16: He wants to remember.
(VP: Lost Neji) I was following this girl, my wife, best friend and partner how she had described it. In my mind, I remember her face, spending time with her talking with her though I don't know what about but whatever it was it made her happy and me. I know that I needed my mind back.
In all honesty, I was scared. This girl had practically made my mind, she could alter things to her liking but for some reason I knew she wouldn't do that, I think the reason that my mind is missing pieces is because she couldn't have those. Anyone who would be creating and altering someone's mind to fit their doings would leave holes in it would be a dead give away, her face when she heard I didn't know her or myself hurt me.
I didn't know her, yet I felt I did.
Then there was that girl who was so surprised that I had lost my mind. She talked as though I had known her my whole life, I don't think that was possible to trick someone that far. It had to be my real past.
I was happy to love her, she was everything I liked in people all together and more. She was smart, helpful, kind, caring, understanding, beautiful and loving. She was perfect and I would wait for my memory back so I could make her happy.
We arrived at a room and she knocked. "Where are we going?"
"To see your uncle, your clan head." She whispered and walked in the now open door.
"Tenten, and Neji, wow I'm surprised to see you, how are you. I'm surprised you lived."
"Uncle?" I asked stupidly.
"He's incomplete?" He asked.
"No, not really, he's just forgotten, he'll remember soon, I know it." Her hope made we want to remember.
"Very good, thank you. So what does he remember?" He asked.
"Nothing I can tell, faces flash in his mind but he can't do much other than that. No telling when his mind will piece itself together or even if it will." Her doubt and her sadness made we want to remember because I didn't want to make this wonderful girl sad.
"I remember your face." I said looking at him. "I looked at your for guidance, teaching and as family." He said. "I remember that." Tenten smiled at me and nodded for me to be proud of what I could remember. To make her smile was another reason to try to remember.
"That's good that you have begun to remember and recognize things, Neji. I'm glad, I'm so happy that you are not dead and you have returned. I hope to see you remembering more as each day goes by." I nodded and walked out. "You should take him to his room."
"Hai,"
"I'd rather not." I said plainly.
"Why not?" She asked.
"Because I don't know any of these people they don't look familiar, I only remember 6 people with those eyes. You, the girl from earlier, someone who looks like the girl from earlier, someone who looks like me, someone who looks like him and some weird guy in a coat who had blood covering him." She gasped and was crying. I held her.
"Who is it Tenten?"
"The man who activated the seal, which proves he was Hyuuga. I didn't put that memory in, I was sure of it, he must have already had it, and embroidered in his mind." She said.
"Alright, so what do you want to do Neji?"
"I only trust her and you and that one girl for now. I'd rather not leave her." I said looking at her, Tenten.
"Neji, you can't, that's impossible." She said taking a step back.
"On normal times it wouldn't even be considered but you two disappear for hours all the time, and since he seems to only trust you, it's allowed." He said handing me a pass.
"Thank you, uncle." I said bowing.
"He's unconsciously the same, isn't he?" Tenten smiled and nodded.
"He is." She said as she escorted me to some garden.
"Where is this place I asked?"
"It's the Hyuuga Complex Gardens, you said that a lot of the time when you were growing up and training you would come here, I though it might help your recovery and recognition, some." She said smiling. I concentrated.
"I see you and me sitting her, it seems in the close past and we're laughing hysterically about something it looks like, and then uncle comes and is confused as to what we're doing, you say something and we laugh again."
"I remember that, it was about 2 months ago though, before the accident, the day before it actually." She said.
"At least you have the short term memory, that's a start." She said happily.
"I'm glad too, so what were we doing on that day back then, when I was attacked?" He asked.
"We were going for me to take that exam, the Kunoichi Exam."
"What's that about?" I asked.
"It's an exam female ninja take and if you pass and are married then you're qualified to go on any equal level mission with your husband without a second thought , it's a test on all levels of being a ninja and caring for others."
"How'd you do?" He asked.
"I didn't go, I was taking care of you." She said staring at her hands, she does that a lot when she's sad.
"Sorry," I said.
"No, it's not you're fault. It's my job as even an in-training kunoichi to take care of my husband, which is you. That comes first, I would have failed it for sure if I left you in a hospital to take it. Never leave a ninja behind, it's a rule."
"You're amazing you know that. I remember some of our training sessions, they were always amazing performances from both of us." She smiled and nodded. Another reason to remember, to do what I use to.
"Thanks, I'm glad that you still thing I'm good for you even when you're unconscious of everything I've done for you." I brought her close to me.
"You're the most amazing person I've ever met, I know that people aren't like you are, for some reason things like general population stick in my mind. I know that most aren't like you, beautiful, kind, caring, generous, compassionate, loving, helpful and loyal. You don't find those a lot, and I know that. Everyone does. You're so beautiful you know that?" She kissed me.
"Yeah, you've said that before, but in fewer words. You were never one to say much but I could read you like a book, perfect to word for word things. I didn't need Byakugan to read you, you used on me a few times."
"Byakugan?" I asked.
"It's a kekkei genkai, a clan ability that only you and your clan have. If you do hand seals and focus chakra in your eyes you can see 350 degrees around you in all directions and up to a certain radius too. It's the most amazing things."
"Wow that seems amazing." I remember hand signs but I don't remember how to move chakra but I'll try. I did the pictures that were in my mind then I focused all my energy into my eyes and opened them. "Byakugan," I said and I saw a whole new world, it was amazing. "This is amazing and so cool."
"That's what I said when I saw it through your eyes."
"How?" I asked.
"We traded bodies for a while so we could feel the other's pain and understand them better."
"That's smart; I wonder what it are like to be you. I don't think I'll find that picture in my mind."
"Probably not, I only could recover 30 percent of your memories your memories are mostly mine of you so that you could return to normal. But I'm surprised that you remember so much for someone having amnesia."
"I think my brain's slowly putting everything together."
"I'm happy, so where do you want to go now?" She asked.
"I'm hungry, can we eat?" I asked.
"Sure, I know where we're going to eat." She brought me to a house and went in and after a few minutes came out with a picnic basket. I followed along side of her into the forest.
"I remember this place, it's where we trained." I said staring at my surroundings.
"That's great that you remember. It's peaceful and quiet here so that's why we train to…"
"Escape these two annoying people, twins I think." She was laughing hysterically.
"Lee is our teammate, the younger one and Sensei-Gai is our sensei and Lee just dresses like him. They're annoying for sure but how did you know?" I asked.
"There was this look on your face that said to me 'leave me alone' and mine read 'stop wasting my time'." She started laughing again. At least I was entertaining her, maybe this would be okay until I could fully remember.
"Neji, Tenten, there you are!" A loud blonde kid yelled.
"Morning Naruto, Neji this is your friend Naruto."
"Naruto, I remember you. We were in this huge stadium and we were fighting to the looks of it, it looked like a hundred of you versus me." I said.
"Why is he talking funny?" Naruto asked Tenten.
"He has amnesia Naruto, and be polite." She said sighing.
"Oh sorry, so how'd?" She smacked her hand over his mouth and pushed him away.
"Bye Naruto, nice talking with you. Don't bother us again." She said and sat down.
"Sorry, that was Naruto, Konoha's Number One Hyperactive Ninja." I smile.
"I know, I remember." He said.
I look at her and I sense that she is feeling a bit lonely and tired for some reason. "How much?" I asked.
"How much what?" She asked.
"How much did you have to suffer to take care of me?" I asked.
She yawned. "I'm fine, I really am. I have just been tired lately."
"You're lying to me." I said crossing my arms and staring at her.
"You're the same you whether you know it or not. You care too much at times, and too little but you can't see the fine line." She said. "I thought you were hungry, you should eat?" She says but she walks up to grab the picnic basket but she collapses into my arms for I knew this was coming. This wasn't good.
I am now in the middle of this forest and it seems that I have no recollection of how to get back in my memory and my guide, and wife has fallen asleep and I need to take her home but of course, she can't tell me where she lives because she's asleep.
