Metal Pointe Ch8
A/n: So, we're back;) And, I say with the deepest love in my heart that if I could up and move to Georgia to be forever by Bnjwl's side, I would in a heartbeat!
Now, we're back to the madness of Edward's life…I know a lot of you were asking about the time references in the past few chapters…remember, he's not always accurate. He's a drug addict. So, keep that in mind. I will tell you that this is AFTER Bella has had the baby…almost two years have gone by since they last saw each other.
This was one of the first chapters that I wrote when I got bit by this plot bunny, so it's an important one…pivotal to what this has all been leading up to.
Thank you ALL SO MUCH for your reviews, alerts and favorites. I am epic fail at review replies but, I want you all to know that I read and cherish every single one of them, as does Bnjwl. I will try better but right RL is pulling most of my free time away. So it's either write or reply.
Thank you SO MUCH to our new beta, A Jasper For Me! She has done an amazing job stepping in and filling the big shoes that EdwardsEternal filled for us previously! And, our team of pre-readers, Mamadog93, Ttharman and Lvtwilight09 are fabulous and have been with us since the beginning! LOVE to you ALL:)
Now, don't forget that there is an outtake from both of us for Metal Pointe in the Fandom4children compilation. So, donate now, time is almost out. Blogspot (dot) Fandom4Children (dot) com
See ya at the bottom.
EPOV
I sit here and listen to the noise around me ... and I have no idea where in this world the one person that matters the most is.
I haven't seen Bella in over a year ... and I ache for her.
Especially today ... I hurt.
It's her birthday. I've never missed her birthday before, yet here I sit in this dingy rehab center wishing I were anywhere but here. I can't call her; I don't know where she is, and if she were home, Renee would never let me speak to her. Not after the way we both behaved last time we were together.
I sigh and run my hand through my haggard hair as I look around the room. What I wouldn't give for just one hit of the needle ... to zone out and forget all this shit that's rambling in my head. I could concentrate on her
face ... her voice ...her smell … her body under mine.
Fuck.
I want to go to my room, but I'm being forced to 'socialize' with the other residents. I don't know why ... I mean really ... none of them give a shit about me. I'm just a would-be rock star they've seen on TV a few times. They each got close enough to gauge what they can get from me and then slink off when they see I have nothing to give. As if any of them were worth my time either...unless they had some smack for me. Then we could be good friends, but only then.
I noticed the plain girl, with glasses and long dark hair that reminded me of Bella's as she walked over to me, "Hi Edward, can I sit with you?" Her voice was timid and quiet, so I just nodded my response. "You wanna talk about it?" She hesitantly asked.
Do I? Do I want to talk with this complete stranger about Bella and the ache I felt for her? No, not really, but when the fuck does what I want really matter?
"Not really." I answered and twirled a cigarette around in my hand. My breath left my body in a large gust as I realized how happy my fucking counselor would be if he found out I talked about my shit. And I do have to say out of all the loonies here in the looney bin, she looks the least looney. So I give it up for her. "But I guess I should." As I said the words, I felt all the hurt that rested on me cause my shoulders to sag, which caused me to slump further back into the couch I sat on.
"Are you having withdrawls?" she asked as she leaned towards me slightly and her eyes met mine. So much for privacy in these types of places. It doesn't matter how much money you throw at them, they still spill your details as soon as they possibly fucking can.
I looked at her for a minute ... her eyes were filled with loneliness and pain as she looked away. Her shyness took over quickly and once again she shrunk away from me. Her scared demeanor told me she was here because she cared and not because she wanted something from me. So I spilled.
"I miss my best friend." I pulled the lighter out of my pocket and flicked it a couple of times. Angela looked from my hand to the flame and back again. I guess it bothered her how close they were to one another but to me it was of no importance.
"Oh." She said as she nervously wrung her hands together over and over in her lap.
"I'm sorry, I forgot your name." I apologized. I respected her enough to ask since she had enough respect for me to ask if she could sit down in the first place.
"Angela ... Angie," she kept her eyes down and her voice low, a little embarrassed, it seemed.
I continued on for her. Suddenly I wanted to put her at ease and make her comfortable while she talked with me. "I'm not really having withdrawals from the smack, I can stop that whenever I want to. But I am having serious withdrawals from my Bella." I flicked the lighter again and brought the cigarette around to my mouth. I knew we weren't allowed to smoke in here, but that didn't stop me from lighting it up anyway.
Angela's eyes widened at my bold move. "Do you want to go outside to the patio so you can smoke that?" Angela asked as she looked towards the door.
"Sure." I was a little agitated from being inside all day anyway.
We walked out onto the little patio and sat in a couple of lounge chairs as I lit my cigarette again. I inhaled a deep puff and let it settle in my chest. It felt good but it didn't help the tightness I already felt.
I let out my breath as Angela spoke again, "So, where is your best friend?"
My hand involuntarily ran through my hair again and sighed, "I don't know. I haven't seen her in over a year." I answered honestly, even though I knew it would only invite Angela to ask more questions.
"Oh. Why not?" She asked quickly.
I shook my head, "It's a long story."
"Was she your girlfriend?" Her mouth seemed to speak faster than her mind could process what she did or asked if the look on her face was any clue.
I shrugged my shoulders, "I've been in love with her since we were four years old, but no, she wasn't my girlfriend."
