OK, here it is. The last bit of chapter 15. Long, no? If you're obsessive, you might notice that age fifteen was longer then all ages before it combined.

Anyone who guessed that Shai and Daish were descendants of Shad and Ashei were correct. Again, the names give it away. If you support ShadxAshei, then those two got together. If you don't, then Shad and Ashei married some other people, had kids, and those kids work together in the medical field.

So, sorry to disappoint a certain someone, but Shia is not descended from Cremia, and Daish is not descended from Pit.

A few sentences later, you will read something that doesn't totally make sense. Just go with it.

I don't own LoZ, so enjoy!

As they neared the western gate, Link saw a thin woman staring at him. She wore a dress in the comforting color of blue, and long golden hair flowed down her back. He leaned out of the wagon.

"Link?" She whispered.

"Mom?"

Link leaned farther out the wagon. "Mom!"

Watching, Farore gasped and quickly cast a memory-wiping spell on Link. Nayru said that he had also been getting flashes of memories. He had the most to remember. She told Farore to wipe it good or he'll remember too much.

Link suddenly felt woozy. As Epona trotted out of castle town, He wondered what he was doing leaning out of the wagon and pulled himself back in.

"What now?" Link asked as Epona settled down in Hyrule field. It was nice and sunny, and there was a small lake off to one side.

Zelda was stirring.

Ganondorf slid off Epona and walked around to the back of the wagon.

"Brag to Zelda about how we saved her butt?" he asked thoughtfully. Link frowned.

"Sure. But then let's go back to Ordon."

Zelda sat up groggily.

"Are you crazy?" Ganondorf asked, helping Zelda out of the wagon. Link shook his head.

"I mean, if Zelda can get into it, we can go to the festival some people talked about earlier!" He said. "I'm starved."

Ganondorf thought about it.

"Alright." He said.

Zelda blinked in the sunlight.

"What…?" she asked.

"Ord-"

"You passed out." Link explained. "We saved your butt."

Zelda would have glared at him, but she knew it was true.

"I remember… a wolf…"

Link shook his head vigorously.

"You hallucinated." He said. "Loss of blood."

Ganondorf put a hand on Link's head to stoop him from shaking it.

"I think we're all woozy." He said. Zelda fell into Link's arms, exhausted.

"HEY!" Ganondorf yelled. Link beamed at him and held Zelda tightly.

"Nyeah."

"HEY!"

In the sky

"Lemme Zap him!" Din yelled.

"No, Din! That's not fair!" Farore gripped her sister around the waist. "Link's SUPPOSED to get Zelda!"

"LEMME ZAP HIM!" Din screamed.

"DIN!" Nayru burst out of the kitchen, holding a bag of flour. "DIN!"

She ran out and gripped Din's black-red hair with her free hand.

"RESTRAIN YOURSELF!" She screamed. Din hissed and continued to insist on zapping Link.

Down below

"Zelda, maybe we shouldn't go…." Link said as Zelda opened her eyes. She looked up into link's smile and turned bright red.

"N-no! I'm fine!" she pulled away.

"HAH!" Ganondorf yelled. Link looked at him quizzically. He turned to Zelda.

"You sure?" he asked.

"Yes!" Zelda turned away, arms crossed.

"You lost a lot of blood. You're sure?" Link asked.

"Link, a lady can do what she wants." Ganondorf said. Link smacked his forehead.

"Whatever. It's a long walk. Let's go." He patted Epona. "I want to ride her this time."

Ganondorf agreed grudgingly. He climbed into the back of the wagon. Where Navi was sniffing the wood. Zelda and Ganondorf stared at her. The wagon began to move.

They reached Ordon by nightfall.

"We have to wear disguises…" Link whispered as they trotted into the province. Ganondorf bit his lip.

"Hey! Look in the barn!" He whispered back. Link pulled his hat over his face and looked. There were five outfits laid out.

"Brilliant. We're going to a festival in some poop outfit." Zelda growled, gripping her dress in a way that said she would never take it off in a million years thank you very much.

"What was that?" Link asked.

"Nothing." Zelda said quickly.

Link steered Epona into the shadows and hopped off.

"Sneak out." He whispered.

