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A/N: Thank you for the reviews, I know the last chapter wasn't too exciting, unless you're one for reading between the lines and character interaction. And why, pray tell, would I would bring back Justin?! What in the world am I thinking? I personally hated him. I understand the role he served, but meh. He really was a self-serving all about me type of character. And of COURSE that whole getting between Michael and Brian thing, can't forget that! There was always just something about little miss Sunshine that I couldn't stand. I might be alone in this… I fear the BJers (hah, BJ)…

I hope you enjoy this one!

~SL

Chapter Four

"Hey, Brian?" Michael called down the hall, stepping out of the bathroom. Brian had stopped over the next week, just like he'd said he would. He was currently flipping through an old copy of Captain Astro on Michael's bed. He grunted questioningly.

Michael sighed, leaning against the doorway. "Did you hear about Justin's show? Apparently he's, like, the main event in some fancy gallery in New York."

"I was there when Theodore mentioned it, yes," Brian said in a bored tone. Michael saw the other man push his tongue gently against a cheek. It was an irritated move. It could've been mentioning Ted or Justin, Michael wasn't sure which.

"Yeah, right," he said, entering the room and perching himself on the edge of the bed to slip his sneakers on. "Apparently it's a month long thing."

"Fancy that."

"Mm, big articles being put out about it on the web and-"

"Michael, does this have a fucking point?" Brian snapped, tossing the comic down carelessly on the bed.

Michael turned around, resting his weight on one hand. "Are you gonna go?"

Brian was tapping his fingers impatiently at his sides as he waited for Michael to answer the door. Justin had gotten a room close enough to Liberty Ave to walk down. No one else knew the blonde was back besides Brian and Michael. Surprises were fun, weren't they? The door started to open.

"About time, Mikey," Brian chided, taking a halting step forward. It certainly wasn't Mikey. Ben was standing in the doorway, a pair of barely put on boxers that he hitched up absently as he looked at Brian.

"He's a little busy," Ben said, obviously annoyed. "Can I take a message?"

"Oh, fuck off, Benny Boy," the dark haired man snapped. "Michael knew we were going out tonight."

"I was trying to," Ben shrugged dismissively. "You've got a knack for interrupting."

"Michael!" Brian called out, leaning over Ben's shoulder. "Mikey, you bastard, you knew I was picking you up at eight!"

Michael came stumbling down the stairs, one hand running through his dark hair while the other was trying to keep himself covered with the unbuttoned jeans. He had just grabbed the first thing off the floor. "Christ, Ben, let him in before the neighbors call the fucking cops!"

Ben's intimidating form cleared the way for Brian and he crossed the threshold, giving Ben a snort of disgust as he walked by. Michael looked… well, he'd looked better. He was currently zipping up his jeans (apparently going commando for the night… Brian found that curiously exciting as he could never remember a time when Michael had been without something under his jeans) and he looked like he'd been put through the wringer. His chest and shoulders were covered in glaring red marks against the pale skin, hair spiked every which way and he looked completely disoriented.

"Mikey, we were going out with the guys tonight, remember?" Brian asked, almost whining about it. He didn't like running into Ben and he liked seeing Michael coming from bed with Ben even less.

"You're usually late," Michael shrugged. The guys. With Justin. Just like old times, how great?

Brian straightened up. "Yeah, well, special occasion tonight. Thought we'd be on time for once."

Michael shook his head slightly, almost bewildered. Ben asked what the occasion was, not having left the room, but watching the interaction closely.

"A little Sunshine decided to stop by and brighten up the Pitts," Brian explained, smiling over his shoulder at Ben. Michael snorted derisively.

"Justin?" Ben asked, Michael rolled his eyes and nodded. "Well, that's a surprise. Baby, you want me to go with you? Haven't seen Justin since he left."

Michael looked at Brian. "Yeah. Most of us haven't."

"But-"

"Michael, enough," Brian snapped, straightening his tie and snapping his wrists out to check the cuffs absently. "I've got business to do."

Michael had come by Kinnetik with some lunch from the diner. They had made plans for the weekend since Michael had found out about a comic convention the next town over. They were, on Brian's droll approval, just going to wing it. Michael had rolled his eyes, because Brian didn't understand just how popular these things were, so he had booked a reasonable hotel nearby. He planned on bothering Brian until they were going to leave for the weekend. He walked in to find Cynthia in a flurry and Brian passing on last minute instructions over the phone.

"I can't believe you're just ditching me this weekend!" the shorter man exclaimed. "Where do you suddenly have to go?"

"I told you it was business," Brian brushed off, taking up a duffle bag on the large couch, slinging it over his shoulder. "You caught me just in time. I've got a flight to catch within an hour."

"Brian."

The quiet tone made him turn around. He didn't think it was lying, really, just… a little omission. Tiny, small. Not worth mentioning. Michael looked curious, almost like he knew, but Brian wasn't sure. It could be his imagination. Sometimes it killed Brian, but he had lived through worse.

"Mikey, its business," Brian said in a soothing voice, closing the distance to place his hands on his best friend's shoulders, giving a little squeeze. "I'm sorry about the convention, but it was last minute and so was this. Problem is, this is a big client. I can't just blow him off."

Michael looked like he had much more to say in the matter, but it was easier to smile. "Okay, okay. I'm sorry. Just don't pout."

Brian smiled, pulling their foreheads together. "Until next time, Galaxy Lad."

"Yeah, yeah. Go play hero, Captain Astro."

They shared a brief kiss before Brian hustled out of the office, departing Cynthia with a recap of things she needed to accomplish. Michael sighed, sitting on the couch. Maybe Hunter would go with him. Asking Ben seemed out of the question, he was too busy working or writing. Actually, Michael wasn't sure anymore. He was just too preoccupied.

"Hey, Michael," Cynthia said, coming into the office to straighten up the desk. "I figured you might've been going with Brian."

Michael gave Cynthia a confused look. "Why? It's a business trip. He's never dragged me along on one. I don't think I'd be much fun."

"Oh," the blonde said, sweeping some papers into a drawer. "He said he was going to New York."

"If that's where the business is," Michael shrugged.

"Well, I just saw all this info he was screwing with for Justin's show," she explained. "I figured he was going to see it. Even had me book a hotel near the gallery."

"Y'know," Michael sighed and then laughed abruptly. "I shouldn't be surprised. And yet… I'm surprised."

"I dunno, honey," Michael said, trying to calm the dark hair down by running his hands through it. "You've got papers to grade, right?"

Ben shrugged. "I could put them off for an hour or two."

"Sorry, Prof," Brian interrupted. "I've got the Corvette. Only room for two."

Michael bristled. It was probably Brian's fault Justin was here, obviously something was going on there. If nothing, Brian was snidely accommodating with Ben. Considering this was an actual group outing, with Justin no less, why couldn't they all go? Why the fuck did Brian get to pull all the strings?

"Y'know, Brian," Michael said. "Why don't you go on ahead and we'll make our way over later?"

"Michael-"

"Come off it," Michael snapped, wheeling on Brian. "Your little fucktoy is back in town, why don't you go see him already?"

"Michael," Ben stepped towards his husband, a warning tone in his voice. As much as he and Brian were at odds, Michael didn't need to fly off the handle.

"No!" Michael shouted, pointing at Brian. "This jackass just had the little shit show up today! Like it was out of the fucking blue! Like he lived down the mother fucking street!"

"Mikey," Brian tried to reason, gently and hesitatingly took a step forward. "It was a surprise for everyone."

"Not you!"

"No, not me," he agreed. "But I knew he was coming for a week and we decided not to tell anyone. Tonight was the surprise. We were going to surprise your mom later in the week too, or do you want me to go bring her to Woody's?"

Michael balked at this point. Why the fuck did Brian have to make him seem like the irrational one every goddamn time? How the hell did he get away with it? Ben cleared his throat and interrupted the staring contest.

"Baby, I'm just… gonna go back to bed," Ben offered, kissing Michael on the cheek. "You come upstairs and finish getting dressed… I'll help."

Michael smiled briefly over his shoulder at Ben, patting his arm before his husband went back upstairs. Now Brian and Michael were just stuck alone at a tense stalemate. Brian slipped his hands into the front pockets of his jeans and Michael scratched absently at a bare arm, not quite sure what to do.

"You didn't have to talk about me like I wasn't in the room," Michael said sullenly.

"He did that, not me," Brian defended himself.

"You always let him get away with shit."

"And I don't let you?"

Michael scoffed. "Fuck no you don't! You never let me forget anything."

"That's not true, Mikey."

"The ten speed bike," Michael offered. "Borrowing the car, not coming to Hard Heroes, taking in Hunter, moving in with Ben, JR, marriage-"

"Are you coming or not?" Brian cut him off, rolling his eyes.

Michael sighed. "Fine. Give me five- no, twenty minutes. I gotta take care of… something."

Brian snorted.

"You didn't have to stay in a hotel," the blond insisted, meeting Brian at the lobby of a fairly nice hotel. They were meeting for dinner, time to catch up and talk about the show. Brian had gone with casual for tonight in black slacks and an open black button down t-shirt over a white muscle shirt.

"It's only your first show, Sunshine," Brian pointed out, wrapping an arm around the blond man's shoulders. "You haven't hit the big time yet. I think I have finer tastes than your studio apartment."

Justin automatically put his arms around Brian's slim waist, grinning up at the older man. "What are you saying? That I couldn't afford you?"

"No one could afford me," he stated smugly. "Now, what does the rising star want for dinner?"

"Oh my god," Justin sighed, leaning comfortably against Brian. "There is the fantastic little café a few blocks from here."

"Is that a 'few blocks' in Pitts or a 'few blocks' in New York?" Brian asked as they exited the hotel and tangled themselves in the constant foot traffic. It wasn't hard to know that the sidewalks were busy day or night in this city, many, if not most, walked. There were a lot of blocks in New York to walk and someone who lived here might think twenty-five blocks was 'a few'. Brian found the idea horrifying.

Justin shoved Brian in the side. "Don't whine. We'll be there before you know it."

"You sure?" Michael asked, pulling on a faded brown t-shirt. "I'll tell him we can see them all another time. Maybe with more warning."

Ben looked up from his book, covers pulled up enough to keep him decent. "Baby, just go and have a good time and tell Justin I said hi. Maybe your mom'll do a dinner and we can all meet then."

Michael flopped onto the bed on his stomach. "We just haven't been able to go out much together, y'know?"

"Trust me, I know," Ben smiled thinly. "Still thinking about that weekend?"

"Still thinking of bringing your book?"

"Go have fun, Michael," Ben sighed, leaning over to kiss his husband. "And try not to get in too late, please?"

"Yeah, yeah," the shorter man agreed impatiently, rolling off the bed. "Night."

"Night, Michael."

Michael shut the bedroom door and took his time getting back downstairs. He really hoped Ben would want him to stay home. For once in this last year, he wouldn't've started a fight about being kept away from Brian. He just didn't want to see Justin. Not with his arms around Brian, or that self satisfied smile he gave everyone and especially not that adoring one he gave Brian. But that really wasn't all. Sure, Michael could imagine that ridiculous things Justin would do, but Brian? Would Brian keep his arm around Justin? Would he still give the blond that small tug at the corner of his lips while looking down at him (although, now it seemed they might be a little closer in height…)? Michael would rather lock himself in a room with Ben while he was writing for the rest of his life than watch tonight's many scenes play out.

He landed at the bottom of the stairs and didn't see Brian. Wandering over to the living room he found his best friend toying with one of his robot action figures left on a mantel on the far wall. Michael smiled, just watching as it looked like Brian was taking up another one, maybe about to do battle with each other. Brian paused, then bent one robot over, balanced precariously and arched the other one back just slightly and left it placed behind the bent over robot.

"This is why I never let you play with my toys," Michael said, irritated now as he entered the room. Brian's shoulders jerked slightly, the only way to know he was surprised and back away from his work of art with a smile.

"Aw, Mikey, you know your mom always said you needed to share more," the taller man said laughing.

Michael scowled and righted the wronged figures, adjusting them until he was satisfied. "You're still a jackass."

"That bug up your butt?" Brian asked, getting annoyed with the treatment Michael was giving him. "You should tell it to move out."

Finished rearranging the toys, Michael stepped back. "Can we just go and get this over with now? I said I'd be home early."

"You're really not gonna come to Babylon with us?"

"I have work in the morning."

"So do I."

"Brian," Michael warned in a final tone. "Don't push me. Woody's, then home."

"So, tomorrow we can go see the gallery," Justin said, sipping at the coffee he'd ordered after their meal. "The mornings are usually quiet, afternoons are a little busier and at night it's a fifty-fifty shot of running into a crowd or not."

Brian had complained once they had walked over five blocks, sneered at the menu and then had gone relatively silent during the course of the meal. The blond had poked and prodded with useless questions, but nothing had broken the silence that had seemed to consume the older man. He didn't have an agenda for being here (well… maybe, but that was more a passing fancy his libido seemed to press on him that died once Justin had latched onto him in the lobby) and not that he regretted this reprieve from home, but did he really want to spend it here with Justin talking?

"Mm, maybe the afternoon," Brian finally answered. "I was thinking you'd rather show me the nightlife of the big apple."

Justin grinned. "I could show you something interesting to do with your night."

Cocky little fucker, Brian thought, raising an eyebrow. There was a tiny moment of familiarity that passed, and was gone quickly when he thought about how he'd left Michael in a rush that afternoon.

"That's really not on my itinerary," Brian said smoothly. He watched the young man's face fall.

"Everyone else might be good enough, though?"

"It's… not that."

The blond paused for a minute before a flicker of shock crossed his face. He leaned forward and lowered his voice. "Everything's okay, right? I mean… the can-"

"That's not a problem, Justin," Brian ground out. He didn't like thinking about the cancer. He'd been free and clean for awhile now, no problems in or out of bed. He didn't need any reminders of it. "I'd rather just spend a night having some fun, wouldn't you?"

"Something's different," Justin commented, sitting back and looking at the older man hard, as if he could see what it was.

"It's been a hard few weeks," Brian shrugged, leaning back into his seat. "This is kind of a little mini-vacation."

"With your ex."

"If you have to call yourself something, it may as well be that." Brian couldn't possibly get the young man to change his mind.

Justin sighed. "Part of me hoped… well, whatever. I'd still like to think you could talk to me."

"Am I not doing that now?"

"About whatever's bothering you and sending you running out this way," Justin snapped, crossing his arms. "Because I know you wouldn't show up out of the blue to see my first show. Not that you aren't supportive in your own bastard way, but it's not your thing."

Brian rolled the idea around in his head. Technically, Justin was out of the way enough to confide in, and Brian knew he still had a bit of a hold over the blond to keep him from talking to anyone else from back home. He did seem to be out one best friend for this situation and maybe…

"Well, if you can keep your mouth shut," Brian said casually, watching the younger man sit up a little straighter to pay attention. "I supposed I could use someone to talk to."

"After all that time together, you think you couldn't trust me?" Justin asked, almost haughty with puffed up indignation.

"Did I say that?"

"No, but-"

"Then shut the hell up. If I didn't trust you, I'd tell you. This is just… a fairly delicate situation and you've handled delicate like a screeching harpy before."

Justin rolled his eyes. "I get the point. So, do you think I can handle delicate now?"

"Figured you might be picking up Justin or something instead of me," Michael said as they drove towards Liberty Ave.

"Oh, I didn't get time to tell you," Brian said as he made an easy right turn. "Justin's staying at a hotel nearby. He'll probably be there now. Actually, considering how late we are, he is."

"He's not staying with you?"

Brian lifted an eyebrow. "Why the hell would he?"

Michael had so many half-assed answers ready for that, he couldn't decide which one to use first. He sorted through them and slowly come to the realization that Brian didn't lie. Really, he didn't. He said things he didn't mean, used things in his favor, but when it came down to it, he was always honest about most things. This probably wasn't a set up of any sort and Justin really was here to visit and surprise everyone.

"Never mind," Michael muttered, more annoyed with himself now than Brian.

There was no easy way to get back into a comfortable flow of conversation with only a minute or two left on the drive, so neither tried. Michael stared out his window and Brian kept his gaze on the traffic ahead. They had been making good time until they hit Liberty Ave and slowed immediately as queens paraded down the streets in a casual manner, not caring if the road was actually for cars and not queers. Brian huffed impatiently as he waited every few seconds for a high heeled drag queen to strut by, or a barely clothed group skittered into the road. It was annoying to drive in this area, but the tension was relieved by the time Brian had found a parking spot.

"You think this place would die down a bit on a Sunday," Michael commented, shutting the car door behind him after climbing out.

