A/N: Yes, an early chapter because I have more time than anticipated today. Say you love me...in a review ;)! It's Edward's turn to endure Kate the Monster!

French kiss? French kiss? She is kidding, she has to be kidding.

"Are you kidding?" I ask, completely stunned.

"Do you mean right now, or in general? Because I consider myself a pretty funny person but right now, I'm dead serious." Her voice was wavering a little, as she was about to burst into laughter.

"I can't French kiss you, it's just ridiculous!" I protested. Emmett, Angela and Ben were looking at me with smirks on their faces. I almost growled at them.

"Look, Edward. I understand from what Ben told me that you need to impress that woman, to provoke her in a way that'll make her react. Trust me, what would work on a seventeen-year-old won't work on her." She said, her tone sure and almost patronizing.

"You know who she is?" I asked, my furious eyes on Ben. He shrugged and mouthed a sheepish "sorry".

"Yes, I know and before you get all worried and nervous, your secret's safe with me. I have secrets of my own, you know. I guess Ben told you about my situation?" She sounded almost shy, like I was going to betray her in front of everyone.

"Yes, he did. Look, Kate, I'm not sure about this." I had never felt less sure about anything.

"Edward, I get that. Kissing another person in front of the one I love? Eeww. However, you have to get a reaction out of her. Am I wrong?"

"No, you're not." I reluctantly admitted. "How is it going to work?" I asked, resigned.

"Well, we need to establish our "love" in front of the other students first." I snorted. She had a dry sense of humor that'd probably help in the mess we were about to enter.

"We must kiss and be quite, hmm, provocative about it. So everyone knows Edward Cullen is spoken for." She continued.

"Hence, the French kissing part?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"Hence the French kissing part. After that, everyone in the school will know about us in an hour, tops. Including the teachers."

"Yes, but after that? What's going to happen? We can follow her everywhere and start kissing every time she's around, right?" Kate started laughing, loudly.

"Ah, Edward! You must have been really blind to everyone else in the room, buddy. You didn't even realize I was in your French group?" She finally calmed down.

"No, I didn't…hmm, sorry." How dumb was I?

"That's ok, Miss Swan is a hot piece of ass, I understand." She said in an airy voice.

I almost choked on my tongue.

"Kate, I don't want you talking about her like that, you hear me?" I stuttered.

"Ah, like you don't find her hot too! Don't be a hypocrite, please."

"I'm not but I don't want you to call her that, do you understand?" I was furious…and kind of turned on. Bella was really hot…and her ass was very nice as well.

"Whatever, Edward…" Kate sighed, "Come pick me up tomorrow morning, 12 Cedar Street, seven- thirty sharp. And, brace yourself, you're gonna need it." She hung up.

I slowly turned back to the others and they were anxiously waiting for my reaction.

"Well?" Angela and Ben asked in chorus while Emmett raised his hands in question.

"She's going to help me and I'm picking her up tomorrow morning." I finally said, and started pulling my hair. This was going to end in disaster.

"Kate is a strange cookie, but she's loyal and contrary to what you might think, a hopeless romantic. She wants to help you get the girl." Angela commented softly.

"I'll never get her…How could I get her?" I whispered, suddenly disheartened.

"Because she wants you too, bro, I'm sure of that. The way she looked at you, I'm positive she feels the same way you do." Emmett awkwardly patted my shoulder.

Angela and Ben left shortly after and I braced myself for a long evening and an even longer night. I asked Mom about Dr. Masen's visit during dinner and she simply said she had met him during her morning walk and consequently invited him for tea. She seemed a little embarrassed, though and I couldn't help but think there was more to the story than that.

As I suspected, I couldn't get a lot of sleep that night. I was anxious about the next day and how Bella was going to react if she heard about Kate and I. I was also painfully reminded, thanks to Kate's crude remark, of Bella's physical appeal and…well, let's just say I had to take things into my own hands. Three times.

I finally fell asleep around four in the morning and before I knew it, I had to get up and get ready. Emmett told me Angela and Ben would pick me up so Kate and I could discuss our plan of action. I was a little nervous. Ok, a lot nervous.

It turned out she was a very nice girl and we got along well, almost instantly. She put me at ease, told me she understood better than I thought and couldn't wait to be out of Forks to finally live her relationship with Irina in the open. She said her parents were ok with it but she didn't want to be the object of scrutiny, which would undoubtedly happen in such a small town. That made sense.

When we made it out of the car, she squeezed my arm and whispered "Relax, it's time for the show to start."

She had just settled between my legs when she tensed. She pretended to lick my ear but actually informed me that Bella had just parked her car and was on her way to the entrance building. She would see us. Oh my God, time to act.

Kate kissed me, and to her credit, she was very good. I felt very self-conscious and aware that Bella would see me so I kissed her back with as much conviction as I could muster. When we ended it, I raised my eyes to Bella and saw her hurt face, not to mention the way she was running out of there. If it wasn't for Kate restraining me, I would have followed her and begged for her forgiveness. But, no, I had to be strong. Maybe it would turn badly but I had to take a chance.

The second step was much harder than the first one. Certainly, we had to face the gossip and the rumors of our classmates on Monday but I knew I had to see Bella on Tuesday, in class and I didn't dare imagine how I'd feel and how she'd react, seeing Kate and I together.

We entered the class, Kate winking at me and grasping my hand firmly. I saw Bella frown and mutter to herself. I tried to relax but it was really hard. I pretended to nonchalantly chat with my girlfriend before class started but I observed Bella, not being able to get enough of her. She wore a much stricter outfit today but she looked as beautiful as ever.

Class was a nightmare. I had to pretend being the doting boyfriend, and I hurt every time Bella's lips stretched into a hard line. Her eyes were sad and bitter and I couldn't help but think I was the cause of it. She never looked at me, or Kate, not once but she knew. She saw us.

We were about to get out of class and Kate made a show of kissing my neck and grabbing my ass in front of Bella. I wanted to push her away and give up the whole plan but Kate whispered "It's working." in my ear. I understood what she meant when I saw Bella looking at us. Her eyes were on fire.

Before I could understand what was happening, she opened her mouth and harshly spat:

"Mr. Cullen, when you're finished swallowing Miss Franklin, stay for a minute. I need to talk to you."

Edward is in big trouble, you folks! Ideas, theories? Let me know…Next chapter, in a few days.