Some loved it, some were shocked, someone saw it coming, some said Bella was acting like a selfish bitch (NOT TRUE! Try to place yourself in her shoes with her past!) and some said "Erm. Work to do. Definitely. There were wrongly used words, bad grammar mistakes, bad spelling mistakes, weird tense changes and some overall, very nonsensical things in here that need to be fixed. Was this looked over by your beta...? Maybe it's a good idea to double or triple check before the next post... Yeah. It would help." (Okay, okay, so only one person said that) and others...well you guys made me blush. :) And when I'm really into my stories, I tend to make mistakes. Like no one has ever made any of their own. And I don't have a beta. They get to me. And I'm not made either! Just saying. :) Anywho, here's the next chapter, and welcome, India! And remember, this story is from Bella's point of view ONLY! I'm the only one who knows what happened to Edward and his family the next morning…maybe I'll add it when I'm done with this story.
Missing Piece of the Puzzle
Chapter 28: The Cave
Breathing hard against the cold night air, still feeling the sting of broken glass shreds and blood on my hands, I ran faster and faster to The Cave. I almost forgot where it was, but my feet automatically took me to what I was looking for. As I neared the familiar area, my ballet bag seemed getting heavier and I was exhausted. Getting closer, I stopped and made sure on one was watching or following. No one was. Who would? I licked my dry lips and continued running, past a dark alley, and into a vacant street. I knew, with the familiar crunch of gravel under my feet, I was where I should be. I was home. Walking closer to a hole in a wall of an abandoned building, I shoved my bag in and soon entered the hole as well. Crawling for a short period and pushing my bag ahead of me, I finally entered a large, well lit, cave.
It was a mystery how Karina and Jazmin found this place, but they told us it was when their parents (who were very rich and great friends, hence the reasons those two girls knew each other so well) owned the abandoned building, having their own, and very successful, company. By the time Jazmin and Karina were ten, the company was accused of many things, and the long investigation led to having it close down, their families left with nothing. Their parents weren't very smart, and couldn't get jobs. It was a wonder how they got business running in the first place! Everything ever given to them, and anything they ever bought, was taken away. Jazmin and Karina, who were eleven at the time, made the covers of Forks' newspaper and magazines, known as the innocent girls with horrible parents. Mr. and Mrs. Santiago and Green were appalled at all the attention their girls were getting. Missing the lime light, Mr. and Mrs. Santiago and Green moved together to somewhere in Miami, with whatever money they had left. Alone, Jazmin and Karina became old news by the time they were twelve, and being with Karina's grandmother, lived alone in their family's company old building. While they were playing outside, they found The Cave. They stored anything important to them in The Cave, and everyday, since the age of twelve, worked on making The Cave bigger and better.
Karina's grandma died they were thirteen years old. With no one to take care of them, they kept Karina's grandma's death a secret, not wanting to be foster children. Since middle school, they gathered up girls who have just as bad a past as they had to be in their gang. That's why both of them were known as the 'leaders'. And whenever one of us needed a place to stay, we are always welcome to stay with them in The Cave. And in the building, we had special appliances that worked – refrigerator, broken down washing machine, and an old microwave. I never realized how much Karina and Jazmin actually do for us – there is at the least twenty something of girls in the gang. All that stealing, robbing…it's for us. No wonder they made me help out. They can't do it alone. And me helping them cheat…well, I guess they don't want anybody left behind. Come to think about it, I'm the one with the easiest past here. No wonder they disliked me so much.
And now, after all they've been through together, Jazmin is left alone. I still can't believe Karina died that Halloween night, but the blood stains on my dress prove it all. I think she would've died with all the drugs anyway, not to sound mean.
I dusted myself off, entering the real cave, finally being able to stand up. The Cave wasn't very big in height when you first enter, since it actually becomes huge after a few steps, but I'm not the tallest of people so I only had to duck my head a little near the entrance. Of course, since I haven't been in here for years, so I forgot about that and slammed my head on the ceiling, echoing a loud thump through The Cave and it's many rooms.
"Ow!" I yelp, falling down on dirt and rubbing my throbbing head.
"Well, well, well, someone got hurt in here, must mean little Bella's back." I heard Claire, the…eh, bitch, if I do say so myself, of the gang.
