Chapter 38

B's pov

Facing the Past Alone!

"Bella? Bella! Wake-up! Baby please! Wake-up!" Edward's voice reached my ears.

As he asked, my eyes fluttered open. His bright emerald green eyes shined with relief. "Edward?" I asked rubbing my forehead.

He sighed pressing his lips tenderly to my forehead. "Thank god! You nearly gave me a heart attack!" he said tears coating his voice.

I realized I was in a beach towel, in his lap, on the bathroom floor. My hair was soaking wet and was matted to my face and neck. "What happened?" I asked gripping the towel to me more tightly.

"You nearly gave me a heart attack, that's what happened!" his voice was shrill.

I sighed looking into his tear filled eyes. "I'm sorry." I whispered softly stroking his hair. "Why am I on the bathroom floor in a beach towel?"

"I woke up. You were asleep in the shower! Just curled up in a fatal position! I thought you were dead! God, no! Don't ever do that to me again!" he squeezed me closer to him. "Never again!"

I smiled and ran my hand through his natural just-rolled-out-of-bed hair. He pressed his forehead to mine with his eyes closed. "I'm sorry." I whispered new tears rolling down my cheeks. "I am so sorry," I wanted to say more, but what I had in mind would just cause problems.

A few minutes later, his warm gentle hands ran across my cheeks, wiping all traces of my tears away. "Everything is going to be fine for now on, ok? I promise!" I nodded hugging his torso close to me. "Get dressed and then we'll leave." I nodded in agreement, then he gently pulled me from his lap and placed me on the toilet. "I'll get dressed out here. When your done, just knock on the door." Then with one last parting glance, he walked out the bathroom and closed the door behind him. I sighed out of relief. Relief that my dream, nightmare, wasn't true. Relief that I didn't have to worry about losing Edward or Alex being back in my life!

Quickly, I pulled on my white skinny jeans, a black Tripp hoodie/shirt, and my black and white Converse. Blew my hair dry, brushed it up into a messy bun and then knocked on the door.

"You're good!" his warm voice came through the door.

I smiled smally and opened the door. "So, you ready?" I asked running my eyes over his body. Black tight fitting t-shirt, light blue jeans that hung loosely on his hipbones, and black Nike's with a white check mark.

Just as I looked up, his eyes flew up from my legs. I blushed, he chuckled. "Yep! Where do you wanna start?" he asked once we were in the elevator by ourselves.

I thought about that for a minute. I wanted him to know all of me. Not just the bad things. "Mmm...lets go to my old high school." I suggested easing myself into the passenger seat on the rental black Volvo. He quirked an eyebrow. "I wanna start off easy. Plus..." I slipped my hand into his that was resting on the console between us, "I want you to get to know all of me! Not just the bad."

he smirked. "You mean to tell me there is some food time in your old life?" I grinned as he joked, lightening my mood very much.

Once at the high school, I told him to park in the visitors parking lot. He looked confused. "We started our Spring Break a week before theirs the students are still here!" he grinned back, grabbing my hand and we made our way to the front office.

The cool, air-conditioned room was full of more than twenty people. Seven of which were teachers and staff. The rest were students. I recognized a few; Jane Call and her boyfriend, Alec Eves, were sulking in chairs on the far side of the room. Jane's hair was slightly disarray and her lip was busted. Alec was no better. A busted lip and a dark bruise appearing on his left jaw line. They're hands were clasped tightly together, almost as if holding each other in place. On the other side of the room, sat another couple I was, unfortunately, familiar with; Bree Heights and her boyfriend, Demetri Gray. I suppressed the urge to bust out laughing at the realization. Jane and Alec had gotten into a fight with Bree and Demetri, and by the looks of it Jane and Alec won!

"You wanna sit down?" Edward whispered to me, cutting my thought off quickly.

I shrugged. "Sure. I think you'll be over joyed to hear what happened between these four!" I laughed pulling him to the seats beside Jane. "Hey Janie. Sup Al!"

