Chapter 19

Bella's POV

Bringing out Bella

"Emmett! Jasper! Groceries!" Edward yelled from the front door.

"FOOD!" (AN: Wonder who that could be! Lol) the biggest guy i'd ever seen yelled from the stairs. Him and another boy, with shaggy blonde hair, bright blue eyes, and a lean looking figure, stampeded down the stairs and toward the door.

"Whoa!?" the blonde skidded to a stop, the gorilla boy fell into his back. "Dude, what up with the new girl?"

I blushed and ducked my head. "H-hi, I'm Bella Swan." I nodded to both of them.

"Dude! She does speak! Told you she wasn't a mute!" the big bear bellowed up through the house.

"Jasper, why are you here?" Edward asked edging into the house, I did the same.

"Alice."

"Oh!" Edward replied then glanced at me. "Well Bella, Emmett's the bear, and Jasper is Goldie-locks. Guys this is Bella. Go get the food in the car.

I pressed myself against the door. "They seem...cheerful," I commented grabbing the plastic bags in a more firm grip. "Where do we put these?"

"Oh! Right in here," he led me into a brightly lit kitchen.

"Wow! Is every room in this house this gorgeous!?" I asked placing the bags on the counter.

He laughed aloud. A woman, about mid-twenty's, early-thirty's, with wavy, shoulder length, auburn hair, bright blue eyes, and high cheek bones came into the room. "Thought I heard you come in Edward." she let her eyes travel around the room. They landed on me. He smile widened. "Oh my God! Edward, is this the Bella you won't give me any details about?" She came towards me, rather quickly. I tensed. Edward caught her arm before she got too close.

I blushed smiling. "It's ok, Edward. Yes, my name is Bella Swan." I said my voice trembling slightly.

Edward slowly let her go. The woman looked at him questioningly, then looked back at me. "Thought so. I'm Esme, we spoke on the phone earlier."

"Oh! You're Edward's Mom," I said shaking her hand. "Thanks for the information earlier too. My sister, Amber, she lived near there."

"Mom? Where's Jasper?" a familiar bubbly voice asked from the stairs.

"Getting groceries, Ali!" Edward answered putting a few fruits inside the stainless steel fridge.

"Edward! Why didn't you tell me you were back?!" the small pixie girl from the first day of school came into the room. She was facing Edward, so I had time to check out her style. I don't know why I do. I guess it was just the old me, making her appearance. Alice wore a pair of dark skinny jeans, a white and silver studded belt, a black tank top underneath a white Cheshire sweater. On her petite feet were silver flats with black bows on top.

"I thought you knew, lil sis," Edward chuckled. "You've met Bella Swan, right?" he gestured towards me.

Alice turned slowly. Her eyes didn't meet mine. "No...I, um, never met her but I've never seen them around school," she didn't meet my eyes at all. Her voice small an cautious.

Esme was looking at her in a peculiar way. "Alice, honey are you...?"

Alice turned and ran from the room. Edward went to chase her, but stopped. "I'll go," Jasper voice came from the door opening where he and Edward stood.

Edward nodded, worry etched in every crease of his gorgeous face. "It wasn't your fault." he said quietly to me, after Jasper called for Esme.

"Yeah it was." Me arguing. No surprise there. "She's seen Amber's eyes and mine. We remind of her of her mother. She's scared of what we bring back."

I felt his eyes on me as I unloaded all the bags and put them in categories; cans, fruits, stuff to put in the fridge, and stuff to put in the freezer. I turned to him. "What?" he was still staring at me. "Edward?" I asked waving my hand a little.

He shifted his position, blinked, tilted his head to the other side, blinked again, then shook his head. "Nothing. Sorry." he turned, then started muttering to himself about something.

"Edward?" a soft voice called from behind me. "Where's Esme?"

"Carlisle," he breathed motioning for me, with his eyes, to come to his side. I did. "She's-"

"Who's this?" the strikingly handsome blonde haired man asked interrupting Edward. His piercing blue eyes penetrating mine.

"Oh, this is Bella Swan. Bella, this is my Dad, Dr. Carlisle Cullen."

"Nice to meet you, Dr. Cullen." I said quietly. I'm sure he noticed the no handshake from me. He didn't question it.

