Chapter 18
Tim didn't sleep on Friday night. He didn't sleep on Saturday night either. He spent Sunday morning packing to go to Matt's house and finally called the kennel where Jethro had been staying most of the time. Abby had taken him out as much as she could, but since her apartment didn't allow pets, Jethro needed a place to stay. Being on a large estate would be great for Jethro. He'd have more room than he'd know what to do with. After packing, he sat around waiting for the time when he could leave the oppressive feeling in his apartment. While he did so, he tinkered with his phone...and disabled the GPS chip in it so that he couldn't be tracked. He was pretty certain they'd try once they found out he'd quit. They wouldn't care until then. They wouldn't really care after either, but they'd feel like they had to do something. That was worse.
Then, Tim smiled. Why make it easy for them to try and assuage their deserved guilt? He picked up his phone again and removed the SIM card, replacing it with a prepay SIM card that had different information. He didn't actually remember when he'd purchased that card, but he was glad he remembered that he had it. He knew it wouldn't be perfect. If they got Abby on it, she'd be able to tell that he'd manipulated his phone information, but that's why he'd turned off the GPS chip. Then, he could turn off his phone and be, effectively, invisible...as far as people tracking his phone would be concerned. Abby knew Matt, but Tim hadn't really mentioned him to anyone else. Would Abby think of him? Probably not.
He would be free of them all. He could cut off all ties with the people he hated. Just like high school...never see them again. He would add them to his list of people not worth knowing, not worth giving the time of day. He hated them and that was it. He wouldn't try and deal with them anymore.
...and he wouldn't have to face the reality of knowing what he'd given up to do his job...and perhaps impress them. Since he'd failed, he wouldn't think about it anymore. No more failures.
x.x.x.x.x.x.x
"Leon, the phone's for you," Jackie said. "They'd better not want you in this morning. You promised!"
"Let me find out what it is before you get mad, Jackie," Vance said and took the phone. He didn't want to go in to NCIS himself. It was Sunday morning and he was enjoying the time with his family.
Jackie shook her finger at him and then went back into the kitchen.
"Vance."
"I'm sorry to bother you, Director. ...I've been transcribing the recordings from the operation. There are some...I think you should hear."
"Is it urgent?"
"No, sir. I just didn't want to file a request. I don't know exactly what I should do with it."
Curious, Vance sat down. "Can you play it for me now?"
"Yes, sir."
"Then, do that."
Vance listened...and then felt some confusion and a rising anger. "When was this?"
"Five months ago, Director Vance. It was from very early in the morning, about three a.m."
No reason they should have heard it, then...but every reason they should have known. He hadn't read Tim's report yet. He could go in this evening and do that. As much as he wanted to have an entire day to himself, this was his job, and he was beginning to wonder just how much had been covered up in this assignment.
"Thank you. Keep on with the transcription. Flag that, make a copy of it and send it to my office. I'll deal with it tomorrow."
"Yes, Director. Thank you."
"Thank you." Vance hung up and considered. He'd have to get to the bottom of this before tomorrow. That meant tonight...but not now.
"Leon?"
"I have to go in...but not until tonight, Jackie," Vance said, standing up. "Now, I believe that I was going to amaze you all with my grilling prowess this evening."
Jackie looked stern.
"Not until tonight."
"That will have to do, I guess."
Vance stood up and put his arms around her. She tried to stay stiff.
"Have I ever told you how much I love you?" he asked, kissing her.
Jackie smiled and kissed him back. "Not enough."
"EW! Get a room!"
Vance looked over Jackie's shoulder.
"I have a lot of rooms...and you have one, Jared. Do you need go to it?"
"Nope!" he said quickly. "I'll just go outside, then."
"You do that," Vance said, and kissed Jackie again.
"Yuck." But it was whispered very softly.
x.x.x.x.x.x.x
Finally, it was time to go. Tim grabbed his bags, looked out the window and checked to make sure that no one was there...particularly that Abby wasn't there. No sign of her car. Thank goodness. He was so glad to get away from his apartment.
