5.27, Back in the Warm Gryffindor Common Room

Have I ever mentioned how lovely a person Tristan Davenport is? The lovely 7th year Gryffindor helped me carry all of my boxes and bags up to the Common Room! Oh, you don't know who Tristan Dav is? What is wrong with you, dear journal? Have you been living under a rock or something for the past six years? Ah, well, I'll tell you all about him then. After I sneeze.

5.28

Eww, boogeys! Disgusting! Where's a handkerchief when you need one?

5.29

Right, well... Ah, Tristan Davenport (Tristan Dav to everyone). He's a lovely Gryffindor seventh year who I've known for a very long time. The Davenports are nearly bosom buddies with my family, and I wouldn't be surprised if, somewhere along the bloody family tree, he and I are distantly related. Anyway, that being said, he's always been regarded as Hogwarts' Resident Golden Boy, which means he does not fall into the same league as the Marauders. Which, altogether, is a good thing seeing as he's a lovely bloke, top of his class, always seems to have this glow about him... As I said: Golden. He's got the loveliest brown curls, also. This causes me much distress when it comes time for the Reynolds Annual Christmas Fling Where All the Adults Get Drunk and the Children are Bored, as I'm always tempted to pull on a ringlet and watch it bounce back. Actually, I tried it once, but then he thought he'd get his revenge by pulling on my curls for the rest of the night.

5.34

Overall, he's a wonderful bloke and I'm sure any girl would be happy to be his girlfriend.

5.35

Not that I fancy him from afar or anything...

5.36

I'm just trying to keep my mind off the whole Incident Under the Mistletoe, as I've so dubbed it.

5.37

Urgh. I don't fancy Remus... I don't think...

5.38

I haven't told the Gang or anything... It really isn't any of their business anyway.

5.39

Seriously, Remus, why do you have to cause me so much distress!? I wasn't even this distressed when Sirius initiated the Snog Fest Tradition on Tuesdays. Honestly!

5.40

... Lily is eyeing me curiously...

5.41

Feel my cold, hard stare, Lilypad Evans!

5.42

It's like I'm burning her with my eyes... I can almost see her writhing in pain.

5.43

Well, I believe I'll go wander around for awhile until dinner... I think I'll get my clip-cloppers.

5.46, Random Corridor on the Third Floor

I don't think people realise how difficult it is to to pretend you're riding a horse and clip-clop at the same time. It truly is a rather difficult thing, especially when shouting "Oh Fetchez, oh fetchez, oh fetchez la vache, Drink up the milk, MOO MOO!". It's quite difficult!

5.49, Sitting on a Moving Staircase, Stuck next to James

He's a prat.

Who's a prat?

You.

Oh, well, I come to you, Oh Great Elizabeth, wondering about the little incident 'tween you and Moony at The Three Broomsticks earlier.

And?

Curious thing, isn't it, how he didn't seem at all distressed about having to abide by an old tradition.

... James, kissing under mistletoe isn't that big of a thing.

Oh contraire, Lizzie, it is a big thing. Huge, in fact.

And why is that?

Because you didn't pull away from him.

So? That would've been rude.

Since when are you so prim and proper, following etiquette rules?

Never...

Exactly. Just think back to what I said at the beginning of the year... About someone other than Sirius having an interest in you.

5.56, En Route to the Great Hall

James Potter is a barmy loon.

6.01, Gryffindor Table, Surrounded by the Gang

Alright, so someone told the Gang that Remus and I kissed under the mistletoe. Except they seem to think we had an all-out Snog Fest. Which we didn't.

6.03

Elizabeth! Why didn't you tell us?

Yeah! Don't you trust us?

... Where's Anne?

Off with her Ravenclaw.

Oh.

Don't change the subject. Tell us your side of the story, seeing as you're denying the Snog Fest theory.

Well, erm... This is awkward.

Indeed it is! But, in awkward times, we all must press on.

That was rather wise of you, Bridget.

Thank you!

So, get on with it!

Fine! Calm down, woman. So, Remus and I were carrying all my boxes and such back, as you very well know seeing as neither of you offered to help, and on the third trip back, he noticed mistletoe, I suppose...

Yes, and?

He kind of pulled me to him and kissed me. That's it! We didn't have a Never Ending Snog Fest as the two of you seem to believe.

