Unimaginable

By; Ashleyia Days

For the first portion of this chapter, Max will sound weird. Remember, she's under more drugs than you'll even believe. Of course she's going to sound a little...odd. Who wouldn't. Poor, poor Max. (But it is rather fun to torture them a bit. Hmm, wonder what I'm going to do to those dratted, annoying erasers...)

Chapter Five: Lost Memories

The world world felt...strange.

There wasn't any other way to put it into the right words. Perhaps I wasn't on a world at all, just floating in an abyss of a memory, or maybe it was simply a dream. A cruel dream, in a sense. It felt odd... All the time, I hadn't a clue what was happening to me. Or was it me at all? I couldn't even be sure of that.

I was floating...somewhere, it might have been my own mind. I had no way of telling for sure. I wasn't sure who I was...why did I feel this way? Shouldn't there be something to tell me why I was in the darkness alone, with no one there to guide me out. Surely, something could be done about this. The deep tone of black that settled around me was was unnerving enough, but it was much too quite for my taste.

Even in solid darkness, sounds were made. They were suppose to actually be clearer in the darkness. When one of your sense were dead, the remaining ones would become stronger to support the life-form it helped out. A newer white-coat had explained it to me before she found out that I was a mutant-- a freak. At the time, I thought she'd known all the while.

Of course, the senses thing didn't help at all anyway, because a moment later I found that all my senses were gone. No sounds were made in the impenetrable darkness. I couldn't feel as the air around me was invisible--I could swipe my arm through the emptiness around me and there wasn't a bit of wind to be felt. As for smell, well, there was either no smells to be smelt, or that was also gone. My eyes might work, but it was hard to tell. I only saw the darkness around me when my eyes were opened or closed. It didn't matter.

The world seemed frozen as I stayed still, floating in mid-air just the same. It was all hazy and I felt myself wanting this foolishness to stop. Who was I? What was I? Surely it couldn't be normal to be floating like this, even in a dream. They had restrictions too.

What I needed was to wake up--to find out was going on...

I groaned, but no sound came back to my ears. Perhaps, there was something wrong with me...

After all, if there wasn't, wouldn't I at least know my name? Shouldn't I have some sort of memory of my life to make this dream come to life? Or maybe that was the point.

Did I somehow loose my memory in life? A crash or something? What if the darkness was here because there was no dream to put in its place--nothing to stop the terrifying darkness to leave me alone. No dreams to drive it away? Wouldn't I be able to remember something?

I had too many questions I couldn't answer until I woke up from this dream--or was it a nightmare?

The question was: Could I wake up. Possibly, I could be in some sort of coma...

"Not well.."

The voices were dim, but she assumed these must be the people who were helping her. Or were they the ones who'd put her in this sinking darkness in the first place? Who were these people? Why couldn't she remember at all?

Maybe I have to be awake to remember everything...

"Heart Rate...increased...twenty percent. Not looking good..."

Were they talking about me? Was this some sort of freaky medical procedure they had me undergoing? But why? From what I heard about the heart rate thing, I most likely wasn't doing so good. But if this was a risky treatment, or whatever, why would they attempt it on me?

Did I volunteer?

"Experiment code number 48202-RM...failing... Dying...Nothing we can...do."

The voices continued to cut in and out now, but I understood fully at that very exact moment. I was dying. Whatever they were doing to me was making me slip. Maybe...just maybe if I remembered, then I'd know how to save myself. I'm young...I think! Whatever the case, I'm much too young to die.

And if I do die, I don't want it to be on an operation table, cut open.

"What do you mean, nothing you can do! Save Max!"

The final voice came in perfectly clear, emitting from a male who was somewhere behind the people I suspected were leaning over me. He sounded worried...Did someone here, in this room, truly care about what happened to me? No, an old voice said from behind a locked door in which I suspected was holding all my memories.

No, no one cared for me. Even I could remember that much. No one alive cared for me. That much was clear.

And, my name's Max...maybe.

Who knows. Maybe another person was there being treated. After all, Max was more commonly a boy name rather than a girls. Who'd name their daughter, Max? I surely wouldn't. Or I might... Everything was so confusing! I felt my blood boil in sudden anger.

That anger vanished as soon as I realized that I'd been able to feel something! Immediately after, I wished I hadn't. A sudden wave of intense pain washed over my frozen body and I gasped a strangled moan. Whatever painkillers they'd given me before were no longer working. Apparently those working on me heard my pain, and I felt more peace wash over me again.

At first I struggled against the soothing medication, but as it got more and more intense, I felt my body relax and the black void around me vanished, leaving me completely peaceful and asleep. It was better this way. No pain or suffering. I didn't want to wake up again.

Right before I fell into that deep sleep, I heard one of the doctors say, "She's alright. The procedure is nearly complete. I believe she'll make it."

