"Like Night and Day" has been nominated for a Wolfpack Award in the category of "Favorite Jacob (rated M/NC-17)." I'm incredibly excited about this! I knew I loved my Jacob for a reason...
Anyway, please go to http:// wolfpackawards. webs. Com /vote. htm and vote for my story! Voting ends TOMORROW!!!!
VOTE VOTE VOTE!!!!
**
Friday came and went the same as most of the other days that week — school, work, homework, a few hours of precious sleep before a strategy session with the wolves. At least I didn't have to work at Newton's that Saturday, and I was looking forward to relaxing. I was very aware that we had only a week before we would meet Victoria, and I was trying to let go of my stress for one day.
Jacob came over mid-morning. He looked exhausted, but kept his eyes from closing as I forced him and Charlie to watch "The Princess Bride" as I ran back and forth to the kitchen, prepping the slow cooker with all of the ingredients for homemade chicken and noodles for dinner that night. I felt in the mood for some comfort food.
Poor Charlie. Earlier, while he flipped through the channels on his way to ESPN, I had seen a flash of Fred Savage sick in bed and squealed. He generously relinquished control of the TV so I could enjoy the movie, and just sat there staring at the screen, his face twisted up in a look of slight disgust. Jacob had just shown up at the wrong time and now sat on the couch watching with a bored look on his face, occasionally laughing at Andre the Giant.
Charlie stood up suddenly, looking like he wanted to flee. "I'm running out to get some bait and other supplies for fishing tomorrow. I thought I'd pick up some lunch on the way back. Want anything?"
In Forks, our "fast food" options were limited. However, I knew that Charlie loved Pacific Pizza, so I told him I'd call some pizzas in and he could pick them up on his way home. He nodded and practically ran out of the door, escaping the chick flick.
As soon as his tires were out of the driveway, I immediately scampered over to Jacob's relaxed form on the couch, catapulting myself onto him, giggling.
"Ooof," he grunted as I landed on his hard stomach. He grabbed my wrists firmly, a twinkle in his eye. "What do you think you're doing, Bella Swan?"
I bent to kiss him and he held me back playfully — my lips were straining to meet his only inches away. I pouted my lip and tried again…and again he held me away from him, staring into my eyes with a mix of amusement and something else. I changed tactics, wriggling against him flirtatiously, noticing his eyes darken when I did so. My heartbeat quickened when I saw his reaction. Our playful wrestling slowed, but his hands remained on my wrists.
"You're being bad," he warned me, his mouth smiling but his eyes serious. He sat up and I tumbled back onto the other side of the couch, where I lay on my back, slightly panting, my hands pinned above my head by Jacob's large hands. "Now, what were you trying to do, bad Bella?" he mused. "Oh, right…this…" He bent down and brushed his nose against mine before taking my bottom lip in his mouth, sucking lightly and running his tongue against it. He stopped abruptly, pulling back to look at me. I must have been a sight, my eyes wild, my lips slightly swollen and my breath coming faster, a permanent blush staining my cheeks. "If you want to be a good girl again, you could ask nicely." Damn. He was teasing me! I loved this new, confident Jake!
"Please?" I whimpered. "Kiss me…please?"
His voice was a low chuckle as he quoted the movie. "As you wish…"
With a growl, he bent to me again and kissed me roughly, still holding my arms above me. We kissed for what seemed like an hour, tasting each other and playing with tongues and lips. Every time Jacob inhaled, he would kiss me with more fervor as the scent of my arousal became more and more obvious. Finally, one hand left its grip on my wrist and ran down my arm. He cradled my face in his palm as his lips brushed my cheeks, my eyes and my chin.
I moaned and whispered, "Jacob, I love you." Everything felt perfect. I softly murmured, "Forever…" He pulled away and his expression wasn't what I expected. He looked pained. Did he not believe me? My eyebrows furrowed and I whispered, "I do, Jacob. I love you."
"I know you do," he said. "And you know I love you too, right?"
If I hadn't been worried before, I was now. His grip on me loosened and we both sat up, the moment regrettably over. "What's wrong?" I asked. "Is everything okay? It's not…Victoria…is it?"
"No, no," he reassured me. "But I do have to talk to you about something…and I'm not sure exactly where to begin."
"Is this about what happened the other night?"
He sighed. "It's not something you and I have to worry about, but Sam thinks it's better if you know — if you understand." He seemed to brace himself before continuing. "Did you understand Kim when she said something about imprinting?"
"No."
He took a deep breath and took my hands. "Imprinting is another one of those wolf things that we didn't understand until we studied the legends," he said gently. "It's a way we find our soul mates. It only happens after we have phased. If we see her, we just know. It's an immediate, intense connection, and it remains with us our entire life. But it's sporadic, for all we know. It probably won't happen to everyone…it's supposed to be rare. It has only happened to a few of us. Quil just imprinted this week."