We must confront him as soon as possible, Lils!

That we do!

No we don't! I mean, he was just abiding by a centuries-old tradition! It didn't mean anything!

Oh, but it did.

Yeah, I agree with Bridget. Just leave this to us, Lizzie, we've had more experience in this department than you have.

6.11

... What's that supposed to mean? Are they saying I'm inexperienced?

6.12

Well, I think being forced to snog Black is experience enough, thanks.

6.13

Note that I said "forced." Here meaning against my own free will and better judgement.

6.14

He's quite over-powering, you know.

6.15

... Remus doesn't fancy me!

10.32, Girls' Dormitory, In Bed

Well, I was sleeping quite soundly until Lily and Bridget barged in, having spoken with Remus about what happened. And now they want to document the discussion.

10.33

We were right!

All along, this whole time! And you never believed us!

The nerve, Elizabeth.

What are you talking about? I'm still sleepy...

Remus Lupin, you dolt.

What about him?

He fancies you!

Well, he didn't exactly come out and say those exact words, but it may as well have been as good as if he had.

So, he doesn't fancy me.

Are you deaf? ... Er, blind?!

No.

We just told you that he fancies you! Shouldn't you be bouncing off the walls or something? You two make such a smart match!

Stop trying to play Cupid, please. If he didn't say, "I fancy Elizabeth," then he has no interest in me other than a platonic relationship.

You're so helpless.

Agreed.

Good-night, you barmy lot.

20th of December, 7.32 in the Morning, Great Hall, Gryffindor Table, Enjoying a Quiet Breakfast

Well, it's a lovely Tuesday morning... And I'm eating... Without the Gang.

7.33

Woe is me, except not.

7.34

It would seem, Journal, that everyone, except myself, has caught the Love Bug...

7.35

Don't ask me how it happened, exactly, but Lily came rushing up to us Sunday afternoon saying she was now dating that Hufflepuff bloke, Jack Dunnington. And then yesterday, after having been missing for a few hours, Bridget waltzes in saying she's dating that bloody Gryffindor fifth year, Peter Jamison. I mean, honestly, what the

7.37

... Tristan Dav is sitting across from me. I'll have to put you away for a wee bit, so he doesn't think I'm completely mental.

10.19, History of Magic, In the Back, Desk Closest to the Door, Next to Remus

We're doing nothing but taking notes about some Goblin Wars or something... Not really paying attention. I'm far too busy glaring at the back of Lily's head, and the head of Dunce-ington.

10.20

Honestly, three days before Hols and everyone up and snatches a boyfriend.

10.21

It makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. I just can't wrap my brain around it.

10.22

Now, I'm Lady Singleness of the Single Clan in the Lonely Lands of Single, drinking from a Single Cup filled with Single Mead with a Lonely Heart crest decorating it.

10.23

However, Tristan joining me for breakfast was quite a surprise. Oh, of course we're on good terms with each other, but it is a rare thing indeed when he sits with anyone other than his mates. He apparently missed out on the Love Bug also, as all of his friends had gone off to escort their ladies to class. So he was left to finish his breakfast by himself, when he noticed that I too was sitting by myself, "looking like the saddest and loneliest creature" he'd ever seen. (Or so he told me.)

10.24

Do I really look that pathetic, Golden Boy? Ah well, we talked about the professors and, of course, Quidditch. And then we talked about what we got all of our mates for Christmas. The topic of conversation eventually turned to the Reynolds Annual Christmas Fling, which, ironically, happens a few days before Christmas. He said he always looks forward to our party, as all the other ones are boring.

10.25

Yes. Quite an exhilarating conversation between chums, I suppose.

10.26

Why aren't you taking notes?

Because I already know about the bloody, and ultimately ineffective, Goblin Wars.

Right... So, why was Tristan Davenport sitting with you at breakfast?

He thought he'd join me since I was sitting by myself. Is that such a crime?

No, I was just wondering. You could've sat with us.

Alright. I'll keep that in mind next time.

Good.

But that doesn't guarantee I'll sit with you lot.

Why not?

I'd rather talk to Dav than watch Sirius snog someone's face off.

Good point... How about next time you come sit by me, then?

Well, if you're going to go at that angle, why didn't you join me?