He crept out into the hallway and headed down the stairs. As he walked across to his car, he kept looking around expecting...who, exactly? He wasn't sure, but he knew he didn't want to be seen by anyone.
x.x.x.x.x.x.x
After her morning run, Ziva couldn't be easy in her mind. Something told her that they had been a bit lax in dealing with Tim after the operation ended. Why was that? After all, she and Tony knew a lot more about undercover work than Tim did. They knew how hard it could be to let go.
Perhaps she could go and speak to Tim today. Maybe away from NCIS, after a day away from all of them, Tim would be easier to speak to. Maybe she could find out what had happened, what he was thinking. She thought about calling Tony, but the memory of Tim's reaction to anything Tony said made her dismiss it out of hand. No. This first foray would be better taken alone.
x.x.x.x.x.x.x
As Tim drove away from DC, away from Silver Spring, from all those places that were a part of the life he could no longer claim, he found his tension easing. Freedom. Jethro seemed a bit morose and kept whining a little at him. Tim tried to ignore it, but it bothered him.
"Shut up, Jethro. Soon you'll have acres to range over. Stop complaining," he muttered.
A pitiful whine and Jethro slipped to the floor, resting his chin forlornly on the seat and staring up at Tim with his big liquid eyes.
"Don't even try it. You'll like it at Matt's place."
Another whine.
"Look...if you keep this up, I'll stop this car and let you try and find your way to Abby's place. She always liked you best anyway."
Jethro whuffled at him but made no other noises as they drove north toward Goshen, Maryland. It was a totally different area from Silver Spring. Sprawling properties, huge houses...and quiet. Tim tried to quell the jealousy that arose. It wasn't Matt's fault that Tim's life had been utterly ruined. It wasn't his fault that Tim didn't have the same life.
He'll lord it over you. You should give him up, too. Give up on them all.
But no. Tim ignored the continual press of that little voice in his head. He wouldn't give up having Matt as a friend. He'd always been a friend.
Always?
Okay. No, not always, but since they had gotten to know each other.
What did it take? You had to give up knowing you were better.
No. That wasn't it.
He made you suppress how good you were, just to be accepted. People do that to you all the time! Why do you take it? Wuss.
But no. As insidious as that little voice was, Tim refused to listen to the denigration of his only real friend. He had thought Tony and Ziva were real friends, but he was wrong. Besides, if nothing else, he was getting to stay in an amazing house for a few months because of his friendship with Matt.
As he turned onto the road leading to Matt's home, he found that he was eager to get there, eager to finally be free. Even this car was something that bespoke a different life. A life that was no longer his own. He would be happy to let it all go.
x.x.x.x.x.x.x
"No need to go up and knock. He's not there. I already checked," Tony said. He was sitting on the steps leading into Tim's apartment.
"His car is gone," Ziva said, covering her surprise at seeing Tony there.
"Yeah, and so are a lot of his clothes. Maybe he went to a hotel?"
"I doubt that McGee would pay for a hotel. Perhaps he went to Ohio. Should we call his parents?"
"And let them know that we've lost their son? I don't think so," Tony said quickly. "I called the kennel. He picked up Jethro an hour or so ago. We didn't miss him by much...but I have no idea where to start looking."
Ziva thought about a BOLO, but immediately dismissed the idea. If Tim were angry at them for whatever reason, she didn't think that having the police looking for him would help matters. She sat down beside Tony and they both were quiet for a while, lost in their own thoughts.
"What do we do?"
"Wait for Monday, I guess. He'll have to come back," Tony said. "I'll stand behind you so he can't hit me again and we'll try and talk to him."
Ziva smiled. "Yes, I will protect you from the big scary McGee."
Tony laughed...and then sobered. "You know? I kind of miss the wussy McGee. I wish we had him back."