I looked at him with wide eyes, almost afraid to ask my next question. My head was spinning, but one I had to know one thing. Could I dare hope to have such a strong life-long bond with Jacob? Could all of my fears about his other obligations be alleviated?
He had said 'a few of us…'
"You love me," I said simply. He nodded, his face unreadable. "Have you…have you imprinted with me?" I couldn't keep the hope out of my voice.
Jacob cupped my cheek in his palm and grazed his thumb over my lips. I couldn't read his face, and I hoped beyond hope that this could link us together for life.
"No, sweetie," he whispered, obviously hating to say it. "I haven't."
"Oh." I looked down, tears flooding my face almost immediately.
Jacob tilted my chin back up, meeting my pained gaze with one of his own. "Hey," he said softly. "It doesn't happen for everyone. It doesn't change how I feel for you, Bella."
I clenched my teeth. "Look at me," I said fiercely, through my tears. "Really look at me…see me…imprint on me, Jacob…" My voice wavered, betraying me. "Please…"
"It doesn't work like that," he said sorrowfully, letting go of my hands to hold his head as if in pain. "It's totally involuntary." He saw my expression and became angry. "I knew that I shouldn't have put this all on you…damn Sam! It doesn't even matter for us anyway! It's not going to happen to me."
"You can't say that," I said, starting to hyperventilate slightly. "What if you imprint someday with someone else? Where will that leave me?"
Jacob didn't respond.
I gasped, realization flooding my mind. "That's what happened with Leah and Sam! He imprinted with Emily, and Leah was left alone and heartbroken. Jacob! That could happen to us."
Jacob remained silent for a moment, but there wasn't anything he could say that would alleviate the panic was I feeling. Finally, he spoke in a firm voice.
"Impossible. I'll always love you," he told me. "For the rest of my life. Even if I never would have had my chance with you…if he never would have left you. I still would have felt this way until I died. I only see you, Bella!"
I just shook my head, speechless, as my eyes spilled over again and again. He grabbed my upper arms and shook me. My ears buzzed, and it took me several seconds to realize that he was shouting at me.
"Bella? Bella! Listen to me…I love you! You have to believe me. I've waited so long for you…you have no idea…" Suddenly, his hands were on my cheeks, warming my tear-cooled skin and wiping the water from my face. His expression was desperate, and he finally leapt at me, kissing me full on the mouth. His panic and his overwhelming love were evident, and it broke me from my spell.
I grabbed his hair roughly, pulling his face even closer to mine and wishing we could meld together. We held each other impossibly tight, until I had to break away to draw a ragged breath. His hands groped down my back and squeezed my rear, and I gasped through my still-falling tears and fisted his shirt to bring him to my lips once more. He eased me down onto my back and stretched atop me, supporting most of his own weight. We tangled together, kissing fiercely. My legs wrapped around him roughly and his hands burnt me deliciously as they rubbed and squeezed from my back to my thighs.
I was angry. Not at Jacob, but at the circumstances that always seemed to keep happiness an arm's length away for me. I didn't doubt Jacob's feelings for me, but now I had no choice but to doubt what fate might have planned for us. I was also scared. I didn't think I could handle losing him too. He was the only part of my life that kept me sane after Edward broke my heart. And now he was my life and my heart.
I pulled away from him abruptly. I felt the need to tell Jacob exactly what I was thinking. He hovered a few inches from my face, looking troubled, even as his eyes were dark with desire.
"Jacob," I said firmly, with gravity. "I love you. It's taken me a long time to get to where I am, and you're the reason I'm here. I'm not just going to give you up — to give up on us because of some stupid wolfy superstition." I cradled his face in my hands, leaning in until my lips were nearly brushing his. "So fate can do whatever it wants, but I'm telling you that I'm not giving up."
I kissed him, and when I broke from his mouth to nuzzle his jawline with my nose, he breathed, "I don't want you to give up, Bella. I'm here…I'm staying here with you. I'm not giving up either. We can tell fate to go screw if it has other plans for us!"
I laughed throatily, feeling a thrill of panic and rebelliousness as Jacob trailed soft kisses around my ear. My despair faded but the fear was still there. It was me and Jacob against the world, and it was exhilarating and terrifying.
**
Sunday night, well-rested and surprisingly cheerful considering the stress hanging over our heads, Jacob and I arrived in a large clearing several miles away from La Push. Sam wanted to practice some strategic sparring, and needed the space for the ten wolves to do it, away from the eyes of the unaware members of the reservation. Walking into the field, I was immediately reminded of a vampire baseball game, one year earlier. The thought made a small smile come to my face, but no pain arose in my heart. I laced my fingers through Jacob's as we approached the pack, standing around in their human forms. I saw Leah standing off a bit, by herself, and I felt a flood of pity for her. The fear that had been dormant since Saturday afternoon prickled my heart a bit. Could the same fate she suffered happen to me?