Because, erm... I didn't notice that Lily, Anne and Bridget weren't there. Speaking of, why were they missing in action?

They caught the Love Bug.

... What?

The Love Bug, you know. As in, they all now have boyfriends.

Ah.

Tristan and I were talking about how everyone had caught it except us.

Oh. Well, that's interesting.

Yes, I suppose it is.

I'm going to go back to taking notes now...

10.32

Odd.

10.33

I bet Remus has caught the Love Bug too. I shall ask him.

10.34

Have you caught the Love Bug?

Er, no... I'm not seeing anyone, if that's what you're asking.

Alright.

Why?

Just trying to figure out how big the Anti-Love Bug Club is.

Right. Take some notes, for Merlin's sake. I don't want to have to go over the Goblin Wars with you tomorrow night when you're trying to figure out what to write in your essay.

We have an essay?!

It's up on the board.

10.38

So bloody bored...

10.39

You know what would be quite hilarious?

10.40

Binns breaking out into song right this very second.

10.42

You know, I think I know a spell to make him do that...

10.43

Ahahahaha!!!!

10.44

I'm the most brilliant person I know!

10.45

Yes! Class has been dismissed five minutes early!

10.49, Corridor, Heading to Divination

Really, random spells do come in handy at times. Especially when the drab mood in the History of Magic classroom needs to be lifted. And what better way to do that than a hearty round of "Fetchez la Vache: The Song"?

10.58, Divination Classroom, Across from Bridget

Fetchez, oh fetchez, oh fetchez la vache, Drink up the milk, MOO MOO! Oh fetchez, oh fetchez, oh fetchez la vache, Fetchez la vache, MOO MOO! Fetchez, fetchez, la vache for me and you! Ahahaha.

10.59

You honestly cannot understand how utterly entertaining and hilarious having your ghost-teacher start singing the school's favourite song in an operatic baritone voice.

11.00

I really do amaze myself to no end.

19th of December, 12.12, Lunch, Great Hall, Gryffindor Table, Joined by Bridget, Tristan, and Remus

So, Bridget and her little fifth year broke up.

12.13

Yes!

12.14

Not that I take delight in my mate's pain and suffering and sulking...

12.15

Actually, the latter is quite annoying. All she's been doing all day is sniffling. And she went out with him for, what, two or three days?

12.16

I will never understand the whole Female Post-Break Up Mentality.

12.17

Never.

12.18

Because I will never catch the Love Bug.

12.19

I will go out and get a muggle vaccination for it, or something. And I shall live Happily Ever After in Singleness Land.

1.32, Transfiguration, Partnered with an Idiot Hufflepuff

You know, some people in this school really are dolts.

1.33

Take Dunce-ington, for example. He can't even perform a simple spell, and I've been waiting for him to do it for the past 15 minutes.

1.34

I, with all my magical genius, managed to successfully transform him into Swamp Thing on the first try.

1.35

We're working on a spell that allows you to turn a person into any creature you want.

1.36

I don't know why I turned him into Swamp Thing. I could've turned him into a singing cow or something.

1.37

And then force him to sing just like Professor Binns had to.

1.38

Which was quite funny, as he had to cancel all of his classes for the rest of the day, for every time he tried to talk, he'd sing "Oh Fetchez, oh fetchez, oh fetchez la vache...". Most excellent.

1.45

He still hasn't turned me into anything.

1.46

Note to self: Ask Lily why she's dating such a dunce.

1.52, Heading to Ancient Runes

Honestly, Dunce-ington is a very befitting name.

1.53

He had to stay after class to talk to McGonagall.

1.54

Ha. So did Black, as he was misbehaving.

1.55

You know, now that I'm thinking about it, it's a strange thing that Sirius has left me alone for the past few days...

1.56, Ancient Runes Classroom

Hallelujah!

--------------------------------------

Whoo! Updates are lovely things, aren't they? Hope you enjoyed this chapter. Next chapter she may confront Remus about The Incident Under the Mistletoe. (Hint, hint.) As always, the Harry Potter World belongs to Jo Rowling, "Fetchez la vache" belongs to Monty Python, and the rest (characters you don't recognize, all the madness that comes from Lizzie's brain) is mine. Keep reading and review a lot! It makes me feel loved and happy inside. Yours.