Brian locked the car and slung an arm over Michael's shoulders as they hit the sidewalk. "Mikey, any chance for those of the queer kind to get out will be taken."

"It still seems like, I dunno, they'd still be like everyone else," the shorter man contemplated.

"What? You mean like the heteros?" Brian said snidely. "Bed by nine?"

Michael sighed. "It's not just straight people that like to get to bed early, Brian."

"Oh, I'm sorry, married couples too. Stepford Fags."

"Brian," Michael warned.

"Alright, cool it," the taller man gave up, too exasperated to get into another fight so soon. The walk towards the bar was fairly content after that, just enjoying the usual sights and sounds.

A realization dawned on Michael. "Y'know what, Brian?"

"No, what?"

"Ass. I think this is probably the first time we've been to Woody's in awhile."

"You mean together."

"Even as a group."

"Nope."

"What?" Michael looked up questioningly.

"We've been going every once in awhile, guess who's been missing?"

"You guys have been leaving me out?"

"No, Mikey, you pulled yourself away. The guys ask about you, but I just stopped trying after awhile."

"Maybe I'm just getting old," Michael groused.

"Yeah, keep telling yourself that," Brian agreed, ready to drop the subject as they came to the brightly lit entrance of Woody's. They headed up the short steps and into the bar, finding no one with their group at the bar, tables or pool tables. The place wasn't empty, but one might think it a slow night until they heard the clapping and cheers from the area that was slightly downstairs. The second bar, pool tables and… oh crap, the stage.

"Karaoke," they both sighed.

Brian regaled, built up and crushed Justin all at once with his stoic storytelling. The edge of nervousness in his voice and the long pauses he took when explaining the encounter with Michael the next day took Justin by surprise. He couldn't tell if Brian was having a hard time spitting out exactly what happened or was trying to think of a way to make himself come out on top in the story. It might've been both.

Justin liked Michael. It took them awhile, but he had thought they eventually became friends. With all the help and support that the man had given him in the end, before moving to New York, how could he not have finally seen what everyone else did? Michael may have been overprotective of his best friend, mistaken longtime feelings or what have you, but they had reached an understanding at some point, finding a bond with each other.

Still, something like defeat entered the blond when he heard the story. He hadn't been able to keep thoughts of him and Brian starting something again, especially with that call out of the blue. That should've been his first clue. Whenever Brian had tried to pursue him in some manner, it had always been in that distant, casual way. Justin realized he had a better chance with his hopeful fantasy if Brian had just showed up at the gallery without pretense or warning.

"It's just been a tense buildup towards getting back to normal," Brian sighed, tapping the table with agitated fingers.

Justin came back to the conversation, realizing he was supposed to play the friend role now. "Oh, well… that sucks."

Brian gave the blond a hard look. "Looks like I'm stuck in this alone, then." Translation: Your head is too far up your ass to help me after all I did for you?

"Shit, sorry," Justin stumbled. "It's just… so weird to take in. I mean, you and Michael. Really? And nothing exploded?"

"I kind of expected that to happen too," Brian said in an amused tone, almost a hint of a smile. "And the friendship is still there… sort of. I'm not really sure if we're faking it until we get back to the real thing, or this is how it's going to be from now on."

"You guys doing anything different?"

"Nah. Woody's on the weekends and then Babylon. Random shit, the usual."

"What's to fake then? That's how you guys always were."

Brian paused to think about this. The motions were right, sure. "It doesn't feel right. It feels like we're trying. That… doesn't happen. Not us."

"You can't really do anything but wait it out," Justin told Brian simply. "I mean, what happened was weird. For you two, it was wrong."

"Watch it, Sunshine-"

"No, see, that's what I mean," the blond said, waving a hand at Brian. "Not saying you two together, or what happened, was wrong. But you two always thought it was."

"Well, it's not supposed to happen," Brian blurted out. He blinked in surprise before trying to regain his composure.

Justin shook his head gently. "But why isn't it supposed to happen?"

"You don't fuck your friends."

"You fuck anything."

"Except my friends."

"Hasn't Michael always been your exception?" Justin couldn't even pretend to his the scathing tone in his voice.

"Justin," Brian warned, giving the young man a hard look. "It's just not supposed to happen."

"Why? Because you grew up together?" he asked, and pressed on before Brian could answer. "Because you two are 'best friends'? Some people say that you can't even date before you're friends."

"I don't-"

"Shut up, I know. Listen, the point is, you both have this weird stigma about sleeping together and now that it happened and you're both realizing that nothing bad is going to happen, you're both trying to adjust to that fact rather than then both your lives being torn apart," Justin rationalized.

It made sense in a weird way. They both went into the next day expecting they would have to try so hard to go back to normal. Did that mean sleeping together was normal? Why put it off for so long then? Brian never wanted to hurt Michael the way he knew he had hurt Justin, because he knew Michael would've clung to Brian in the same way. Well, maybe not as persistently or annoyingly, but he would have nonetheless.

"So, just let it go?" Brian asked slowly, taking the bill from the waitress and sliding a card into the little book without glancing at the total.

Justin nodded. "You may as well. Has anything changed?"

"Not really."

"Then let it go, forget about it and move on," the blond told Brian with finality. "What about Ben?"

Brian sneered. "What about him?"

"You fucked his husband."

"And his 'husband' isn't telling, so what's to worry about?"

Just couldn't keep the shock off his face. "Michael's not going to tell Ben? Really?"

"That's what he says anyway," Brian shrugged, flipping the book open when it was handed back and signing for the card. He slipped his card and receipt into this wallet and left the book on the edge of the table.

"What do you think? You know Michael best."

"I think he's going tell. It's just how Mikey is," the older man said after some thought. "He keeps it to himself for awhile and then blurts it out. Almost like someone else I know…"

"Oh, fuck you," Justin said pleasantly, smiling.

"Nah, that was a onetime deal," Brian shot back. "C'mon, show me around."

Brian and Michael headed downstairs, standing by the entrance as the floor and tables were crowded. They could see Ted and Justin over by the bar, clapping and hooting as Emmett climbing on the stage and taking the offered microphone. The crowd joined into the cheering, more than a few knew Emmett and the ones that didn't were just enjoying themselves being caught up in the shows of the night.

Emmett didn't wait or do any prelude to his song. When the music started, so did he. "You say you love me," the lean man sung softly. "And I hardly know your name."

The crowd tittered, as did the four men who knew Emmett's fantasies with true love.

His voice got stronger now, belting out the lyrics. "And if I say I love you, in the candlelight… there's no one but myself to blame."

Michael and Brian started laughing, leaning into each other. Not loud enough to disrupt the song, but enough to remember the time Emmett had found his one true love at Babylon. They had spent all of an hour together before 'breaking up'. If you could even call it that.

"But there's something inside that's turnin' my mind away," Emmett lowered his voice again before raising it back up with the music. "Oh how I could love you! If I could let you stay."

The laughter subsided between the two, feeling a little awkward. Michael shifted on his feet and Brian leaned back against the wall. What a fucking song choice. Brian didn't want to think about it, this situation he'd put themselves in and with Justin here, it was just throwing grease on the fire. Fucking karaoke night. Fucking Emmett.

It's late – but I'm bleeding deep inside

It's late – is it just my sickly pride?

Too late – even now the feeling seems to steal away

So late – though I'm crying I can't help but hear you say

"It's only four," Brian exclaimed when Justin pulled him out of the club. "Besides, there was that guy at the bar, Sunshine. You know better."

Justin wheeled around to face Brian. He was angry, mildly annoyed maybe. "Brian, this isn't the Pitts, I don't just have school tomorrow and you weren't going to take that fucker back to your room."

"Maybe I should've shared with you," the older man said absently, thinking about the drugs he'd ingested while Justin had run off to play on the dance floor. He had thought about it, but the risk of winding up in bed with the blond outweighed the need for fun and company in his haze.

"Kinney," Justin said sternly. "That was our dynamic back then. This is where I live now. I have to be at the gallery tomorrow at ten and somehow manage to work on a few things before then and you've gotten yourself worked into such a fucking stupor I doubt you could even get it up!"

Brian seemed to accept this offer. "Wanna find out?"

It's late it's late it's late

But not too late

"The way you love me is the sweetest love around," Emmett crooned to the audience, getting into his usual stage presence, directing it at a fairly attractive man sitting at a table at the front of the stage who was with, probably, a boyfriend. The boyfriend gave Emmett a roll of his eyes. "But after all this time, the more I'm trying the more I seem to let you down."