They both turned to me, eyes wide. I was the only one allowed to call them that! Alec's cute face broke into a huge smile. Jane was still roaming my face with her beautiful bright baby blue eyes. Finally, she leans over and hugs me real tight. "Bella! I missed you!"

I smiled hugging her back. "I missed you guys too!" We pulled away smiling. She wince at the pain of her busted lip. "By the way...who won?" I asked nodding to Heights and Gray.

Alec snorted at my question. "Have you seen their faces? We did! Of course!" He shrugged. "Besides, Demetri can't catch me, because I don't wear clothes that scream Fuck me! I'm desperate!" he said loud enough for Bree and Demetri to hear. They glowered. We laughed.

Edward's hand found its way back to mine, sending electrical sparks everywhere, and reminding me of his presence. "Oh! Jane, Alec, this is my...friend, Edward. Edward this is Jane, one of my first babysitting jobs, and her boyfriend, Alec, my third tutor job!"

Jane's eyes grew wide as she gave Edward a once over. I grinned knowing that look anywhere! Wow! She mouthed looking quickly again. I know right! I mouthed back slapping a high five with her! The guys were watching us with amused expressions on their faces.

"Uh-oh! Bells, you might wanna hid you boy..." Alec muttered loud enough that Edward heard. Alec wasn't looking at him, but at Bree.

Her snake eyes traveled the length of Edward's body, licking her lips before getting up and making her way to us.

"Shit..." I muttered turning to Edward, who looked positively freaked out! "This might get weird...so just play along!" I rushed pulling him closer to me, his arm around my waist. I ignored the tremble worthy vibe that rolled off me, as I lifted my head of his shoulder; kissing his jaw softly. I felt his skin pull under my lips, he was smiling. He pulled me closer, my back into his chest.

"Hello Bella!" Bree said fakely as she reached us. "I didn't see you come in!" When she smiled, you could see where her teeth had gone through her bottom lip. Gross!

I smiled just as fakely as she did. "Oh hey Bree! How you been?"

The smile dropped from her face quickly. "Cut the shit, Dwyer." I flinched from the name. "We all know what game you're playing at!" her eyes flickered to Edward. "How much did she pay you?" Ouch! Edward didn't say anything, but his face showed confusion. "Come on! Why would someone like you, be with someone like her!?" Double ouch!

Edward's arms tightened on my waist, silently telling me he thought differently. I smiled inside. "I don't know who you are, what you think you know, or why you think that!" his voice was cold and harsh. "But Bella is the most beautiful, caring, selfless, kind, brave, person I know! She hasn't paid me a damn thing for me to be with her! And even if she did, I would rather be with her than a girl who already has a boyfriend, but is still hitting on another guy!" he looked down at me. "I'm sure I'm not the first?" I nodded slowly, still in shock about what he had just said.

Bree's eyes were wide and her jaw was hanging open. She composed herself. "So you're telling me, that you don't care that she willingly had sex with her step-dad, her boyfriend, and her boyfriend's friend?" I gasped looking at her. How the hell did she find out about that? "Alex has a serious babbled problem when he has sex!" she smirked evilly at me, before returning her gazed back to Edward.

Edward glared at her, and I was sure, if she were a guy, she would not be standing. "You don't know what the fuck you're talking about! So do yourself a favor, turn around, walk away and don't ever approach me or my Bella again!"

She stood there for a moment, not talking. Jane and Alec were fighting to keep from laughing; though a human being has only so much control. Finally, Bree flipped her fake platinum blonde hair, huffed, turned on her heel and muttered "Whatever!" and stalked back to her seat!

Jane smiled fakely. "Translation:" her voice was very high pitched and nasally, "i have no better come back, so I'm just going to walk away!"

I laughed high-fiving her! "Great job on her face too! Her dad is going to be pissed! You broke her birthday present!" We cracked up, holding our sides. Speaking of which, I looked down at mine. Edwards arm still lay on my waist, his head on my shoulder. I smiled and placed my hand on top of his. His eyes met mine, an unknown emotion mixing with his iris'.

