AN: I got Sweeney Todd, special 2-disc edition! -Fanfare- What could be better than a musical about a serial killer? Nothing!! That's what! :D I love Mrs. Lovett so much. Helena Bonham Carter did a great job as her. She's such a good actress and made my favorite character all the greater.

Warning: This chapter contains some Bastard!Sora. Sorry, it's just the way it had to be. Oh, and I am not a Kairi-basher. I simply portray her as ditzy because I consider just about all girls to be ditzy. (Yes, I am a girl. And yes, I am ditzy sometimes as well) Truthfully, I have nothing against her. Especially since it's so obvious by the second game that Sora loves Riku more than her. (Hug for Kairi, on knees and tears for Riku...hmmmmm...) Anyway, hope you all enjoy.

Disclaimer: I don't own it


I felt restless today since Tidus had left. He had been somber and quiet all morning, and when I questioned him about it, he told me that today was the anniversary of his death. He said he wanted to go visit his grave. I offered to go with him, but he refused, saying he really needed to go alone.

So I stayed at home, alone for the first time in a long time. I had retreated to my room to stare out the window across the expanse of the clear sea. I found my gaze drawn to the islet that Sora and I used to go to, to be alone. Masters of our destinies…I snorted without any real humor. What had I known back then? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

I was an idiot. There was no such thing as destiny, and even if there was, Sora wasn't mine. That island represented nothing, except maybe a good place to fuck in private.

As I glared at it, I was visited by an urge to go there. Sitting on the sand, with absolutely nothing to interrupt me sounded immensely appealing.

I contemplated taking my nice boat, the one Sora had given me for my birthday, but took the old one instead. Maybe it was immature, but I wanted to spite him by never using that damn thing.

The trip over seemed slower than I remembered. Though…maybe that was for lack of company. I let my feet drag in the sand when I finally reached shore. I left my shoes at home, so the sand sifted pleasantly through my toes.

But this didn't feel like the same islet I had been happy on before. It felt empty, like the thing that had given it substance had disappeared. I could relate.

Something caught my eye near the dock. I thought it was the water swelling and retreating, but the item remained stationary. I crouched down to inspect and laughed out loud. Sora's gray boxers lay on the ground, encrusted in sand and salt. I grabbed them and shook them out. How long ago had that been? It felt like an eternity ago.

I sighed. That might as well have been another lifetime.

I threw the short back into the water. I didn't need any happy memories to remind me of what I didn't have anymore.

I wandered along the beach, watching the sun sparkle off the waves. It was a peaceful sight. I'd forgotten how much I absolutely loved being here. I pulled myself up easily onto the small rise of land, using the overhanging tree. I tried not to remember the last time I'd been here. That had been such a wonderful time; it was when Sora first told me he loved me.

I gripped the dirt under my hands tightly. He was such a liar.

I shouldn't have come here alone. Tidus would have come if I'd asked. But something about this place just seemed sacred. Bringing someone else here would destroy that. And as much as it hurt to remember, I knew I would never be able to make myself destroy the sincerity of this place.

I laid down on the dirt, half-shaded by the tree, and closed my eyes. The rush of the sea and the cry of the gulls filled my ears, becoming my world. Rush and cry; rush and cry. Both of these melded together into the loveliest of lullabies until I found myself drifting off.

I was woken later by voices floating through the air. I sat up quickly, sand sticking to my face. I noticed it was dusk. The setting sun sent a splash of color across the sky in a random pattern of purples and gold. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and yawned. What had woken me up again?

I heard laughter and swiveled my head towards it, craning my neck to see past the tree. My heart could have shriveled up at the sight. Stepping up onto the dock, the biggest smile on his face, was Sora. He was helping Kairi out of a boat. My sadness was short-lived to my anger. How dare he bring her here? She had no right to come to this islet. This was our place!

I growled quietly to myself and clenched my hands on the bark of the tree. They couldn't do this to me; they wouldn't take this place away. Kairi caught sight of me and waved excitedly.

"Riku!" she called; as if I hadn't already seen them. Sora whipped his head around and stared incredulously. I stared at him until he looked away. Kairi pulled him along and jumped up next to me.

"What are you doing here?" she asked. I shrugged.

"Just…watching the sun set," I said quietly.

"Us too!" she gushed. "It's SO romantic, isn't it? Sora told me all about this great island, and without the houses and buildings you can see it so well. And I mean, the location is just…" I tuned her out and let my gaze slide to my former best friend. He was sitting next to the exuberant redhead, staring down at the ground. His gaze met mine and he glared before laying a hand on Kairi's shoulder.

"We should go somewhere more private. We wouldn't want to interrupt Riku's jerking off to thoughts of his precious Tidus." I shot him a death-glare, to which he responded with a sneer. Kairi, who didn't sense the bad blood between us, said,

"Where is Tidus? You should bring him here. Oh, I wish you had today. I want to meet him."

