CHAPTER 30
The police cruiser had barely stopped before Hutch pushed open the door and flew up the steps to the hospital two at a time. The waiting room was full of people dealing with their own emergencies, but Hutch wasn't aware of any of it.
He and Starsky had enough experience with the hospital that they knew their way around. Hutch swept passed the intake desk and flashed his badge at the harried nurse. His long, purposeful strides transported him back to the treatment rooms, looking left and right for his partner.
He hesitated at the opening of one cubicle when he caught sight of curly black hair. There were so many people crowded around the bed but he instinctively knew it was his friend. He stood at the entrance to the room for a moment as the doctor and nurses continued to catalogue what they found. Phrases like, -type and cross match, x-ray and vital signs- swirled around the room, keeping everyone busy with their assigned task. Hutch crept further into the room but immediately he found himself flat against the wall, stuck there as if held by fly paper. The scene was far worse than he expected and his friend hardly recognizable. He wanted to look away but he couldn't. So far the medical personnel had not noticed him so he stayed where he was.
Starsky's eyes were swollen shut. In fact, his face was extremely distorted, bruised and many cuts crossed his features.
His chest was bare revealing a deep gash to his upper chest area. Blood still trickled from the opening revealing it to be jagged and raw. Streaks of blood had dribbled down his chest and matted in the hair across it and streamed down his belly. His hands lay at his side, but Hutch could tell that they too were sliced and bleeding, evidence that his friend had fought back hard.
The middle part of his body was covered by a sheet, exposing both legs, revealing two different kinds of problems. The blond stared for a long time at the detective's right leg which was at an unusual angle and exposed bone sticking out.
Also Hutch gulped when he noticed the gash on Starsky's hip. It was raw, deep and still bleeding.
His stomach churned at what he saw but his heart broke with the guilt that surrounded him.
"Please sir, you can't be in here." The nurse was petite with flashing green eyes, her white uniform crisp, and her cap sitting squarely on her brunette hair. In another setting, the men would have vied for her attention. But now, Hutch regarded her as a barrier, keeping him from the wounded man.
Without taking his eyes off of his friend, Hutch spoke quietly. "He's my partner. We're cops." So far Starsky had not moved or made any sound. Hutch swallowed. The blond wanted, needed to go nearer and let him know that he wasn't alone. He looked around, vaguely aware of the monitors that beeped and the green and white lines rising up and down across the screen. He knew it meant his friend was still alive, but not until he could touch Starsky and feel for himself the pulse in his wrist, would he believe it.
"He won't know you're here." The nurse gently but firmly steered the man toward the door but Hutch stood his ground.
"I'm not leaving till I talk to him. He'll know it's me." He continued to move closer, choosing a spot near the end of the bed. He leaned down to grasp Starsky's hand. He flinched at the cold clamminess in his large, sweaty hand. He grasped it and squeezed lightly. The doctor worked around him, never speaking to him.
"Starsk, hang on. I'm right here." He leaned closer, speaking softly. "I'm not going anywhere." He felt responsible for each ounce of lost blood and all debilitating wounds to his friend. Had he been by his side, he could have prevented all of this.
A slight groan escaped the battered lips. Hutch looked toward the doctor, making sure he had heard the cry. He reached out, stroking a small, unmarked area of the battered body. The blond moved only inches when the doctor vied for access to his patient.
The emergency room doctor leaned down to listen to the injured man's heart. Satisfied, he straightened his back and flipped the stethoscope across his neck.
Another whimper from Starsky had Hutch's heart constricting in his chest. He couldn't stand knowing that his friend was in pain and he was unable to help him.
Hutch was unaware that time had passed. The doctor had left to wait for test results while the nurse remained near her patient.
Hutch continued hovering. The cubicle was filled with the steady noise of the monitors. In a way it was comforting. At least there was no artificial breathing apparatus strapped to his partner.
It was always disorienting to be faced with his partner being so dependent on other people. Neither of them liked being out of control of their surroundings. Hutch sat down, grasping the reddened, raw hand of his friend. At least it was warmer now. The guilt washed over him as he took in the damaged body.
"I'm sorry Starsk." He spoke quietly, not caring if the nurse heard him. He knew that in some way, Starsky would know he was there, even though he had not gained consciousness. "I'll get you through this. I let you down once, but it won't happen again."
Hutch raised his eyes to the monitors to convince himself that Starsky's heart still beat and he felt for the pulse in his wrist. It was weak but it was definitely there. April caught Hutch's attention as she took the time to introduce herself and to reassure the visitor.
"I'm April, his nurse until after surgery." She smiled briefly, then continued observing and recording her findings. "He's surprisingly strong given all that he's gone through."
Hutch seemed content to just sit by his friend. She was touched by the unabashed love he had for the wounded man. She could tell that it was a strong male bond between these two, something that the blond was not ashamed of.
"Aw buddy, I know you're in pain. I should've been with you." He lowered his head, still holding the lax hand in his. "I wasn't there to back you up." Suddenly, his head snapped up, searching Starsky's eyes for a sign. He could have sworn he felt his friend squeeze his hand.
The eyes were still swollen, impossible to tell if there was any effort to even open them. But he continued to hold the hand as he encouraged his partner.
"Babe, can you hear me? Can you do it again?" Just then a slight grip compressed Hutch's hand.
"April, I think he just squeezed my hand."
She checked his pupils, surveyed the monitors again and nodded her head in approval.
"Very good sign. Keep talking to him."
"You're in the hospital. You need surgery buddy. You're in pretty bad shape, but you'll be okay, I promise."
Hutch continued to hold Starsky's hand but there was not another answering pressure.