"Jane, Alec, Bree and Demetri?" We all looked up at the receptionist, Mrs. Shell. "The vice principal will speak to you now."

Bree huffed and stalked along with Demetri, into Mr. Gate's office. Jane laughed, getting up and grabbing Alec's hand. "Good seeing you again, Bella! Go by my locker and slip your number inside, will you?" I smiled and nodded. They walked inside, shutting the office door with a timid click.

"What can I help you with today?" Mrs. Shell asked lifting her young face to us. Her eyes widened when they met mine.

"Hey Teresa, how's it going?" I asked pulling away from Edward's embrace, but not for long. I gripped his hand in mine as we made our way to the front desk.

Her eyes watered. "Fine. I'm fine. I visit your mother's grave everyday. The flowers die real fast."

I shrugged. "She's evil. I'd want to die if I had around her, too!"

Teresa pulled out a tissue, wiping her eyes and nose. "You deserve your time to be angry and grieve, but one day you'll need to forgive. You'll need to forgive her, to live."

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. "Can we have visitors pass, please?"

She nodded her eyes flashing to Edward. "Who's he?" she pulled out two stickers for me and him. She wrote my name: Bella Swan.

"This is my...friend from Forks, Washington. Edward this is Renee's sister, Teresa. Teresa, this is Edward Cullen."

She smiled, he nodded. I think he felt the tension in the air between us. "Here you are. Bella, you know not to disturb classes. Have fun!"

I nodded and pulled Edward out the office and into the hall. "Sorry about that! Teresa thinks Renee wasn't right in the head. That Renee wasn't the woman that she was when she died. I, of course, disagree. It brings problems to that side of the family."

He nodded sticking the sticker on her chest. I sighed and rolled my eyes. "What?" he asked. I just snatched the sticker off chest and pressed it to his jeans. I had mine in the same spot. "Did that have to be there?" He asked lacing our fingers once more.

I shrugged and started walking. "Yeah! With me, you can't be all stressed! You're seventeen! Live s little!"

He sighed. "I can't live without knowing that you're not living right along with me." My insides just turned into bright pink jell-o!! "I'll sit on the sidelines with you. I won't leave you alone. You won't have to face this alone..."

I felt my vision start to blur, before it even did, blinking back the tears as fast as I could, I continued down the hall.

"That's my ninth grade locker." I pointed to locker number 342. "I had a lot of enemies that year..." I said tracing the engraved words, hateful words, in the dull silver paint.

Edward looked over the words: Freak! Slut! Whore! Bitch! Dick Magnet! Geek! Loser! I saw him eyeing the last words, or paragraph:

You're ugly, prude and a whore! Why do you continue living? Do everyone a favor, and die!

His jaw clenched and his eyes turned to slits. "Who wrote that?" he asked his voice quavering.

"Uh...Alex and Damien," I replied shyly. "That was before I agreed to go out with him. I didn't know it was him at the time. He told me once...when he was....well you know. Alex wrote the first part. He is so stupid! That insult doesn't even make any since!" I pulled us father along the hall. Pointing out classes, lockers, and corners where big events had taken place. "Me and Tina got into our first fight of high school right here," I said standing beside a corner not far from the teachers lounge. "We were fighting that Bree girl and her best friend Melissa!" I chuckled moving down a few lockers. "When Melissa ducked from one of Tina's punches, this came about!" I said pointing to a huge dent in the middle of the locker. "Come on, I want you to meet my ultimate favorite teacher then we'll go!" I pulled him to a familiar door.

Mr. T sat at his desk, watching the silent class before him. His scruffy white beard hung nearly four inches longer than it did before I left. I recognized his signature bored move; he'd sigh, place is hands in his lap, clasp them together, and twiddle his thumbs. I smiled, tapped on the glass twice with my fingernail, and then popped my head in the classroom. "Can I help you?" Mr. T's old gruff voice asked looking perplexed.

I smiled stepping into the classroom all together, ignoring Edward's warning about disrupting the class. "Hey Mr. T. How have you been?"