I turned around, still sitting on the rocky floor, and looked at up at Claire standing against one of the curved brown walls. "Claire."
"Bella," she barked.
"Bella?" I heard from afar.
More and more voices asked my name from behind walls and other passageways. Only two different footsteps were heard running around, a background to many people talking in other 'rooms'. Claire looked me over with an unpleasant look on her face and left me alone. Soon, Sarah, who always stays here, and Jazmin ran in. They stopped as soon as they saw me.
"So you are back," Jazmin said quietly, stopping in her tracks.
"Bella!" Sarah helped me up and gave me a warm hug. "What are you doing here? How's Ed-uh…everything?" She looked back at Jazmin to make sure she didn't catch anything.
"I heard you were staying with the hunky guy in the office," Jazmin said calmly, her hands folded over her chest. "Get knocked up yet?"
"What?" I asked, and looked at Sarah with panicked eyes. No one was supposed to know! I wasn't pregnant, but I meant about Edward.
Sarah shook her head and stepped away from me. "I never said anything, I swear!"
"You didn't have to," Jazmin walked closer to me. "We all knew. Everyone in school knew, besides the teachers of course, but that's just because they're stupid."
"I…"
"What happened? Why are you here?" Sarah asked me.
I looked down, playing with my fingers. "I...left."
"You what!" Sarah yelled.
I looked up at her. "I'm scared, okay? Everything was too…too perfect, too fairytale-like. My life shouldn't be like that, so I left. Besides, I never really…" I gulped and shook my head sadly. "I never really had feelings for Edward anyway."
"So you left?" Jazmin asked incredulously, looking very, very mad. Why? I figured she'd be happy I left my amazing lifestyle.
"Yeah…" I answered unsurely. Sarah stared at me, her mouth wide open.
Jazmin shook her head unbelievingly. "Ugh, I can't believe this," she said to herself, and then looked up at me. "You know what Bella…" She moved from one foot to the other as I waited for her to punch or hit me. Instead, she shook her head one more time and stormed off.
I looked back at Sarah. "What's her problem?"
Sarah finally closed her mouth, looking extremely confused. "Uh…I don't know. Ever since Karina died she's been different. But how-why?" She opened and closed her mouth continuously, blinking a lot. "Why did you do it, Bella? What do you mean you were scared? Everything seemed perfect!"
I bit my lip and shook my head, picking up my ballet bag. "I don't wanna talk about."
Sarah has known me forever, so she knew me well. She knows there was something else, but like any good friend would do, she stayed quiet. That is, until she saw all the dry blood on my hands.
Sarah gasped. "Bella! What happened? Are you okay?"
I nodded, gripping the straps to my bag tighter, and blushed. "I'm fine."
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Sarah found some gauze and helped me rap it around both of my hands. She let me stay with her in her room, which was a great sized, round cave within The Cave, area with a mattress, pieces of wood hammered together as a door, and different sized mirrors glued together to make one large mirror on the curved wall. About six different pieces of each clothing item – socks, shirts, pants – were thrown all over the floor.
"I see you picked up in here," I said placing my bag on her mattress. She didn't have a real bed, just a mattress on the floor.
Sarah quickly picked up her clothes. The big load of items almost looked too large for her tiny frame. Anorexia can really make someone skinny…
"Sorry, sorry, I didn't know you were coming," she apologized.
"It's okay," I took the clothes from her and threw them on the mattress, beginning to fold them nicely. I always felt like her mother, but I don't mind. "How have you been?" I asked casually, hoping she wouldn't catch on to what I really wanted to know: was she eating?
"Gee, Bella," she helped me with her laundry. "Why don't you just ask if I'm fixed yet?"
"You're not broken," I demanded, ironing her jeans with my hand.
She sighed. "I've been getting…better. Omar is a big help. Plus…" I heard mischief in her voice. I looked at her questioningly.
"What is it?" I asked, looking up at her. The only way to fix her clothes was to kneel on the floor by the mattress, so I was on the ground while she was standing up.
Sarah giggled, something she rarely does, and swung her arms side to side. "He said he doesn't want his first time with a toothpick."
