Chapter 41

Jacob's POV

Cured without the dissecting!

I watched, horrified, as my girl screamed and sobbed herself into a deep depression. Her eyes remained hazy and glazed over. I could see when she was getting hit, when she was getting yelled at, when she was getting frustrated. I could tell when she was determined. When she was done.

Whenever she had collapsed I my arms, after her blood curdling scream, she continued to scream 'stop' over and over again. Occasionally, she'd choke on a 'stop' and just sob and scream wordless noise.

So I did all I could. I held her in my lap, rocking us back and forth, in the middle of the kitchen floor. My tears mixed with hers. I couldn't help being upset. Here she was, my girl, screaming, crying, and suffering for some shit I had no control over. This was all in her mind. What she was seeing, smelling, feeling, it was all in her mind. What was going on in her head was not going on around me. It was killing her, slowly and painfully.

Every so often, when she stopped screaming, I'd say little encouragements like, Amber, baby, come back to me! Please! I begged hoping she'd hear me and know that she wasn't alone in this. Please! Another time she was swallowing her screams and defeat graced her features. I wasn't having that. Come on Amber! You can fight this! I know you! I yelled at her. You're strong and brave! I placed my hands on her face, cupping her rosy wet cheeks. And so beautiful…You can do this! I promise! Now come back to me! Her face became frightened and then slowly turned to grief! Amber? Her face stayed the same for about another thirty minutes or so. When she started screaming again, I literally jumped! Amber! Please! Come to me! I cried into her shoulder. One hand held her to me, the other in her tangled hair, I tightened my grip. Amber…come back to me.

Determination settled on her face, I nearly started cheering. Instead, I gave her a pep-talk. Fight it! C'mon, Amber, baby, you can do this! Fight it! Win it! There was a brief moment were I had nearly collapsed. This takes a shit load out of you!

I watched her face, determined, scared, anger, determination…then she blinked her eyes. "Amber…?"

Am's POV

"Amber…? Baby are you ok?" he asked, his voice worried, eyes bloodshot, and face grim. "Amber?""

I swallowed thickly, I coughed and then slowly, I opened my eyes again. "Jacob?" I asked in a raspy voice. I raised my hand and cupped his cheek. "My Jake…" I whispered, softly rubbing my thumb back and forth across his cheek.

His warm hand enclosed around mine. His eyes shone, the previous fear and worry, mixed within was his love for me. I smiled and slowly mouthed, "I love you." He slowly allowed a grin to spread across his lips. "I love you too."

A few hours later

"I'm so sorry, baby," Jacob apologized again for the fifth time this hour. "I wish I could've gone with you."

I sighed impatiently as the elevator took us up to Rose and Emmet's room; Alice and Jasper were there too. I didn't know if I was able to touch anyone yet. I was scared to try it. I'd gone through all the worst stuff again today, I didn't want, nor did I need, the pain. Though, I was going to have to deal with this one way or another. "I'm fine, Jake. It was just memories!" I smiled happily when the elevator dinged. "I don't even feel him. He's gone! Completely!" I began walking towards Rose and Emmet's door. "Thank you for being there when it all happened."

I knocked on the white door that had loud music playing on the other side. There were a few disappointed grunts, but the door was soon opened by dishelmed looked Jasper; hair messed up, cheeks flushed, clothes rumpled. I giggled. "I thought this was Emmet and Rose's room. Sorry. Didn't mean to interrupt Alice and yours…er…alone time." I continued to giggle as his face became more and more red.

"No…no…A-Alice and I are in room 473. Emmet and Rosalie were blaring music. We came to join and we just got done jumping and dancing around!" He almost shrieked the last part.

By this time, I was leaning against Jacob's chest laughing, while Jake had one arm holding me to him and the other balancing us both as he laughed along with me. "Oh wow! Yeah that's exactly what I needed. A good long laugh!" I said breaking away from Jake's embrace and patting Jasper's shoulder. "It's ok, Jazz. Where's Alice at?" I asked pushing past him. Jake followed still chuckling softly.

