A/N: Well... This kind of sucks.
24 follows and 10 favorites, and only 8 reviews? Really? :/
"Wow. Just... Bloody wow. I thought you all were offended from yesterday when I explained what an uke was, and now all of you are back here, ready to join the UCTFBRIR," England said, smirking. His eyebrows were furrowed downward, teasing the other uke nations. "What bloody hypocrites. I suppose you all noticed how bad seme treatment is getting these days..."
"Shut up, ahen," China muttered, and crossed his arms over the stuffed Shinatty-doll staring creepily at Iceland, who shivered and looked away. The other nations murmured their agreement, except for Italy.
"Veeee~ Actually, I just asked Germany if I could join, and he said I could!"
Japan gaped a little in surprise. "But... Aren't England and Germany on different sides and views of a lot of things? Why on earth would Germany let you join England's alliance after all the fighting that went on between them?"
"Veeee~ He said it was okay if it was safe, and plus, uke means PASTA! So of course it would be safe if it includes pasta~"
"... I'm not even going to point out all of the things wrong with that," Austria said, frowning. It was obvious he was still upset over the incident in which Hungary had misunderstood the alliance from his more irritable behavior. Prussia decided to take advantage of this as he smirked and popped up behind the brunette nation's shoulder.
"Kesesese! Austria's grumpy today because Hungary said she didn't care whether or not he joined this alliance!" The albino nation exclaimed, smirking. His red eyes glowed in jeer.
England crossed his arms and sighed. "Now you see what I mean when talking about getting better rights in relationships. If you think about it, we're taken for granted by those bloody semes all the time... Doesn't it annoy you? This alliance is to get it through their thick skulls that it's harder than it seems to be the uke!"
"... Seriously, ahen. Are you high?"
"I am not high, China!" England snapped, glaring fiercely at the Asian nation who was frowning while cuddling with Shinatty. "Bloody God, please, stop asking me if I'm high! I stopped with the major Opium exports long ago!"
"... Only the major Opium exports?" Finland asked, with wide eyes.
England coughed into his sleeve, clearing his throat. "Not the point. The point is, today, we're going to officially declare independence from the seme nations, and end our relationships with them-"
"NANI?" Japan demanded, his usually spaced-out brown eyes suddenly focusing on England, "End our relationships with them? I can't end my relationship with Greece! I didn't join to do that, England!"
The other nations reeled back at Japan's sudden outburst.
"... Calm down, Japan. I meant by end our relationships with them, simply decrease our independence with them. For instance, stop relying on Greece for trading routes and money, and such, not necessarily stop your personal relationship with him..." England mumbled off. "We need to decrease our dependency on the seme nations as the first step."
"You're serious about this, aren't you... It isn't something that Flying Mint Bunny told you, either?" Norway suddenly spoke up, however emotionlessly, to England. While all the other nations remained confused, England simply nodded.
"I doubt Flying Mint bunny would even talk to me about my dependency on France as an uke," England said, and Norway didn't say anything back. He only sighed.
"Alright. I support this, then. I'll stop a few of my major trading business with Denmark and try to run them in different nations," Norway said, as if doing that was extremely easy. The other nations gaped in surprise, and England smiled, looking pleased.
"Whose next? By doing this, you are pledging you allegiance to the UCTFBRIR fully, as the first step to show those semes who are the best in our relationships, and cannot drop out halfway, unless you care to ignite the fury of the mythical world upon your being," England explained, smirking.
"... Oh god, he is high, ahen..."
England chose to ignore the statement from China.
"I... I suppose I'll join next, then," Austria said quietly, looking slightly more pale than usual. England nodded and wrote his name down on a piece of paper alongside Norway's name.
"The awesome Prussia shall not be excluded! Even though I will never be a pansy-ass uke, I shall join this cause! Kesese! You're welcome, for my help in this alliance shall be, as expected, most excellent!"
"I... I suppose I'll join if Norway is in it, then, I can possibly establish some trading routes with him, and break away from Sweden more so... Now that I think about it, I really am dependent on him," Finland said, looking down in embarrassment. England nodded, smiling, and wrote his name down.
"Aiyah, you younger nations... I can't believe you're giving up such good trading relations so easily, aru..."
Japan raised his hand. "... Although... Greece-san's help is very good for my country, I believe it would be better to sustain myself as well. I give my country and it's people to this cause."
China's jaw dropped. "Y-You too, Japan? But Greece is one of your biggest trading partners, aru! How could you give up such useful help all for this little charade Opium is playing?" The oldest nation turned to England, glaring. "You're corrupting these nations! This is just a plot for you to get a bunch of strong nations on your side so you can easily declare war against other nations aru!"
England looked up, his sharp green eyes narrowing. "No it's not, China! I'm actually trying to gain my independence from the clutches of that bloody frog! France is always treating me like such an uke, I'm sick of it. And I know you're sick of Russia treating you that way, too!"
"I thought I was, aru!" China countered, "But I'm not! I like being how I am just fine, aru! So I won't be the one to fall for your little scheme, Opium! If these younger nations are naive enough to fall into this obvious trap, then so be it. But you can't trick the former dragon of the west!"