I immediately shot up. "Okay, I don't know what worries me most: him telling you you're a toothpick and you not getting mad, or him implying he wants to have sex with you and you not getting mad."
Sarah rolled her eyes. "We all know I'm a toothpick-" she sounded a little too proud of that "-and besides, it's not like you and you-know-who never did it." She winked and went for her blouse.
My face boiled with embarrassment. "We never had sex!"
Two girls – juniors, I think – were passing Sarah's room at that time. They stopped and gave me and Sarah a strange look.
My face got even redder. "No, not me and her, me and some other guy didn't have sex." Their faces became more disgusted. "Oh, will you just walk away!"
"Sheesh," Sarah said when the two girls scurried along the passageway. "That time of the month already?" She closed her door, if you can call it that, for privacy.
"Ugh!" I let myself drop down to the mattress. It was a longer fall than I remembered, but lucky for me, I landed where I needed to. "I'm sorry! I'm just so stressed out." I rubbed my temples, ignoring I wrinkled the pants I just ironed.
Sarah sat behind me. "Here, let me help." She always gave the best massages.
"Mmm, thanks," I smiled in bliss.
"No prob, but can I ask you a question without you going all Christian Bale on me on the set of Terminator?" (Remember he started cussing out at everybody?)
I laughed. "Go ahead."
"You and Edward never had…?"
I sighed, my eyes still closed. "No, not once."
"Okay." Sarah left it at that.
"Mmm...Keep going. Harder, please." She pushed her bony fingers deeper into my temples. It felt wonderful. "Hmm, that's it."
We heard a couple of gasps outside her room. I bet it was the same two juniors.
"We are not having sex!"
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One week later
"So Bella," Lesley asked as we all – well, most of us – sat in the largest and main area that's in the center of the entire Cave. "Did you get anything good for Christmas from Mister Hunk?"
I think you can guess who Mister Hunk is.
"Uh, no, I left before we opened presents." I picked at my nails for distraction. I also felt Sarah tense next to me, preparing to stand up for me when needed.
"I saw those pictures of you and him in Sarah's room," she continued, referring to the pictures of Edward and me. Of course, since I 'betrayed' them, they wouldn't acknowledge the fact that Sarah and I now shared the same room. The glass from the picture frame was completely broken, tearing small holes in some of my shirts, so I just left the pictures on their own. They got dusty by being on the dirty floor so long, but what can I do?
"So?" I asked rudely.
"If you're over him, then why do you still have those pictures?" I felt all eyes on me.
My eyes watered and I felt my face burn. "Why not," was my simple answer.
"You say you don't like him anymore. Prove it." Lesley got up and five minutes later came back with the pictures. She threw them at me. "Tear them to shreds. Go ahead."
I stared at the pictures on my lap. No, I don't love him. I don't, I don't. …Then why can't I stop staring? I forced myself to turn away, eyes closed.
"Leave her alone!" Victoria, a freshman, yelled. "It's not her fault she listens to her heart and her gut."
"Oh, shut up!" Claire spat, standing up for Lesley. "Did you follow your heart or your gut when it came to letting your dad sexually harass you?"
"Hey!" I screamed. "Don't talk to her like that!"
Victoria's eyes watered.
"Make me!" Clair dared.
I gave the pictures to Sarah and got up to face Claire. She was the exact same height as me with black, messy hair that ended an inch above her shoulders.
"Bring it."
Rose, a rich senior, spoke up. "Oh my God you guys, can you, like, stop fighting for a second and help me find some sort of signal here?" She held her phone, like the one Alice gave me (I left it with Edward), up to the ceiling.
"Stay out of this, brat." Lesley snarled. "Just because your rich daddy refused to give you a raise in your allowance doesn't mean you have the right to be here. Just like Bella."
"I've been part of this gang since I was fourteen. Don't tell you dare tell me I don't belong here!" I defended myself.
"Well where else did you expect me to runaway? All my friends went off skiing for the winter!" Rose whined.
"And when someone needs a place to stay, they come here." Jazmin, who has been awfully quiet the past week, got up from the corner and walked to Rose. "Put your damn phone away. You won't get a signal down here."