"You too, Bella. Call me Carlisle, if you will. Here, at the house, and at the hospital." Carlisle smiled at me. I nodded staying closer to Edward than I had all day. He didn't give off the vibe of evil or deception, but he knew how to use a scalpel. There was no way in hell I was going to chance it.

"Ok. She's fine." Esme announced coming into the kitchen. "Oh Carlisle..." she came to his side and kissed his cheek, sweetly. Something in me envied her. She could have a man. She could hold, kiss...touch her man. She could trust him. I, on the other hand, had no one I could trust.

"Hey sweetheart. How was your day?" Carlisle asked easily dropping his hand on her hip.

"It was Football Day! How do you expect it went?" She asked smiling with adoration in her eyes.

"Should I punish Emmett for being...Emmett?" Carlisle asked playing along for the joke.

"YES!" a new feminine voice said loudly coming from behind Esme and Carlisle. "For the love of Gad! Please! Teach that boy some discipline. Cause he sure as hell ain't listening to me anymore!"

the beautiful blonde walked to the side of Esme that was not occupied. I cracked a smile at the girls rant. Edward and Carlisle chuckled.

"Now Rosie, you don't really mean that," Edward said lightly. He leaned against the counter. I did the same.

Rose spun to face him. "Oh Edward, don't even try to make this a joke!" she said all in one breath. "I swear-" her eyes landed on me- "don't remember you! Who are you?"

Before I could speak, Alice's small voice came from beside Edward. "Her name, is Bella Swan, Rose."

The blondes blue eyes got big as the new registered in her mind. "The Swan sisters?" she asked Alice quietly. Alice nodded. "Wow, you'd think they'd dress that way for school; they could seriously bump up their popularity points dressing like that."

Something inside me clicked and the old Bella jumped forth. "I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm standing right here!" I said in a hard voice. "Popularity ain't for everyone, honey. Some people just want to get the damn year over with and get the hell out!" Rose didn't say anything, no one else did either. Edward was probably the most shocked, seeing as he knew me better than the rest.

"Hold on, Princess." Rose was ready to fire back, and I was ready for the burn. "No need to get you granny panties in a twist-"

"Ain't no reason to pull your skanky thong out your ass either, no is it?"

She stood there for a minute. Staring at me. She smile at me, almost laughing. "Yes, I like what I see. I like you! You're alright." She held her hand out. "I'm Rosalie Hale."

I smiled back, placing my hand in hers. "Bella Swan."

Thirty minutes later, Edward and I were leaving. "I'll text you guys later. See ya!" I said to Alice and Rose, who already felt like sisters to me.

"Drive carefully, Edward. Be back soon," Esme said giving us both separate hugs. "It was nice meeting you, Bella. Maybe next time, we can meet your sister."

I smiled. My eyes tearing up, thinking of her as my mother. "I'll talk to her about it. Night Esme, Carlisle."

Edward had the car warmed up, by the time I sat down in the passenger seat. "I love your family!" I stated happily.

We stopped at a red light, he turned to me. "A what happened back there?" he asked studying my face.

"What do you mean?" I asked, stupidly avoiding the subject.

"You know what I mean." he said not missing a beat.

I stared at him, the light turned, he continued driving. We sat in silence for awhile. "I don't know," I said softly staring at my hands. "She was saying stuff about us, and...I've heard what people say at school, behind our backs." I paused thinking of what happened. Because in all truth, I really didn't know what had happened. "Then she actually had the...the nerve to say it while I stood there. I...I just...snapped." he nodded understanding. Silence hit us again. I thought a little about tonight and how I acted. "You know, tonight, at your house, I was...different?"

He nodded. "I noticed that, too. You were...alive." We stopped again at another red light. He looked over at me. "That was you, huh?"

I nodded. "Yeah, that...that was me. Before my life turned upside down. Before...Renee and Phil...before they turned into the unexpected. I was happy, out going, talkative as hell." I smiled sadly. "I realized just now, tonight, just how much they changed me. I used to be like I was tonigth. Happy, talkative, out going, alive, witty, smart ass-ish. I use to be that." a small tear fell down my face, seeing the blurry images of my life before dead, numb Bella came into the picture. Before the girl in the mirror was even thought of.