"I'm not an idiot." Ganondorf retorted. Link glared at him and unhooked the wagon. Epona trotted into the barn.

"Hey, what about me? Will they recognize me?" Navi piped up.

"Not if you hide in my pouch." Link replied. "Here, I'll make room."

"What? No!" Navi flew up into the air.

"Whoops." Link uncorked his bottle and slipped her inside it.

"Now, let's go." Ganondorf said, snickering slightly as Navi screamed in rage and pounded on the bottle.

"She'll be alright?" Zelda asked. "She has air holes?"

"'course." Link said. They walked inside the barn.

"I'll go into that stall." Zelda said, picking up an outfit and a ribbon.

"Ok." Link picked up some clothes. He smiled and picked up a shredded off piece of cloth for navi. Before he walked into the stall, he told Ganondorf he had picked up a girl's outfit and that a boy's one was over there.

"Thanks." Ganondorf picked up the boy's outfit.

Zelda tied up her hair and let some strands fall over her face, using her fingers to mess up the back. She slipped out of her dress and struggled into the itchy rags that were from Ordon.

Zelda smudged dirt on her arms and face to look even more like she was from Ordon.

"Why are we not welcome in Ordon again?" Zelda asked, tearing the dress around the edges. She reached up to tear the ribbon. Her fingers slipped.

"Because. Well, because we stole a horse to save your life." Link answered from the other side of the stall. He was letting Navi wrap the tiny cloth around her and drape some on her wings. She flew over to Zelda.

Link took off his hat and tied the pieces of cloth onto him with a rope he found on a wall.

"Whoops." Zelda stared down at her quarter-exposed chest.

"Ah, well." She picked up a horse hair and tied it to a small, hollowed out stone. She tied the poorly made necklace around her neck.

"Zelda, can you make me big?" Navi asked. "Like a human?"

Zelda nodded and put her hands together, concentrating hard.

Ganondorf was finished putting on his Ordanian outfit. He smudged dirt on his evenly tanned skin and lightened it up.

He tied a ribbon-ish cloth around his neck. Then he put on a thin, comfy jacket that resembled his guerudo one slightly. Except it had no guerudo symbols that he loved so much.

Link dusted some dried dirt into his dirty blond hair and turned it completely light brown.

They all stared at their reflections in the bucket of water that horses drank out of, decided they looked good, and walked out.

"Wow!" Link stared at Zelda, who had walked into the stall as a princess, and who had came out as a pretty farm girl with her hair tied up and dirt all over her face. Zelda always hated anything holding her hair up on her head. It always had to fall around her shoulders or be tied at the bottom. Also, a quarter of her chest was exposed. Zelda never let that happen.

"You totally look different!" Link smiled. "Ganondorf, wipe that drool off your face."

"I am NOT drooling!" Ganondorf exclaimed.

"I suppose your nose isn't bleeding either, then?"

Zelda stopped the fight by complementing how much Ganondorf looked different.

"What did you use? Dirt?" she asked, talking about his lighter skin.

"Yeah. Does it look weird?" He asked.

"Not at all." She smiled at him. Link's eyes flashed anger.

"What about me?" He asked.

"I didn't think you were Link at first!" Zelda said. "Your hair is different. I'm too used to the hat."

"Thanks, Zel. Navi?" Link asked. He turned around. "Navi? Where are you?"

"You don't see me?" Navi asked, stepping out and twirling around. She had designed the scraps perfectly to make it look like a gown and her wings made her look like a, well, a fairy.

"You're human! Brilliant!" Link said, beaming at her.

"I look good?" Navi blushed.

"Like a goddess." Zelda said.

"Sexy!" Ganondorf said. Link hit him, but he was laughing. Navi turned violet.

"Really?" She squeaked. Ganondorf nodded and received another slap.

"Ow! What's wrong with the truth?"

"Perverted things, that's what!"

"You wanna do this?"

"Bring it on!"

"Let's go. I'm hungry." Zelda said quietly, silencing them. They followed her out the door, still bickering quietly.

They sat themselves down at a large table.

"I'm so hungry…" Ganondorf moaned. The Ordon people were sitting themselves down, too.

Link put his arm around Zelda. She glared at him.

"Ahem." She said in an annoyed tone. Link looked down at her.

