TJTMaria- We all need to give Merlin moral support after what he has been through

JuniorWoofles- Thanks

Merlin lay on the ground silently crying for at least half an hour. The young warlock didn't even move a muscle when he heard people's footsteps coming towards him. If it was Morgana approaching, he would just surrender; no fight or struggle. Merlin almost hoped it was Morgana, as he had forgotten the point of living, but knew that it revolved around the words Arthur and destiny. The word destiny only made Merlin feel worse as it reminded him of all the people he had lost and killed. Thinking of all the people he had lost was turning Merlin into a broken man. His thoughts were twisting how his mind worked, and loses he had sustained were breaking his soul. In the state he was in just now, it was hard to believe that Merlin had once been a strong man. He cried for Freya, Lancelot, Will and the numerous others he had lost. It was becoming hard for him to remember everybody that he had lost; there was too many to even count. After that Merlin cried for all the people's blood he had on his hands. There were too many people he had killed, directly and indirectly, to remember. Above all he cried for Morgana. Where was that sweet and innocent girl who would be determined to stop innocent people's blood spilling? Where was she? The girl that he missed beyond imagination was dead.

Her spirit is dead, Merlin told himself firmly. She is now a witch consumed by bitterness. Her actions are unforgivable. Even I cannot save her. I used to feel strange around her. Bring her flowers. In my old age I have become paranoid and killed too many to save Arthur's skin. I am not going to kill Morgana. I am going to save her. Forgive her. Change her forever. She may be the feisty determined sort but I don't care. I am determined too. She may have won the battle, but I will win the war!

These thoughts gave Merlin the energy to lift his head off of the earthy, pine covered ground. Seeing Gwaine and Mordred fleeing towards him, made relief flood through Merlin; the relief gave Merlin the motivation to clamber up. He wiped his reddened eyes, hoping that it wouldn't be too obvious that he had lain in pine needles and cried his heart out.

The duo of knights had been riding out to rescue Gwen when they had seen Merlin collapsed on the forest floor, crying. Exchanging worried looks, Gwaine and Mordred had unsheathed their swords and dashed towards the warlock. They were both shocked to see Merlin broken down like this as they had never even seen him release a couple of tears. Mordred was especially baffled to see, one of the most powerful sorcerers there would ever be, broken down. Merlin was such a state that Mordred wouldn't be shocked if he had lost his dearest loved one. The young knight was quite sure that Merlin had not even lost anyone just now, let alone his loved one. Mordred wasn't even sure if Merlin had someone that he really, really loved and would sell his heart too.

"Merlin, what's wrong?" gasped Gwaine. Gwaine dropped to the ground beside Merlin to see his friend's face covered in tears. Merlin offered Gwaine a small, solemn smile through tears; it was full of devastation and misery. The young warlock unsteadily stood up with a look of sheer determination on his face. Wiping the tears away with a serious look, Merlin untrustingly looked at Mordred. This untrusting look confused Mordred as he couldn't figure out what he had done to be untrustworthy. The knight assured himself by remembering that Merlin was in a state and was likely to be cold towards everyone

"I'm fine." Merlin coldly replied. Strictly speaking this wasn't true but Merlin did not want to confide Gwaine or Mordred with his problems. Words would not even explain how Merlin felt and he doubted anyone would be to understand his feelings, mind readers included. What are you doing here? Merlin telepathically interrogated Mordred.

Like Gwen, I followed you and Gwaine, Mordred telepathically explained. The Saxons think that Gwen is Morgana so they have taken her hostage. We are going to rescue her and Arthur says that you have to assist Gwaine and me on this mission. I've brought you a horse. Mordred gestured towards a bay stallion, making Merlin look more suspicious by the minute. Merlin just couldn't put his finger on how Mordred could have found him in the middle of the forest at this precise moment. He doubted it was sheer luck; luck was extremely seldom. After a long and careful think, Merlin decided to reject Mordred's suspicious suggestion of going on the mission to rescue Gwen. The warlock knew that Mordred and Gwaine were more than capable of rescuing Gwen, and he refused to believe that Arthur would send him away with the pair of knights. What would be the point of that? Merlin thought it would be more likely to be a ploy from Mordred, to keep himself out of the way, and make the druid's path clear to kill the king.