"Yeah, Riku," Sora said condescendingly. "Heaven knows what you could do on an empty island. Hey, maybe you could just lay out on the dirt and let him completely suck you off?" Both Kairi and I stared openmouthed at him. "What?" he growled.

"Are…you two fighting?" Kairi asked weakly, looking between us. She looked uncomfortable to be in the middle suddenly.

"Of course not," Sora said coolly. "What gave you that idea?" I couldn't take this anymore. I wouldn't stand idly by while he hopelessly destroyed everything sacred. I gripped his elbow and dragged him along with me. He struggled, but I've always been stronger than him.

"We'll be right back," I called back to Kairi. She nodded dazedly, watching as Sora practically threw a temper tantrum while I pulled him along. When we were in a relatively private area behind a thick grove of palm trees, I pinned him against one roughly.

"What is your problem?" I growled at him. He tugged uselessly at my arm.

"My problem? What about you? What's your problem; dragging me out here. And being everywhere I am. I didn't want you to be around; I just wanted to spend a nice time with my girlfriend. Is that too much to ask?!" I watched him struggle until he wore himself out and slumped against the trunk.

"Why did you have to start dating him?" he asked pitifully. "Why? Why couldn't you just stay single?"

"What?" I frowned. "Is that what this is about? Are you jealous of Tidus or something?"

"No!" The fire was back in his eyes. "I am not jealous of him. But if you can just move on to some new guy like that, then it's obvious you never…loved…me, like you said you did." I gaped at him.

"Didn't love you? You have no idea how much I loved you; how much I still do!" Sora stared at me evenly, a challenge surfacing in his eyes.

"Prove it," he said in a low voice. I stared at him incredulously. Did he mean what I think he meant? He kept up his gaze, never wavering. Those blue orbs pulled me in, just like so many times before. I cupped his face in my hands and kissed him, pouring as much feeling as I could muster into it. I expected him to push me away, but he only whimpered and wrapped his arms around my neck. I pulled away to look into his eyes.

"Do you still doubt me?" I asked huskily. He didn't answer, only pulled me back down and pressed our lips together once more. I had missed this so much…too much. I needed him like a drug. The feel of his skin; the smell of his hair…that and so much more that made him who he was were slowly destroying me. I knew I should stop this. But it was hard to think when he pressed himself so completely against me like that.

I felt a bulge in his pants and smirked a little. I couldn't deny that it made me feel good to know I could still affect him like that. I slipped my hand under his thin cotton t-shirt and let it slide down beneath the elastic waistband of his short to stroke his length. He groaned and pulled away to brace himself on my shoulders, head buried in my collarbone.

"Riku," he gasped. "Riku, Riku, Riku…" He repeated my name over and over as I stroked his hair with my free hand. All the problems we'd been having, everything that caused this hate between us, were forgotten, if only for a little while. If only for now.

I felt him come into my hand, and he slumped boneless against me. I wrapped my free arm around him to keep him from falling. When he had regained enough sense, he pushed me away gently.

"We should…clean off," he said dazedly. "Kairi will be wondering what…happened to us." His face was red with a blush. I couldn't fight off a smile. Without thinking, I leaned in to kiss him, but he dodged me.

"I…I can't, Riku," he said guiltily. "I just can't…" I stared at him, sure he was joking. He wasn't.

"Can't what, Sora?" I said angrily. "Can't kiss me? Because you have a girlfriend? But of course it's okay to let me jerk you off, huh? What, not getting any with Kairi?" He winced at my words.

"You don't understand," he said quietly.

"Then enlighten me!" I was working myself into a frenzy now. "Please, tell me why one minute you're accusing me of not loving you and the next pushing me away. Because for the life of me I can't come up with a credible answer!"

"Because when I'm with Kairi, I'm normal!" He cried, staring at me pleadingly. "If I'm with Kairi, then nobody's ever going to look down on me. But if I'm with you, I'm a…I'm a freak and a fag. I can't go through that, I just can't." My eyes narrowed.

"Well, I'm so sorry things are SO hard for you, Sora. I can't possibly imagine what that's like." I turned and started walking away when he grabbed my arm. I pushed him off and he landed in a small pool of clear water. He surfaced, sputtering.

"If you're going to reject me over and over again, then fine, Sora. But don't drag me into your sick little game of how far can I go before this is wrong, because I'm not going to participate it in any longer." I turned away and stormed down the beach. Kairi noticed me.

"Riku, what happened?" She called. I said nothing, just climbed into my boat and angrily rowed for shore. Night had fallen by the time I finally reached the house. I angrily threw the oars into the boat and went inside, seething.

I wasn't surprised to find Tidus sitting on the couch when I went inside. He stared at me silently. I stalked over to him and pressed and insistent kiss to his lips. He responded readily.

Sora didn't know what he was talking about. He talked about being normal, but he had no idea what that was. Normal wasn't being straight; it was allowing yourself to love someone regardless of gender. It was never denying what made you feel good inside. It was this, right now; giving in to carnal feelings of lust easily and not repressing it.

He would never understand…and I was done waiting for him to.