"Wouldn't it be more convincing if we were seen as a couple?" he asked. Zelda scowled.

"Yes." She said bitterly.

"Well, then." Link smiled. "You have to look happy about it, too."

Zelda grinned.

"I hate you." she said. Link grinned back and ruffled her hair. Ganondorf just happened to look their way.

Ganondorf glared at them.

"No fair." He huffed. Zelda put her head on Link's shoulder.

"It's all for the safety of them not finding out." Zelda said. "We all know that there's no way that me and Link could be a couple."

Link's ears drooped.

"Yeah." He said weakly. Ganondorf laughed.

"If it makes you feel better, we could convince them I'm your girlfriend." Navi offered. She leaned on his arm.

"That would be nice." Ganondorf put his arm around her. Link scowled.

"My fairy." He growled. Zelda hugged him.

"Shush. It's not like he can do anything to her. She'll turn into a fairy at a quarter to midnight."

Link hugged her back. Ganondorf stuck his tongue out.

"LET'S FEAST!" boomed the mayor, causing them all to jump.

"Appetizers!" Zelda said. "Look!"

Two children walked around, holding giant bowls that everybody took a handful from.

When they reached Link, Zelda, Ganondorf and Navi, the bowls were half empty. They peered inside.

"Peanut?" the children asked. Link coughed.

"No thank you." he said.

"Ganondorf, don't eat any." Zelda said, slapping his hand away. Navi stuck her nose in the air and pushed the bowl away to resist temptation. Confused, the children continued onto the next people.

"The main course!" The mayor boomed. The same children put giant bowls onto the table.

"Pumpkin!" they chimed.

"Isn't that related to squash?" Navi said.

"Yeah. Don't eat any." Link pushed the giant bowls away.

"But…"

"Snacks!" the mayor cut them off. Giant platters of strawberries were placed in front of them.

"No thank you." Zelda said loudly. Link pulled her to her feet.

"Let's go dance." He suggested. "To get away from the smell."

"Ok…" Zelda blushed and let Link pull her over to a small patch of grass. Some people were playing music.

*NOTE! Put on some cool music right now and picture them dancing! I'm serious! There is no reading this without it! Now now now NOW!*

He put his hands on her waist. She put her arms on his shoulders. They began to dance slowly. The music picked up.

"Fun, isn't it?" Link asked, twirling her around in some quick movements.

"Yeah." Zelda smiled at him and twirled willingly.

"Hey, navi lets dance." Ganondorf said, pulling her to her feet. "c'mon."

"Okay!"

Navi got to her feet. She and Ganondorf began to dance. A sun dial showed that it was already eleven 'o clock. One more hour.

They danced until they were sweaty and red, and had to cool off. Together, they sat down by the small lake.

"Navi, you'll turn into a fairy again soon." Zelda warned, panting slightly.

"I know." Navi dipped her feet into the lake. "Ooh, it's nice and cold."

She lowered herself into the pond slowly. The water soaked into her clothes.

"Hey, that looks like fun!" Ganondorf followed her, and Zelda soon joined them. Link dipped his feet in. Zelda broke the surface, laughing.

"Link! c'mon!"

"No thanks." He kicked the water back and forth.

"c'mon!" Navi chimed in. "join us!"

"Nope. Sorry." Link smiled and splashed a little water into her face.

"Oh!" Navi scooped up some water and thrust it toward him.

"Hey!"

Unnoticed, Ganondorf silently swam under Link.

"BWA HA!" He suddenly jumped out and yanked Link into the lake by the ankles. A few people had stopped dancing to figure out what the commotion was all about.

"GRAAA!" Link jumped on top of Ganondorf. Some people craned their necks to see. The dirt that they had put on as disguises wore off. Link's hair turned its normal blond. Ganondorf's skin turned its normal, tanned color. Without the dirt on her face, Zelda looked like royalty.

A quarter to midnight. Navi turned into a fairy with a *pop*.

"It's the thieves!" Shrieked a woman.

"And Link!" screamed Ilia.

"And that idiot who wounded me!" Odim yelled.

They advanced slowly.

"Kill them!" Screamed Ilia.

Link grabbed Zelda around the waist protectively. Ganondorf saw. His comedian mind thought of something.