I can't go with you, Mordred. Morgana thinks that I'm dead so she will surely try and kill Arthur. She will think that, now I'm dead, there will be nothing between her and killing Arthur.

You must come with us Emrys or else the queen may perish. Merlin glared at Mordred for several seconds before realising that if Mordred was Arthur's bane then Morgana wouldn't be able to kill him. If Morgana had found out that Mordred was Arthur's bane then surely she wouldn't try to kill Arthur. Merlin pondered on this thought for a minute but decided that the High Priestess's next move was completely unpredictable and decided to remain, in Camelot, with Arthur.

"I'm going to remain with Arthur," Merlin stubbornly decided, using a fierce tone that Mordred disliked. Mordred could not understand why, minute by minute; second by second, Emrys grew colder towards him. It was not like he had been doing anything wrong recently, with the obvious exception of saving Morgana's life and working for both Arthur and Morgana. He was a likeable young man and even the ladies began to pay him more attention than they did Gwaine. Though Mordred didn't realise it, the other knights were beginning to envy his closeness to the king. Luckily, the knights were too noble to admit their jealousy for Mordred and continued to treat the Druid like their brother

Wait Emrys, Mordred telepathically called. Merlin, who had been about to begin the tiring journey to Camelot, glared straight at him with a steely look. Mordred shuffled his feet uncomfortably, again wondering what he had done wrong. He had to have donr something wrong for the warlock to look that coldly at him. The young knight knew that what he was about to do, was not going to help him get on better terms with the warlock. He tried to ignore this seldom but miserable feeling of being disliked. To Merlin's surprise Mordred dashed right up to him and grasped Merlin's skinny wrist.

"Acene slæp swilce cwalu," Mordred muttered under his breath. Before Merlin had time to realise it, he had fallen into a deep sleep and crumpled to the ground. Mordred just managed to catch his fellow sorcerer before he hit the ground and maimed himself.

"What have you done?" Gwaine asked in frantic tone. All of this time, Gwaine had been hovering in the background, not having clue what was going on. The two sorcerers had been looking at each other like they were having a conversation but they were not making a sound. Then Merlin had suddenly blurted out about him wanting to stay in Camelot by Arthur's side. Gwaine couldn't understand where this sudden outburst had came from as he and Mordred had not suggested that he even left Arthur's side, yet.

"It's a mere sleeping enchantment," Mordred explained in a low voice. There was something in his tone that Gwaine didn't trust, but he could not understand what. They were like brothers and Gwaine felt like he could read Mordred fairly well. Gwaine knew that Mordred was speaking in his calm voice; calm but full of evil which Gwaine didn't notice. "To keep Emrys- sorry Merlin," Mordred corrected himself. "To keep Emrys away from the gruesome battle we will give him to the Druid, Iseldir. Iseldir will take care of him and make sure that he is away from all the fighting. The battle would surely be the bane of Merlin if he was to fight in it. The warlock in indeed no warrior and, even with his great powers, would surely die." Though this reassured Gwaine, he was still sure that Mordred had a steely but triumphant glint in his aqua eyes.

The young knight stooped down to haul the lifeless Merlin up and struggled to do this. Merlin's deep sleep resembled death which made Gwaine feel apprehensive and tense. Gwaine was still unsure that Mordred had done the right thing but helped him get Merlin onto his horse. What was done was done. Gwaine knew that if there was any consequence of this they would have to cross that bridge when they got there. Perhaps the younger knight was right and this was for the best. Even still Gwaine was wary of Mordred's motives.

The two knights lifted a lifeless Merlin onto the horse and mounted their horses. They kicked their heels into the horse's flanks and set of at a trotting pace, which was not too pleasant for Merlin but he was fast asleep and couldn't notice anything.

...

