Chapter 20: Frustration

The next morning, Roxas and Axel were sitting on the Grey Area waiting for Saix to give everyone their respective missions. Saix and Xemnas weren't seen in all morning to the surprise of everyone, Xion hadn't been seen either but Roxas and Axel guessed she was on her room sleeping due to her night time mission.

Everyone was wondering were Saix was, but specially one Nobody was more curious and afraid of where "Xemnas Left Hand" was…

-Hey I'm really afraid now, Saix has never showed up late since I remember, Ever! Aren't you afraid, coz' I am! –Demyx told Axel who was starting to get irritated because of the Melodious Nocturne

-I know Demyx! But, just like you and me, the man can show up late sometime! –he answered irritated, but Demyx continued

-But… He is Saix! He never shows up late! You know something? I better get back to my room, I don't want to be here when he shows up! –Demyx said running back to his room, Axel sighed in relief

-Finally he's gone! –he sighed, Roxas chuckled

-I know, what's the big deal if Saix doesn't appear anyway? If he's not here, then we have a day off again, right? –Roxas asked

-Dream on. Trust me, never, ever we'll get to days off on a row. –Axel replied, Roxas sighed

-Shut up, and let me dream.

Meanwhile at the Round Room, Saix and Xemnas were with Xion, who was explaining what happened with the Impostor. She had her hood on since she didn't wanted them to see her face in such a depressed state.

-I find and fought the Impostor… and lost…

-I thought I said "Failure wasn't an option". –Saix repeated

-I know… but… he was strong, I couldn't beat him by myself. I just… couldn't. Please, forgive me. –she said in a mix of shame and anger with herself

-It doesn't matter. After all, you were always a failure to begin with… Saix said glaring her, Xion set her sight on the floor, now feeling sure she was ashamed, Xemnas spoke again

-Number Fourteen, can you at least be useful and tell us something we don't know about the Impostor? –Xemnas asked, the question actually hurt the girl, not the question itself, but the way it was asked, was she really that useless for the Organization?

-…I guess….He said he was waiting for one of us to appear so that he could take him or her out. –she answered

-Really? So what are you exactly doing here? –Xemnas asked, raising an eyebrow, Xion stop to think a little and he was right, maybe the Impostor was not trying to take out the Organization Members, after a short time, she answered

-I…I don't know. Maybe he was waiting for someone in particular…

-Tsk. Even the Impostor thinks you're a waste of time. –Saix replied in disgust, Xion couldn't stand anymore the attacks of Saix and she quickly glare at him as soon as he insulted her, her face was now visible to them, Saix smirked at the gesture of the girl

-Got a problem with what I said?

Xion was ready to summon her Keyblade, but she quickly realized that doing that, specially in front of Xemnas was a big mistake, so she tried to relax herself just when Xemnas spoke trying to calm both of them

-Enough you two. Xion, what does this Impostor looks like? –Xemnas asked, Xion and Saix were still glaring at each other

-Actually, he looks a little like you, Lord Xemnas. Grey long hair. Mmm… a little taller than Roxas, maybe… Oh, and he was blind folded, but I don't know why however. –she answered, Xemnas nodded

-Good, at least we now have some information about him.

-Lord Xemnas, can I go now? –she asked politely, but Xemnas shook her head

-Before you go, tell me… you should already know all basic magic spells, why didn't you cure yourself and tried facing the Impostor again? –he asked, Xion sighed and set her sight on the floor again, ashamed

-…I…I haven't… learned the spell, yet… -she said quietly, Xemnas sighed

-How surprising… -Saix said sarcastically

-Enough. Xion, you're going out on missions tomorrow, take your time for resting today, understood?

-…Yeah. –she quietly said nodding

-Fine, you can go now. –he finally said, Xion nodded, got on her feet and left the room.

She slowly walked to her room, as soon as she entered and closed her door, she felt to the floor and started punching it trying to release all the anger and impotence in her. She felt as tears were forming on her eyes, but she didn't had idea what they were and just cleaned them by instinct.

-I'm not useless… I'm…not…useless… -she repeated whispered, trying to ease the pain and impotence she felt…

A few hours later, Roxas was happily eating his ice cream on the Clock Tower, Axel joined him some minutes later and talked as they always used to. After about an hour waiting, they began wondering were Xion was, since they thought she didn't had a mission that day, she'll be resting, but not even Axel could sleep that much, so they went to the Castle and started searching for her.