"What are you doing with my wife?" He yelled. Link looked confused. So did the people from Ordon.

Suddenly, Link caught on.

"What haven't I done with your wife?" He yelled back. Ilia gasped in horror.

Zelda looked up at him, venom in her eyes.

"Bear with it." He whispered.

"You life-ruiner!" Ganondorf yelled. "Give me my wife!"

"You're one to talk! She's mine!"

"Why should you care?" Zelda shrieked, jumping in between them. "You're both GAY!"

Everybody gasped, including Link and Ganondorf. How clever.

"How did you find out?" Ganondorf gasped. Ten minutes to midnight. Above, the goddesses were getting ready to bring them back. Farore was busily arranging things on a giant table.

Link's stomach rumbled.

"Never mind how she found out!" He yelled, trying to get rid of his hunger. "What matters is our love! Kiss me, both of you!"

Ilia fainted. So did half the people of Ordon.

Seven more minutes.

"But I don't even love you!" Ganondorf declared. "I love…. Odim!"

Link gasped dramatically.

"What?" Odim screamed. He clutched his chest and fell backwards, unconscious.

"But Ganondorf!" Navi said loudly, so she could be heard. Inspiration had struck. "I thought… that night in the woods…"

"No, Navi. Truth be told, you are a fairy. It does not add up."

"Oh, but I can become human!"

"But I am a gay man! It could never, ever be!"

"But… what if I told you I was really a man?"

Link clasped a hand over his mouth to stop from guffawing.

"Do you have a weenie?" Ganondorf asked quizzically. Zelda clutched her sides. She needed to laugh so badly it hurt.

Four more minutes. They had to keep this up for four more minutes.

"Yes!" Navi screamed. Link and Zelda put hands over their hearts in a melodrama stance.

The last standing person from Ordon fainted. Everybody stopped striking dramatic poses. They were all silent, and stared at each other, not believing what they had just done.

Suddenly, Zelda exploded into laughter. Link collapsed into the lake, laughing harder then Zelda. Navi fell into the water, laughing so hard she couldn't fly anymore. Ganondorf tossed his head back and laughed like there was no tomorrow.

They all laughed until they had to catch their breath, looked at each other, and started to laugh all over again. They were sopping wet and shivering by the time it was midnight.

"Shun lo ki… ZEM!" the three goddesses chanted. Link grabbed hold of Navi and they swirled upward. Ganondorf and Zelda followed. There was a bright light, and they were shot up into the clouds.

In the sky

They arrived, leaving a giant puddle on the floor, in the living room. The goddesses stood, arms crossed.

"Um…"

"We saw the whole thing." Nayru said. "Everything."

"The dance, the splashing, and the inappropriate distraction." Farore said, counting off on her fingers.

"Sorry…" Zelda stared at her feet. Link and Ganondorf hung their heads in shame.

"Don't be! It was HILARIOUS!" Din screamed, running forward and hugging Ganondorf. Farore seized link and held him tight, scolding him quietly.

Nayru wrapped her arms around Zelda.

"You're not my little princess anymore." She whispered.

They hugged their Goddesses. Navi hugged Farore's head.

"Din?" Ganondorf said, letting go of his goddess.

"What is it?" she asked. Ganondorf looked up at her with pleading eyes.

"I'm SOOOO hungry!" He wailed. Link and Zelda sobbed agreement.

The goddesses grinned at each other.

"Why didn't you eat?" Nayru asked.

"We couldn't eat anything!" Zelda cried. Link gripped Farore's shirt.

"We could have DIED!" He yelled. "There were peanuts and pumpkin and strawberries and EVERYTHING!"

"Pumpkins?" Farore mouthed.

"I think they're related to squash." Din mouthed back.

"Well, we'll have to fix something. Come to the kitchen." Nayru guided the kids into the kitchen, giggling silently. She stood in front of the kitchen door, excited.

With a flick of her wrist, Nayru opened the kitchen door.

Link was dumbstruck.

Ganondorf was frozen.

Zelda nearly fainted.

Laid out in front of them was a huge table, filled with warm bread, brownies, pie, jambalaya (a rice dish Zelda enjoyed), tarts, potatoes, steak, ham, a giant bowl of soup and pitchers filled with various juices.

