge of the dock, fishing. I was unsure of whether I should turn and leave, of whether to tell him of my current situation or not, or if I should save it for another day. But before I could come to a conclusion he had turned around and was already waving me over. I approached him, cautiously and painfully, wishing to spill everything out at once, but not wanting to confuse him.

"Karen?" he said inquisitively, noting my ragged hair and puffy eyelids, "Karen... what happened? Is everything all right?"

His concern had opened the floodgate, and I broke down again. Everything came out in a rushed slur of words, yet Jack's horrified expression told me he comprehended every word I spoke. I told him about everything— of my attempt to hold my tongue to my mother's attempted apology— everything except of Kai and his interference. I couldn't find myself telling Jack about it, especially of him carrying me back into the house.

Jack's normally friendly disposition had melted away into a countenance of anger and loathing. "If I had been there, Karen..." he said, his fists clenched, "I swear, I would have... I wouldn't have let him lay a finger on you...I just can't believe..." I was still crying, and I felt Jack's arms close around me. "Karen," he said, slightly calmer now, "if he ever comes near you again, or even threatens you in any way, just run to my farm... even if I'm not there you can stay for as long as you'd like."

His words were the only redemption of the day. "Thank you..." I mumbled, burying my face into his chest as I had Kai's. I felt protected and safe, and I remained in his arms until I had cried myself dry. He offered me a place in his farm for the night, but I reluctantly declined, for I knew I would eventually have to go home and face the music.


AN: Cue typical one-liner ending. Hah, gotcha!