Deep breaths everyone, it's Bella's turn. I missed you guys but I had a wonderful time with my family :).

I could feel my whole body shaking. Nervous flutters agitated my stomach as well, stress like I'd never experienced before. I wanted to hate Alice's guts and be angry but that could wait until later. It didn't matter right now. What mattered was surviving and protecting my Edward. He couldn't suffer from my stupidity and irresponsibility. I would suffer the consequences, not him. I'd never allow that.

I entered Banner's office after hearing his soft "Enter". His voice seemed strained and sad, which surprised me. Shouldn't he be mad at me, ready to tear my head off? He just sounded tired.

"Mr. Banner? I heard you wanted to see me, sir." I kept my tone completely neutral. It was hard to be that detached when I was screaming inside.

"Not particularly, but since you're here…" He mumbled, his eyes unfocused, a bitter twist in his mouth.

"I'm afraid I don't understand…" I tried, ashamed of being such a coward.

"DON'T!" He yelled, making me jump. He cleared his throat.

"Don't even bother lying to me. I want the truth, Bella, you hear me?" His voice was softer but still so angry it shook.

"I hear you." I answered, trying desperately to keep calm. It was almost inhumanely hard, my panting breath threatening to betray me.

"Alright, so open your ears then. I don't want to hear a sound out of you right now, are we clear? Just listen to me." He sounded so stern I felt like I was a child, scolded for smoking or stealing. It felt that way even if I knew it was much more serious than that.

"I've always liked you. From the first time I met you, I've always thought you're a very special young woman. I've also always known you were a troubled young woman."

"Mr. Banner…"

"I asked you to listen, so do it. You're in no position to do otherwise anyway."

Feeling chastised, I released a calming breath and held his gaze.

"I'm aware you have a serious and complicated relationship history. Finding something or someone that can fill that void must be overwhelming and believe me, I'm the first one to know how hard it is. Losing my wife was one of the most painful, if not the most painful event of my life. You can never imagine someone you love so much betraying you and when they do, your whole world fades away. It doesn't mean you have to lose yourself in the process. I did for a while and it is not pleasant."

He stopped and heaved a deep sigh, pressing his hands together, bracing himself for the next part.

"Losing the one you loved mustn't have been easy, Bella. I don't know if it was a sort of revenge for you or a way to fight against emptiness but what you did is still incredibly wrong."

I cleared my throat. Tears were threatening to roll on my cheeks but I resisted and didn't let them fall. I needed strength for this.

"Sir, if you're finished, may I say something?"

"I know that I have disappointed you, and for that I am truly very sorry. You've always been very nice to me and I really think you're a good boss."

He managed a weak smile after my praise. Then, he nodded, signaling me to continue.

"What you said could perfectly explain the situation, but the truth, sir is…that's not true. At least, not for me." I was truly shocked at the controlled quality of my voice.

"What do you mean?"

"My relationship was a failure. We were not meant for each other and, even though it's embarrassing to say this, I wasn't in my love with my ex-boyfriend. Not the way I should have been. So, you see…" I gulped, dreading his reaction to what I was going to say. "You see, I wasn't trying to fill the void. I just met the love of my life."

He snorted. His eyes rolled so far I started to think he was about to faint.

"Can you hear yourself? He's nothing more than a child, Bella! Are you blind? Or just completely irresponsible?"

"It appears to be so, sir. Look, there's nothing more to say. You and I will never agree. Just know it wasn't easy and that was not something I decided to do on a whim or to feel better about myself. It was just…inevitable."

"Yes, this is all very nice but we still have a real problem here. Do you realize the seriousness of your situation? If this whole thing came to Mrs. Cullen's ears, it would be a complete disaster. For you and the school."

"You mean you haven't said anything to her?"

"I thought we had established that I liked you. Do you really think I could have done that to you? But, Bella…" He sighed.

"I know, I know. You have to fire me, don't you?" It was surprisingly easy to say the words.

"That's what I should do, yes. My problem is this: on what grounds? If I said the truth, it would jeopardize your whole future and you would have a hard time finding another job."

The kindness of this man never ceased to surprise me. I silently thanked him with a smile.

"So, what should I do then?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"You have to resign."

I left Banner's office, still shocked but feeling a million times lighter. He knew and the world hadn't crumbled around me. Instead, he had helped me making the biggest decision of my life. Leaving a job I was tired of and making a fresh start.

When I entered the house, all quiet and empty, my sudden enthusiasm completely vanished and gave way to an underlying sadness and a terrifying realization. I had no more reasons to see Edward. If I wanted to keep things secret for my sake and his, I could never speak to him again, never meet him apart from the occasional encounter at the supermarket. Maybe I could catch sight of him briefly tomorrow at school where I was supposed to pick up my stuff. And then, that'd be it.

I would lose him. This time, there was nothing I could do to stop my tears.

Please review, I'd love to know what you think. Trust me when I say it wasn't easy to write…