Hello Hello Hello. I decided to put this chapter on overdrive. If you couldn't tell, the last chapter was killing me. I just couldn't make it flow. Ah well. I guess that makes me like every other author around. I sent my co-authors on coffee break. I really didn't need to hear Doof complaining, once again. And, we have a winner! Come up to the mike, AnimtationNut! AnimationNut sent a P.M. after realizing who it was. Now that I think about it, I didn't give enough clues. I'll do better next time! Promise! ANyway, A.N. here has a few words to say.

AnimationNut: The more you are like yourself, the less you are like anyone else, which makes you unique. -Walt Disney"


D.P.E. H.Q.

"Yoooou raaaaang." Jake hissed.

"I have a very special reaping for you Jake." The gun cocked and rattled together as Jake shook in excitement.

"Aaalright." Jake hissed.

"Their names are Captain Olimar, Ruby Gloom, and Sm-" Jake's red eyes widened, and his tongue darted out nervously.

"D-Did you ssssssssay. Ruuuuby Gllllllooooom." Jake hissed nervously.

"Yes."

"But." He licks his eye nervously. "Ssssshe'sssss a-"

"I know what she is Jake. I want her soul taken to Hell." Akuma slams his hand on the table. Jake didn't even flinch.

"Aaaaalright. I'll sssssssee what I can do." Jake cocks his gun and slithers out of the room. There was a long silence in the room.

"Who was that?" Grand Emperor Bulblax asked, shivering slightly. Akuma smirked.

"The ace that was up our sleeves."


(Smiles' POV)

I chopped the Wogblax meat into the noodles, stirring it with some of the sauteed glowcaps. Olimar woke up, stomping groggily down the stairs.

"Morning!" I yell, causing Olimar to jump in surprise. We have put the creatures in a room that we pushed all of the oxygen in. We added a few toys and food and water, and a place that they could go when nature called. They were surprisingly house-broken. Anyway, I had my helmet on the counter next to me, breathing in pure Hocotatium, a very poisonous gas(to humans, but at the moment the game had changed me to a Hocotatian). He stared at the concoction that I was finshing with a look of disgust on his face.

"Is... that where the Wogblax's tail went?"

"Sure 'nough." I replied, sending the mushrooms and tail meat into the air, before spreading some of it on his noodles. I toss the bowl behind me, it landing on the placemat that I had set out before. Then there was a set of chopsticks flying, landing perfectly in the bowl. I nod in satisfaction, before pouring some more for me, and sitting down by the table. I took my chopsticks and started slurping. Now, Instant Space Noodles aren't bad, but they are horrendously, terribly, disgustingly bland. As soon as I tasted the meat, mixed perfectly with the glowcaps. The sauce was a little on the thick side, but it made up for that in flavor. I slurped loudly, I glanced over at Olimar, who was currently poking at the meat in the noodles. " 'Ou 'ot a try dis." I say between the noodles. Oimar gave it one last glance, before slurping hesitantly. His eyes popped.

"T-This is great!" He exclaimed, shoveling the noodles into his mouth. I laugh.

"Really? I had quite a long time to work on it at Smiles Away Reformatory School."

"Hmm? What's that?" Olimar asked.

"Oh uh..." I think quickly. A lie. A convincing lie.

"Smiles. I want the truth." Olimar said, putting the bowl down and giving a serious (well, I assume it was a serious) look. I put my bowl down.

"Alright. You see, this is not real." Olimar cocks an eyebrow.

"None of this is real?"

"Well... yes... no... ye-n-ye..."

"You think none of this is real!" Olimar had pushed his palms on the table as he got up. "I'm real! I work at Hocotate Freight Shipping Company! I have a wife and two kids, whose names are-"

"Sagittarius and Libra. They each gave you a ship part that you have named after them." Olimar's eyes popped.

