Disclaimer: Samantha is currently in treatment, her problem with not owning Twilight has gotten worse. Send her your love (reviews ;]) and keep her in your prayers.
Poll on profile(:
Reviews are like Christmas mornings, full of surprises... and cinnamon buns with hot vanilla icing.
Screen names:
MsFallsAlot - Bella
DoIDazzleU - Edward
ICanCU - Alice
IxFeelxYou - Jasper
SoHawt - Rosalie
HearMeRoar - Emmett
DrShizzle - Carlisle
RUMyMommy - Esme
OffTheLeash - Jacob
SuPaStArSaM - Samantha, Me.
DoIDazzleU has entered the chatroom.
ICanCU has entered the chatroom.
IxFeelxYou has entered the chatroom.
DoIDazzleU: Hello, Alice... Jasper.
ICanCU: Edward... Jazzy-poo.
IxFeelxYou: *nods respectively and salutes*
DoIDazzleU: Jasper-
IxFeelxYou: Commander Whitlock to you.
HearMeRoar has entered the chatroom.
DoIDazzleU: -... Jasper, you're not in the army anymore.
ICanCU: It's been... damn the book never even mentions the damn year, what the hell!?
HearMeRoar: Oooh, dirty mouth, Alice. Clean it up with Orbit.
ICanCU: *shudders* Gum and all its sugary stickiness. *gags*
IxFeelxYou: I will not tolerate this disrespect... especially from Northerners no less.
HearMeRoar: Hey, war's over buddy... slaves are free... you lost.
ICanCU: Not a smart move, Emmett.
HearMeRoar: What the hell kind of physic are you!? You're suppose to tell me before I say it!
IxFeelxYou: Don't talk to my woman that way!
ICanCU: Your woman? *slightly turned on*
IxFeelxYou: *senses Alice's mood* Why yes, my woman...
ICanCU: I don't need to have a *cough* imaginary *cough* physic power to know where this is going...
IxFeelxYou: I don't need to be Jasper the Emotion Man to know what you want...
DoIDazzleU: And I don't need to be a mind reader to feel like I'm being mind-raped, right Emmett?
HearMeRoar: *going through thoughts about Rosalie* Mmmhmm.
DoIDazzleU: ... Yeah, it's only me.
ICanCU: Jasper, do you want to come upstairs and win my war?
HearMeRoar: *absentmindly* That's what she said.
IxFeelxYou: Do I get to wear my uniform?
DoIDazzleU: So... much... kink... *spazzes on floor*
ICanCU: Yes, you may. I'll be waiting.
ICanCU has left the chatroom.
IxFeelxYou: Later guys! I'm getting some! Woo!
IxFeelxYou has left the chatroom.
HearMeRoar: *stops very visual thoughts* *chuckles once* Hey, Eddie... even the emo's getting some! What's that say about you!?
DoIDazzleU: *relieved that some torture has stopped* I'd rather wait.
HearMeRoar: *dumbfounded* And you're definitely a male...?
DoIDazzleU: Yes.
HearMeRoar: And you don't want sex?
DoIDazzleU: I didn't say that. I said I'd rather wait.
HearMeRoar: Bella doesn't.
DoIDazzleU: How do you know?
HearMeRoar: I talked to her yesterday.
DoIDazzleU: *tries to read thoughts* About what? Stop singing that song! I hate it!
HearMeRoar: I wanna know is there anyone on the floor... who can suck me like a-
DoIDazzleU: I GET IT!
HearMeRoar: - *laughs*
MsFallsAlot has entered the chatroom.
MsFallsAlot: Hey fellas.
DoIDazzleU: Hello, love.
HearMeRoar: Hey, Bella *wink, wink*
MsFallsAlot: What's going on? *returns the wink, wink*
DoIDazzleU: You guys do realize you're typing what you're doing... right?
HearMeRoar: So Edward, let's talk about sex.
DoIDazzleU: Not in front of a lady, Emmett.
MsFallsAlot: Oh I'm no lady... wait...
HearMeRoar: That's right, Bella here is a hor.
DoIDazzleU: Hor?
HearMeRoar: Yes, hor.
MsFallsAlot: What is a hor?
DoIDazzleU: I don't... *reads Emmett's thoughts*
HearMeRoar: A hor is a female who-
DoIDazzleU: *roars* BELLA ISN'T A WHORE, YOU BASTARD!
MsFallsAlot: Wow, his sexy growl is fierce.
HearMeRoar: I didn't call Bella a whore, Edward... I called her a hor.
DoIDazzleU: That's because you can't spell, numb-nuts.
MsFallsAlot: I'm not a whore, Emmett. I just flirt a lot and have "surprise" sex, that doesn't make me a whore though...
HearMeRoar: I still don't know what a wha-hor-ee is, but whatever. Sorry, Bella. I was merely trying to spice up the mood.
DoIDazzleU: What the hell-
MsFallsAlot: Thank you, Emmett.
HearMeRoar: *smiles* Welcome.
HearMeRoar has left the chatroom.
DoIDazzleU: Care to explain what just happened, Bella?
MsFallsAlot: I don't know how to say it so I'm just going to come out with it, okay?
DoIDazzleU: Okay.
MsFallsAlot: Every time I see you I "Jizz In My Pants".
DoIDazzleU: ... What?
MsFallsAlot: Have you never heard the song?
DoIDazzleU: No.
MsFallsAlot: Okay... um how about I want you to give me my "Satisfaction".
DoIDazzleU: What are you trying to get at Bella?
MsFallsAlot: *frustrated* I want to have sex with you!
DoIDazzleU: *vampire shock*
MsFallsAlot: *taps foot impatiently*
DoIDazzleU: *comes out of vampire shock* I can understand where you're coming from Bella, I mean I'd tap me too if I were you, but I like my virginity, it keeps me sexy. Sorry, Bella. No sex means no sex.
DoIDazzleU has left the chatroom.
MsFallsAlot: Keep clinging to the V-card, Edward... but you'll fall so hard when you see me in my sexy blue undies! *evil laughter* Wait... this isn't right... *throaty evil laughter* Now that's hawt!
MsFallsAlot has left the chatroom.
Thanks, readers.
I appreciate the reviews/favs/alerts!
I love you guys!
Oh and look at all the possibly "that's what she said" jokes in the last half of the chapter... Emmett would have a damn epileptic seizure!
-Sam