I gasped at the room's condition, Jake just busted out laughing at the mess. "Wow! You guys really know how to piss off room service!" I joked smiling brightly at a dishelmed Alice and a tipsy Rose. "What are you drinking?"

"Um -hiccup- Malibu R-rum. Why? You –hiccup- want some?" She giggled after every hiccup. I smiled and took a sip of her drink. It was tangy, like a sweet sour tang. But it smelt like twizzlers and sour skittles mixed!

I wrinkled my nose and shook my head. "Nah. I'm good. I'll stick with the wine coolers, thanks." I snatched a Smirnoff Ice Black Cherry out the fridge and slapped myself down on the couch. I popped it open, took a large swig, and leaned back.

Next thing I know, Jacob is on my right, beer in one hand and the other around my waist; pulling me into his side. And on my left, was Emmett also a beer in hand. "Never took you for a drinker," he shouted over the music.

I laughed and shook my head. "And I never took you for a guy that knew every word to Damaged." I giggled softly as he pouted.

"Hey! That song is the shit!" He defeated himself and his precious song. "Those girls and their hearts have been damaged and they need someone to understand…" his voice trailed off as he took another large gulp of his beer.

I felt Jake's chest rumble as he laughed at Emmett's childish ways. I leaned away and looked at Emmett. "Ok…truce. I'm sorry. It is a very good song." I said knowing I was kidding around. I hated that damn song. And then I gave him a big hug.

Nothing!

I sighed smiling happily. I was cured! I was done! No more nightmares! No more flashes! No more insecurity! No more weakness. I could be me! I could be who I wanted. I didn't have to hide behind baggy clothes or anything else any longer. I could hug and touch whoever I wanted! I could touch my baby boy, if I ever had one, and not be scared. I can touch Charlie now too…

"Amber? You're hugging me!" Emmett yelled surprised.

"Well thank God I'm not kissing you!" I joked pulling away. "You might've told the whole city!"

He just stared at me for a minute, before cautiously touching my forehead with the back of his unoccupied hand.

Nothing!

"Rose gives me my cell!" he hollered. She asked why handing it to him. "Something's wrong with her!" he said pointing at me.

"What is it? She's –hiccup- only had n-not even one drink." Rose asked. Alice had come and sat in front of my legs with Jasper. Just staring at nothing. Probably zoning in and out of reality…

"I touched her, she didn't freak!" Emmett said dialing 911. "She…she needs help!"

I started laughing hysterically. "What the hell Emmett?" I continued to laugh after I hung up his phone. "I came back to this hell hole for one reason; lose my memories of the past, or come to terms with them. Get cured! And I did. I am completely healed." I leaned into Jacob's arms. "And that was without some damn therapist picking at my mind; trying to dissect the problem. I mean, my mind and my problems are not friggin' frogs' people! You can't dissect a problem. You have to learn how to solve it, in order to do that you have to understand the problem. Then you fix it and then make sure its right!"

Alice looked over her shoulder, smiling brightly at me. "So you're cured now?" I smiled, nodded and snuggled closer to Jake's embrace. "Rose…do you know what this means?" She asked in a sing-song voice.

I gulped and asked Emmett. "Should I be scared?"

"Yes..."

"SHOPPING!" They both squealed loudly. The Rose hiccupped.

I groaned. "No!"

"Yes!" Alice yelled clapping her hands. "Tomorrow 8:00, we'll be at your door. You better be ready to go." She threatened menacingly. I had to go. Damn it! "What room number are you again?"

528…" I mumbled out before yawning. "I got to go say goodnight to Bella and Edward. Hopefully he won't attempt to call the police, because I really don't want to deal with this again!" I joked lightly, hugging everyone tightly.

"C'mon sleepy," Jake whispered kissing my temple. "Night guys. Ali, Rose, I'll see you girls in the morning."

"Later!" Emmett called ad Rose hiccupped loudly, making everyone laugh.

After I shut the door behind me, Jake pressed me against the wall. I gasped, surprised, as I felt every inch of his body pressed against mine. I bit my lip, hard. His eyes were filled with lust and love and, what looked like determination. Before I could ask what this was about, he softly, but firmly pressed his lips to mine.

