Plan E

Inspiration: The Chronicles of Narnia

Basic Procedure: Find enchanted tree, preferably apple. If enchanted tree can't be found, hire neutral to benevolent magician to enchant one. Cut down tree. Build wardrobe. Travel through wardrobe into magic country. Come back from enchanted country and convince Clark the people there need our help. Over-throw evil witch running country. Be instated as kings by animal deity. Don't get angry if Clark is named High King. Rule for years before coming back un-aged and no time having passed. Secure friendship.

Status: Failure

Reason for Failure: Despite multiple attempts, was only ever able to get to one other land. Land was not being oppressed by evil witch and people seemed content. Additionally land was so cute it would give sugar a cavity. Would not want to rule this land for any length of time anyway.

Additional Notes: Even when not interdimensional portal, wardrobe is significantly larger on the inside than outside. Keep the wardrobe, repurpose closet back into mid-sized sitting room.