"Bella," Sam nodded at me, his gaze flickering to Jacob quickly. Jacob nodded tersely, and Sam relaxed. "Emily and Kim are over between those trees if you'd like to join them."
"Sure, sure," I said, giving Jacob a quick peck on the cheek as he chuckled lowly.
As I walked away, I heard Jared whisper, "Did you tell her, man?" Jacob's low voice murmured something I couldn't hear, but I couldn't resist turning my head and meeting his eyes. He beamed at me and I blew him a kiss. We were a united front.
Emily and Kim were whispering and giggling, and when I walked up they turned red and fell silent.
"What?" I asked. "Were you talking about me?"
Kim burst into nervous giggles. Emily's eyes were kind. "No, don't worry Bella," Emily said. "We were just having a personal discussion." Kim giggled again, her cheeks pink. "We were discussing what it's like to, uh, be with our wolves. Kim is new to the experience, so I was trying to give her some advice."
Be with the wolves? I had no idea what she was talking about until Kim brazenly asked, "So, you and Jacob haven't had sex yet, right?"
"Excuse me?" I spluttered, shocked. My face took on its usual shade of crimson.
"Oh, sorry…I didn't mean to embarrass you," Kim said, apologetically. "I didn't think you had, but I didn't want to assume. It's just…it's so different than I thought being with someone could be. Better, in a lot of ways, but overwhelming in others. I have so many questions for Emily…I hope you don't mind, Bella."
"No, it's fine," I said quickly, turning to watch the pack as they started phasing and preparing for their battle practice. But soon I found myself eavesdropping on Emily and Kim, and before long I was sitting cross-legged with them, enthralled with what Emily had to say.
"It's such an intense experience," Emily explained. "More so than with a human man. Sam gives himself over to his instincts, and the whole experience is very animalistic, but at the same time, it's with so much love and devotion."
"Does he ever hurt you when he's…um, caught up in his instincts?" I asked. "Because Jacob…" I stopped myself, horrified at what I was about to share. That was between Jacob and me. At least I thought it was, until Emily patted my arm.
"I know, I heard," she said sympathetically. "He gets rough when he orgasms…he loses control a bit, correct?"
"How did you…" I stammered, before remembering — nothing was secret in the pack.
"The first time Jared came when I was giving him a blowjob, I thought he'd stab me through the head with his dick," Kim said laughing. "I was terrified! I had never even done that before, and I thought I was going to die."
"It gets easier," Emily said gently. "They learn to control themselves through practice. It's best to just brace yourself when you know it's close. They'll never hurt you deliberately…" Her voice trailed off, and her scars seemed to shine in the scarce moonlight.
"But when they do finally reign in all that wolf aggression, it is incredible!" Kim exclaimed. "Jared is so generous, and seems to anticipate every need I have. And he's so warm and muscled and…big! I can't count all of the orgasms I have!"
"Are you and Jacob thinking about having sex, Bella?" Emily asked. "I know you've done some other things, but if you're thinking about it, I might be able to help prepare you for what it might be like."
I looked at Emily and Kim, their smiles so genuine. They had a lot to be happy about. Their wolf men had imprinted them…they were linked for eternity. As much as I needed advice, my situation was different from theirs. Me and Jacob against the world, I thought.
"Please don't take this the wrong way, Emily…Kim," I started. "But when it's time for me and Jake, I think we'd both feel more comfortable if we figured it out together."
Kim shrugged her shoulders and Emily just squeezed my hand understandingly. We fell silent, our gazes fixed on our wolves.
I must have dozed off, because the next thing I knew, Jacob was gently shaking me awake.
"Bella, honey? It's time to go home."
I sat up to see the wolves phased back into their human forms, still milling about and chatting. Jared and Kim were kissing and Sam stroked Emily's hair. I held out my hands so Jacob could pull me to my feet, and he wrapped his arms around my chilled arms. I hadn't realized how cold I had been curled up on a blanket on the grass.
"You okay?" he said lowly. I nodded, kissing his bare chest. "Well, then…let's get you home before Charlie wakes…" His words stopped abruptly with a choking gurgle. All around us, heads snapped up, furious growls sounding in the chests of the wolves. Many of them began trembling and Jacob roughly pushed me several feet from him, and I stumbled back and landed on my rear. He hissed "they're here!" before exploding into a mass of fur and muscle. My russet wolf landed in front of me, shielding me from the line of trees with his body.
Terrified, I looked around to see that I was in the middle of a semi-circle of massive wolves, Emily and Kim at my sides. They were clutching at me, fear in their eyes. No! This isn't the way Alice said it would be!
The growls intensified and I turned to the tree line to see several black shadows moving toward us stealthily. The battle was about to begin, whether we were ready for it or not.
**
END NOTES: Please check out my one-shot, "Work of Art!"
