Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto
Dedication: To handsome strangers on the bus...
Always think of who is like who with my friends...especially with animals and vegetables. I'm a panda and we have yet to decide on my vegetable :P
Also influenced by Dictionary Ink's one shot in a hundred drops of mercury
Day 2/14 days of being handcuffed
Recap
The two sprinted out the door, Sakura quickly caught on to Ino's grin. She heard Asuma yelling and she was about to turn her head but Ino yanked her forward.
"Don't look back Sakura! Keep on going!"
"Where exactly are we going?"
Ino shrugged.
"You don't know?"
"Look, just relax. Let go, go with the flow," Ino stopped running.
"Go with the flow?"
"Mmhm, loosen up!"
Sakura contemplated this; loosen up?
"You alright there pinky?" Ino chuckled, "Good, then we're off."
End Recap
"Hey Sai, Suigetsu, how are we on this shitty morning?" Ino waved her free hand in a salute to her best friends.
"Ah Ino, you are as cheerful as ever," Sai looked up from his charcoal drawing of Suigetsu smoking pot.
"Woah, who've you brought Ino? Is that..."
"Yep Suigetsu, its her. We've sort of been handcuffed together since yesterday. We have to stay this way until our project is due..." Ino sighed.
"Project?" Suigetsu's brain seemed to have short circuited.
"Yes, a social science project. We got to learn about each other's culture. Since we got into a bit of trouble Tsunade cuffed us for the next 2 weeks" Sakura explained in a matter of fact voice.
Suigetsu and Sai looked at them for a while in silence.
"So?" Suigetsu frowned, "Ino is doing a project?"
Sakura rolled her eyes, "Haven't we established that?"
"Look Sakura I sprung you out of maths, the least you can do is to shut the hell up," Ino growled.
"Does your mum know?" Sai questioned as he turned back to his charcoal and paper.
"I highly doubt that, and I haven't seen anybody from my family since yesterday morning," Ino sat down next to Sai, Sakura followed her lead, "So...what are we drawing here?"
"Suigetsu."
"Uh-huh but I don't get it..." Ino analysed Sai's charcoal drawing...was that flames coming out of Sui's...chest?
"I'm showing his inner demons," Sai replied as he smudged a line across Suigetsu's brow.
Suigetsu laughed and blew out a smoke ring. Sakura fidgeted slightly, they were hanging around at the back of the school and she didn't feel comfortable at all.
"What's wrong with you?" Ino began to scrape the dirt out from under her nails.
"I've never skipped class before...what's going to happen. What if my mother finds out!"
"Sucks to your ass-mar."
"Don't quote Lord of the Flies if you can't do it properly," Suigetsu said before lighting up another joint.
"Oh and you think you can do better?" Ino challenged.
"I know I can do better."
"Oh really? Well give me a quote that fits this occasion," Ino smiled.
"Uh..." Suigetsu looked thoughtfully at the sky as he smoked his constant companion, then he smiled at Ino and put out his joint, he then held out his hand, "Have you got any matches?"
"What?"
"Huh! I win, I quoted a quote that fit so well that you didn't even realise I quoted it," Suigetsu smiled to himself in a stupidly idiotic and cretinous way Ino thought.
"Hmph, whatever..."
Then Sai stopped drawing and looked up, "If we were in Lord of the Flies I think Ino would be Piggy..."
"What?" Ino shook her head, "No fucking way. I'm sooo not Piggy. Piggy is a social outcast! And the kids make fun of him and call him a pig...oh..."
"Yeah, oh!" Sai laughed quietly and went back to drawing.
Sakura frowned, they sure talked about strange things. She only sat with some kid called Hinata but that was so she didn't look like a complete loner. They never talked. Was this what talking to friends was like?
"Well if I'm Piggy then Suigetsu would so be Simon," Ino nodded to herself.
"How so?"
"Simon is weird, he hides away from others and he was the smartest of all the kids," Ino replied.
"Pfft, so Suigetsu is the smartest of all of us? We really must be in trouble," Sai said.