Since Callolith had been taken over, Princess Mithian and her father had remained in Camelot. Arthur had insisted that they took up refuge in Camelot's castle, not that they really had a choice of where else to go. Since then Mithian had spent her days hovering around the castle and attending most important meetings. Though Camelot seemed to have danger lurking at every corner, Mithian still grew bored. She knew that she should not feel bored, Arthur always seemed to be going on quests and putting his life on the line, but Mithian couldn't wait to get out the castle. The princess was raring to do something useful in this time of need and desperately wanted round up some more of her soldiers. About a hundred troops and knights that still loyal to King Stewart and Mithian had also taken refuge in Camelot and its surrounding areas. They all managed to fit in somehow although Arthur wasn't too sure how they were managing it. Perhaps it was mix or their determination and harmony.

In this late hour of night, Princess Mithian had been woken from all the commotion of Gwaine and Mordred rushing around the castle. After that she couldn't get to sleep so went for a stroll round the castle and discovered that Arthur seemed to be in the council chambers at this hour. Princess Mithian strode into the room with a worried expression on her face as it wasn't usual for council meetings to take place in the middle of the night. Even if the Queen of Camelot was missing, Mithian could not understand what it had to do with the council members. All their faces turned to Mithian with grim expressions on them making Mithian's heart.

"What's wrong?" Princess Mithian burst out not able to restrain the question any more. Arthur had not made eye contact at all with Mithian and stared forlornly at the ground. The council members all sank back into their seats not wanting to inform Mithian the grave news. After thirty seconds or so, Arthur gazed at Mithian knowing that he could not conceal the news any longer.

"There is a large Saxon army approaching. They are only four days march from here," Arthur mumbled. Mithian didn't know if anyone else could feel it but it felt like Arthur almost wasn't here. His mind seemed to be constantly somewhere else and his eyes didn't seem to be focusing on anything. "We are greatly outnumbered but I know of allies that may help us. If I ride to meet Queen Annis th-"

"Queen Annis?" Princess Mithian abruptly injected. Arthur head slightly twitched so Mithian took this as a nod. "I have met her before so perhaps I could be of some use and go in your place." Thinking about this carefully, Arthur decided that Princess Mithian was in no greater peril in Annis's kingdom than she was here.

"I'll go with her," Sir Leon blurted out. Everyone stared in his direction shocked at the knight's attitude towards the Princess. "Forgive me," Sir Leon apologised. "I shall go with Princess Mithian so I can protect her... from the... from the evil of this world." Everybody in the council chambers began to feel awkward and uncomfortable at Leon's speech. Even Geoffrey of Monmouth felt disturbed by what the knight had said. Leon could sense everyone being uncomfortable and began to blush a deep shade of magenta.

"We shall leave with haste then," Princess Mithian decided trying her best to cover up the sticky situation. She turned on her heels before gliding out of the room. Sir Leon rose from his chair determinedly looking at a fixed point on the door, before striding out of the room after Princess Mithian.

"You majesty, I do not mean to be rude but I need to check something," Gaius humbly said from his seat in the table. He looked rather uncomfortable about this situation but carried on all the same. "How do you know that the Lady Lily was telling the truth? Twenty thousand soldiers less than a couple days march away from here?" This caught Arthur's attention and he snapped right back into action. Arthur thought from Lily's terrified face to Gaius's suggestion and knew that the physician might be right. He had just on the instant trusted Lily as they had known each other fairly well as children.

"You do not believe that she is telling the truth?" Arthur calmly asked, now completely focused on what was happening. Gaius uncomfortably looked at the ground and gave Arthur an almost apologetic look. "Speak your mind, Gaius. You are the best counsel that is available to me just now." Feeling very touched, Gaius looked up at Arthur and offered him one of seldom smiles; it was feeble but still a smile.

"I may be wrong as we have both known the Lady Lily since she was a child. She was friends with you and may others," Gaius reminded. Suddenly, Arthur managed to pick up on what Gaius was saying and felt stupid for forgotten this vital detail. When they had been children Lily and Morgana had been best friends. Arthur had remembered envying their close friendship as though he friends, he was not as close to him as Morgana and Lily were to each other. Slowly Morgana's and Lily's relationship began to fade as everyday Morgana grew closer to Gwen. Then when she was fourteen, Lily had moved away with her family and Arthur had not seen her since. These memories made Arthur more and more wary of Lily by the second. The king remembered how he had thought how Morgana and Agravaine had been friends when they had been foes, thirsty for his blood. Arthur tried to push these memories away but he couldn't.

