A/N: Here is chapter 21 - Remember I speak Spanish, so I'm sorry for the mistakes this might have. Would you COMMENT BACK please?
Enjoy!
Chapter 21
The next day I woke up startled. Pictures of the date with Jasper would appear at every single minute of my sleep… and most of all, the feeling when I kissed him and it wasn't him who I felt.
That was seriously freaking me out. I was making my best not to think about it though, but even when I was still in my bed biting my tongue with violence, my mind only seemed to be able to reproduce that scene in my head. Those lips that weren't his…
It was going to rain today, I could see that for the clouds that were formed up in the sky. Good for that, I wasn't in the mood for seeing the sun today. I was feeling weird, and strange, and completely out of place. As if I wanted to escape some hours from the earth and fly to the moon… Forgetting any worry, anything that would make me upset. And then coming back with a huge grin in my face and enjoy Jasper as he deserved, and I deserved.
But I couldn't escape to the moon, and I couldn't forget everything - no matter how much I wanted to. I stared to the window for some seconds, immensely concentrated in every little thing from outside. I was going to predict the rain; to see how everything changed until the first drop would pour.
Because nature is the most complex and at the same time simple thing I was sure that existed. Everything had it precise time and precise method, every tiny thing with the other was connected in some strange way… So complex, and yet so simple. Like the rain washing everything with its presence, the plants opening in proportions human would never notice to reach more water. Everything was perfect, everything was complex, everything was simple.
I felt like nature today. There was this complex and yet simple thing going inside me, but nature is patient… Nature waits to the right moment. And so would I. Just wait and see if it was the butter effect what I was feeling. Wait and see. Because in the end, time is the only wise thing on this earth. Time is the only one who truly knows.
And there it poured – the first drop.
After my philosophical moment of the day I decided it was time to get out of my bed. I had a nice, warm, long shower. Making my best for the water to reach every tensed muscle of my body. And then I did what I'd do almost every day that rained, my passion, the one thing I would never get tired of – I read.
Romeo and Juliet were here with me for the 18th time. Always showing me something new, something different of their relationship. I knew Romeo was just a character, but… that love is enviable. Something that would never stop, something that would always be even when death came in the way.
Unconsciously I started to remember about yesterday night, when Edward called me to ask his so relevant question. Come on! Who didn't know they both died in the end?! I was sure he did!
And then I started to laugh… I knew I was going crazy but I didn't care. Just picturing Edward in front of the TV with wide eyes as he thought of the answer to the question was just too hilarious. I could just picture him frowning and completely mad with himself because he didn't remember it in the moment he needed to. As he would always say,
'It's frustrating; when you don't need something you just remember it like if it was your name. And when you need it more than anything, you forget it like the 8 multiplication table.'
I cracked up laughing remembering the time we dressed like hippies, then him dressed like a chicken when I wanted to stop the chicken kill, then the time he almost killed a Chihuahua… He was unbelievable. Amazing.
"For never was a story of more woe
Than this of Juliet and her Romeo."
With the final lines I started crying, as always. After eating, I decided it was time to clean the house a little bit – it was summer and I truly didn't do it everyday. Sue me! Who cleaned in summer, anyway?
I went to take the garbage outside and remembered to check the mail. And Oh My God, there was a letter there… A letter that I'd been expecting for a really long time.
I took a deep breath and walked slowly to the house again with the letter in hands. It was raining a bit, but I needed these relaxing drops over my body, I was too nervous. I entered to my house quietly and placed the letter in the table.
Without even planning to, I started walking in circles around the table – too nervous to open it, just chewing my tongue in a completely new way. I walked around for more than my legs could resist, but I couldn't sit down either – not with that piece of paper in front of my eyes.
So I just did what I would have done in first place – trying to leave on a distant side what happened yesterday night, trying to forget the unforgettable.
"Edward?" I gasped from my cell phone.
"Bell? Why aren't you calling me to my house?"
"Because I'm too nervous to take my eyes off it." I choked, staring at the piece of paper as if of that would depend my life.
"It?"
"A letter from Dartmouth just arrived." I chewed my tongue one more time.
"Jeez, they are fast. Mine arrived today too. Don't know why I agreed to do it, though. You know I'm not going anywhere…"
"Did you open it?" Now my heart started to beat faster.
I heard Edward sigh from the other side. "Nope, I'm a chicken."
I laughed. "Don't worry, I'm a chicken too." I sighed deeply and stared one more time at it. At least I was now sitting in a chair. "Should we open it at the same time?"
"Why don't you come and we open them here? Alice was going to call you anyway,"
I could picture Alice already freaking out. And I truly wanted to be there for her in her first date. Besides I didn't have anything to do, and being alone when I'd open the letter wasn't the best thing considering my lunatic state and all.
"Sure, why not? See you in '20!" I was already standing, the letter on one hand my raincoat on the other.
"You want me to go and pick you up? I mean, it's seriously raining now and… well," He sighed. "Your truck is a bit old, you know?"