Brian put an arm around Michael, pulling him close. Michael wasn't sure what to do with himself. He tucked his hands into his jean pockets, trying not to lean too much into the taller man. It was silly, really. Trying to find some way to keep distance between them. Why should they? Ben was at home, their friends were all here and weren't they always with each other anyway?

"Now you tell me you're leaving, and I just can't believe it's true," Emmett sang, spotting Michael and Brian in the back and giving them a little wave. They smiled back, acknowledging the wave. Ted and Justin turned around and saw the two. They didn't make a move towards the two in the back. It was too crowded and neither pair wanted to miss Emmett's performance. "Oh! You know that I can love you, though I know I can't be true."

Justin had a few drinks that night, sure. Maybe a little hit of something offered on the floor, but to actually take Brian up on his offer after what was confessed to him? Could he really? Well, it seemed that way as he got a cab. The blond told himself it wasn't anything but getting Brian back to his hotel. Walking him through the lobby was necessary as Brian was more likely to deviate off the course if left alone. The elevator was when it got weird, though.

"Mikey always picks up after me," Brian sighed, slumping against one reflective wall of the lift. "He was making sure I got home okay that night."

"He loves you," Justin said, tired.

Brian made a childish raspberry noise. "Nah. He's got Big Ben for that."

"Doesn't mean he can't love you."

"Who?"

Justin sighed. Brian could usually stay on track with his stoned ramblings, but he was too out of it with his life to begin with to think drugs would help him. The blond helped Brian to his room, watching the older man fumble repeatedly with the card key, always just missing that little green light that told him the door was unlocked. It took Brian five tries before he was able to turn the handle at the right time to open the door. Brian stumbled into the dark and Justin followed behind and turned on the light. He couldn't help but be surprised. Brian often liked to go out in style as it were, the blond couldn't help but guess that this was all so last minute, there wasn't enough time to get something more to his standard.

There was a large king sized bed in the middle of the room, the bathroom right near the door with a small vanity area inside that, a TV across the bed and a desk nearby with a chair tucked into a corner along the same wall as the bed. Then again, Justin thought, with so many hotels aiming for keeping more people and not how good the rooms looked this probably was one of the better rooms.

Brian had flopped over on the bed. "Cynthia booked it. Told her I needed the biggest bed, she made a dirty joke."

"Cynthia was always good like that," Justin smiled. "How is she?"

"Good. She'd probably take my job if I wasn't the boss."

Justin laughed. "You liked her for that."

"She's honest, too," Brian added. "I like that."

"I know you do."

"He's lying."

"You think so?" Justin figured they were going on another tangent now.

"Yep," Brian sighed, sitting up to peel off his shirt, the button down having fluttered to the floor at the bottom of the bed. He tossed the white undershirt to the floor and laid back down. "Said he was over me. Was. So if he was then, what is he now?"

Justin shrugged and sat on the edge of the bed. God, it was too early for this shit. And he lived a few (New York) blocks away. The blond glanced over his shoulder when he heard rustling and found Brian getting off the bed and undoing his pants, fluidly slipping them off and stepping out of them. He turned to Justin, arms out, almost proudly displaying the erection Justin said he wouldn't've been able to get. For a moment, the young man thought of his first time back at the Loft.

Oh you made me love you

Don't tell me that we're through

"It's late – but it's driving me so mad," Emmett sang, and some people in the crowd join in. "It's late – yes I know but don't try to tell me that it's, too late – save our love you can't turn out the lights, so late – I've been wrong but I'll learn to be right!"

"I'm starting to hate Queen," Michael muttered, crossing his arms over his chest.

Brian smiled thinly. "You were more of an ABBA fan anyway, Mikey."

"Even you like Dancing Queen!"

"I like dancing with you to Dancing Queen."

Michael settled down again, resting more on Brian than before. Had a stranger walked by, they might have assumed them a regular couple rather than friends who were trying to act normal in mixed company. Emmett was loving the attention on stage, always a performer in his own right.

"Did you give Ben an answer yet?" Brian asked, unconsciously tightening his hold around Michael's shoulders.

"It's late, it's late, it's late, but not too late!"

I've been so long

"That's very nice, Brian," Justin said patiently. "Time for bed."

"You're not my mother," Brian said, posture deflating and taking on more of a protective one. But he did settle himself back down on the bed. Justin tried, but couldn't keep his eyes off Brian. It wasn't like they had spent so much time away from each other, but enough where he wanted to remember everything.

"I wouldn't want to be, she's frigid," the blond retorted, slipping off his shoes and sliding up to the head of the bed to lay next to Brian.

Brian barked out a laugh, rolling on his side to face Justin. "And you are nothing of the sort."

"I learned well," Justin agreed, turning on his side to face Brian. "I miss you a lot."

There was a moment of silence, Brian's eyes taking the time to search the young man's face before he seemed to come to a decision on what to say. The kid had been annoying, persistent, intrusive and in his way. But, in a lot of ways, Justin had been his first in many things. Things he wanted to avoid the rest of his life (after his gym teacher) and found himself thinking fondly back on them. They shared that, those firsts, and Brian wished, for a moment, that things could be as disruptively easy as that again.

"What would've happened if we had the wedding?" Brian asked and Justin looked startled at the question.

You've been so long

"I'm still holding out that he'll leave the book home," Michael said, shifting uncomfortably in the embrace.

"Do you want to go?"

"Doesn't he deserve a chance?"

Brian held back a sigh, instinctively pulling Michael closer to him. "I dunno, Mikey. Does he?"

"We've been so long, tryin' to work it out!" Emmett sang dramatically, the crowd cheering him on.

I ain't got long

"I don't know if you would've been happy," Justin admitted. "You were trying so hard to be… I dunno, like Ben? A husband in the technical sense."

Brian made a face at being related to Ben, but there was some truth to it. "Would you've been happy?"

The blond sighed. "I don't know. I love you, Brian. Not who you were trying to be. I would've been… No. No, I don't think I could've been happy to marry the real you. And I hate to think of you holding back, so we wouldn't've been happy either way."

"Find anyone here?"

"There's no shortage," Justin said. "But, nothing long standing. It's hard to find that middle ground."

"What middle ground?"

"I left Ethan because he lied to me, you never did and trying to find that again in a relationship with no fucking around on the side… it's hard," the younger man sighed.

"Why do you want it?" Brian asked, honestly curious. He never understood the need people had to be with someone.

"Maybe it's the romantic in me, I don't know. I can't explain it when I know you don't understand it," Justin said.

"Mikey said once that he didn't want to be alone," Brian murmured. "That's crap. I'm here. I'm always here."

You ain't got long

"Brian, don't start," Michael said, trying to end the conversation as best he could. He felt Brian tense up. There was no end in sight.

"Why shouldn't I?" he demanded, frowning as he kept his eyes on the stage. "I didn't think this was going to be so fucking hard for you. It's Ben. You've been married to this man, living with him, for how long now? How much has changed?"

"Maybe because I haven't given it a chance to change," Michael shot back.

Brian sighed. "Do you want it to change?"

"Why wouldn't I? I love him and at some point, I loved him enough to try and spend the rest of my life with him."

"We gotta know what this life is all about!" Emmett flailed on stage for the musical interlude.

"But it's different," Justin insisted. "You love him, but you won't stay with him."

"Hey, I've fucking been there since we were kids," Brian spat.

"No, in a relationship. He loves you, but he wants someone to give him everything and give that right back."

"I give him a lot."

"Do you share your bed with him?"

"I did… at some point," Brian muttered.

"Every night, Brian. Would you be there to come home to every night or would you be out at the clubs? Would you want to keep it in the bedroom, or spend your time in the backroom? Would you really want to have dinner at home, leave work early, raise your kids together?" Justin demanded, voice getting more accusatory as the list went on.

Brian grunted and rolled onto his back, staring at the ceiling. Justin did the same. They were getting worked up over nothing.

"Hey."

Justin rolled his eyes. "What?"

"Are you staying the night?"

Too late much too late

Michael looked up at Brian, obviously torn between annoyed and hurt. "You shouldn't care so much."

"Mikey, why the fuck wouldn't I care?" Brian asked, sounding annoyed. "I never wanted you with him in the first place."

Emmett's voice came in when the music timed just right. "You're staring at me, with suspicion in your eye. You say 'What game are you playing? What's this that you're saying?' I know that I can't reply."