Rose made a disgusted noise in the back of her throat and snapped her phone shut. "Fine! I'm going to bed. God this place sucks! And why can't you have television? I mean, it's the least you can do. And where can I charge my iPod? I need to charge my…" We could hear he complain all the way to her dorm.
Jazmin rolled her eyes and sat down next to Victoria. "There's some Snickers left in the frig upstairs. They won't last long, so you better hurry. I'll even get someone to go up and get 'em for you, if you want."
Victoria wiped her tears away.
"Baby," Claire rolled her eyes.
Victoria shook her head. "No thanks. I'm going to bed now." Jazmin nodded and helped her find her way – she was still new.
Before she walked out, Jazmin pointed to Lesley and I. "As for you two, there was finally enough erosion down here to cover up the blood from the last couple of fights. I don't want to have to wait another season just to watch out where I step."
Biting the inside of my mouth, I went back to sitting next to Sarah against the wall, arms folded in front of me.
"Chicken," Lesley muttered, her and Claire walking out as well.
"Not even worth it," I told myself. "Not even worth it."
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Monday, January 5th, first day back at school…
Sarah and I finally reached the side of the school. I wasn't used to walking to school anymore, so my feet were a little tired. Not to mention I stole for the first time since August yesterday, and my conscious hadn't cleared up.
"Do you think you'll run into Edward today? Or that he'll call you to his office?" Sarah asked, looking around for someone – Omar, probably.
I was looking around myself. Not for someone, but just incase to hide from someone. "I doubt it," I said, answering her question. "He only needed to come here for the first semester. It's over now; he can't come back."
Sarah stared at me as we walked closer to the cafeteria. "Then why does it seem like you're watching out for him?"
"Because," we walked along the gate that led to the back of the cafeteria. "I don't know if he's looking for me or no-"
Sarah grabbed my wrist and covered my mouth with her other thin hand. "Shh! I hear someone," she whispered.
"Who?" I asked quietly, removing her hand from my mouth. Sarah had the best hearing in the world.
"…Edward," she turned around and ran to hide behind the corner. I quickly followed her, and as she squatted down, I looked out over her head.
"Where? I don't see-" I gasped. There was Edward, walking up to Lauren. Emmett was with him, but he wasn't following. He was standing by the bench, looking around vigorously.
Looking for me.
"Shh," Sarah reminded me as Edward neared Lauren. She was checking her reflection in the clear cafeteria doors.
He tapped her shoulder. "Umm…excuse me, Miss?" His voice entered my ears and shook its way down to my heart.
Lauren turned around, first looking annoyed then excited when she saw Edward. "Mister Cullen! Hi." She gave him a Colgate white smile. Sarah pretended to gag, sticking in finger in her mouth. I slapped her shoulder, not being able to hear their conversation.
"Uh, hello. I was wondering if you've seen Isabella Swan?" He asked, looking anxious.
"Isabella who?" Lauren asked, looking deeply confused. I could feel Sarah rolling her eyes.
"Isabella Swan," Edward repeated. It was torture hearing him say my name. I don't love him! Why does my heart long for him if my brain is telling it not to? I can't have feelings for him. I don't have feelings for him. Why can't my dense heart understand that!
Edward raised his hand under his chin. "About this height, big brown eyes, small figure, very intelligent, beautiful smile." My eyes watered and I heard Sarah stifle,'awe'.
Lauren looked like a plastic mannequin as she thought about it.
"Caution," Sarah hissed. "Blonde thinking!" I managed to bite my lip from laughing.
"Oh!" Lauren's brain finally kicked in. I could swear I heard Edward say 'finally' under his breath. "That girl, psh, why would you wanna look for her?" I looked down to the ground. I was asking myself the same thing.
Edward seemed irritated. "I just-I need to see her. Okay? Can you tell me where she is?"
Lauren stepped closer to Edward, suggestively placing her light hand on his broad shoulder. Anger boiled inside of me. "No, I don't know where Bella is, but you're better off with me…"
Edward threw her hand off of him. "Thanks for all the help." He turned around and walked to Emmett. "This is useless!" he shrilled.
"Maybe she didn't come to school today. Maybe she dropped out. Maybe she-"
"Emmett!" Edward seemed so…unlike himself today. "You're not helping. At all."
