This story… it won't get out of my head, and, despite my desire to NOT WRITE THIS, I'm doing it anyway. I'm sorry if the characters are a little out of sync from how they should be. I don't normally write OUaT fic.

Also, I'm going to write this under the assumption that nothing after "Queen of Hearts" ever happened.


"You know, Ms. Swan, I have been speaking to Dr. Hopper," Regina stated in her matter-of-fact way as she took a seat in her study and motioned for Emma to do the same.

"I didn't know that." Emma took a seat on the opposite end of the sofa, careful not to spill the coffee in her hand. "But I'm glad to hear it. Archie can help you, too, but I also know that talking to a shrink isn't the same as talking to a… well, to a," she frowned, unsure of how to finish the sentence. Giving up, she shrugged. "It's just different."

One well-manicured eyebrow lifted in an unspoken mocking statement as Regina took a sip of her coffee. "So it is."

"Look, we don't have to do this today." The blonde set her mug down on the table, then thought better of it and moved a coaster under it. "I really mean it when I say you can talk to me whenever."

"There's never a time I want to talk about it," the brunette snapped back, pulling her temper in at the last minute before she launched into a tirade about this world and the idiots within it. Closing her eyes, Regina mentally gathered her thoughts before opening her eyes again to search out the other woman. "Have you ever been addicted to something, Ms. Swan?"

"No, I haven't, but I have my own issues, like," Emma stopped to consider what she was about to do. However, Regina was willing to expose herself, so it only seemed fair that she would do the same in return, "the fear of never being loved, of always being rejected. That sort of messes with your head, you know?"

Regina scoffed. "I suppose you'll blame me for that." It was a statement of fact.

"I could," the sheriff answered truthfully but with far less venom than was thrown at her. "I won't, though, because this is about you, not about me. I'm not here to blame you for something and then retaliate for it. If I wanted to do that, I'd have done it a long time ago."

"I suppose you're right. This is not easy for me." Regina glanced around the room. "With the bug, I simply talk about my day, and he asks questions until something comes up. But this? This is far more…"

"Dangerous." Emma nodded. "Yeah, I know. I'm terrified that I'll tell you something you'll use against me later, too. If this is going to work, we'll have to call a truce. I'm willing."

"I'm agreeable to the idea. If I were not, you wouldn't be sitting her right now." The former mayor took a long sip from her coffee. "Do you remember the time you asked me how I became such a difficult person?"

The younger woman chuckled. "I remember it, but that's not exactly what I said."

"I'm not as crass as you are, Ms. Swan." Regina rolled her eyes and sat her empty mug on an open coaster on her side table. "The answer to your rhetorical question is that I wasn't always like this. There was a time where you and I would have gotten along very well, perhaps even have become friends."

At the thought, Emma blinked as she tried to keep the disbelief off of her face. "What happened?"

Regina ignored the failed attempt and, instead, answered the question. "My mother happened. She had plans for me before I was ever born, and my father's gentle spirit did not hold up at all against her wrath. I'm sure you're familiar with her moods by now?"

"Yeah, she's one scary bit…"

"Yes." The brunette frowned in disapproval. "As a young girl, I spent a great deal of my time trying to please her, but I never quite managed. In retaliation for my failed attempts at perfection, my mother would use magic to constrain and correct me."

Emma's mind raced to keep up with the real story behind the placid tone and none emotional words she was being fed. The picture coming together in her head was one that was far worse than what she'd guessed had happened. "She abused you?"

"My mother loved me. She just wasn't very good at showing it." Regina glanced away to look out the window toward the apple tree in her backyard. "She wanted to teach me to be independent, strong willed, and to have no weaknesses." she sighed. "She wanted me powerful."

For a time, they were quiet. It was Emma who finally breached it, but her words felt awkward and clumsy in her mouth. "You are, you know?" At the quick look from the other woman, she clarified. "You are powerful, and you're independent and very strong willed." She shrugged. "But everyone has weaknesses. That's just human nature."

"My weakness caused me to lose that which I loved the most." The words were out before Regina could stop them, and she was caught between wanting to finish the story so someone else would know and not wanting to give up such a large part of herself. But, she reasoned, that was the whole point of this exercise, and, if Emma were to break her word, she could always kill her. That thought made her wince. It was thoughts such as that which had led her to where she was now in her life. "Did your mother explain what happened between us?"

Emma nodded. "She said it was her fault because she told your mother about Daniel."

"Did she tell you that, on the day he and I were going to run away and be married, my mother ripped his heart from his chest and crushed it to dust while I watched? Did she tell you that the only reason my mother knew about it was because Snow found out and told her after giving me her word she would not tell my mother?" Regina's gaze became piercing as she spoke, eyes daring Emma to look away from her. "Did she tell you that her father, your grandfather, proposed to me and I was forced to marry him at the age of 18? Did she tell you that I spent my young adult life catering to her father's whims, all of them, as he pleased until I had him killed?"

"You killed my grandfather?" As soon as she said it, Emma knew it was the wrong thing to comment on.

"I think you need to leave now, Ms. Swan." Regina stood and headed to the front door. "You've over stayed your welcome."

"No, wait a minute," Emma stood and followed the older woman toward the door as she tried to fix her mistake. "I didn't mean it like that. I just meant," she sighed in aggravation. "Look, just," stopping at the now open front door, she gave Regina a pleading look, "give me a chance here, okay? There's a lot I don't know, and I'm learning as I go here. But I do want to help, and I'm not going to judge you."

"Of course you are." Regina's eyes flared with anger. "It's what you Charmings do. You never stop to think of the consequences of your actions because you think what you're doing is 'good'. Let me tell you a little something about good, Sheriff. It's an easy excuse to overlook the evil that's happening because of your 'good deed'." She held the door open further. "Get out."

"Regina, I…"

"Get. Out." The former queen's chin rose slightly, her face becoming haughty and arrogant as she said in a chillingly cool voice, "Or I will remove you myself."

"Okay, alright." Emma held her hands up in defeat. "I'm going, but I'm not leaving you alone, Regina." She stepped out onto the porch and turned toward the swiftly closing door. "You're not alone in this anymore," she yelled as the door slammed shut in her face. Closing her eyes and shaking her head, she mumbled to herself, "You just have trust me first."