"Why is Justin here, Brian?" Michael asked quietly. "Why the fuck is he here and why do you visit him so damn much?"

"What are you-"

"You think I don't fucking know?! You think I didn't know that you went to New York for his first show? I'm not fucking dumb, Brian! And every few months after that, or whenever a show was in the city. You suddenly had out of town business. How was it?" Michael asked, changing gears.

Brian was caught off guard. "How was what?"

"Your out of town 'business'. Was it good? Everything you remembered?"

"If I take you tonight, is it making my life a lie?" Emmett crooned in a low voice, almost sad until the music picked back up.

Brian looked at Michael, all fury and nothing like forgiveness in his eyes as they stared at each other. Guilt pulled at Brian. For never telling Michael about the trips, now for having Justin show up out of the blue. He never expected Michael to blow up about it, but that didn't matter, he shouldn't've done it to begin with.

Oh you make me wonder

Did I live my life right?

There was a long moment of pause between the two, Brian still staring up at the ceiling, Justin on his back with his head turned to stare at Brian in disbelief. Really? Was he really asking that? Justin got off the bed and reach for the light switch, pulling off his clothing in the dark. It wouldn't be the first time he'd run late somewhere or wear the same clothes due to passing out in exhaustion. He was an artist. It was half expected.

The bed dipped again and Justin climbed under the covers this time, leaving Brian to his own devices for the time being.

"Brian?" the blond asked softly and again when there was no answer.

"Yeah?"

"Did you love me?"

"I wouldn't've said it unless I did."

It's late – but it's time to set me free

"Michael, calm down," Brian said under his breath.

Michael visibly tried to hold himself back. "I don't hate him."

"I know. You treated him better than I did."

"He reminded me of myself."

"I know."

"It's late – yes I know but there's no way it has to be," Emmett's voice rang out.

Too late – so let the fire take our bodies this night

There were three times in Justin's young life that he could say Brian had made love to him. Three. They were together for so long, it should've been more, but that wasn't Brian's style no matter how hard he tried. There was his first time, slow and informative. It was good, but mostly for Brian's pleasure. The night Justin had left for New York was next, on the couch for what felt like hours in the dark with the street lights coming in through the window. And now. He tried to tell himself that he didn't want to. He was going to bed, after all it was five, well… almost six in the morning. Work was more important than an old flame, right?

Justin would admit, when recounting the story to new close friends, that the night he left there was something oddly final about it. This was it, the end. If anything, keeping the rings like Brian had fueled his hope, but the sex… that changed his mind. He knew that Brian had kept the rings to give himself hope more than anything, that Brian had walked away from this relationship learning something, even if he hadn't wanted to. Just like that night, there was no way he could've stopped it. It just happened.

Something about Brian still pulled at him, even though he knew it was wrong. You didn't take advantage of someone in a weak moment, and that's what Brian was having. But wasn't it a need with the older man? Wasn't it how he handled his problems? If Justin had withheld, wouldn't he have been the worse person for not helping the only way Brian knew how to help himself?

He didn't know. They were only half formed thoughts in his head, unable to find answers when Brian was inside him, making cautious eye contact in the dark. The older man made slow drawn out movements, almost in a way that Justin would've found contemplative if he hadn't been too busy and eager to meet the thrusts. The blond had hoped, wanted this for so long from Brian, but knowing it wasn't going to last, it wasn't meant to be… he pushed that aside and enjoyed himself. That's what sex was for, right?

So late – let the waters take our guilt in the tide

"Mikey, it's not what you think," Brian said simply. It was true. Once or twice, maybe. But he'd pretty much steered away from blonds in his bed from then on.

"What is it then?" Michael demanded, sticking to the argument.

Time to change gears. "Why would it matter? You're still with Ben."

The seemed to strike Michael dumb, as if he'd never thought about that. Did he really think Brian was going to be satisfied with just him? Was that what he was really going to get himself into, a relationship like Justin's had been with him? That wasn't fair though. He was still with Ben, still sharing a bed with him. He couldn't claim innocence.

"It's… him," was all Michael could come up with. "Anyone else, fine, Brian. But… Justin?"

"It's late, it's late, it's late, it's late," Emmett sang, pitch rising and falling with the music. "It's late, it's late, it's late, it's late."

Brian sighed, wrapping Michael in a full hug now. There was no polite way to explain it, not in public anyways. The taller man tucked his head down, resting his cheek on his own arms that held Michael by the shoulders. Hesitantly, Michael looped his own arms around Brian's waist.

"Is this… Is this it?" Michael asked, voice trembling just slightly. "Is that why he's here?"

"Oh, fuck," Justin gasped, writhing under the older man as he rode the blond hard and fast at this point. Tales of Brian's sexual prowess was greatly exaggerated except for a few things. First, his partners always walked away without complaint and second was that he could last. Not the fabled hours upon hours that circulated among the masses (some claimed days), but longer than most.

Brian took his time, already familiar with Justin. Building him up at a steady pace, panting as he easily brought the young man to his first orgasm, working into him further to reach his own. He didn't want to think or remember. He didn't want to see Michael crushed look when he bolted out of the office, or remember how his nose kid of scrunched up in a cute way when he came. Fuck, he didn't need this. There was an ass, a great one, right under him available to him, easy to get… Fuck, Michael. He didn't need this.

Unfortunately, just like that Brian stopped. Justin, disoriented, eventually looked up at Brian completely confused until he felt it. Oh fucking hell, if it wasn't going to be awkward before when it ended, it sure as hell was now. Brian had gone completely soft, swearing up a storm as he slipped out of Justin and slammed his way into the bathroom leave Justin in the dark to what had just happen. Brian was here, hard and close to his own climax and now he locked himself in the bathroom?

"Brian?" the blond called out, not willing to move from the bed. "Brian, everything okay?"

"Shut the fuck up, Sunshine," Brian barked through the bathroom door. Justin heard some clattering around behind the door, bottles being moves around or searched through, a loud thump that made him sit straight up on the bed.

"Shit, Brian, what the hell are you doing in there, fucking the wall?"

There was a muffled answer from behind the door and more slamming. Justin got off the bed and tapped cautiously on the door, calling the other man's name. The door swung open, startling the young blond, forgetting just how intimidating Brian could look when he jumped between moods.

"Uh… is everything alright?" Justin asked, tongue fumbling over the words.

"I fucking lied to him," Brian said. "I fucking lied to him and now I'm here and look at what I'm doing!"

What you aren't doing anymore, Justin thought, backing away a bit to let Brian walk by if he was going to. Brian stayed where he was.

"You think I could change?" Brian asked seemingly no one, obviously not waiting for an answer. "If I wanted to, I probably could. This bullshit about people saying 'for the right person'. I didn't get it. I don't think I get it now."

"Maybe you should lay down, Brian," Justin suggested, motioning towards the bed. "You're strung out and tired."

"Fuck you, I'm not."

"You were fucking me! What the hell happened?"

"Shut up, you got off."

"Yeah, but-"

"Drop it, Sonny Boy."

"Brian, don't you-"

"Fucking drop it!" Brian shouted, slammed the side of his fist against the doorjamb. Justin jumped. "What the fuck do you want from me?"

The blond tried to screw up some courage, but he was taken so off guard it was hard. "I want you to go get in bed and get some fucking sleep!"

Brian paused, seeming to think about it now. "Yeah. Yeah, that's probably better." He ran a hand through his hair, the anger seeming to dissipate immediately as he crossed the small distance to the bed. Justin shut off the bathroom light, but noticed the scattered contents on the vanity table under the mirror that held the sink. Justin saw Brian's phone among the items, flipped open. He didn't want to guess what had happened.

When Justin got back into bed, Brian was on his side facing away. It was expected after that tantrum. But, Justin left it alone, settling down and letting exhaustion wash over him. Just as the blond was about to fall asleep he heard Brian say something.

"Sorry."

It's all too late

Brian sighed, smiling just faintly. "No, Mikey, that's not why he's here. C'mon, let's go congratulate the princess."

They pulled apart, the crowd cheering as Emmett took his bows, Ted helping him off stage when he was done, Justin embracing the tall man tightly. From the back of the room, both Brian and Michael could see Emmett flailing about in his usual excited flamboyant manner in greeting the blond. Ted was clapping the young man on the shoulder, smiling from ear to ear, obviously talking Justin's ear off about something.

