I don't own Hetalia :p

Gilbert's POV

"Ludwig?" He stares at me, his eyebrows are furrowed and the tips of his thin lips are pulled down into a frown. I want to scream, cry, and apologize for everything. I don't, I keep my composure cool. I narrow my eyes and push Feliciano to him.

"I found your good for nothing boyfriend." I walk past him, my shoulder ramming into his. I feel a hand of steel grip my shoulder, I stop walking and growl out.

"I'd love to stay and chat, but I have to go play with the birds." Ludwig's light blue eyes reflect pain before being quickly masked by a cold scowl. His hand drops away from me and hangs limply at his side, I start walking again. Thunder beings to roll in the distance and a soft mist of rain starts to fall all around us.

"Gilbert!" Feliciano's voice sounds out and a pair of slender and tanned arms wrap around my torso. His voice quiets down a notch as he swiftly speaks in a begging voice.

"Please Gilbert. What good is it to hate your own little fratello? I know he can be scary and bossy but he has feelings! He might not show it but he misses you! You're his only family!" I clench my teeth.

"Look, obviously he doesn't really care if he thought I was some irresponsible little brat that abandoned his baby bruder! Yeah I know that I fucked up a lot on raising him and I should've taken us to an orphanage so we could at least have some kind of food to eat and a bed to sleep in! I know that I wasn't there all the time, but I was petrified that if I went back to where we lived thugs would follow me home and hurt him and the other kids I looked after. I'm fucking sorry that he was hurt a lot but I knew if we went to an orphanage he would be adopted and I would've been left alone! I know I was being selfish but he is my only family! He was the only reason why I even tried to live because I knew if I died, no one would be able to look after him." I let out a small sob and feel a tear drop down my pale cheek.

"I'm fucking sorry Ludwig. I was a terrible brother. I should have thought of your needs before mine, but I was so scared of being forgotten and left alone. I know that sometimes I used to beat and yell at you, I'm a monster I know. I couldn't help myself, I always felt like shit and then you were there, even though we lived in hell you always seemed to have a fucking smile and I was just so jealous that you were happy and I couldn't be. I think about this every day. That you will never forgive me for the things I did to you. I changed you from a happy and go lucky kid to a cold an emotionless being. I am so sorry for everything." Feliciano's arms let me go of their embrace and I turn to Ludwig, not even bothering to hide the tears anymore. He stares at me with wounded ice blue eyes, the rain matts down his light blonde hair. I look away in guilt and murmur.

"I don't blame you for hating me." I turn back around and start walking, my boots slap against the mud and it sprays on my soaked skinny jeans. The rain quickly turns into a downpour; it cools my already numb skin. Today has just been filled with a lot of disappointments. I think to myself as I shove my hands into my pockets. All of a sudden a pair of arms wrap around me. They aren't tanned nor are they slender. They hold me tight to the body behind me.

"You weren't a bad brother." Ludwig's deep voice rumbles out. I bite my lip and I turn around and hug him, when was the last time I even hugged him? Probably since he was around five, barely reaching my waist. Now he stands a good few inches above me. I don't even know what to say, him saying that makes me feel even worse because I was a bad brother. It would be better if he would just hate me. Guilt spreads throughout my body and I shake my head.

"No, I was." He stares down at me and awkwardly speaks out. He was never really good at talking about his feelings and stuff. That is probably my fault as well.

"Gilbert, I forgive you. You did what you could. I never hated you in my life; don't ever think that I do hate you. Growing up, I looked up to you because you were brave for what you did." I just stand there and cry into his shoulder.

"Ludwig, I don't see how you still even want to talk to me but I want you to know that I do love you. I will try to start to be a better brother from now on." Ludwig's voice starts to choke up and I can tell that he is crying.

"I- I love you too bruder. I will try to be a better brother as well." We let go of each other and I stare at him, studying him.

"Ludwig, can I ask you a question." He nods slowly and I smile I smile at him.

"Can I have some of your beer flavoured ice cream? Kumajirou and Gilbird ate all of mine." He stares at me like I am stupid. Feliciano floats between us and sings out.

"You ruined the moment Gil!"

Author's Note

The soccer part will be in the next chapter. I would've put it with this one, but then it would've been a long chapter and I was feeling lazy~ So instead this was just Gilbert's apology and how he ruined the moment. Gotta love Gil. So next chapter will be on Monday ^-^