Edward smiled faintly. "And you showed who you use to be. She's still there. We proved that." The light changed, he continued driving, while talking to me. "We just have to bring her out...all the time." He paused. "We'll start small; your place, my place. Then we'll get a little bigger; you friends, those people you Dad knows in La Push, their houses. Then finally we'll work on the biggest; school, the mall, going out, theaters. Slowly, we'll re-build you. Build up your confidence that was taken away from you." he paused taking a deep breath. "Along the way, we'll work on physical contact." He stopped at, yet another, red light. "We could seriously get the old Bella back, for good, you know? You just have to be with it, Bella."

I nodded not saying anything. Why does he care? That's all I want to know right now. Why is he going to such great lengths to make sure I'm happy? I thought. A sliver of fear slithered its way into my stone covered heart. I shivered, afraid of what was to come.

Ten minutes later, Edward pulled up to my house. My black BMW right beside the white and blue police cruiser. "This is home," Edward said quietly.

"This is home," I repeated smiling smally. "You know, I'd give you a huge hug, like I do Ethan, Robin and Adam. But I don't want to chance it."

He nodded, then blinked. "Why would you give me a huge hug?"

I smiled, a small warm blush creeping up my cheeks. "You gave me a day were I could be me." I sighed wanting so badly to grab his hand. "You want to help me find the old me. You obviously care about my feelings, cause you go to great lengths not to touch me." I babbled my head off til I had to get more air. "Edward...thank you. Thank you for saving me a day of boredom. Thank you for understanding. Thank you for letting me show you the real me. And thank you for caring enough to want to bring her back out."

Edward was silent after that. He nodded suddenly. "You're very welcome, sweet Bella." I blushed. "But it should be me thanking you. Thank you, for gracing me with your presence. Thank you for letting me get close to you. Thank you for giving your trust to me. Thank you for gracing my family and I with the wonderful Isabella Swan. Thank you for letting me care for you, Bella."

We were both silent after that. All I wanted was a day, not to be me. All I wanted was a day to be able to feel again. To touch again. I'm sure Amber agrees with me. We both just want one day. One day. To be us. To be the real us. Not something our former guardians thought more suitable. Us! To be Isabella Marie Swan and Amber Mary Ray Swan. Edward sighed. "I don't want to let you go, but it's 11:46 and my curfew is mid-night. I got school just like everyone else, as do you, Bella. I'm sure Amber is waiting for you." He nodded towards the house.

"Yeah I guess you right. Damn! I hate it when the guy is right!" I joked opening the door.

Goodnight, Bella. Get some sleep." Edward said as the night chill hit my face and entered his car.

Why does this hurt? Leaving him? I asked myself getting out the car. "Goodnight, Edward. Don't get too much beauty sleep; yo might out shine Rosalie!" I laughed and he smiled crookedly. My heat jumped un-naturally high.

"There she is," Edward laughed. "Continue coming Bella, we're waiting for you!"

I knew he wasn't joking around. "Night Edward," I said. Tears filling my eyes as I turned away.

"Night Bella," he called before gunning the engine and turning the other way.

I sighed. "Bella..." an eerie voice rang through my head. A cold chill ran down my spine. Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit!

"Worthless piece of shit!"

"Coward!"

"Never wanted you!"

"Charlie wanted you! Not me!"

"Hate you!"

The sayings yelled at me restlessly and loud, like they were right there. I ran towards the house, the voices followed. I knew the voices; Renee, Phil, and Alex.

"Stupid!"

"Fat whore!"

Stupid cunt!"

"Slut!"

"Stop it," I whispered frantically. I made it to the door.

"Hate you!"

"Hate you!"

"Hate you!"

"I get it!" I yelled into the empty air, and ran into the house. The voices didn't say anything. I sighed. "Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!"

I threw my keys on the table, kicked off my converse, and shrugged out of my jacket. The stairs creaked as I slowly pulled myself off them. I stopped at Amber's door, shocked at what I saw. Amber, in Jacob's lap, kissing him. I mean a full, lips on lips, hands on his face kissing him. He was kissing back.

At first, I was shocked. Amber + Jacob + kissing? Not what I expected. Then again, my life has been the unexpected for a long time now. Then I was happy for her. Amber, who has been beaten for more than half her life, is finally getting the love she deserves. Lastly, I was envious. Not of their love. NO! God no! But of her. She went through way more and for a longer time period than I did. I would think I would be the first to crack.

"I-I I love you..."

I heard Amber's soft voice whisper into the barley lit room. I watched as Jacob's eyes brightened before he captured her lips with his once again.

