Chapter 16

Sunday December 7, 1997

Randy's POV

Once again I wake up to pure, unrefined pain.

This time, I'm able to open my eyes without sending searing waves of pain through my entire head.

I sit up a little bit, and can see that mom fell asleep in the chair next to my bed.

Somehow, she must of heard me, because she instantly wakes up.

'Oh good morning' mom says with a smile.

Yeah, good for who? I feel like hell warmed over.

I fake happiness though, just for mom's sake.

'Good morning' I smile, almost sounding like my old self. Wow, I haven't sounded that good or happy in a long time.

'Oh, I want to introduce you to your new doctor' mom says, jumping up.

She goes out, and re-enters a couple of minutes with a tall, brown haired man.

'This is Dr. Graff' she introduces.

'Hi Randy' he says with a genuine smile.

Well, he certainly looks nice and knowledgeable.

'How do you feel this morning? I know that seems like a stupid question, but I have to ask' Dr. Graff asks, chuckling a bit at the last part.

'Better than yesterday' I say.

I really do feel better. That, and if I say I feel better, I can get those damn bullet fragments out of my freakin' skull.

'Well that's good. You'll probably be able to go home in a couple of days. Then we can see about getting those bullet pieces out of your head' says Dr. Graff genially.

'That's good' I remark.

'Well, I really would love to stay and chat, but my wife just went into labor, so I must be off' Dr. Graff says on his way out.

'Oh, and I will be having a nurse come by later to talk to you about seeing a neurosurgeon, and about setting up an appointment for the surgery' says Dr. Graff from the doorway.

'So Randy, are you hungry this morning? I could run down to the cafeteria and get you something to eat. Or maybe get you a glass of juice?' mom asks.

'Could you just get me some water?' I ask.

'Sure thing. I'll be right back. I'll just leave the door open, if it's alright with you' she says, grabbing her purse.

I nod my head in response to her question.

While she's gone, it gives me time to think.

On the one side, taking 13 amitriptyline is a bad thing. It's bad for my body, since they're very toxic. On the other hand, I have yet to hear any voices in my head.

I'm just worried about those bullet fragments now. How does anyone know for sure that they can be removed? I mean, is it even worth the risk of sawing my head open and yanking foreign matter out of my skull?

I really wish dad was alive to be here for this. But then again, if he was alive, none of this would even be happening, would it?

Dad, why did you have to be out on that highway? Were you dealing drugs? Or were you just an innocent bystander?

Now mom's back with the water.

'Here you go' she says, sitting the water down on the table that pulls up to the bed.

Then I hear a knock on the door. It must be the nurse Dr. Graff mentioned.

'Hi Randy' smiles a young nurse.

'Hi' I say after taking a painful drink of water. (My throat still hurts).

'I'm here to talk to you about seeing a neurosurgeon and about setting up an appointment to get that bullet out of your head' the nurse explains as if I'm 5.

'Okay' I say. As if I had a choice to doing this.

'We're going to send you to Dr. Ultameier. You'll see him on the 10th' says the nurse.

'Then he'll determine when, or if, the operation will be' smiles the nurse. Geez, as much as she smiles, her cheeks must ache when she gets home.

Mom sits back down as the nurse leaves.

'Can I get you anything else?' she asks.

'Yeah. Could you help me up? I need to pee really, really bad. I haven't gone since last night' I say, smiling.

Yep. It definitely feels like the old me is back now. Just with the minor addition of extreme pain.

'I can take it from here' I tell mom, just so she doesn't follow me into the bathroom.

For some odd reason, standing there peeing, I start to think about things that have happened to me since I was a baby. I had severe asthma attacks as a toddler, then there was the time when I was 6 and broke my leg in two different places when I fell out of a tree, then of course a couple of years ago we thought I had cancer. Maybe I've just been cheating death my entire life. Maybe now it's just finally catching up to me.

I hear a knock on the door.

'Are you alright in there Randy? You've been in there for going on five minutes now' mom hollers through the solid oak door.

Has it been five minutes? I didn't even realized I'd stopped peeing.

'Yeah, I just got a little distracted is all' I reassure her.

I pull my underwear back up, flush the stool, wash my hands, and head back to bed. Overall, the trip took 10 minutes. (But it was definitely worth it).

I just wonder if I'll be like my old self for long or not.

A/N: Part of the writing credits this chapter should go to my cat, who was helping me write by laying on half of the keyboard of my laptop.

BTW, the reason I'm doing a mass update of my stories is today I have to have surgery performed on my nose, so I won't feel like writing or updating for at least a week, probably closer to two.

Okay, so please read and review if you want more of this story.

Thanks for reading.

-Yours truly, Randy Taylor