Written By MusicAgainstTheHeart
Gaara sat on the couch, his feet resting on the oak coffee table that had recently been dusted by a can of 'pledge' and a dust rag. He sighed, content, for he had just finished cleaning the living room. Now, you may wonder, why the hell would Gaara be cleaning? It's all quite simple, really. See, anyone would do just about anything if they were threatened the exposure of ones beanie baby collection to ones whole village would one not? Of course one would, especially if you're a certain red haired, insomniac, is turned on by the sight of blood, stalked by fangirls and has an IQ of 140 (on estimate) teen then, yes, one would do just about anything to keep ones reputation from crashing, burning, and then dying beyond all recognition. So when Temari told Gaara to clean the living room, he did just that… and then some.
"COME ON, GAARA!!! WE'RE GOING SKYDIVING!!!"
His eyes shot open in a heartbeat and glared at me, as I had just offended him in several ways:
1. I was in his 'personal bubble' as he liked to call it, which extends in a four foot radius in all directions
2. I had interrupted his 'Me' time
3. I had suggested to do something that he had never heard of nor was he aware we were planning on doing it (he hates not being informed)
Before he could say, "Say that again, I don't think you weren't loud enough for me to understand." I shouted "WE'RE GOING SKYDIVING!!!"
He gave me a 'what the hell did you say to me, minion?!' look.
"Sk-I-Div-Ing" I sounded out. "Ya know, jumping out of planes, falling a couple thousand feet, then slowly drifting back to earth?"
He blinked. I blinked. He blinked again, "Your insane."
I smiled, "So I'm told. Now C'mon! Or we'll miss the demonstration!"
"No."
"Yes, now come on!" I said, "You need to 'get out' more."
"And we're doing that by risking death?"
"Yes. I mean, NO! Now come on!" His expression told me he wasn't about to go any where, any time soon, so, I brought out the big gun. "Who do you think told Temari about your little cough secret cough?"
Five seconds later and we were out the door.
~Several Hours Later In Which All Hell Breaks Loose~
After finally convincing Gaara that I had indeed taken my meds this morning, we arrived at the airport, in which, Gaara killed a guy whom had just bought curly fries from Arbys, we learned the basics and dangers of skydiving, Gaara killed the instructor, we got in our suites, got in the plane, flew up 11,000 feet or so in the air, and what day a know? Gaara kills the pilot, 'by accident' he says.
"So, um, what da we do now?" I ask as we start plummeting towards earth at 'your gonna crash, burn and die' speed.
Gaara said nothing; he just jumped out of the plane. I blinked. It took me a moment to realize he forgot the parachute (see what happens when you don't listen to/kill the instructor?!).
"Oh shit," Was all I said as I strapped on a conveniently located parachute and jumped. It didn't take long to find him, how many red dots fall out of the sky daily?
Using my 'mad skills', I soon found myself right next to him. I shouldn't have been surprised when all he was doing was crossing his arms and acting like jumping out of planes were as easy as breathing.
"I blame you." Was all he said as he continued to fall and I pulled the cord on the parachute, which then opened up and I began the 2,000-foot decent back to earth while he still continued to fall. Its not like I could hold on to him or anything, the parachutes were only meant for one person after all.
I continued to watch him until the little red dot that was he disappeared and a large mushroom cloud poofed up like While-E Coyote's.
~1, 873 Feet Later~
"I hate you."
"Its not my fault you jumped out of the plane without a parachute."
"How was I supposed to know that I needed that?" He said while pointing at the train that was still attached to my shoulders.
"Well if you hadn't killed the instructor OR the pilot, you would've known!"
"The Instructor's voice sounded weird. And I told you, it was an accident!"
"He was Australian! Of course his voice sounded funny!" (A/N I love Australians, I do not mean to insult)
"Hrm. I still hate you." He said as he bounced up and down like an accordion.
I watch too many cartoons.