"I have a co-worker who just started his job. His name is-"

"Louie. He is currently shipping a load of golden pikpik brand carrots. However, he won't be able to stop his ravenous appetite, and will eat every last one. He will then go to your superior Shacho and say that he was attacked by space bunnies and that they ate the cargo." Olimar's eyes grew even wider. "Now, after we get your last ship part, you'll find an item on the planet which you will bring back as a souvenier for your son. You'll get back to Hocotate Freight, where Shacho says that you have fallen into a 10,100 poko debt. You drop the souvenier which a nearby, rusted ship will take and say that it is worth 100 pokos. You then return to this planet again to repay the debt." Olimar's eyes had grown to the size of saucers.

"Y-Your crazy!"

"Yes. But that is besides the point. Do you really think that it was coincedence that you lost exactly thirty ship parts?"

"W-Well-"

"Do you think it was a coincedence that you'd only be able to have thirty days time to fix the Dolphin?"

"B-But-" My sight became blurry, and the colors seemed to turn into a deep purple.

"Do you THINK it was coincedence that you managed to find your most important ship part on the first day? Do you think it was coincedence that you found the red pikmin? Do you think it was coincedence that there was only enough pellets for 25 pikmin? And do you think it was a coincedence that the first day seemed just a little longer than the rest, or that the sun seemed to never move, or how night approached so quickly after you got the ship part? How it was like the day was waiting for you to finish! Now look me in the eye and say I'm crazy!" Olimar did just that. And fainted.


(Ruby's POV)

I woke up to the sounds of moaning and groaning, and sucking sounds. I open my eyes. I slept with my head on the knothole, so I could see what was happening down, down, far down below. There were horrid creatures, that appeared to be made of a green slop of some kind, and with piercing white eyes that appeared to come from deep inside its head. Little drops of it fell down, when they made contact with the ground, the grass would wilt and shrivel. However, the next thing was rather scary. What appeared to be a regular sized rattlesnake, from the knothole, was slithering through the creatures, a cowboy hat on his head. One of the green creatures got too close and the snake pointed its tail at the creature and the loud banging afterwards showed that there was a gun being fired, and the green and purple that came from the other creature's back showed that it was shot full of lead.

"Ruby. Ccccome out Ruuuuby." The snake hissed below. "Come to Rrrrrrattlessssnake Jake." When I didn't come out, Jake slithered on. The sun was getting high in the sky now, and all of the scary creatures were gone, if only for a moment. I command the pikmin to carry the ship parts under the Onion and sent them inside. Bludge grabs me, and I grab the quickly waning tail of Woggen and after making sure the ship parts were in good, Bludge slowly flew us towards ground level.


(Olimar's POV)

Smiles had just said things that I didn't dream possible. Shacho never gives what he's shipping to the populace. He's too paranoid. So, what was Smiles then? A god? No, then he wouldn't be helping me... or throwing pikmin. I pilot the ship back to ground, followed by the three Onions. Too my surprise, another Onion, this one a blue color, came landing in the empty space, three of my ship parts that were jammed under its legs. I recognized the Gluon Drive, The Repair-Type Bolt, and the Bowsprit.

"Oh good. You made it." A voice made me jump. I glanced up to see Ruby, in the clutches of a stocky bug. "I was starting to get really hungry." The bug gently set her down, and she in turn set down a wogpole that was in the middle of its maturation process, just getting its front legs. The three of them eyed us curiously. "You wouldn't happen to have any food on you, would ya? Three ship parts for three full meals?"

"Sure thing!" Smiles replied happily, running into the ship. He came back out a minute later, holding two bowls in one hand, and another in the crook of his elbow, showing absolutely no sign of effort. He handed two of them to Ruby and the bug, and then handing another to the small one. "Hello. What's your names?" The smaller creature croaked and the fat one buzzed. "Bludge and Woggen? What delightful names."

"H-How'd you know that?" Ruby asked. Maybe I should rethink the whole Smiles is a god angle.

"Oh, this is a videogame. Anything can happen." Was Smiles response.