My reaction was different than my past ones; not only did I kiss him back and put my hands in his hair. I jumped into his arms, wrapping my legs around his waist. I felt his chest vibrate as he let out a deep throated groan.

Moving my lips in synchronization with his, he pressed me harder into the wall. His arms moved from my waist to cup my butt, I felt my head become fuzzy. I broke away, breathing heavily and trembling violently throughout my entire body. "W-what brought th-this on?" I breathed as his soft talented lips traveled the length of my neck, back to my ear again and again.

"Mmmmm…" he hummed biting a certain part of my neck. I gasped tugging hard on his dark roots of hair, I felt him smile against my skin.

"W-what?" I asked again playing with the hair at the nape of his neck.

"I love you, Amber," he panted against the skin. "I love you, so fucking much!" His tongue grazed the side of my ear. I nearly passed out.

"Hmmm," I moaned pulling his lips back to mine. "I love you too, Jake." I sighed against his lips before pulling his tongue into my mouth with mine. "I love you so, so, much Jake." I pulled away from him.

His eyes searched mine deeply; I blushed, unwinding my legs from around his waist. He smirked softly kissing my lips once. "Let's go and tell Edward and Bella the news." He whispered kissing me again; even softer than before. "Then we can go to our room and continue this."

I nodded, still panting. Slowly, we detangled our fingers from each others hair. It took us about ten minutes to get to Bella and Edward's room. We kept stopping to kiss some more. Once I caught sight of Bella's door, my smile grew large. "Bella…" I whispered pulling away from Jake, ad running to it.

Without knocking, I slid my card into the slot and barged in. Bella lay on the bed, her face blood red, and her hands in Edward's naturally bed-head hair. His face was in her neck and his arms were wrapped around her waist. I got to speak to him about that… I thought running and jumping on their bed. "Sup peeps?" I squealed pulling Bella into a huge hug, before turning and pulling Edward to me and doing the same.

Thank God he didn't freak out on me I laughed and continued to talking for a little while more. I could tell that Bella and Jacob wanted to talk privately. Edward, probably seeing the same, grabbed his shoes, his card, kissed Bella's cheek and invited me to come along. I happily obliged, before kissing Jacob and hugging Bella.

"So what are we doing?" I asked walking with Edward to the elevator.

"I want something sweet. Plus Bella wanted to speak to Jacob alone." He shrugged pushing the lobby button. "So…how does it feel? Being able to touch anyone without being scared? Not being haunted anymore?"

I smiled and walked out the elevator door. "I'm totally syked! Hyper as hell! It feels awesome." I smiled for awhile, but I could feel it dropping.

"But…?"

I sighed staring at the deserts on the menu at the hotel restaurant. Chocolate Mousse, Strawberry Shortcake, Caramel tarts, cookies, pies, cakes, and treats. Jeez! We'll be here forever! I thought smiling at the thought. Do not show this to Emmett! EVER! But back to Edward's question. "…I'm terrified. Now that I'm ok with male contact, how do I protect myself? What if the only reason Jacob is with me is because of my problems? What if I'm just a charity case to him? What if I slip and mess everything? What is…?" I let the thought trail off. What if Jacob doesn't love me the way I love him?

"Amber breath," Edward ordered softly. "Jacob loves you so much. He went through the torture of watching you go through your torture. He loves you. You guys orbit around each other for crying out loud! He moves one way and you move, and you, unconsciously, move the same." He chuckled lowly. "Its pretty creepy. But besides that, he loves you, more than you know. Trust me."

I nodded, suddenly feeling really stupid. "Thanks Edward, I needed that." I understood now; Jacob wouldn't say he loved me and not mean it. He loved me and I loved him. But…what if I'm holding him back? I shook the thought away and decided to change the subject. "Oh by the way, what was going on between you and my sister before we came in?" I watched as his cheeks turned a bright pink. "Did Edward Cullen just blush?" I teased innocently. "Now I really want to know what was going on!"

"Shut up!" he muttered ordering a Strawberry Cheesecake. "Are you getting anything?"

I nodded. "Yeah, can you send a platter of chocolate strawberries and a bowl of whipped crème?" the small girl nodded. "Thanks."