Obviously, the first place they searched was her room, but no matter how much they knocked, nobody opened, so it was obvious she wasn't there, or at least that's what they thought.

-Finally, they're gone… - Xion whispered when she heard Roxas and Axel footsteps getting away

She was sit on her bed, curled like a ball with her arms on her knees, and her head resting in them, all covered on a white blanket. For some reason, she didn't wanted Roxas and Axel to see her on that state, maybe because she didn't wanted to disappointed them, they went through a lot so that she could get het Keyblade again…

-Though I don't have a heart, why do I feel so hurt? –she whispered

Now that she had relaxed a little, her mind was busy again, but not on Saix words, but a very different thing. She had stopped to think in what the Impostor told her. Why would he say he'll not be defeated by a fake? Why did he said her Keyblade was a sham?

-It makes no sense… why did he said that? –she asked herself confused

She shook her head trying to think in another thing, thinking also maybe it was a bad idea not to opened the door to Roxas and Axel when she could. She sighed and got a closer look to her arms and feet, they were covered with small wounds…

-It hurts… -she sighed depressed

The next day, Roxas and Axel didn't saw Xion on the morning either. Axel told Roxas maybe her mission took longer than expected, which relaxed the blonde a little. He was late for his mission, he was walking to the stairs for getting to the Grey Area when he spotted Saix and Xion talking, the girl had her hood up, as she always did when she wasn't with Roxas or Axel.

-Just give me one more chance, please… -the girl asked

-How obstinate… Since we're all preoccupied for the moment… You're to leave for your next mission. –Saix told her walking away, Xion sighed

-Hey Xion! Where you've been? –Roxas asked walking to her, but as soon as she saw her, she ran not wanting him to know what happened. Roxas stared in confusion the running girl, Xaldin appeared and got angry when he saw Roxas slacking off just like Demyx used to do….

-Hey, what are you doing here? Get on your mission, now! –Xaldin ordered, Roxas nodded

-…Right…

As the girl run, she was wondering why she didn't wanted to see Roxas or Axel…

-Why am I running away? I don't get it myself… But I don't think I can face Roxas…To have failed a mission, is it because I worry about him? –she thought as she run.

That same day, Xion didn't showed up for ice cream again. Roxas commented with Axel what happened between them that morning, but he said maybe she was on her "specific time of the month" and that's why she was acting strangely, something that Roxas didn't understood however.

The next day, Xion woke up at dawn, being unable to sleep anymore. Her mind was focused on the Impostor's words and she couldn't shake them off her head no matter how hard she tried, his words started bringing her doubts about who she really was, who she was before being a Nobody, or why she was in the Organization…

Later that day, Xion's mission was at Twilight Town, collecting hearts as usual. Unfortunately for her, while she was destroying Heartless, she found Roxas whose mission was also there, so she couldn't run from him this time. After finishing, they both went to the Clock Tower as they used to…

-I'm sorry… -she said after a moment of silence

-What for?

-Yesterday…I shouldn't have run off like that… And for not showing up here….-she explained

-It's fine. It didn't bother me. There's gonna be times when you might not feel like coming, right? Anyway… What happened?

-…I don't… quite understand what happened either… -she answered, gulping

-…Are you sure you're ok? –Roxas asked concerned, but Xion ignored him with another question

-Why am I in the Organization? –she thought aloud, Roxas was surprised and confused by her question

-Well, the Organization needs us…We're the only ones who can use the Keyblade. After all, we're "special"…right? –he explained, a sad smile appeared at Xion's face

-Special? Well…We may both be special, Roxas… But I don't think we're the same… -she said quickly opening a dark corridor and stepping into it, Roxas stared at her in confusion

-Xion… what's the matter? Wait! Xion… -he tried to stop her, but she was gone. He sighed in defeat and started wondering what was wrong with the girl, even more concerned than before

Meanwhile, at The World That Never Was, a guy with an Organization coat was walking through the streets of the Dark City, the guy put off his coat revealing a long grey hair, and a blind folded on his face.

-I wonder, who she is? She's the spitting image of…Kairi. She's not a normal Nobody. –the guy mumbled to himself

He continued walking through the streets of the Dark City and stopped just as he had a sight of the Organization Castle, suddenly from behind him a dog appeared, the same dog Axel and Xion found days ago…

-Let's go, Pluto. –the Impostor mumbled, opening a dark corridor and stepping in it with the dog


That's it. We're approaching to the best (and my favorite) part of the story, but as I already told you, things will change from the original storyline.

As I always tell you, please Read and Review!