"Well, if it isn't my favorite student, Isabella Swan!" he said gleefully. I smiled and nodded to him. "How have you been? How's Washington been treating you?"

"Good. Better than before...what test are they taking?"

"SAT's! You know how much fun those are!" his sarcastic remark made a few near-by students giggle. "Who's the young man behind you?"

I blushed pulling Edward forward with a small tug. "This is my...friend Edward. Mr. Toulouse, Edward Cullen. Edward, Mr. T!" I heard multiple gasps and a saw a few flashes and phones being snapped out. I grinned. Edward was gorgeous! Anyone could see that! Now more than half the school, was going to have a picture of this god on their phones.

A few minutes later, a blonde with bright green eyes came up with her test. She stopped by Edward, place a small piece of paper in his hand. I bit my lip as she sashayed her hips back to her seat. A few of her friends snickered along with her. Edward's hand gripped mine tighter. I grinned, thinking of ways to make her jealous...

"So, how's the wife?" I asked leaning more into Edward. A few more gasps and pictures.

"Good. She's good! She finally stopped smoking. So now she can hold little Bianca all she wants!" his eyes shined with love for his girls. "She loves being a mom! Absolutely adores it!"

I smiled. "And how's little Mickey?"

Mr. T sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "He...uh...um...well he moved out of the house."

I was confused. "But he's my age! He's seventeen! He's not supposed to move out yet!"

Tears shined in Mr. T's eyes and I knew his son did not move out on purpose. He sighed deeply. "Bella, Lil Mickey was in a car accident six months ago. A drunk driver hit them on the side. They spun out, Lil Mickey lost control of the car, and flipped until they hit the guard rail, and landed in the ditch! Kaley had memory loss. She remembered that Lil Mick was her long time boyfriend, where they were going, that they had gotten into a accident, and that her name was Kaley Brandon. She can't remember anything before the accident, except for those few things."

Edward wrapped his arms around my waist as tears fell down my cheeks. "I'm so sorry." I whispered wishing I could comfort him in some way. "Your son is an amazing man. He'll be with you forever." I felt Edward's lips kiss my head. I sighed breaking from his arms. Taking a deep breath, I quickly wrapped my arms around my previous teary eyed language arts teacher. Nothing. I sighed, choking a laugh through my tears. "I'm sorry for your lose, Mr. T. You were there for me, but I wasn't here when you needed it."

"That's alright Bella." The old teacher said gruffly. "Glad to see you're feeling better."

I pulled back from the hug. "You have no idea." I turned to his class. "You guys have an amazing teacher! So don't waste your time this year ignoring him! Cause come next year, you guys are going to be begging to be back in his class!" I looked pointedly at the blonde and her friends. "I'll let yo get back to your testing. I have other places to visit."

I entwined my fingers with Edward's once again. He smiled and brought our hands to his lips, kissing the back of mine sweetly. I heard a huff come from the students. I giggled a little. "Lets get out of here," he whispered. I nodded giving Mr. Toulouse one last parting glance.

Once back in the car, I burst into tears. Edward held me as much as he could over the middle console. I cried for Mr. and Mrs. T, for Bianca, for Kaley, for Lil Mickey. I cried for my Aunt Teresa, for her side of the family, and finally I cried for myself. For all that I have to deal with. For all I had dealt with. For all everything I was going to have to deal with!

After I had reduced my sobs to little sniffles, I didn't move from his chest. "You wanna take a break? Go get some lunch?" he asked quietly his lips brushing my head.

"Yeah," I whispered. Neither of us moved from our spots. I didn't want to. In fact, if I had my way, this friggin' middle console would be in the backseat, and I could lay my head in his lap!

I sighed, feeling my stomach growl. I pulled away from his embrace and lightly kissed his cheek. "Thank you, Edward."

His lips pulled into a crooked smile. "Where to?" he said pulling out the parking lot.