Whatever he said after that didn't matter. I was asleep in a place where I couldn't be hurt. And I liked it that way.

When I finally came to, I braced myself for the impact of the memories of my past, that I'd been unable to access while in my comatose state, to come back. It took me a full hour to realize that they still weren't emerging from behind that locked vault door in my brain.

I knew nothing--not even my own name!

I pushed against that rusty, old vault door, hoping it would break from my strength. I was stronger than a regular human, I knew that, but I had no clue why. At the moment, I hardly even cared. I wanted this wall to crumble. It had to open--it looked so old...how could it put up with the pressure I put on it? Somehow it did and I collapsed to the metal floor in pure panic.

I lay on the floor for a while, sobbing, before I realized what I'd just thought...

Metal...

Floors weren't metal. At least regular ones weren't...I think. So why would these ones be?

As I opened my eyes, the only thing I could see was vague haziness around me. Nothing was clear. Everything was a grayish/white smudged. My first thought was that I was in one of those first graders writing books. Little first graders were always erasing things.

A minute or so later, that uncomfortable haze slowly worked its way into a very clear state. I almost wished it hadn't. I was in a cage. Had I been in a place like this before? Or was this all something new? I pushed on that hidden door in my brain and it still refused to budge. I would have to find out a different way then. Suddenly, i paused, realizing that maybe I didn't want to remember.

What if my past was filled with horrible images of torture and abuse that had been inflicted on me, or even others. Perhaps this was my own mind's defense against terrible things that had happened to me. Would I really want those memories back?

No, I don't.

All so very suddenly, I remembered one thing. That absolute need to escape this place.

Well, that meant none of this was new to me.

There was a groan from somewhere near me and I twisted on pure impulse, determined not to let an enemies get the best of me. With my groggy state, there was a chance the humans (I still wasn't sure whether or not I myself was human) could possibly beat me at my own game. Or was that someone else's game?

The sound had emitted from the next cage over and I lowered my defenses automatically as I saw a little boy, no older than seven, toss on the uncomfortable floor of the cage. I knew automatically that this wasn't how it was suppose to be...how I knew that much was beyond me.

"Hello?" I whispered, confused and disoriented.

The little boys eyes opened, echoing the confusion I knew must be in my own. "Who are you?" The little boy murmured. His gaze flickered a moment, then pure panic took over his small body. "Who am I?!"

" I don't know, but please, can't you be a little quieter? Who ever locked us in here can't be very nice. I don't wnat them to know I'm awake. I think it's time I--we got away from this place. It's like a prison here."

The small boy was quiet, a look of concentration on his small face. "When I think really hard, I remember a little bit. I know my name--it's Ari, I think. I can't think of yours though, no matter how hard I try. I know you, I can feel it! But your name's just kinda gone."

"Can you remember anything else? Anything at all?" I whispered back to him. If we were going to get out of here right now, we'd need any information there was to be found.

"Little." His eyes cleared. "I remember...my dad works here. He let me be operated on." Tears slowly began to fall to the floor of the cage. I wanted to wrap my arms around the boy to comfort him, but the cages had other things in mind. "They--I think their called white-coats-- were trying to make some way to get wolf genes blended with humans. They've already done it--the things they made were Erasers. I think what they did to us was make us Erasers, but different. I think we have control to act normal, and regular Erasers can't do that. They're cruel and they kill before they talk."

I felt that the roles we played were wrong. Shouldn't I be the one explaining this stuff to him? Why did I have to learn things that I must already have known from a little seven year old, named Ari? "Anything else?"

"Well, I remember that you had wings before the operation." And thus the reason why I had strength beyond a humans. I wasn't even human! I was some sort of mutant. "And you still do, but now I do, too. But there's nothing else." He bowed his head in shame.

'That's okay, Ari. You remember a lot more than I do. The next step is to get out of here."

"When do we do that?"

I got a deviousness look in my eye out of instinct. "Right now."

"Awesome."

I've updated! Didn't five reviews this time though. I just got tired of waiting...sigh. I hope you aren't all mad at me for makind Max an Eraser! Remember, she's a special Eraser that has actual feelings...Please, forgive me! I don't want to die today!

Review Responses

(4)

philokiller- First of all, nice name. And I can't really tell you whether or not they died. Maybe that would ruin the entire plot (wink, wink)

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Well, I think that was a little much...

And thanks. I hoped you like this chapter just as much as the last one. And please ignor my little rant above...

Mkitkat- Don't feel stupid...I forgive you :) No big deal in missing one. The actions should be coming up soon enough. I think...

Kyphus Maltorix- It has to be James Patterson. He's a great author with several books sold (at least a million from what I heard), while I can barely finish all my fanfictions. I don't plan on giving this one up, though. I'm really into it.

Oooooooh, a forbidden language...