"I may just be hasty, my lord," Gaius apologised. "But keep that in mind. I need to tend to the Lady Lily now but I'll come back as soon as I can." Arthur nodded his head to dismiss Gaius who steadily clambered onto his feet. The old physician hobbled out of the room and gave a small sigh of relief. He knew that Arthur was blind to a lot of people's faults and, though Gaius had no proof of Lily doing anything wrong, he had to remind the king to remain cautious. With a Saxon army apparently attacking; Gwen being taken hostage by Saxons; Morgana lurking in the dark and the whole population of Camelot facing extermination, Gaius knew that Arthur's mental state was facing its biggest threat yet. Most people's mental states would have broken by now but Arthur wasn't anyone and seemed to be coping quite well. Gaius could sense that Arthur was vaguely concentrating on the Saxons and could understand why, but Arthur needed to be giving the Saxons his full attention. In a couple of weeks time, Gaius could sense that a battle would rage which would determine Camelot's fate forever. If the Saxon won then the citizens of Camelot would either be enslaved or exterminated. Gaius began to wonder where Merlin was as Camelot needed the young warlock in order to survive the brutal battle that would surely occur.

...

Bang!

Gwen woke up at this loud noise and began to remember what had happened. She bolted up looking for the little boy that she had calmed the night before but could not see him. Sage had been his name and Gwen was beginning to remember the conversation that they had had as she began to properly wake up. Then everything came flooding back to Gwen and she began to pinch herself hoping that she would wake up and this would just be a nightmare. The more Gwen thought, the more that it dawned on her that this was no nightmare; it was reality. Wanting to double check it was reality, Gwen noiselessly pushed herself onto her feet and crept towards the entrance of the tent she was in. The queen pulled back the flap of the tent and peered out at the sleeping Saxons. Sage was outside stoking the fire so Gwen decided to retreat back to the furs to get some more sleep. The Saxons had stayed up late arguing and it was the early hours of the morning before they settled down to sleep. They had argued about many things but the majority of fighting had consisted of something to do with 'Morgana'. Their conflicts could be heard from miles off so Gwen could hear every word that the Saxons said, although sometimes it sounded like incoherent nonsense to Gwen because of their broad accents. The Saxons had debated between torturing Gwen up or leaving her unscathed for the moment. This conflict had gone on for well over three hours before someone came up with the idea of King Gremian wanting Morgana unscathed. They had suggested that the gold could be at stake if they tortured 'Morgana' causing an exhausted Gwen to relax and fall asleep right away.

For the next few hours Gwen came in and out of sleep as she didn't seem to notice the Saxons making a racket whist they got up and prepared for traveling. Gwen only woke up when a Saxon violently shook her awake and shouted right in her ear. This caused a flicker of fear to cross her face but it was gone as soon as it came. Unlike Morgana, Gwen did not care about showing fear; everyone showed it. The only way Morgana would show her fear would be either when she tried to manipulate someone by using it or if she was scared out of wits. Morgana did not tend to be scared out of wits except from when she saw Emrys but now the witch was not scared of Emrys as she regarded Merlin being a sorcerer a bit of a joke. After all who would suspect the clumsy and idiotic Merlin to be her doom? Morgana just couldn't get her head round Merlin being her doom.

"YOU STUPID WITCH!" roared the Saxon when Gwen stumbled up and lost her balance. She was still half asleep and couldn't think straight, let alone get up without falling over. The Saxon wrenched Gwen up by her hair and dragged her out of tent towards Chief Pierce. He chained Gwen up to his horse's bit and then the Saxons set off towards the massive army that marched on Camelot. Chief Pierce's eyes gleamed as he thought of the great reward that he would get for capturing the witch. He would get immediate retirement and never have to work another day. Everyday he would be able to participate in a leisure activity of his choice or sleep the whole day. Chief Pierce was too busy dreaming of this life to realise the stupid mistake his fellow Saxon had made.

...