"Former dragon of the west?" Iceland asked, raising an eye. "I thought you were known as the girly-nation who tried his best to stay out of battles and ended up having to go through a century of humiliation?"
"That was because of you loud westerners and Europeans!" China exclaimed, flushing in anger. He glared and got up from his seat, staring down at all of the other nations. "I'm leaving, aru. You all are so foolish for falling for another Westerner trap. Just like how they stole land from my people, Opium is going to steal the lives of your people for his own cause, aru!"
"... Man, you have problems, you Panda Bastard."
"That's it, aru!" China spouted, and stomped off out of the meeting room, slamming the door behind him.
The rest of the nations, other than England, began to think about what China said as they listened to the receding stomping noises as China left. Maybe it was true, maybe this was all a plan by England to get them to sign a secret war treaty so when England declared war on France, they would be roped into joining him...
"Don't believe what he's spouting," England interrupted their thoughts. "I'm being honest about this! This is a bloody problem with these goddamn semes, and we need to step up and do something."
The other nations who had not yet agreed sighed before standing up.
"Okay, here we have the very first meeting of the SCTFFDIR here! Please, I'm going to take role now, mon peuple, so please sit down and raise your hand if you're here~ America, Sweden, Greece, Denmark, Russia, Hong Kong, Germany, Spain, Poland, Hungary... And the beautiful me is here! What a pleasant surprise. We're all here for the first ever SCTFFDIR meeting~!"
The nations who had been called for role were sitting at a round table, as they looked at each other in curiosity. They had no idea why France had called them to the World Meeting room, and were slightly creeped out by the happiness in the French Nation's tone.
"Hurry up and get to the point about why we're here, France," Hungary snapped, her green eyes glaring. "I'm not in the mood right now to wait around to listen to the trash that spews out of your dumb mouth."
France drew back, smiling, and grinned, reaching over to tuck a few locks of chocolate brown hair behind the female nation's ear. "Ooh~! Hungary's in such a playful, feisty mood today! I like it!"
The European female Nation grabbed France's hand and twisted it, making the blonde wince in pain.
"Didn't I just say to get on with why we're here?"
"P-Pardon, M-Magyar-sama! I... I will tell you as soon as possible, just please don't kill me!" France pleaded, and the Hungarian woman sighed sharply and released her hold on the blonde's wrist. France sighed in relief, but frowned at the red mark on his skin, and proceeded to turn to the nations.
"... Anyway, th-this group of nations I have assembled very purposely is called the SCTFFDIR, and our goal is to oppose the UCTFBRIR, which is made up of England, Romano, Italy, China, Japan, Finland, Iceland, Norway, Austria, Prussia, Lithuania, and... Ah, right, my dear boy Mathieu~!"
America stood up, his eyes narrowing dangerously. "Your Matthew? Mattie's mine, you French bastard, lay off!"
France only smirked devilishly. "Yes, yes, I made a good choice bringing you into this meeting, America... You perfectly match what this whole group is all about."
The American blinked, before his mouth began to twitch into a smile. "... I do? I mean, of course I do! I'm the hero, and I'll definitely be the hero of this SCT... ST... STD club!"
France smirked. "Of course you will be the hero. For our club, the SCTFFDIR, stands for: Semes coming together for full domination in relationships. For those of you who don't know what a seme is... It's basically (beep)-(beep)... And the UCTFBRIR stands for Ukes coming together for better rights in relationships. A uke is a (beep)-(beep)..."
The other nations stared, disturbed at the explanation of what a seme and uke were.
"... S-So that's why Norge didn't want us to find out... Er..." Was all Denmark could muster up, his face scrunched up together in confusion and embarrassment.
"I see," Was all Hong Kong said, impassive as usual.
"Like, that's weird, me and Liet, like, aren't even in a relationship, Francey," Poland spoke up, flipping his golden hair back like a real diva. "Plus, I like, am the one wearing skirts half the time. Shouldn't he, be like, the person to be on top?" Poland continued, not at all ashamed of what he was saying.
"The fandom wants what the fandom wants."
"W'll m' w'f w'dn't d'rm 'f 'vr 'l'vn m'." (Well my wife wouldn't dream of ever leaving me.)
"Really?" France asked, raising an eye. He smirked, "Because it would seem to me that Finland already signed a treaty with England, leader of the UCTFBRIR, saying he'd give up trading with you to become less dependent on you. Seems like he dreams of it more than you can imagine."
Sweden's eyes widened in hurt.
"In fact... All of them agreed to join the UCTFBRIR except for China," France said smugly. The seme nations seemed slightly surprised at the information, while Russia only smiled innocently. The others walked over, and began to stare at the treaty with sudden interest.
"Of course my dear Jao-Jao would never join anything that would oppose me, da?" The Russian Nation asked, and chuckled, his water pipe tapping in his hands menacingly. "And besides... Jao-Jao loves Mother Russia too much to ever go against me-"
"He said it was because it seemed like a trap. Never did he mention it was out of love," France said, cowering behind America, waiting for the blow.
"KOLKOLKOL... WHEN CAN I JOIN, FRANCE?"
The other nations swiftly followed, signing the paper.
