So, Zelda and Link have had their little adventures...or have they?
In any case, let's move on to Ganondorf. He's going to visit the Guerudo. An all female society. Uh huh. He's one hunk by now. So...how's it gonna go?
I don't own this, and Enjoy!
And Review.
The End.
At the guerudo desert
Ganondorf drew himself up to full height and strode bravely into the guerudo camp. Yeah… an all girl clan and no link around… he had this thing down. Like the world was ACTUALLY handed over to him on a silver platter. Except that the world was much bigger than this tiny town.
Two guard woman stood at the entrance. Wearing belly shirts. As Ganondorf tried to move past them, they pulled out spears and stopped him.
"No boys allowed." One said flatly.
"Ladies, please, I am your kin-OOF!" a hard something collided with his cheek, knocking him backwards. He hit the sand hard.
Ganondorf leapt to his feet. A few women had came out of their tents to watch.
"Oh, it's ON, now!" Ganondorf said, raising his fists. "But wait, I can't hit a girl!"
"Which is why I have an advantage." Said the guerudo guard, kicking him in the nuts.
"OW! Oh, sweet mama, ow ow ow ow!" Ganondorf bent over in pain. A watching guerudo ran forward and jumped on top of his head, knocking him onto the ground. Again.
This is humiliating. Ganondorf thought, while the chicks cheered and high-fived. I'm so glad nobody's watching.
Up in the sky
"YOU WUSS!" Din screamed, pounding on the ground and watching ganondorf be creamed by a band of skinny girls. Nayru was laughing and bragging about how her Zelda had helped people and how a boy hit on her, and how she was acting so elegant and what a 'king of darkness' Ganondorf was. Farore was laughing and crying as link found Navi sleeping in 'his' bed, and picked her up, and was talking to her and smiling. And Navi told him about an ocarina, and gave it to link, who stared at it as he had done to the kuyan lavender, and put it into his pouch. Farore began to cry.
"It's so sweet!" she whispered, weeping as Link put Navi on his shoulder and began to head to Ordon.
"Some big king who can't even attack his own kingdom!" Nayru snickered.
"SHUT THE HELL UP!" Din hissed and screamed, and below Death Mountain erupted into a fountain of lava, shooting up into the sky and evaporating clouds.
Nayru shook her head and snickered. Din turned back to Ganondorf with murder in her eyes.
"FIGHT! WIN!" she screeched. "WIN! GAH!"
Ganondorf was, once again, flipped onto his back.
"SISSY! YOU'LL GET A BEATING! YOU HEAR ME?" She screamed until she cried and she cried until she passed out and remained unconscious until she woke up and screamed again.
Back in Guerudo Desert
"OK! To heck with rules! I'll hit a girl!" Ganondorf yelled. He punched the closest guerudo in the stomach and sent her flying.
He could've sworn the sky was cheering and screaming curse words.
Half of the guerudo girls stopped attacking, and one even whispered some words he could barely hear-
"He's hot!"
Ganondorf smiled and sent another girl flying, as to which a quarter of the girls stopped to giggle and whisper-
"Did you see his muscles?"
By this time Ganondorf battled a stronger one. Since she was light and jumped a lot, so she was hard to hit. Finally she tired out and couldn't jump as high, and he knocked her to the ground.
Now all the girls had stopped attacking, and stood in a large group so they could giggle to each other.
That was barely anything compared to link… Ganondorf thought. But I do have larger muscles. And they haven't had a boy around here to show them off for centuries!
The girls were still giggling and whispering. One of them stumbled up to ganondorf nervously.
"Um… you're allowed in… if… if you want to…"
"Well, I'd be glad to!" He said, thumping her on the back. "Come. Let us go in!"
She beamed at him and ran back inside the camp.
"He said YES!" she shrieked. All the girls screamed and jumped and stamped their feet.
Ganondorf walked bravely into the camp, smiling. The girls fanned themselves with their hands. It was such a shame that he would have to go back to Ordon in an hour.
Poor him. Only so much time to spend in his kingdom of hot chicks. Oh, how he suffers.
I know, the Guerudos were slightly Out Of Character, but meh. Whatever.
If you have a problem, shut up.
I know we all have cold, evil, black hearts. But cold, evil people with black hearts review. So...you know...live up to that.
Or Ganondorf will do something drastic.
Peace!c(:
