Chapter 6

Journal Entry for Sunday November 2, 1997

It's me again. I know what everyone is thinking. How stupid do you have to be to pull something like that? Don't you even give a damn about your poor mother? Well, I give a damn about consoling her, but, really, I only cause problems for her, and her life would be a lot less stressful without me. And, frankly, my life would be a lot less stressful without me.

I'm home now. (My mom decided to just get me a tutor since I've already missed so much school between my dad's death and my near death). What to do, what to do? Maybe I could go over and talk to Wilson. I never did that a couple of months ago like I thought about. I'll do that, and then write back later.


Well, that went well. I thought maybe Wilson would be in a truth telling mood, but, alas, he wasn't. I didn't get much information. Just that my dad was arrested for dealing drugs 3 years before I was born. Surely he didn't go back to his old ways, right? I mean, he made a lot of money doing Tool Time, why would he need to? Unless he was using drugs.

So now I'm home alone again. I turn on the TV. It's 2 o'clock. Not much on, so I flip it off. Next I write a note, saying I've gone out for a walk. I write down the time, and say I'll be back in a couple of hours.

As I exit my house, I feel different. I feel like someone is watching me. I shove my worries to the back of my head though, and continue on. This cold air sure does feel kind of good. I stop by the Dairy Queen and buy a large strawberry shake, and exit the restaurant. Then I nearly burst into tears. I remember dad used to take all three of us kids there on the way home from the Y. However, I manage to regain my composure.

As I continue on my way, just aimlessly wandering, it begins to snow. I figure I'd better turn back early, so nobody gets worried about me.

While I stamp my feet on the red and green mat outside proudly declaring "WELCOME", I notice the snow worsen. Before too long, the snow storm became a full fledged Michigan winter blizzard.

Fuck! Just now, for the first time I realize what date today is. It is the second. That means it is the 2 month anniversary of…my dad dying. I was really honestly feeling a little bit better about this until that dawned on me.

Which reminds me. This morning my mom got a call from the DA's office. The lead prosecutor (Jon-Joel Weiss) is going to try to indict the two people accused of shooting my dad on a charge each of manslaughter in the first degree. Actually, it was the second chair prosecutor (Diane Early) that called. I don't much care for Mr. Weiss, but Ms. Early seems very caring and kind.

I need to do something to try to calm down. Maybe I'll give Lauren a call.


I just tried to call Lauren. Her line was busy. I'll just try back later. God I really hope I haven't done anything to piss her off. She is the last person on earth who I feel I can connect with, not to mention my (hopefully) wife to be.

All of a sudden I get a craving for some Polish food from Stan's. You know, I've read that if a deceased loved one's spirit is hanging around you, they can actually make you have cravings for food that that deceased person enjoyed in life. (Wow, that last sentence sounded cheesy, huh?)

Now I hear tires squealing. That means mom let Brad drive home. Now I'm pissed. She'd never have let me done anything like drive home in this kind of weather. Oh well.

-Randy

A/N BTW, if anyone has any suggestions for the next chapter, just send me a PM and if I choose to use the idea (any part of it), then I'll give you credit at the end of the chapter.