Suigetsu let out a short laugh and Ino joined in, Sakura couldn't help but smile as she watched them talk about nothing. It seemed sort of nice...
"And what about me?" Sai put down his charcoal, he was getting interested.
"Hmm...you are...the parachute guy and the pig head on a stick," Suigetsu said.
Ino burst into laughter, she was holding her sides and pointing at Sai's shocked looking face.
"What! I'm not even alive then! That blows. I'm so not a decapitated head!"
"Well think about it, the parachute guy is harmless, silent but he makes everyone fearful and paranoid and evil...." Suigetsu had gotten into one of his insightful moods, "And the pig's head is the same but the pig's head is also some sort of god who knows all...at least in Simon's mind."
"Which is really fucked up," Ino managed to say in between bouts of laughter.
"Great, so lets get this straight. I'm the social outcast who gets killed, Suigetsu is the weirdo who gets killed and Sai is the one who drives them all around the bend that causes them to be killed," Ino shook her head at the conclusion they had come to.
The small group then lapsed into silence until Suigetsu broke it.
"I need to get laid," Suigetsu sighed and lay down on the floor with his arms behind his head.
Sakura and Ino choked on air, Sai just continued to draw.
"And why is that?" Ino asked.
"It's been a while..." Suigetsu confessed.
"How long has-
"Uh! Hello! How old are you? We're in year 10! Ino and I just reached the legal age. How can you have had sex before now?"
The whole group looked at Sakura with wary eyes.
"Boy, is she sheltered."
"The most sheltered of the lot."
"Extremely naive."
"You didn't answer my question!"
"Okay, okay. I'm 16, turned sixteen in February..." Suigetsu shrugged, "And...yeah it is possible to get laid before the age of 16, believe it or not."
Sakura sat in a state of shock, "I-I of course I know that but...but, how young where you?"
Ino and Sai shifted in their spots, they knew every detail of Suigetsu's first time and they were not willing to hear it again. It was mentally scarring.
"I was thirteen, she was seventeen..." Suigetsu seemed lost in the memory, "She sure was experienced. Even thinking about it now gives me a hard on."
"Uh, please keep it in your pants," Ino groaned, Suigetsu was like a brother to her and having to listen to him talk about being horny wasn't on the top of her to-do list. Not that she ever had a to-do list but whatever.
"So how long has it been?" Sai seemed curious.
Suigetsu snapped out of his reverie, he didn't seem so eager to give away that piece of information, "Um...well..."
"Oh come on and tell us, really," Ino rolled her eyes.
"6 months, one week and two days," Suigetsu said quickly, avoiding eye contact.
"I'm surprised you haven't lost your libido completley," Sakura lectured, "You smoking so much of that...that awful thing the whole time."
Suigetsu laughed, "Hasn't slowed me down so far...well at least not until now."
Sakura scowled at Suigetsu's light-hearted response, he was probably going to develop some sort of psychosis. Then who would be laughing? Sakura then began to wonder about Sai and Ino, did they lose their....
"Um...Ino, Sai? Have you lost your...you know?" Sakura trailed off awkwardly.
"Me?" Sai wiped charcoal onto his school top, soiling the white with a shocking dark black, "Lets see...my first time was when I was 14. I don't remember who with though...I had way too much to drink. Sort of a shame really."
Sakura swallowed loudly as if she was literally trying to digest the information, "And Ino?"
Ino's face seemed cold and distant, "I'm still a virgin and I plan to remain so for as long as humanly possible."
"Oh?"
"Don't look so surprised, I don't look like a whore do I? Besides, I know what sex can do to people...especially girls. Every since...then...I've vowed to remain untouched until marriage or death."
"Untouched?" Sai laughed.
"Shuddap!" Ino threw a stray rock at her best friend, "Untouched as in no touching of the essential areas. Kissing doesn't count!"
Suigetsu shook his head in what seemed to be pain, "I don't know how she does it..."
