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A/N- Capricorn75 has bullied me into posting the rest of it. Thanks.


I had to break things off with Edward. I felt horribly guilty. Mike didn't want me with him. It wasn't time for me to start dating, yet. I spent so much time at Mike's grave that I knew that Rose had taken Jeannie home to her house.

Rose and Emmett have a fantastic house. They're Real Estate agents, they know how to find a good one at a good price. I pulled into their driveway, and all the lights were on. I could see Emmett had Jeannie in his lap and was feeding her applesauce at the dining room table while Rose was talking. They were enjoying themselves. I watched from outside; Jeannie with a mommy, a daddy in a big, pretty house. Right now, she was in a tiny house with her grandpa and me, cramped into the same bedroom as her mom. I was struggling financially, and Rose and Emmett had cash in the bank. Money probably wouldn't be so tight if I was still teaching and Mike was running the shop with his parents.

I walked up to the front door, knocking as I entered. "Hey guys, I'm here for the munchkin!" I called, wiping my feet on the front mat. "Hand her over, and nobody gets hurt!" Jeannie squealed.

"Hey Bella, we're just eating dinner!" Emmett called. "Why don't you join us?"

I ran my fingers through my hair, shaking the water droplets out, and took my jacket off, trying to keep from getting water on the hardwood floors. I made sure I didn't have any mud on my boots and I went into the dining room. Jeannie squealed and held out her arms to me.

"What are you having?" I asked, picking Jeannie up.

"Pork chops and roast potatoes and green beans," Rose said.

"And applesauce," Emmett said, sliding the applesauce across the table to me with a long teaspoon in it.

"I'll make a plate for you," Rose said, getting up.

"She's so much fun," Emmett said. "Although I hated putting her in cloth diapers. You've got a surprise in a ziplock baggie in her diaper bag." Jeannie was singing and gurling.

"They're better for her skin and good for the environment," I said. "Do you know how much oil has to be used to make even one those? And they never degrade in the landfills."

"She's gone all green on us," Emmett said.

"Here, Bella," Rose said, returning with a plate. She set it down in front of me. I cut up my potatoes with my fork and let Jeannie have some. "You're going to have to learn to change diapers eventually, Em," Rose said.

"Wait a second!" I cried. "Are you guys pregnant?"

"Not yet," Rosalie slyly. "But, we'd like to get pregnant."

"We're going to try."

"When did you decide on this?" I cried.

"Tonight," Emmett said, smiling. "Jeannie Beannie kind of convinced us."

"Everything's in place for it. Has been for a while."

"Ang will be so insulted that her kids didn't do the convincing," I said.

"Well, she never lets me baby-sit," Emmett pouted.

"You're just as much of a big kid as Jacob," I said.

"I know," Rose said. "You can't help who you fall in love with."

"Was that meant to be an insult?" Emmett asked.

"No," Rose replied.

"I can't wait," I said. "You two will be great parents!"

"I hope so," Emmett said, picking up the plates that he and Rosalie had eaten off of to take to the dishwasher in the kitchen.

"So, what conclusion have you come to?" Rosalie asked.

I bowed my head. "He doesn't want me to date, yet. At least not Edward Cullen," I said.

"What happened?" she cried.

"When I asked, I heard a crack of thunder," I said. "It doesn't thunder in the winter, here. It was a sign. Mike was trying to tell me something."

"It can thunder here in the winter," Rose said.

"It's too cold for that," I said. "It was supernatural."

"Bella, don't see a twig pointed in one direction over another as a sign," Rose said. "I said to look for a sign, not be superstitious."

"You told me to look for it," I said. "And I heard it. I'm sorry Rose, I just can't ignore something like that."

"Bella, you know that Lauren Mallory is moving back from Port Angeles, right?" Rose asked.

"Yeah, so?" I asked, not understanding what that had to do with the conversation.

"Lauren is going to be all over Edward Cullen," she said. "Good men don't stay single long in Forks. I saw her at your mom's barbeque last summer, and she was flirting and falling all over him after you and Jeannie left. She went to cosmetology school and looks like a million dollars."

"Well," I said, thinking, "if he can't wait for me, what good is he?"

"Mike was crazy about you from day one. Edward is like everybody else," she said. "Out of sight, out of mind."

"I think a girl deserves a man who's crazy about her," I said. "Like Mike was for me. He was the love of… my life…" A scary thought struck me. What if he was the highlight of my love life and that was over at age 25? I shivered. I'd never be in love like that again and I'd have to settle when the time came.


As I got my little Jeannie Beannie into the car and drove home to Charlie's, I tried to convince myself that soul mates and the love of your life was nonsense, but somewhere in the back of my brain, I couldn't let it go. Life is what you make it, Bella, the angel on my shoulder said. No it's not, we're all on a charted course and it's already pre-decided for you, the devil on my other shoulder said.

But, I couldn't let go of Mike so quickly.

I went to church with Charlie the next day (he liked going to church after the accident, and people liked seeing Jeannie, and she liked being seen). Sunday was my one day off. I used my time in the pew to think about what the thunder clap meant. All in all, I was just confused. How could Mike not like Edward? I was so distracted, I didn't see the Cullens a few rows over. They were all sitting together with Edward included. They had been trying to get my attention all through the service, but I was so distracted with Jeannie, I hadn't seen them until church was over. Alice raced over to see Jeannie.

"Hi, Figgy!" she cried, taking Jeannie from me without asking.

"Hi, Bella," Edward said, warmly. "I've been meaning to talk to you."

"Alice, why don't you take Jeannie around?" I asked.

"Sure thing," Alice said.

Alice took off with Jeannie to greet some of our friends. I saw Jacob and Angela in the distance with their kids. People were fawning over their baby daughter, Wendi.

"I had a great time with you on Friday," Edward said. His eyes looked especially green today. They were sparkling emerald against the thin grey sweater he was wearing. "Maybe we can do it again, sometime. Maybe you can bring Jeannie along."

"Oh, about that," I said. His smile faded. "Edward, I had a great time, too, I just feel like it might be too soon to date for me. I'd be comparing you my husband- my late husband. That's not fair. To you, I mean."

A fake, polite smile plastered it way onto his face. "Oh, I understand," he said. "I do. You've been through- you're going through a tough time. Maybe it's not over yet. I'm sorry. Maybe when you're ready." Everything suddenly became so awkward between us. I had really messed things up- forever.


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