Emmett nodded. "I told you that Malibu Barbie: Slut Edition wasn't going to help you with anything. Look, I love Bella as much as you do-" My heart ached at the word love. "-not in the same way, but I still love her." He pulled my old baseball cap out of his back pocket and placed it on his head. It fit him small, and he looked slightly deformed, but I felt the tears warm my eyes. "My Little Drug Addict…" he said sadly.
Edward slammed his hand on the bench. "Dammit!" He then clutched his bronze locks in fists, pulling at them with anger. "Why did she leave, Em? Why!"
Some students began to stare. Emmett noticed this and came up behind Edward, placing a hand on his shoulder. "C'mon, man, let's not do this here. She's obviously nowhere to be found, because she doesn't want to be found. We looked through all Christmas break. We can't file a police report because she not legally part of our family. There's nothing left to do but wait, as much as it hurts us. Let's go." His voice held no emotion, which was horribly unusual for Emmett.
Edward sucked in his lips and shook his head aggressively.
"Fine," Emmett dropped his hand. "But you're gonna need a ride. Your class starts in twelve minutes."
One last time, Edward kicked the brick wall of the cafeteria as he made his way out to the parking lot, and left.
"Wow," Sarah breathed as we stood up straight and leaned against the side of the cafeteria. "That was intense. I've never seen Edward so, so…so mad!" I nodded in agreement.
Honestly, I was happy to see Edward, even if he was in rage. Hearing his voice, looking at him…it made my day. But now, I realize it made my life worsen. Now I just own the memory of something I'll never have again. Edward will soon move on, as well as his family, and I will be that one girl who got away.
And they will be ecstatic about it.
Edward needs someone with a future, to grow old with and not have any regrets.
I'll always be the regret.
"Bella!" I jumped up and slid down against the brick wall.
Breathing hard and a hand over my beating heart, not just from the sight of Edward, I barked back. "What!"
Sarah quickly helped me up. Even though she was really thin, I was able to put my weight on her since I couldn't stand up on my own. She scared the heck out of me!
"Sorry, sorry," I still let myself be pulled up by her. "I kept calling you but you didn't listen. You had this weird look in your eyes, like whe-Omar!" She let me go and I immediately fell to the ground again, scraping my blue jeans.
Sarah ran to Omar, and since she was so light, he picked her up and twirled her around just like in the movies. Yup. Everything was perfect for them… I felt myself frown looking at how happy they were. But I shouldn't. I really am happy for them, so I need to suck up my own feeling and be proud my best friend finally found that guy.
I got up, dusted myself off, and smiled brightly as I walked to them. I nodded at him. "Omar."
He looked at me, confused, settling Sarah down. "Uh, Bella? Is there something wrong with your face?"
I let my smile drop. "Sorry, I-I had something in my mouth." I rubbed my index finger over my front teeth. "All better!"
The couple gave me strange looks, so a blush bloomed from my cheeks. Luckily, the bell rang. "Well, gotta go."
I turned around and let myself be engulfed by the mass of students heading to class. I heard Sarah and Omar say their lovey goodbye's, and with a pop kiss, Sarah came rushing toward me, pushing people out of the way. "What was that about?"
I hurriedly wiped away my single tear. "Nothing," Running up the stairs, I entered class.
I was never going to see Edward again – the one who I shared the fondest of memories with. My first boyfriend, my first kiss…my first heart-break. And yet, I'll never regret any of it. I try to tell myself – to make myself – forget him. I don't' love him, I don't love him! I'm better off without him. Nothing seemed to work. I can lie to others, but it's just too hard to lie to myself. I'm not able to do it anymore.
As people came in, they tried their best to avoid me. I realized I was now sobbing, so I moved to the back of the room. Even there, people moved away from me. I cried harder, resting my arms on the desk and burying my head in them. I wanted to be alone – from Edward, from my so-called family, from everybody. Now, sitting here by myself, shaking with no one to hold me or comfort me as I cry my heart out, I finally got my wish.
I was alone.
End of Chapter.
So first Bella was okay with it, and now she's starting to see all the damage she's done to herself, and to Edward, as well as his family. Even though there seems so little to be happening in this chapter, it's really so much. Let me know if you like it!
Love, Mayface!