The goddesses waited.

Ganondorf was the first one to move.

"FOOOOOD!" He yelled, launching himself into a chair and beginning to put truckloads of food onto his plate. Link grabbed Zelda's hand and they ran into the kitchen, both filling their plates. The goddesses sat themselves down and smiled. The three teenagers gobbled and gobbled.

Farore was talking to Navi.

"We should get you a room." Farore decided. "A nice large box with a flower petal bed and a blue candle. Maybe some nice clothes."

Navi nodded and took a drop of soup out of the bowl. She slurped as Farore continued to go on and on about her new room. Then she tried to eat a whole entire pea.

Link walked outside, leaving Ganondorf to eat a whole pot roast.

He sat down by the goddess's fountain and fumbled around in his pouch for the small sack of shadow dust. His fingers fell upon it and he pulled it out.

He also pulled out the empty bottle and set it down next to him.

Taking a deep breath, he opened the sack.

"Link?"

"Hunh?" Link turned around and clamped his fist around the opening of the sack. Zelda was standing at the temple/house exit, her brownish-blond hair illuminated by moonlight.

"What are you doing?" She asked.

"Nothing!" Link hid the sack between his knees. "Uh… watching the moonlight. You should go eat something."

"Oh. Do you mind if I join you?" Zelda asked.

"Yes." Link mumbled sheepishly.

"Oh." Zelda said quietly. She turned and walked back into the temple/house.

Link sighed and watched her leave. Then he pulled the sack open again. Taking a big breath, he took a pinch of it and quickly tossed it over his head. Immediately, he felt pressure around him, making it hard to breath. He fell backwards into the fountain, cringing.

It was gone. Link opened his eyes and stared at his own two hands.

"What?" He sat up, his wet tunic clinging to him.

Link was pleased to find out that the fountain served the same purpose as the Ordon spiritual spring did. He filled his bottle and tucked it back into his pouch along with the sack of shadow dust. Then he walked back to the temple/house, ignoring the fact that Zelda would be suspicious of the fact that he was soaking wet.

Link and Ganondorf sat in the bath tub while Zelda was in the shower. Farore was carefully constructing Navi's box-room.

"It's not fair. How come she gets the shower?" Ganondorf asked. Link shrugged.

"I'm just glad we can't see anything through the steam."

"Stupid steam." Ganondorf grumbled. Zelda sighed loudly.

"Where's the shampoo?" Link asked, feeling around the bath water.

"OW!" Ganondorf screamed. He slapped link across the face.

"Sorry! God, sorry! I thought it was the shampoo!"

Zelda sighed again. "What did he grab?"

"Ok, first, I'd like to clarify that it was an accident."

"GAH! Never mind!" Ganondorf yelled, waving his arms around. "Back to the Zelda-shower matter!"

"It's a one-person shower, nincompoop."

"AH! Large words hurt my brain!" Ganondorf said.

Zelda ignored him. "Also, aren't you guys gay?"

Link and Ganondorf's mouths hung open.

"You're going to hold that against us for the rest of our lives, aren't you?" Link asked, sitting putting his hands in front of him and splashing a little bit.. Zelda smiled.

"Oh-ho-ho yes."


Zelda crawled into bed, Navi's new box-room on her bedside table. She was full and happy. So was Navi.

Link and Ganondorf Slipped under the covers, their stomachs bulging. Ganondorf had had seconds of every food that was on the table. Link only had seconds of his favorite food.

The three goddesses drifted into bed, exhausted and satisfied. Sure, they had gotten in trouble in both Ordon and Castle town, but it was OK. They felt as if they had just wrestled a Goron.

Everybody slipped off to sleep.

Except for Din. She was disappointed that they hadn't met a Goron yet.

Yay! Long chapter!

First, I must say, I have absolutely nothing against gay people. If you're attracted to the same sex, whatever. I couldn't care less who you're attracted to. If that's the way you roll, then keep on rolling. Really. I don't see what other people have against it. But enough of my rambling.

They only did that as a distraction. So no flaming me for putting in something I thought was a funny distraction. Also, Din agrees with me. So there. Flame and awaken the wrath of a fictional character that has no influence on the real world whatsoever!

But, um, yeah. Review.