Bella and I had never given each other labels ... we just ... were. It was always the two of us against everyone else. In our little bubble, we were content, at peace and happy just to have the other person there.
How the fuck did we get so torn apart? Was she as miserable without me as I was without her? Did she think about me every single fucking day like I thought of her?
"Fuck." I said with a long exhaled breath and stood up so I could pace back and forth across the patio. Maybe it would help me work off some of the pent up anger and sadness I felt inside.
"Are you alright?" Angela asked, concerned by my outburst.
"No, I'm not alright." I snapped at her. She shrunk back into herself a little, and I sighed again and sat down.
"Fuck, I'm sorry, okay? It's just ... I really need to talk to Bella, and I won't be okay until I do. I have no idea where she is or if she even wants to talk to me. But ... I just need to hear her voice." I let my voice drop and my head roll back onto the top of the chair as I closed my eyes and held back tears.
"Does your chest hurt?" Her soft voice pulled me from my memories.
"What?" I asked, completely confused.
"You just ... your hands, they rub a constant rhythm on your chest over your heart. So I wondered if you had some chest pain." She said as I looked down to see my hands were in fact moving across my chest in a soothing manner.
When the fuck did that start?
"It's okay if you miss her, you know?" Angela said. "I miss Ben, too…but, I know where he is." Her voice fell off and utter sadness washed over her face.
"Where is he?" I whispered, even though I was certain I knew what she was about to say.
"Forest Lawn Cemetery." A single tear rolled down her cheek as she reached up to swipe it away.
Fuck, it was exactly what I didn't want to hear ... not today.
And this was a conversation I definitely did NOT want to get into right now. This girl was sweet and all, but I had enough of my own shit to deal with, I couldn't take on her issues too.
Before I could stop her, she began her story, almost like she needed to purge herself of it in a way only a talk with a stranger could do. "He OD'd." She whispered as I pulled a long drag from the smoke I just lit.
Good thing I had my habits under control. I would never end up like Ben. I could control things better than he could, obviously. I was only in here because I needed a break. Plus, being here was a sure fire way to get the Band Manager and my parents off my ass about every fucking thing.
"Cullen, you got a call." Someone yelled out the back door. I was relieved. It was a good time to break away from Angela and her story without hurting her in the process. She looked a little more at peace, even though she only got to share such a small part of her hurt.
"Nice talking to you." I said as I stumped out my smoke and headed inside to the phone.
"Hello?"
I only heard sniffles and deep breaths, but I knew instantly who they belonged to, "Bella, baby? Is that you?"
A few more seconds of dead air passed, "Princess? Can you talk? Are you alright?" I almost yelled into the phone as I felt the panic start to rise. It scared me beyond words that she was in trouble or even worse ... hurt, while I was stuck in here and couldn't protect her.
"Edward?" She finally spoke.
"Bella." I said with a sigh of relief while my body soaked up her voice.
"I miss you. Where are you? Your friend said you were in a rehab? It's my birthday ... I need you." Bella's voice shook and her words were scattered as I listened to her.
"Oh Princess, I miss you so much. So fucking much. I need you, too." I said as I did my best to hold in the tears that threatened to fall.
"Come to New York ... please? Come see me ... I need you so much." Bella cried, and it twisted my heart in knots to hear her sobs.
"Princess, I can't come yet ... I have to stay here for another thirteen days before I can come to New York. Do you want me to come then?" I asked, my voice begged for her to agree to wait for me.
"I'll be gone, Edward. I leave in four days. Come now ... please? Please, Knight? I need your help. I need to see you." Her voice killing me more with each word, each plea; they tore down all of my willpower. I just couldn't say no to her. She worked so hard and found me here in this hell hole to let me know she needed me. I couldn't let her down. I needed to get to her and make sure she was taken care of, that all her fears were wiped away. I needed to be her Knight once again.
But fuck, I was here behind locked doors. Would they let me out? Hell no! They would tell me I needed to be here, that I needed to be strong before I could help someone else. I didn't buy that bullshit at all. There was nothing in the world that would make me stronger than when I took care of my Princess. Nothing. A small flicker of a thought formed in my head, there was nothing that really kept me here except ... me. After all, I signed myself in. I could sign myself out. Besides, I wasn't worried about myself at all, I knew I could handle my problems, I'm not a true addict. So why the fuck can't I just check myself out of here and go see my Princess? My resolve was firmly in place when I spoke again.
"Hold on, Bella. I'm coming to you tonight. It'll take me a little while to get out of here and then get to the airport, but I'm on my way. Where are you?" I asked as I searched for a pen and paper on the nearby desk.
She gave me her hotel address and her phone number. My mind was in a tailspin as I started to think of how I was going to get out of here and on a plane so I could see her tonight.
"I love you, Edward. Please hurry." Each word sounded more desperate and needy. I had to get to her and fast.
"I love you too, Princess. I'll be there soon." Then the line went dead.
I had to stop and think quickly about how all of this was going to work. It was already three-thirty. I knew the last flight out to New York would be leave in about forty-five minutes. Don't ask me how I just remember random shit like that. At times it's a gift and others it's a curse.
It would be close, but I would keep my promise to Bella. She would be in my arms before the night was over ... even if it killed me.
A/n: URGH….he's killing me…how about you?
The hand on the heart just about killed me in my vision of this fic…but, it's him, all him.
Thoughts?
See ya Thursday!
kyla