"Hey, we almost didn't see you from back there," Ted said, giving Michael a kiss on the cheek and Brian an offhanded pat on the arm. Emmett practically squealed, diving for Michael, mouth going a mile a minute about how great it was to be on stage, how wonderful the song was and on and on. Emmett could talk circles around anyone when he was really going.

"And, oh my god, honey," Emmett exclaimed, hands fluttering as he leaned back and tittered. "Did you see that cutie in the front row?"

"The one with the boyfriend?" Michael asked wryly.

Emmett made a noise like air escaping, clearly blowing off the supposed boyfriend. "Please, Michael. If that's his boyfriend, then he's doing something wrong cause that hottie had wandering eyes and they were all over this body."

"What's it like to be back after getting all famous on us poor schmucks?" Ted laughed, sipping his beer while Justin gave him a smile.

"It's… weird," the blond admitted. "Not like I expect instant recognition or anything, but… it's like stepping back in time. I almost feel seventeen again."

"Sunshine, you will never be seventeen again," Brian stated firmly. "You're already getting wrinkles."

"Asshole!" Justin said, hitting Brian in the arm. "I'm still just as perfect as I was the night you met me, admit it." He lifted his chin in classic teenage-like defiance.

"Oh, sweetie," Emmett gushed, putting an arm over Justin's shoulders. "I know we raised you to have a high opinion of yourself, but… tone it down? Just a little?"

All five men laughed before heading upstairs to the main bar as the next singer was starting. They were better for it as the poor guy sounded like nails on a chalkboard. Glancing back, Emmett and Michael laughed, holding on to each other when they realized it was the boyfriend trying to sing a love song to the cutie in the front row, who was obviously embarrassed.

"Beers all around," Brian told the bartender while Emmett and Ted went to line up a pool table. The two of them didn't play much, but they knew Brian and Michael would wander over to it at some point, maybe Justin, depending. The three men let a silence fall over them as they shared a drink, clearly an uncomfortable point settled in between them as they realized that each of them had no idea what to say.

"Sorry for being late," Michael said finally, looking at Justin. "Brian was-"

"Don't you put this on me, Mikey," Brian shook his head, turning to Justin. "He was busy spending 'quality time' with the hubby."

The blond was obviously confused. With all the phone calls and emails and drunk dials (and there had been quite a few of those), he was left looking at one and then the other, smiling in that slightly confused manner. Justin had assumed that the two would be more… couple like in person without Ben around. Michael's face fell and he looked at Brian.

"He knows?" Michael demanded.

"Mikey-"

"Was I not supposed to?" Justin asked, shrugging.

"Brian, you're a fucking moron!"

"Hey, c'mon Mich-"

"Sunshine," Brian said and that shut him up, focused back on Michael now. "I was down a best friend, what was I supposed to do?"

"I was here!" Michael insisted.

Brian sighed, closed his eyes and tried to remember to be patient. "Mikey, you were what I needed to talk about. How could I do that with you?"

"I-" Michael paused to think about it. He didn't want to get replaced in any sense with Brian, especially with the title that he held for so long. "Yeah."

Brian rolled his eyes and pulled Michael over to him, arm around his shoulders. "You're still my best friend, Michael. Stop pouting."

"I'm not pouting," the shorter man muttered and Justin tried to hide a smile by taking a sip of his beer. Michael was pouting.

"So… I take it no one else knows, then?" Justin asked cautiously this time.

Brian shook his head. "Not a chance. I was betting on the wrong horse when I said Mikey would spill it."

"You don't think I could keep a secret?" Michael asked, still irked. "Especially one that would rui- Hey, guys!" Emmett and Ted came back over to the bar and took the two beers left on the bar top. Emmett made a dramatic role of his eyes. He'd rather a Cosmo, of course.

"We got a table," Ted explained their return.

Emmett did a happy wiggle of his hips. "And a number," he added in a singsong voice.

"Who's the poor sap this time, Honeycutt?" Brian asked, letting Michael go.

"My name is not Honeycutt," the taller man said, giving Brian a glare with eyeliner enhanced eyes. "And it's not me. It's Teddy!"

"What about Blake?" Michael asked.

"Oh, honey, as soon as a man is taken, the rest of them just wanna eat him up!" Emmett exclaimed, rubbing Ted's back affectionately as he laughed.

Ted gave an awkward shrug. "The attention's nice, but I like what I've got."

"I still can't believe you two are together," Justin said in an admiring tone. "Think you'll get married?"

Ted snorted. "Yeah, sure. The day they legalize marriage for gays here will be a cold day in hell."

"Proposition 14 just barely got turned down as it is," Emmett agreed solemnly.

All five men took a moment think. Prop 14 seemed so long ago. Brian had put his arm around Michael again, remembering them wheeling him into the back of ambulance. Trying to beat the living shit out of the doctor who refused to let him give blood and finding Justin later that night to tell him that he loved him. Justin remembered the same thing, reaching out to touch Brian's arm gently. Ted and Emmett watched the three of them and Emmett took Justin's hand and put his arm around Ted. It was better that they were able to remember, they had realized, than to be dead. As sad as it was, it was true and they were grateful.

"Alright, who's getting their ass kicked?" Michael asked, breaking up the silence.

Brian snorted. "You mean by me?"

"Here they go," Ted said, rolling his eyes. The three men watched the two best friends go set up their game, throwing insults back and forth at each other.

"Oh, honey," Emmett said to Justin, who was leaning up against the bar. "How's the big city? Find anyone?"

Justin smiled and set the beer down. "Well, there's no shortage of work. People are jumping through hoops to get my pieces. The nightlife is great. You guys should all come out to visit me there's-"

Emmett gave him a stern look. "Sweetie. Did. You. Find. Anyone."

"Em, leave him alone," Ted told Emmett. "Why's it so important?"

"No, it's fine," the blond insisted. "Emmett loves getting into people's business, that's why it's important. And-"

"And," Emmett interrupted. "I want to make sure you're not still playing hopeless romantic. That's my job."

"Hey, I'm sure he'll find someone when it's right," Ted offered. "That's how it happened for me."

"Yes, well," the tall man said briskly. "Not everyone can find a Twe- generous person like Blake turned out to be, honey."

"What happened to that guy from your town, Em?" Justin asked, trying not to giggle at the almost slip. "It seemed like you might've had something. A little piece of home."

Emmett laughed. "Well, a little something is right. Oh, no, not really I guess." He was just so used to being the snarky bitch. "Things just… didn't go. It's alright, though. I'll find someone in my own time, but what about you?"

"Well, that's why I'm here," Justin admitted to Emmett and Ted's surprise.

"Justin… c'mon," Ted said cautiously.

"Honey, don't tell me… still?" Emmett asked.

Justin didn't get it at first, and then it hit him. "What? No! Oh, shit, I mean he's with-"

Oh. Uh-oh. Shit, shit, shit.

"Honey, are you okay?" Emmett asked. "You know we mean Brian, right? He's not with anyone."

"Wait a minute," Ted said, thinking about it. "Come to think of it, when was the last time Brian hit the backroom?"

"Teddy, Brian's probably getting it in the VIP lounge he made back when he bought Babylon," Emmett said, exasperated.

"I dunno, Em-"

"Oh, god, you know Brian," Justin said. "He's probably found some place new."

"Exactly," Emmett agreed. "Anyways, so why are you here if it's not Brian?"

"It's a secret," the blond explained to Emmett's outraged shock. "Don't worry! I'm setting something up. It's a surprise for everyone."

"Well, I guess good luck," Ted told the younger man. "C'mon, let's check on the Wonder Twins."

Brian was leaning up against the side of the pool table that Michael was trying to line his shot up from. Michael was obviously annoyed as he was losing by a lot. He'd only gotten two balls in since the break and Brian would not let him live it down. Beer in one hand and pool stick in the other, Brian smiled with a familiar predatory look in his eye, glanced over at the bar and saw the group making their way over. He leaned over Michael as he was trying to make sure his aim was right and put his lips close to his best friend's ear.

"I know you're not wearing any underwear," Brian murmured. Michael jumped and his cue hit the ball, that hit the eight ball with a resounding crack and it flew across the table, skipped against the rim and flew off the table.

"Shit!" Michael yelled, thumping the end of his stick on the floor, face red.

"Whoa, Mikey, trying to kill everyone?" Brian laughed, standing up straight. "That makes game, and in my favor of course."

"You're an asshole, Kinney," Michael snapped sourly. "Rack 'em up again. I'll get you."