I thought for a moment. "Uhm...take a right," he turned and we were faced with a long paved road, with houses on one side and the schools' football, baseball, and soccer field on the other. "Go straight til I can think of a place..." he nodded and continued driving. I didn't want to get fast-food, so all the local stuff went out the window. I didn't want to run into old enemies, so that left out the places near my old house. What about that cafe that I worked by? I thought to myself. Not that close to home, not many people would go to a cafe for lunch, when there's a McDonald's right beside it... "Ok, take a left at the next chance."

He nodded. "Can I know where we're going?"

"I used to work at Barnes 'N' Nobles. A small cafe was a few miles away from it." I licked my lips. "If I remember correctly, they have the best croissants!" I smiled. "Yeah! That's were we're going. Take a left..."

A few turns and a little more reminiscing about my past, we pulled up to The Java Cup cafe. The parking lot was fairly empty, a few I recognized. A large motorcycle sitting on the side gave me a small smile. "Looks like someone likes this place too."

We walked in hand-in-hand. The first thing my eyes met, made my blood start to boil! Damien Carlson. Talking to my sister! She looked petrified! Jacob was no where to be seen. "Shit..." I muttered loud enough for Edward to hear me.

"What?" he asked following my eyes. "You know him?"

"Unfortunately. Call Jake. I'll handle this!" I stalked off to where Amber was sitting, without another word. "HEY!" I called at them. Amber jumped and Damien smiled at me. "Get away from her! NOW!"

He smiled wider. "Or what? You'll get your boyfriend over there to hurt me?" he nodded to Edward behind me.

I shook my head. "No, I deal with my own problems. He can have you when I'm done." With that, I picked a near-by plate and slammed it into his face. The glass shattered on impact, splattering his his face and hair with cranberries, bread and whipped cream. "Now. Get. Away. From. My. Sister!" I chucked more food filled plates, bowls, platters, and cups at him in-between words.

"Bella! That's enough!" Edward's arms wrapped around me, binding my arms to my sides. "That's enough!" He whispered to me, pressing his lips to my cheek. "Calm done!" I huffed in defiance. He chuckled, then let me go. I tried not to pout. "You. I don't know you, but Bella feels threatened and that pisses me off!" His voice was cold and sharp as ice.

I made my way to, a now, giggling Amber. "You ok?" she nodded pointing to his face. "I know, great right arm, huh?" she and I laughed together.

"Now go! Before I do something I'll regret later!" Jake's loud yelling cut through our laughter. We both looked up at him. He had Damien up by the neck of his shirt, against the wall, and looking down at Jake eyes wide and fearful. As soon as Jake dropped him, he ran as if hells hounds were on his heels, out the cafe and to his silver Chevy truck.

We adverted our eyes from his retreating truck and looked at Jake, who's eyes had turned soft as he stared at his girlfriend. "Baby, I am so sorry..." he sighed coming and sitting in front of her, on his knees. His eyes shining with his unconditional love for her.

I turned, feeling like I was intruding on their moment. Edward must have felt the same, because he was suddenly at my side, baring two menus and a waiter to show us our table. I nodded and quickly followed him. "Thank you, I felt as if I was in the middle of their love moments!"

He chuckled and sat in the same booth as I did. I smiled and sat close to him.

"Can I get your drinks?" the male waiter asked pulling out his pad and stared straight at my chest.

I shuddered and moved closer to Edward. He looked confused, I saw his eyes follow my small flicker to the guy staring, nearly drooling, at the sight of my chest.

Then he tensed up, I could feel every single muscle in his upper body go ridged. His arms wrapped around my waist possessively, I held my smile, and rested his chin on my shoulder.

"I-I"ll have a Dr. Pepper." I said timidly.

"Same," he spat at the creepy waiter. The guy nodded before winking at me and turning on his heels.

I let out a deep gust of air, I didn't realize I was holding. Then snuggled deeper into Edward's side. "Thank you," I sighed once more putting my arms over his.

He chuckled softly rubbing small circles on my stomach. "He's an asshole. And he can't get none cause of it!"

I gasped and smacked his bicep. "Edward Anthony Cullen!"

He smiled sheepishly. "I got to stop hanging out with Emmett so much, huh?"