"I'm in a videogame?" Ruby asked.

"Yup. And Olimar here is the protagonist!"

"Yippee. That makes me feel so much better, knowing that I've been made up by some guy that finds it entertaining to make me crash-land on some planet and fight for my life."

"Rated E for everyone." Smiles joked.

"It is? If this was a videogame, I'd say T at the least."

"Nope."

"Wow. That's just wonderful." I say sarcastically.

"That's nothing. When you're repaying the debt you-" He looks over at Ruby, who was busy slurping noodles. He leans in closer. "You find this treasure that reminds the ship of *cut out. Would make this story more than T*, and the ship names it the Maternal Sculpture."

"No!" I reply. He just nods. "Really?"

"Uhuh."

"So, I'm guessing this is one of your kind- what are you called?"

"Human."

"Okay. So... human's have something that looks like *cut out*."

"Oh, Hocotatian and human body structure is surprisingly similair. Eh, outside the suit, I mean. I've never seen a Hocotatian naked, and I don't plan to. The real difference is a human is way bigger than you. They could squash a bulborb by accident and not even notice." My eyes bug out.

"No!"

"Yes."

"Wow. And this... Maternal Sculpture-"

"We call it the top of a baby bottle, but that does seem a little long."

"So, this top... what exactly do you do?"

"Well, after a preset amount of time, a baby is supposed to stay off his mother's milk. She does this by *talk that is not T rating worthy* so to stop it from *Not T* Then, you put in a special formula into a bottle, screw on a top that is shaped like a *#%!* and they use that to feed the baby."

"Ahh... I think I understand now." I nod.

"Thank you for the food!" Ruby said, handing three empty bowls to Smiles.

"No probs Ruby." Smiles responded. I ran around, emptying 25 of each pikmin from the onions, and then commanding them to set them on each of the ship parts that Ruby had somehow gotten. That was when something in the clearing caught my eye. It was a golden orb. I walk over to it, and command 6 yellows to pick it up. They toted it, almost proudly, back to the onion. The onion accepted the prize, and I watched on my Pik-o-meter (patent pending) as the total number of pikmin grew exponentially. There was the sound of shattering glass. I turn, fearing the worse.

"S-Say that again." Smiles said, his eyes wide with fear.

"Alright. There were large green creatures, moving very slowly all around. They were probably as big as this ship. They also have glowing white eyes, did you know that? Very creepy. Oh yeah, and they came from these HUGE eggs that these rock monsters lay." Smiles pull out his notepad and starts scribbling.

"The rock creatures look like this?" He asked, showing the pad to Ruby.

"Yes! That's it!" Smiles went back to scribbling on his page, and turned it around so we both could see. What was on the page sort of looked like a grime covered fish with two small arms.

"A-And these creatures you saw today... looked like this?"

"Yes!" Smiles fainted.


(On the other side of the Distant Spring...)

"Damn buttonssssss." Jake hissed, trying his best to operate the walkie talkie. After placing a rock on it, he spoke into it. "Thissssss issssss Jake. No sssssssign of the targetsssssss." He moved the rock off and listened.

"They couldn't have just disappeared. Keep looking." Akuma's voice hissed over the speaker.

"What do you think I'm doing. If you don't shut your mouth then i'm going to-"

"Going to what? Bring my soul down to Hell? Oh no, I've been there six times, and that's good enough for me."

"Ssssssss." Jake hissed in frustration.


(Smiles' POV)

"We need someone to take base up there, and neither me nor Ruby can do that."

"No no no!" Olimar shouted. "I will not leave you kids alone!"

"We'll be fine. We have Bludge. If anything goes wrong, we bail. That means the sacrifice of pikmin, then so be it!" I lie. Olimar nodded once, before taking control of the ship and flying back to where the knothole on the huge tree that Ruby pointed out was. And we set out for the unknown.


Well, that's it. I've brought Rattlesnake Jake into the story. Everyone is practically dead now.