"What room is it?" She asked jotting down my order.

"Room 528."

She nodded. "Ok it'll be up in about twenty minutes or less."

I smiled. "Thanks." We waited for her to pass Edward his Strawberry Cheesecake. Then we came to the elevator. "So…what were you guys doing?" I asked when we were alone.

He groaned quite loudly as I smirked back. "UGH! Can we please not talk about this? PLEASE?" he begged nearly falling to his knees to beg.

"NO! I want to know!" He was stubborn and refused to do so. "Fine!"

Just as we reached their door, I grabbed his shoulder. "What?" he huffed looking eagerly to get back into the room.

I suppressed my laughter. "Can you at least tell me one thing?" he shrugged after a moment's thought. "When are you going to tell her?"

His eyes became wide and his eyebrows scrunched up in confusion. "W-what do you mean? Tell h-her wh-what?"

I rolled my eyes. "You suck at lying! When are you going to tell her that you love her?" He just stared at me for a few minutes. Then continued to try and open their door. "When?" I demanded pulling his card from him.

He sighed heavily. "As soon as she's cured. I'll take her out to celebrate. Then I'll tell her." He sighed once more. "You happy?"

I bit the inside of my lip, turning the thought around and around in my head. Then nodded. "You know, you are very dramatic for a guy!" I teased sliding the card in and shoving the door open. "We're back!" I shouted marching in, hugging Bella, grabbed Jake's arm and started tugging him toward the still open door. "We have something waiting for us back at the room. Love you Bella!" I winked at Edward as I shut the door and continued to the elevator.

"So what's back at the room?" je asked wrapping his arms around my waist, I sighed leaning my head back on his chest.

"Something sweet," I said lacing my fingers with one of his hands.

"Sweet?"

"Uh-huh…and sticky." I breathed out as his soft lips reached my ear.

"Sticky?" he whispered softly.

"Y-yeah," I sighed once the elevator dinged. I could feel my knees shaking!

Once I slid the card in, and I shoved the door open, I pushed Jacob against the wall. His eyes went wide as I jumped in his arms, wrapped my legs around his waist –closing the door in the process- and crashed my lips to his.

Jacob ran his right hand from my hip, slowly and trickily, up my side. Finally ending at the back of my neck; angling it the way he wanted. His left stayed wrapped around my lower half.

I could feel the intensity of his love for me. My heart pounded the same beat as his. Thump-th-thump-thump-th-thump! My breath was just as erratic as his, if not even more.

Finally he pulled away, softly kissing my swollen, red, lips one last time. "I love you, Amber. Don't ever leave me…please! Don't! I love you more than anything! Ask my father, my friends, they can tell you; before you entered my life; I was quiet, lonely, and always uptight. And then I met you. So beautiful, pure, innocent, and troubled." He smiled cupping my cheek softly. "I love you Amber. You're my world, and I plan on keeping it that way." He kept holding me up in his arms.

I smiled softly kissing his still wet lips. "I love you too, Jake. I would never leave you. I'm just scared that I'm holding you back. I love you, Jake. You're my everything. My world. My life. My love. When you get tired of me-"

Ding-Dong!

"Room Service!" a deep male's voice called from outside the door. "Room Service!"

I jumped down from his waist, kissing his lips once more. "I just…I love you, more than anything. I couldn't live without you, Jake. Ever." He smiled as I opened the door; either because of what I said or because my surprise was finally here. "Thank you for your trouble," I said pulling the cart inside.

"No problem. You have a good night, ma'm." the guy said politely then walked away.

I shut the door and turned to look at Jake. "You hungry?" I laughed as he looked at the chocolate coated strawberries.

He just nodded as his eyes roamed hungrily over my body and then to the bowl of whipped crème. "Oh yea…" he licked his, making mine want more, and stared intensely into my eyes, "starving!"

LOLZ! Jake needs to get his head out of the clouds…or was that Amber's intentions! Mmm…very good questions that need to be thought about…REVIEW! By the way, I am SO sorry it took so long! Please review! Summer's here! I have no plans what-so-ever!