The duo of knights and Merlin trotted for several hours, through fields of lush, crisp grass; steep crags (one mistake would mean certain death); murky streams and the usual forest background. Finally they reached a desolate cave which belonged to the Druids. Mordred dismounted his horse, unsheathed his sword and gently placed it on the ground. Gwaine followed Mordred suit but firmly clenched the hilt of his sword, refusing to put it on the ground.

"Put it down," Mordred softly requested, watching Gwaine's sword warily. "The Druids do not like swords or any weapons." Gwaine hesitantly placed his sword on the ground and all of a sudden felt extremely vulnerable. After all the Druids had magic to use as a weapon and if they got in a pickle, Gwaine would be completely useless and vulnerable.

"But magic is a weapon," Gwaine protested, not wanting to be parted from his weapon. The young sorcerer looked at Gwaine with interested; neither angry nor happy. He then gave a small Gwaine a little smile before it suddenly vanished.

"It can be," Mordred murmured from the depths of his heart. "Magic is neither good nor bad. It is like a medicine. Medicines can be life savers if used in the right way, but killers if used in the wrong way. I want you to understand that it is the user that is good or bad, not magic." Gwaine watched Mordred intently before the two knights gentle lifted Merlin down. The pair carried Merlin into the eerie interior of gloomy cave. It was pitch black until Mordred muttered an enchantment and a ball of light appeared. The light hovered in front of the knights, guiding them and ensuring that they did not trip over any debris or even their own feet. Eventually the duo of knights almost strode right into Iseldir, the druid leader.

"Iseldir, old friend," Mordred laughed, shaking the Druid's hand. "I thought you were a monster." Iseldir looked curiously into Mordred's eyes and then broke into small smile when he realised who it was. He could never forget that dark haired child with those huge aqua eyes.

"Mordred, how you have grown," Iseldir remarked. "But whom are your friends? Emrys and a knight of Camelot, is it?" Gwaine coughed indignantly at this remark as he wasn't just any night of Camelot. He was was the most liked by the ladies, the most handsome knight of Camelot, the knight of Camelot with the best hair, the funniest knight of Camelot, the knight of Camelot which was known for eating apples in the midst of battles, the list went on and on and on and on. Gwaine didn't think of any of his flaws but just of his perfect traits, perfect looks and perfect actions.

"It is Emrys and this is Sir Gwaine a noble knight of Camelot," Mordred said. That was more like it! Gwaine pretended to look the part of being the noble knight, although he thought he wasn't that noble. "I wish to ask you a favour. Emrys cannot fight with a sword so I wish for him to be kept safe away from the battle with the Saxons. Would you look after him?"

"Indeed I shall, but if Emrys wants to go than I shall not cause a conflict and he is free to go," Iseldir explained. He understood Mordred's plan a lot better than anyone else including Gwaine. The two knights thanked Iseldir and made their way out of the cave but before Mordred could leave he felt a voice talking inside his head. I know your twisted revenge, Mordred, and I advise you to stop it. You shall fail and you shall pay.

...

Morgana approached Camelot's gates and although it was the early hours of the morning, she still wanted to give her dear half brother a visit. Blasting back a couple of guards, Morgana strode right through the centre of Camelot as she was no longer afraid for herself. Emrys was her doom but he was dead. She did not care if was seen as no one would be able kill her. The witch could wield steel magic as well as steel and everyone with their petty weapons were no match against her. Morgana had been growing bored today as she had made Morrigan leave in the morning to stop her from getting hurt in the Saxon wars. Not being able to wait for the massive battle to start, Morgana had decided to visit her dear half-brother and perhaps her half-sister in law too. Before Morgana realised it she was face to face with Arthur's chamber's door. Pushing it open, the witch peered through tdisco ever her brother sitting in a chair looking very grim. Morgana longed to say something along the lines of surprise but restrained it as it wasn't a very fitting thing to say to her enemy. Before Morgana had a chance to say anything Arthur noticed her presence but didn't seem to react.

"What do you want Morgana?" Arthur sighed.

What do you want Arthur and Morgana to have a conversation about in the next chapter? Thanup you very much for reading and please review.