"God...Amber...I love you, too!"

I could watch anymore. I walked back down to the kitchen, grabbed a glass, poured some cool orange juice, downed that, then came back to her room.

"I'm just so happy right now, Jake," Amber said tears thick in her voice as she leaned into his shoulder.

Time to make my appearance. "Amber?"

Jacob's eyes widened, silently asking how much I had seen? "Hey Bells!" he said, his voice shook with anticipation as he patted the place beside him.

I took a few steps in, both their eyes widened tremendously. "Oh Bella," Amber sighed, crawling off Jacob's lap and giving me a comforting hug.

I tried to make a joke out of it. "Do I really look that bad?"

Amber shot through it. "Yeah you do!" she pointed to her dresser. "Get some comfy Pj's on and you're spending the night with me, kay?" No reason in arguing, I went to her dresser, grabbed some black shorts, a green tank, and a some green and black spotted slippers.

I left to blow out the candle in my room and grabbed my phone charger. I decided to pick out my outfit for the next day too. After five minutes, I had black skinny jeans, a red belt with silver studs, a white belt with black and white studs, a long graphic t-shirt that read in red words, 'Boys lie...' and on the back it read, 'but not to me...' and lastly a plain black zip-up hoodie.

I head the click of Amber's window. Quickly and quietly, I ran across the hall to see her and Jacob embrace in a kiss...again. I slid in place on her bed.

"I love you, too, Jacob. See ya. Get some sleep. Please!" Amber called wistfully and then turned to me.

"I'm so...happy for you, Amber," I said not meaning for my voice to be so hard.

"You should be," she sniffed jumping on the bed and grabbing her phone. "I got someone who cares about me, as do you."

"What happened about only needing each other, huh?" I glared at her, hurt that she would need anyone elses' care than mine.

"Hey! I do need you! You're the only one who knows my entire story. You're the only one who's seen a glimpse of the girl I want to be." She glowered back. "Jacob, happens to help bring her out. He wants her just as much as we do."

I didn't retort. Not because I didn't have anything to say, but because Jacob was doing exactly what Edward was doing. "I guess I'm just a little envious." I said after awhile.

"Edward...he seems ok, though." Amber suggested getting underneath the covers.

"No." I said immediately, "Edward is not like that to me. And even if he was, he deserves someone so much better than me." I paused then Ethan popped in my head. "Oh my God! I totally forgot to tell you! They're here!"

she blinked. "Who's here?"

I rolled my eyes. "UFO's! Tina, Ethan, Raychel, Robin, Emma and Adam. They are here! All of them!"

"Tina and Ray...here? Great! God am I glad that Jake's transferring tomorrow!" Amber groaned collapsing into the pillows.

"I never understood why you and Tina and Ray never got along." Amber took her finger and pointed it at me. "Me? You guys fight, because of me?" The finger shook side-to-side; no. "Over me?" The finger nodded; yes. "You guys fight over me? What the hell? Amber, you are my sister, and Tina and Ray are my best friends. Period. You guys are going to have to deal with that sissy shit on your own terms. Just don't involve me in it!"

the finger went down and Amber nodded. "Fine. Any other news you want to share with me before we crash?"

"Um...Oh! I met the Cullen's and the Hale's. You would love Rosalie. She's just like us; sassy and fiery!" We laughed at the joke. "And Esme, oh...you'd love her. Hell, I love her! And you know how I am with mothers. She's young and so beautiful. Carlisle is a doctor, but he's cool. Jasper's funny as hell when he's around his family. Emmett's harmless. Alice is a shopaholic and a fashonista." I took a breather.

"What about Edward?" she asked her words slurring.

I sighed dreamily. "Edward. He's so amazing and caring and sweet and thoughtful and respectable and trustworthy-"

"Not to mention Greek God Gorgeous?" Amber interrupted with a small giggle.

I giggled too. "Yes. We can't forget the Three Big G's." We settled down. "Night Amber. Love you, sis!"

"Night Bells, love you too!" then we passed out, dreaming about our personal saviors and how they were going to bring us back.

Show me the love! You love me! I know! Thank you! Thank you! Alright school starts back up tomorrow. You all know what that means; possibly no updates till Thursday or Friday. Sorry but if the teachers don't give me tons to do, I'll try to get more in!

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