"I was hoping to get a round," Justin said, looking hopeful.

"Whatever, Boy Wonder," the shorter, flustered man said, passing his cue stick off. "He's a cheater anyways."

"Or maybe you're just a sore loser, Mikey," Brian said in a condescending manner. "Rack 'em, Sunshine."

Justin rolled his eyes and set up the table, Emmett soothing Michael out of his annoyed state (which, if you ask Brian, had been going on all fucking day). Ted made the conversation in between and Justin enhanced it with stories from New York while Brian catered to everyone's drinking needs for the night, spicing up the conversation with his own style of liners that just seemed too smooth to not be practiced. All in all, when ten (or maybe it was eleven, they were all rolling with laughter as the drinks kept coming, giving up on pool at some point) rolled around, they made their way out of the bar and onto the still busy streets in the night.

"Oh, shit, wait," Michael said, fishing his phone out of his pocket to check the time. "Guys, I gotta go."

"Aw, honey, just a little longer," Emmett pleaded. "A few hours at the club won't kill you. When was the last time you've been?"

"But I promised Ben I'd-"

"Fuck Ben," Brian announced loudly to the street. A man walked by and offered to be whoever Ben was for him if he wanted.

"Brian," Justin said in a calming tone. "If Michael said he'd go home, he should go. Gimme your keys and I'll take him. I'm good."

"I don't want him to," Brian admitted, clearly intoxicated beyond the point of controlling himself. "He always goes home, Sunshine. I don't want him to."

"Bri, I think you've had too much drinky," Ted told his boss in a singsong voice. "He's got 'maritals' to take care of. You've got a club full of waiting men."

"Ted, I don't think-" Justin was cut off.

"Theodore," Brian said clearly, straightening up. Obviously the alcohol couldn't hide the hard look of command he had. "Why don't you shut the fuck up? If I want Michael, it's my business."

The group met Brian with resounding silence on the loud street. Each were trying to work their muddled way through the alcohol and figure out what Brian had said and how he meant it. Did that mean foregoing the 'waiting men', as Ted put it, for Michael? Was he just missing a few words to clear this up due to alcohol? Because it sounded like-

"Honey, just give Justin the keys," Emmett said and started walking off down the club. Ted gave Brian one last look and followed after. Michael was left staring at Brian, who was trying to clear his head.

"Sonny Boy," Brian said, passing Justin the keys. "Scratch it and I'll have your balls."

"They're not yours to have," Justin quipped, taking the keys. "C'mon, Michael. I wanted to see Ben anyway."

"Fuck Ben!" Brian shouted, stalking off in the direction of Ted and Emmett. Michael and Justin watched his hunched form disappear in the mingling crowds.

"He's drunk," Justin said.

"I don't know what to do," Michael replied.

Justin gave Michael a questioning look, walking with him down the block in the opposite direction where Brian had parked. "What do you mean?"

"Ben wants a weekend away."

"Doesn't sound so bad. Oh, y'know what? You guys could do a Bed 'n' Breakfast thing! I've always wanted to do that," the blond said pleasantly.

Michael shook his head. "He won't leave his book at home if we go and Brian…"

"Oh, shit," Justin sighed. "That's right, he wants you to get rid of Ben."

"It sounds harsh when you say it that way."

"Is there any nice way to say that your secret lover wants you to ditch your husband?" Justin asked, shrugging. "It's life. It's Brian. But what do you want?"

"I kinda liked things the way they are," Michael confessed honestly. "I had the marriage and family part with Ben, then I still got what I wanted with Brian."

"Got your cake and ate it, too," Justin nodded. "Great feeling, isn't it?"

Michael's stomach rumbled, not willing to comment on just how great it was. "You wanna go to the diner first?"

"Is Deb working?"

"I don't think so. Horvath made her cut back to a regular schedule."

"Hah! How long is that gonna last this time?" Justin laughed as they turned a corner to head to the diner.

Michael smiled. "You know, Ma."

"Still a freak?"

"Still a freak."

"Won't be too long before she's running the place again, then," the blond decided. "Are they thinking about setting a date yet?"

Debbie and Horvath had been engaged for so long now that it seemed insane they would stay together without reason, but just the mere promise that one day, maybe, if the government allowed gays to marry, they would finally wed? Horvath might be waiting a long fucking time under Debbie's rule.

"I think he might be wearing her down," Michael admitted. "She's been positive since Prop 14 was shut down, but it's still not gay marriage. It could go either way if he plays it right."

"Well, you've got Ben, right?"

"I guess."

The entered the diner, slow and nearly empty as these were prime clubbing hours, Sunday or not. They took a booth and waited, enjoying the quiet from the insanity outside. Michael wondered if he was getting old if he found himself actually wanting the respite from the life he used to live here on Liberty Ave. Justin was thinking that maybe he had grown quite a bit seeing as he had no urge to dive headfirst back into the scene he once romanticized with Brian. Both men sat thinking in the silence as a waitress (or maybe a waiter…) brought them menus. They waved them off, going for burgers and fries. Justin with a soda and Michael with a milkshake.

"I didn't expect him to make me choose," Michael sighed, alcohol weighing heavily on him now. He was still hungry, but sleepy now too.

"I think, sometimes, he likes to keep things he wants," Justin said, wondering if it made any sense at all.

Michael snorted. "So I'm just something to keep? That he has all to himself, knowing I won't fuck around while he's out fucking the entire gay populous of Pittsburg?"

"He hasn't been doing that."

"Oh, c'mon, Boy Wonder. You're not so naïve, anymore. One hole to fill doesn't satisfy Brian Kinney."

"Maybe it takes the right hole."

"After all these years, I'm the right one?" Michael asked, grinning in a loopy manner. "It's like a perverted version of Cinderella. Only one ass is the right fit!"

Justin laughed, shaking his head. "Mike, c'mon, you know Brian better than anyone. You've been with him this last year. He has to have changed just a little."

"I dunno, you see him quite a bit yourself, don't you?" Michael shot back and the young man averted his eyes. "Yeah, exactly. How much could he have changed?"

"He was fucked up, Michael, and hurting."

"Yeah, he was fucked up when we did it, too. Doesn't really mean much, just reinforces the point."

"What point?" Justin asked, thanking the server for the soda. Michael sullenly played with the straw in his milkshake.

"That I'll never be enough," the smaller man shrugged, seeming to get smaller. "I just… I wanted it for so long, but I knew he could never… wouldn't commit. The most I could get was friendship, and I was grateful for it, but… well, he wavers on that, too."

"Where do you get that from?"

"My thirtieth birthday ring any bells?"

Justin worried his bottom lip between his teeth. "That was your mom."

"Nooo," Michael drew out. "That was the waiter… or, waitress. I forget. Ma's at home."

"No, Michael, your party," the blond clarified. "She asked, mm, well more like told, Brian to let you go so you and David would live happily ever after. Brian just did the usual and took it to the extreme."

"He does that a lot."

Justin stared at the man across from him. Was he just not listening? "Mike, you heard me, right? Your mother told Brian to ditch you. On your birthday."

"She's been warning us to stay away from each other since we met," Michael sighed, rolling his eyes. "I can't really be surprised, although, I take back what I said about Brian and my birthday because of it."

"Why do you let her do it?"

"She's my mom, what else can I do? I mean, it turned out fine in the end. Still friends and, hell, I even married a guy she approved of, even if it took some time."

"There are so many things wrong with that, I don't even know where to start," Justin said, nearly struck dumb. "I like Ben, Michael. And you know I love Deb, but… given the chance, really, would you have married Ben all over again?"

"I dunno. Would Brian and I still have eventually fucked?"

"Michael-"

"No," the shorter man said, sitting up straight. "Because what were my options? Find someone before I got old, or wind up in Palm Springs with Brian, best friends forever, two fat, old queens on the beach. You might've been there, too, if you guys hadn't called it off."

Justin rolled his eyes. "That never would have worked and everyone knew it."

"They didn't seem like it," Michael said. "They were cheering you two on all the way."

"Doesn't make them right. It just took them longer to figure it out," the blond laughed, leaning back as the server brought over their food. He was tempted to ask what, exactly, the person was seeing as their nametag only read 'Jamie', but thought better of it.

Michael was already digging into his fries. "Yeah, like you knew right away?" He snorted. Justin could sit at the grown up table now, but he was still a kid to Michael and playing off the relationship he'd had with Brian like he knew it was going to end the way it did… well, Michael didn't like it. That's a hindsight opinion, not what you knew during.