I pick up her fragile body and like I remember doing. I can't believe I remember these find details. I guess for her it's important. I need to remember so that I can care fore her, protect her, help her, train with her, and most importantly love her.
I walked into the village and ran into someone. "Hello Neji, I'm happy to see you're out of the hospital."
"Thanks, where does Tenten live?" The girl walks off.
"Silly you take her home everyday when she falls asleep from you exhausting her during practice, what happened to your brain?" Its gone stupid girl, I don't think I know you anyway. I sighed and sat leaning against the tree with Tenten in my lap.
"Neji, I'm so very glad I found you. The power of youth has returned you from the hospital like me. Therefore, what will we do now, train? And why are our teammate and your fiancée asleep on your lap?"
"You're Lee right?" I asked.
"But of course, are you doing alright Neji."
"I guess but I have amnesia and Tenten's been guiding me everywhere but now she's asleep and I can't find her place. Can you help me?" I asked. I needed to remember so I wouldn't have to ask for help, be cared for again, have her worry, cause her to have to take care of me, her to lose sleep, her to suffer, to be lost, and finally to be of use again.
"But of course Neji, you go down this street and there is a huge mansion, she lives there. You'll have to find her room by yourself, I've never been in past her living room. I'm sure you have dropped her off in her room before, I'm sure you'll find it."
"Thanks Lee, maybe we'll train eventually, when I remember how to."
"You forgot how to train?" He asked.
"Yeah for now, I'm working on that so I can train with Tenten again. She seems to miss it and it upsets me seeing her sad." He smiled.
"Youth within you is so wonderful, bye Neji, bye Tenten, good-night." I sighed, that's right, it's late and I'm staying with her because I don't know anyone else.
I reached her house and found her room, I didn't find any guest rooms so I laid her down in her bed, covered her up and slept on the couch and hoped during this night I would remember for I suffered without a memory. I was tired of suffering.
I heard a sound of someone crying, I was hoping it wasn't Tenten. I really didn't want her to be sad on my account but I knew she was and there was no helping it. I walked back to her and sat on her bed and pulled her toward my body and she rested her body against mine and she stopped crying.
"Neji?" She asked.
"It's alright, you're fine." I told her.
"But I feel as though when you were gone and I was gone too." She said.
"I wish I could say I'm back but that would be lying. I'm alive and not in danger and you're alive and here too so don't think about it. I'm sure I'll get my memory back. Did you sleep while I wasn't there?" I asked.
"Not much," She said honestly. "I had nightmares and worries that kept me up. I couldn't because it scared me to think about it. I don't want that." She begins to let tears fall across her face. Another reason my memory had to come back, so she wouldn't cry, worry or fear.
I let myself relax more to her touch. I knew that I wasn't officially married to her yet but I soon would be. It wasn't as if I was some weirdo she didn't know, in a way I was but she trusted me so I trusted myself to do the right thing. I pulled her small fragile body close to me and leaned back in the bed and let her rest her upper body on mine. I could feel her body relax as I held her and my muscles too had begun to relax in her presence.
I couldn't dream, my mind was still recovering in heal which meant when I slept it was just a very light stage, anything could wake me up and I couldn't dream because my mind couldn't create free images on demand, it could barely handle reality. Who knows what would happen if I did dream.
I could feel her breathing get perfectly steady, she was asleep and relaxed, happy and I was glad. I think that because I was ignorant of how I was supposed to behave within all the rules I would have hurt her more. This was the only thing I found to be good about not having my mind; this wasn't a cause for me wanting it back. It was a reason why I didn't. This meant I was ignorant of the rules and I was adept of them so I could protect her where my old self could not.
I awoke and she was still sleeping, I recognized a lot of the people in the pictures in her room, and I remember this room, taking her to her room every night after practices when she had fallen asleep.
I didn't know these people's names because that wasn't the part of the brain I had back. I looked around Tenten's room and I saw a book on the floor next to the bed and I picked it up.