"I have willpower, and you don't know what your missing out on unless you've tried it so..." Ino folded her arms and sighed in satisfaction.
There was a short silence...and then...
"I'm still a virgin," Sakura put forward this confidential piece of information.
The trio tried their best to stop from laughing but they were only mere mortals and much to Sakura's distress they were in hysterics for quite a while. The only thing that stopped them from their fit of laughter was the bell to mark the end of lunch. Had they really been there for that long?
"Wow, almost the end of school and I haven't been to one class," Sakura felt sort of strange, she was scared yet thrilled at the thought of breaking the rules so blatantly.
She also had spent the entire day wagging class with the likes of Ino Yamanaka and friends. The sort of people she had separated from herself for the past four and a bit years. Her 'scum filter' had been broken down, she was sitting and talking, laughing and actually enjoying herself with them.
Plus she had actually told them all she was a virgin, and listened to their 'first time' stories. Sakura wondered if friends made you feel as carefree as she was feeling and she sort of hated herself for getting along with Ino. Weren't they sworn enemies since...since...
"So what are you going to do about your problem Suigetsu?" Ino interrupted Sakura's thoughts.
"Huh?"
"About the dry spell?"
"Oh yeah, well the plan is to get laid," Suigetsu replied in an isn't-it-absofuckinglutley-obvious voice.
This pissed Ino off.
"Yeah! I KNOW that dickhead what I want to know is how you are going to get yourself laid?"
"Oh."
"Yeah, OH!" Ino rolled her eyes.
"I guess I need to find a girl who...has no self respect, is a bit of a slut and has-
"Really low standards?" Sai said absent mindedly.
The insult completely flew over Suigetsu's head, "Exactly!"
"So basically you want free and easy sex?" Ino asked.
"Preferably easy and definitely free," Suigetsu nodded.
Sakura twirled her hair around her fingers, this conversation was only slightly uncomfortable. She had no idea what they were talking about and free? Sakura shuddered at the thought of Suigetsu paying to...Sakura shuddered again.
"You could just pay," Ino suggested, "I can get you a discount?"
"Maybe...but what if the cops bust me? I seriously can't get anything else on my record...or else I'm definitely going to juvy," Suigetsu sighed.
"Hehe, then you'll get assraped," Sai chuckled to himself.
"Tell me about it!" Suigetsu frowned at his problem, "That sort of stuff can really screw up a guy."
"Juvy?" Sakura's eyes were wide, "You have a criminal record? What did you do?"
"Possession," the three said at once.
Sakura eyed them all.
"Well isn't it obvious?" Ino asked, "I mean look at him!"
At that moment Suigetsu was just about to light a new joint, "What? S'not like I'm addicted or anything. I can quit whenever I want!"
This time they all rolled their eyes, yeah sure you could Suigetsu.
"Do you all have criminal records?"
"...yeah," Sai spoke first, "I've mugged a senior, then I raped her and held up a bank...all in the same night."
Sakura glared at Sai, "Rape isn't funny."
"Sorry mother."
"Anyway do you all have records?"
"Well I do actually have one for being drunk under age and starting a brawl but Danzo owns a pub so of course I'll be in that scene," Sai defended himself, "I mean, its not like I planned to hit someone with a barstool."
"You what?!"
"I got one for possession but that so wasn't my fault. I was actually holding it for a friend...stupid Suigetsu and damn smart-ass cop. He really thought he was so high and mighty spouting the 'I've heard that one before' bull shit."
Suigetsu smirked, "And I didn't even get the pot after you went through all that trouble."
"What did your parents say?" Sakura's green eyes were wide.
The group fell silent. Sakura immediately felt like she had crossed some line that had been created mutually by the other three. She regretted ever saying what she had said only a few moments ago. If only she could turn back time...
"Uh...anyway what girl is Suigetsu going to find?" Sakura desperately tried to change the subject and to her relief it worked.
"I'm glad you brought that up!" Suigetsu sat up with an out of place animation to his face, "Because I've seen this...
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