"I knew I loved him," Justin admitted. "But that's not enough."

"Why?"

Justin shrugged. "We didn't really know each other, we didn't understand each other… I mean, the list could go on. We met, we were attracted, I forced myself into his life, but I could never be a good longtime partner for Brian."

"What do you think it takes?" Michael asked, grabbing the ketchup on the table and adding a thick layer to his burger. "Everyone makes it seem like Brian is so fucking unattainable and even harder to keep. What does it take, in a survivor's opinion."

"Survivor," Justin smiled, adding salt to his fries. "Nice. I dunno. He needs someone who knows him, to take care of him. He needs that even if he won't admit it. I think he needs someone who's going to make him feel like it's really worth his time, that he's actually getting something worthwhile and not just giving."

"So, he wants it all about him?"

"It'll seem that way on the outside, but I think he would know better."

They ate in silence after that, alcohol clearing away from Michael's head, Justin catching a glance at his watch. It was almost one in the morning. Sure, the guys might still be at Babylon when he got back, but it was more likely Justin would be going back to his room for the night. He was more tired than he thought. After spending the afternoon with Brian and making plans to see Debbie and being treated to an early dinner, the young man was tired.

Michael waved over for the bill and Justin was reaching for his wallet. "Stuff it right back in there, Boy Wonder. You're a guest."

"Remember when you took me here after I went to find Brian again?" he asked, smiling as he tucked his wallet away.

"You called my mom a freak and insisted how magical sex with Brian was," the shorter man said, pulling out a few bills. "You can leave tip." Fair trade that way.

Justin nodded and set a few bills on the table under his empty glass as Michael got up to hand the bill and money to the server who was waiting for them at the register. Michael was getting his change back when the one to two am crowd began to file in, slowly filling the quiet diner with a wave of sound. Yeah, now was a great time to call it a night.

"Ready to go?" Justin asked, sidling up to the shorter man.

Michael groaned. "Is it just an early hangover, or is it really fucking loud in here?"

"Yeah, you're ready to go."

Liberty Ave was still bustling when they left to find the car, and it was a slow crawl out of there before they hit dead roads and the quiet, sleepy suburb Michael called home. They pulled up to the house and Michael saw a light on inside. The kitchen. Had Ben been waiting for him? Was he writing?

"I guess Ben's up," Michael said. "You wanna come in for a bit and say hi?"

Justin mulled this over, hand on the key in the ignition. He really should get the car back to Brian, but then again, the older man did have his cell phone and could call and bitch at him to get the car back when he was good and ready.

"Yeah," Justin agreed, turning the key and shutting off the engine.

Michael opened the door gently. Justin thought cautiously would better fit as he watched the man peek around it. They went inside and found Ben in a pair of sweats working over yellow legal pads with a cup of cool coffee on the table, glasses perched precariously on the tip of his nose.

"Hey, honey," Michael said, not wanting to disturb him, but they had a guest.

"Hey, baby, have a nice night?" Ben replied, not looking up.

"Well, if I'm not welcome, I can just go," Justin said with a smile. Ben looked up and grinned.

"Hey, Justin! Long time no see," Ben greeted, getting up and pulling the young man into a hug. "Look at you. First a comic book artist and now you're famous."

"Everyone keeps saying that," Justin brushed off, rolling his eyes. "I'm no Warhol."

"And I'm no Dan Brown," Ben said with a smile.

Justin pulled a face. "I hope not, have you seen the picture on his books?"

Ben ruffled Justin's hair, now grown out longer again, framing his face. "So, sit down. I'll get coffee."

Michael looked cautiously at the mug on the table. "Hon, when did you make that pot?"

"Oh, when I came down," his husband said offhandedly, going into the kitchen.

"When was that?"

"After you left. Why-"

Michael sighed. "Yeah. That's why. It's one in the morning. You want me to make a fresh pot?"

"No, I got it," Ben called from the kitchen. The coffee from hours ago had cooled and gotten thick and took a quick rinse before it was useable again. In the dining room, Michael took a seat next to Justin and covered a yawn behind his hand.

"Been awhile since you've been out?" The blond asked.

"You tell me," Michael shrugged. "Brian must be keeping you up to date."

"Still cranky when you're tired, I see," Justin commented, resting an elbow on the table and a cheek on a loose fist. "How's Hunter?"

"Good. Better grades, new girlfriend."

"Really? How long?"

"Probably going on about a year now."

Justin whistled. "Jeez, kid's in it for the long haul, huh?"

Michael laughed. "I dunno. They're just being careful. After that whole fiasco with the first one… it's better this way."

"Baby, you want hot chocolate?" Ben called from the kitchen. The sound of coffee percolating and hissing filled the room. "I don't want you up all night."

"All of a sudden?" Michael teased. "Yeah, that's fine."

"You two okay, really?" Justin asked, keeping his voice low.

Michael shook his head. "I don't know. That's what makes it hard. Am I not trying hard enough or is there no point in trying?"

It really wasn't Justin's place to advise where he wasn't asked to. And he did only have Brian's side of the events. Michael was obviously torn up because he did love Ben (actually, Michael loved everybody which made it harder) and the problem was the he didn't want to pick one over the other without being fair, but there weren't any rules for this. No milestones to mark when your secret lover was pulling ahead to win you over or when you knew your husband was trying to keep things together. There was no place for Michael to get help from and would it seem dishonest of Justin to push Michael towards his husband? Probably. That was more of a reason that he should keep his mouth shut, really.

"You should go away with Ben."

A/N: Oh man, sorry guys. I'm not really conscious of time (my sense of it is kinda fucked up), but I think this took awhile to write. I'm not sure. Did it? I don't know. I've got some school projects to finish before Spring Break hits and a friend flying in from across the country today so it's been really hectic and I miss sleep (I've got 15 hours of it for this week so far and that's from last Sunday to now). The good news for you guys? I was able to find someone to fill in for me for the week my friend is here, so while I do still have school at the moment (my school still lines up the break with Easter) I'll be getting a little more sleep and more time to work on the next chapter! Yay! I'm a good multi-tasker (obviously lol) so even with my friend here, it should be fine. If not, you'll have a new chapter after this week.

Now, the song credit goes to Queen again, it's called It's Late and it's one of my favorites out of their awesome collections. The song for this chapter was tied with the one I used and I Can't Live Without You and Good Old Fashioned Loverboy and Don't Stop Me Now and Someone To Love Me (my ultimate favorite). Since I don't really plan these chapters out (every turn is kind of a spur of the moment decision), this would've turned out completely different had I used any other song. I think it worked out well clashing with Brian/Michael and Brian/Justin. I really like it, actually. Will I be using more Queen? I hope so! It's so much fun and I'm loving it so far. What song do you guys think might have been better (doesn't have to be Queen), or what songs do you think fit Brian and Michael, personally? I'd love to know.

To the two reviewers who've been emailing and PMing me, thank you so much for trying to get my work out there on other sites! I'm sorry it's not quite working out too well. For everyone else, there's a specific Brian/Michael fandom fiction site that's at (always-fanfic . net) or some such name. There are some amazing writers on it. I haven't quite figured out why my work won't publish there, but it's not a big deal to me. If anyone else knows of specific Brian/Michael fiction sites, please feel free to email me (I prefer it over PMs, honestly) about them. I'm always looking for something good to read or a new place to put up my work! And don't feel weird about it. Lol Like I've mentioned, my schedule prevents sleep and actual emails over spam can really make my day.

On to the story. I'm thinking some of you might be wondering about Brian. I know we're probably all old enough to know this by now, but Imma say it anyways: Don't do drugs. Lol I've got a very long history and a fairly hands on experience with people that can act like Brian has when under the influence. Emotional state before getting high really effects how you are with the drugs. While on the show, he always seems to have it together, well… nothing was really wrong then, was there? Now there's distress and whatnot, so yeah. He's in and out of it a lot more. I guess… more willing to forget himself in the high than use it to keep sharp. If that makes sense. So, don't do drugs… you'll wind up fucking blond brats!

Feel free to leave a review!

~SL

Edit: 11:39pm on 03/28/09 I've had the worst day ever! I might be taking this entire week off to relax and spend time with my friend, so it might be two weeks until you get the next chapter as I assume the week after (my Spring Break) will be my writing time and posting will be after that. Not sure, though. Stick with me! I promise it'll be fun. Lol Thanks!

~SL