"Yeah! Good idea!" I smiled giggling softly.

His eyes grew darker, he leaned forward. "So beautiful..." he whispered.

I did a quick glance at his lips before licking mine. "Not really..." I whispered back, our lips centimeters apart...

"Here are your drinks." We both pulled away.

Damn it! I silently seethed taking a huge swig of Dr. Pepper. First Alice, now this creepy guy that obviously has problems understanding that a girl was taken... I glared at the asshole before me. "I'll have a chicken filled croissant." I said icily. The guy, Matt so his name tag said so, didn't hear the icy tone I had used in my voice.

"Um...how is that?" Edward asked looking confused and lost.

I smiled. "He'll have the same!"

thankfully he left, but not before winking at me, and letting his eyes roam over my body, I guess it was supposed to be seductive.

I shuddered again, hating it that I could stand up for Amber, but not myself. That's pretty messed up!

"What up with the frown?" He finger lingering on my bottom lip.

I exhaled slowly, enjoying the shiver that ran through his body. "Just thinking how I could stand up for Amber but not myself." I said my lips still attached to his finger.

He smiled. "I'll protect you...always." he whispered sweetly, before kissing my forehead. I smiled, gently pressing my lips to his neck. His grip on my waist tightened. "Bella..." his voice was more of a warning than anything.

"Your plates..." Matt was back.

But I didn't move to look up at him. I was safe in Edwards arms. I was safe from the world. I was happy here. I was lov- no! Not here! I wasn't loved here! Not like that! I thought curtly, cutting off the thought that usually strengthen my days. I pulled away abruptly, ignoring the hurt that shot across his face and the pain that shot down to my heart!

"Food..." I breathed, almost salivating at the sight of the large croissant.

Edward wasn't as exuberant as I was, he was more...hesitant than anything. Staring at the breaded treat with apprehension.

I smiled and took his croissant into my hands and held it to his mouth. "Open," he looked puzzled before shocked,but still didn't open his mouth. "Open your mouth," he still looked skeptical, but opened his mouth all the same. His lips were wet and and his warm breath was blowing in my face. I clamped my mouth shut, holding myself still so I wouldn't jump him. Slowly, I pushed a small piece of the food into his hot mouth. He chewed and closed his eyes. I watched as he swallowed and his adams-apple bobbed up and then down. "Well...?" I asked placing the chicken filled croissant on his plate.

His eyes flashed open. I bit my lip to hold in the whimper daring to come out. His iris' were dark forest with golden specks. "Oh wow!" he groaned licking his lips hungrily.

I smiled. "Good huh? Told you so!" I said picking up my own and shoving a large piece into my awaiting mouth. The warm cream floated down to my tongue and tickled my taste-buds. I closed my eyes and moaned deeply. I couldn't help it! They're just too good! I swallowed and let my eyes open.

Edward stared at me with a hungry painful expression. "Uh-I um...d-dead puppies!" he blurted turning bright pink.

I put a hand over my mouth. "D-dead pup-pies? Why are you screaming out random things?" I laughed hard.

He looked relaxed. "Nothing! Just a random moment for random words!" I looked at him with disbelief. "I'm serious!"

I smiled, not convinced, and pulled my Dr. Pepper closer to me. "Whatever," I said dismissively. I bit the tip of my straw and sucked the sweet bubbly soda down. Edward made a funny sound deep down inside his throat. But when I asked about it, he said something weird. Boy's are so weird! And complicated! I thought before I suggested we hurry and finish so we could finish all of this reminiscing today. And the rest of the time...we could have fun. Oh and don't forget! Work on your relationship with him! Kiss him already! I wanna have some action! My concision told me smugly. I rolled my eyes and continued eating, though did wander what I would do to kiss him...!

Ok, so it wasn't as long as I thought it was going to be! But be happy! I have more time to type things in! My internet is back up! (WHOO! That was my happy scream!) and now I can update as much as I want! (everyone joins in a WHOOP! With me!)

review and I'll update ASAP!

Laters,

~!LifeSuxAndThenYouDie!~