There were a lot of notes in the book in Tenten's writing but there was one that was of extreme importance. It read:
The brain consists of four main lobes: frontal, occipital, pariental, and temporal lobes. Now though not much has gone into this study it seems the purposes of each lobe is below:
Frontal: impulse control, judgment, language, memory and movement Occipital: Sight Pariental: Senses. Temporal: memory and recognition.It was complex to figure out when I found out about the seal which they were targeting, I figured that it was definitely occipital to shut down the Byakugan so I made sure the jutsu would protect that portion of the brain I couldn't figure out what else they would target. But by some extremely complicated calculations after the event I realized this went through the temporal lobe to the occipital lobe but I saved apparently the occipital lobe which is why he can still see but I only saved 30 of his temporal lobe which means that his memory and recognition is slow and slightly unrecognizable. He may never get his mind back because of my stupid mistake, it they were going to just take out the eyes then they'd put the seal in the back but they didn't, they wanted all the secrets as in memory of a village and abilities too. Stupid Hyuuga, you do more damage then you thought. He might recover but his memory and recognition are low but I increased his ability to multiply his brains cells from the remaining living temporal cells and the ones that I had. My final discovery is I saved 90 percent of his brain. More good news is that the temporal lobe isn't the main focus of memory use, it's the frontal lobe which is completely unharmed which means there is a large chance that he'll remember voices, names, events and things of the past but he won't match them up with pictures from his occipital lobe but I can help him do that. He should be fine, I'm sure. It just may be a while.Dissociative amnesia is what it's called, it's the inability to recognize and relate to other parts of one's brain. In this type is commonly confused with global amnesia because it seems they have forgotten it all but they just can't recognize who the people are if they concentrate, they can see the person, remember a name but not match the two up.
She had done all that work in order to help me; she must have lost so much sleep. I'm going to let her sleep for a long time. Therefore, the only problem is that I can't match faces with people. Other than that, I should know these things, which is amazing. I'm sure that if I tried and focused enough, I could remember all the jutsus and techniques that I used during training.
I owe you so much, because you said so, I know my memory come back and I need it to come back to prove your intelligence and ability to do anything. For your hope and mine, I need my memory back.
She slept quietly through everything that was going on and I smiled as I remembered that I wasn't gone I was all there, and I could move on with my life, I would let her help my connect these pictures in my mind with my thoughts of things. It would take time but I'm sure that this would happen. She'd get what she wants and so would I, eventually.
After she had successfully slept 36 and gained her strength I had pieced together a lot of my techniques and I remembered the hand signs but I couldn't remember how to do the hand signs but I'd have her help.
"Morning," I said as she began to gain consciousness.
"Neji?" She asked. She was about to jump but I had her tightly secured in my arms.
"You forgot huh?" I said.
She sighed and nodded. "Sorry, it's new but it's definitely relaxing and the best sleep I've gotten in a long time, since we use to sleep under the stars after practice and you'd take me home. I always slept good then too. What time is it?"
"36 hours later," She sighed.
"Thanks for letting me sleep, you sleep well?" She asked.
"Lightly but calm and gently. It's quite comfortable here with you." She smiled and blushed and lay back down. "I didn't mean for you to go back to sleep I haven't eaten since lunch two days ago." She sighed and got up and was about to undress.
"Tenten stop," I said, my mind registering what she was about to do.
"What?" She asked turning around.
"I don't think you want to undress in front of me." She smacked her head.
"Sorry, forgot, force of habit, I'll be down soon." She waited for me to leave and then she would change as I waited for her to come down.
The Reasons Why… He Needs to Remember.
He was left to follow this girl, his wife, best friend and partner. He remembered her face but just barely. He was scared. She could alter his mind to her likings. It hurt him to not know anything. He didn't know her, yet he felt he did. She wanted to remember her for she was everything he liked in people. He didn't want to wait for it back. He wanted her to make her happy. People were surprised he lived. her hope her doubt her sadness her smile to do what he use to do to care for her protect her help her train with her tired of being cared for tired of having her worry tired of having her lose sleep on his case tired of having her suffer tired of being lost wanting to be useful again tired of suffering tired of worrying wanted to dream wanted to sleep (good thing) he was free from the rules and he could be with her to protect her he had dissociative amnesia he'd remember eventually, wanted to soon