There hasn't been much I wish to say lately, but I suppose everything has it's place, and when one wishes to say something, they will.
But, not I.
I am William Tavington. Colonel Tavington. The Butcher. Mad Man. Killer. Saviour.
Call me what you will, I don't care any longer. I think, no I believe, that I stopped caring many years ago. In fact...
I stopped believing, many years ago.
Not that it matters, mind you. You are nothing to me, and if truth be told...and it will...I am nothing to you.
It's been so long since I enjoyed the company of a beautiful woman. This war leaves no opportunity for such pleasures. I have, however, had their company, just not in the way one wishes after awhile. I take them and leave them. They suit their purpose.
I had no desire for anything beyond that.
No.
Until SHE was put in my path. Why her? I have asked myself. Why this woman? I have asked God. And the only answer I recieve?
"Just because."
Why this woman? Why did she have to be the daughter of the Lord General, himself?
"Just because."
I want a better answer then that! Damn it, this is war! I must have answers that make sense! That do not leave me troubled and uneasy.
But yet...oh, but yet...
I am troubled.
I am uneasy.
Meeting her. Seducing her. Taking her.
And now...
I sit here staring out at the moonlight, and I wonder...wonder if and when, her father hears of this, what he will say? What he will do?
And what price I shall have to pay for my treason.
Yes, it is treason.
I can see her in the bed. Her red hair flowing over the pillow...her white skin glowing in the moonlight...and for just a moment...
I call myself traitor.
I am a Mad Man. For in having taken the daughter of the man who could undo me, I have betrayed him. I have betrayed my rank. I have committed treason.
Hang me, if you wish. I do not care.
Looking at her...needing her...wanting her...and oh God, why this feeling...
Why this feeling?
Of wanting to love her?
And knowing, as I always do, that in the end...
That in the end, I will betray her, as well.
We will remain here for a day or so more, and then be gone. She is to leave with us, as her father wants her to be with him. Where he knows she is safe. She AND her sister...he wants them safe.
But, does he realise, he has placed both of them right into the arms of a mad man?
Yes, I do call myself that.
I want both. I love both. I love one more. I want one more. I want to be lost in both of them.
This is war. I am a Colonel. I command an elite legion of fighting men.
We leave from here, to South Carolina. Perhaps there, I will forget this feeling...this irksome and maddening feeling of love?
Perhaps there...
I am being sent there for reasons known and unknown. I will recieve my orders when I arrive...and will hand over both sisters to their father. And yet...perhaps...
No, I will not think of that. To ask what I want of the Lord General...would be madness, indeed! To ask him for the hand of his daughter...maybe, for even both of them...
Treason.
Traitor.
Betrayal.
Perhaps, I should take her hand in marriage here, now, before we leave? She has already agreed to it. Maybe...
Treason.
Traitor.
Betrayal.
Death.
South Carolina.
I am William Tavington.
Colonel Tavington.
And whatever comes to pass from this...
I will love her forever.
Mad Man.
A/N: What's going to happen next? The next chapter shall be up shortly! R and R! Thank you kindly!
