Alrighty. I apologize for those of you who are looking at the chapter name going "Part one… whaaa…?" But I just HAD to split this into two parts… you'll see why once you read the last line- NO PEAKING!!!- Anyway, I hope you enjoy. 'Cause I'm supposed to be asleep right now… EOGs and all are tomorrow… ANYWAY I do hope you enjoy and PLEASE REVIEW. I hate story murderers… they make me wanna cry…

Ya… okay… well I don't own Twilight… for some reason Santa never gets all the things on my wish list. He always forgets "the rights to Twilight" and "Really hot blonde werewolf named Seth." I don't know why…

ENJOY!

A good start to a bad week (day 6) PART ONE

I wake up to a buzzing sound then "This is how we live, this is how we live. Ripped jeans and all. This is how we live, this is what we live for."

"Ugh!" I groan stuffing the phone under my pillow. "Go away, Bri!" I yell into the pillow. There's a groan from my left as Seth stirs awake. "Go back to sleep Seth, it's only…" I check the clock. "Seven." I ruffle his hair before kissing his cheek. "Just go back to sleep."

"You should answer that." He says not fully awake. "It's not smart to fight with your siblings." He tells me with a half-hearted smile. "Go ahead. Answer the blasted thing. We're both already up."

"Fine. But you owe me if I get fussed out."

"Maybe she just wants to talk." He offers.

"You do realize we're talking about Bri right?" I ask him as I open my phone. "Hello?"

"Hey."

We're both quite for a minute. "look, it was stupid of me to say those things to you. I didn't mean it. I was just pissed because… I don't even know. I've just been pissed a lot lately. Is that normal?"

"Yes. Very." I tell her.

"Well, I don't really know what I'm expecting. I know you're not coming back to the pack."

"What do you mean the pack? You say that like it's a them vs. us situation."

"I mean that- I don't mean anything I just… I thought you should know I didn't mean half the stuff I said. You're my sister and I love you."

"But?"

"But I also love Paul. He- he's changed. He's sweet. I like him, Kait. I like him a lot. I want you to respect that." She tells me in an even tone.

"Aye, it's none of my business. You do what you wish." I tell her.

"I just- do you love Seth?" I gape at my phone. I stand up and walk out in the hall where Seth can't hear me. "Kait?"

"Ya?" I ask.

"Do you love Seth? I've seen the way he looks at you… and…"

"And what?" I ask confused.

"Do you love him?"

"I don't know. I'm not sure I even know what love is."

"You are the only person I know scared of a principal. I mean, it's an emotion. How can you be so frightened by it, Kait?" She prods.

"No. I guess I don't then. I'm not scared. I'm not scared of anything, Bri." I lie.

"You love him. You do."

"No I don't. I don't love anyone. Love is a sick idea that just gets people hurt." I tell her.

"What about me?" She ask.

"You're my sister. I care about you…" I don't know how to finish my sentence.

"But you're a scared little girl when it comes to commitment." She counters.

"I'm not scared, Bri. I'm just- I don't confide in people. Does that make me scared?" I ask her, my temper rising.

"I'm not trying to piss you off, I'm just sayin'- I'm just sayin' that that boy cares about you. I care about you. I just want you to know your treading in dangerous waters if you don't care about him-"

"I do care about Seth." I growl.

"If you don't care about him the same way he does about you… things can't end well Kait."

"What do you know about relationships?" I ask her.

"I've learned through other's mistakes. Maybe you should learn too?"

"I've got everything under control, and hey, you've got enough to deal with." I say in an easy tone. "Don't worry about me. I'm fine." I pause for a second, "Look, Bri, I'm sorry about before. We could've handled that better… being a werewolf just makes things complicated. I shouldn't have pissed you off like that. I don't care who you date, werewolf or not. If you say Paul's changed… I believe you. And tell mom I'm fine. If she needs me she can call, I don't know when I'll be back…"

"Okay."

"And Bri?"

"Ya?"

"Good luck." I tell her.

"With what?"

"You'll figure it out later." I smile to myself.

"Whatever you say, Kaitlyn. I'll see you later."

"Same." With that I hang up and walk back into Seth's room. "One problem down. Now I'll I have left is vampires, and there's no way they can be more difficult then a PMSing teenage werewolf." I give him an easy grin feeling all of the stress from earlier this week melt away.

"Did you mean what you said?" Seth ask solemnly.

"What do you mean?" I give a crooked grin as I climb back onto the bed.

"That you don't love me. And it's not because you're scared." He meets my eyes and his normally shinning blue eyes are empty. I've only seen that look about two other time. Both were my doing. They both followed me saying something pertaining to our future. Where we stand.

"Seth, I didn't-"

"Yes or no, Kaitlyn?" He ask his voice emotionless.

"Seth, I care about you…"

"Am I wasting my time?" He ask in a quite voice.

"Seth…"

"Don't say my name like that." He begs.

"Like what?" I snap.

"Like you pity me." He jerks his head back at me and stares at my eyes. After a minutes he slowly turns away and looks out his bedroom window. "I need to tell you something." He pauses. "But, I don't want it to effect your answer. So please tell me. Yes or no?" He looks at me again.

"I'm not good for you." I tell him.

"That wasn't an answer choice." He replies.

"I know that. Seth, I care about you- more then I've ever cared about anything in my entire life-"

"But?"

"But, I care. And that's the problem. I care too much to allow myself to feel the way that I want to, because I know that I'll hurt you. I've been lying to myself. I keep telling myself, and you, that you're going to hurt me. But the truth is, I'm going to end up hurting you, Seth."

"Oh Kait, you could never hurt me." Seth says softly.

"But I already have. Like just now, and that day in the woods. I can cut you deeper then you've ever been hurt, Seth. I can- and probably will- say things that will do just that. You need someone who is stable. Someone you can depend on- I can never be that person Seth. I'm afraid, I'm too self-absorbed to truly care about anyone enough to not hurt them."

"Kait. You wouldn't hurt me though." He gives me a sheepish grin.

"How do you know that? I've torn my family apart just to escape my own problems. What if me and you get into a fight? I run from conflict. I'm only gonna break your heart, Seth."

"Exactly. Your only gonna break my heart. Because only you have my heart. No one else can hurt me the way you can, because no one else can make me feel the way you do. Kaitlyn Murrauy, you are the only person in the world that I've ever felt this way about, and you are the only person I'll ever love the way I love you."

"What are you trying to say, Seth?" I ask in a desperate attempt to get a hold on the situation before the words in my throat come out my mouth.

"I love you. I know they say people as young as us can't feel love. We can't tell strong emotions from hormones… but I can remember the exact second I fell for you."

"And when was that?" I ask breathless. NO KAIT! NO! The voice inside my head screams. If he tells you, there's no going back. You're done for. You're his and you know it. You're two seconds from saying I love you

"You were-"

"This can't be the real world now."

Me and Seth both stare at the phone. Jake. "Something's wrong. He wouldn't call at seven just to ask 'what's up?'." I tell Seth.

"You're right." Seth says sounding beaten.

"I don't believe it-"

"Hello?" Seth ask looking really pissed off. "This better be important Jake." Seth growls.

"Why were you two having sex or something?" Jake ask sounding just as pissed off as Seth- if that's even possible.

"No we were not having sex. Now what the hell are you calling about at seven in the morning?" Seth gets off the bed and starts pacing.

"There was a killing in Los Angeles. The clans ahead of schedule.