I snorted. "Edwin, I can really take care of myself, thank you very much." Psst, my truck, OLD? Psst!
"'Kay, just asking. Be careful." And then the line was dead.
I put my raincoat in a rush and stormed through the door. I was covering the letter as if it was my little baby, protecting it from any possible danger. Like rain.
The truck roared to life and within seconds I was already in the roadway that would lead me to the Cullens'. I drove with caution, just to please Edward.
The letter was beside me in the passenger's seat; it seemed as if it was staring at me.
"WHAT?" I shouted to it with eyes wide open. And then shook my head violently as I realized I was talking to a piece of paper. That butter was damn powerful!
I sighed in relief as I was already entering the Cullens' house. Not after staring in awe to its perfect architecture. The beauty this house had in every inch of it was shown even more with the little drops on it.
"Let's do it," I gasped with the letter in hand when Edward opened the door.
He had one eyebrow arched and a mischievous smile on his unique face. "Never seen you like this."
"Never received a letter from Dartmouth before," I sighed and ran to the living room. I heard his steps following right behind.
"Where is everyone?" I asked as I realized the house was too quite.
"My mom went to see my dad because he'd a free hour, Alice is already having a shower, and Emmett… well he should be somewhere playing in the mud." He chuckled and went to seat beside me in the floor next to the coffee table.
I suddenly stared at his clothes. "Hey, did you notice we are dressed in the same colors?" I frowned. We both had blue jeans and grey t-shirts. Well, they were different but… they were both grey!
He sighed teasingly. "I always knew you copy me."
"How would I have possibly copy you today if I didn't know what were you going to wear?" I patted his shoulder in a teasing way.
"You already know one of my favorite colors is grey." He said matter of factually and stared at me with childish eyes.
"I thought your favorite color was blue," I said truthfully. I remembered well he always said that.
"Umm, no," He frowned. "That's my favorite color for you. I love how blue looks on you."
"Oh," I said and stared at the letter. Just there a brief image of yesterday night shook my brain and I shook it violently to see if that would make it end.
"You okay?" Edward asked grabbing my shoulder. He seemed worried. "Why are you shaking like that?"
Oops. I sure looked like the loca I was in that moment. "Umm, it's just this new ritual I saw some days ago on TV. When you want something to go well you shook your head from side to side in a desperate way." I lied and prayed for it to be something believable.
"Huh," His eyes seem thoughtful for a second. "Let's do it so." And then he started.
His head was going from side to side as if he suddenly was the Tasmanian Devil. I needed to bite my tongue really hard not to laugh, it was just too hilarious.
Minutes later he ended his whacko party. "It's really good! I can feel everything is going to be fine in my veins." He laughed.
And I thought I was the crazy one here! "Oh, you do?" I bit my tongue one more time.
"Yeah, let's open it!" He shouted, too excited. And I gulped. I was seriously scared. Though on one side it didn't matter if I was accepted because I didn't have enough money saved and I sure didn't want to ask Charlie the rest. On the other one, I was so dying to get accepted. To prove myself of how much I was capable of. Something Edward had always told me.
"You ready?" He said as he stared into my eyes. His eyes trying to comfort me. But I was frozen, I couldn't move. "Hey Bell, don't worry… Everything's gonna be fine. I can feel it. It doesn't matter what this letter says, you know you are going to rock anyway." He smiled at me and placed a hand on my shoulder – the other one had my letter.
He was right. I didn't need a letter to tell me who I was, I already knew. I nodded slowly and took the letter from his hands.
"One, two, three," He called and we both shred the paper. And I opened it…
I shouted with happiness. My eyes closed, my mouth arched in a huge grin. I was in. I WAS IN!
I turned to look at Edward with relieved eyes. "I can't believe it, I've been accepted, E. I've been accepted!" I almost cried.
He smiled brightly. "I knew you would, you are just too good. Everyone wants you in their place." He chuckled.
I punch him lightly in the arm and smiled. "So what about you?"
His eyes were suddenly sad. Oh, no. "I… HAVE BEEN ACCEPTED!" He grinned.
Irrationally I jumped to his lap and took him in a big hug. I was just too happy, even though he now said he didn't want to go, and even though I didn't have all the money I needed; WE HAD BEEN ACCEPTED TO DARTMOUTH, TOGETHER!
"Oh, I can't believe it!" I cheered as I placed my head on his shoulder. "Edward! Can you believe it?"
But he stayed quite, his head in my own bare shoulder. I could only hear his breathing going just a bit faster than usual. I took the time to smell his calming smell from his bare neck, but somehow this time didn't calm me down. On the contrary, it gave something really weird, something I'd never experienced in the tip of my stomach.
I jumped back when my masochistic brain recreated one more time the scene of last night I was trying so hard to suppress. My cheeks suddenly blushed, my legs suddenly shaking.
"Wh-what's wrong?" He asked with a husky voice. His eyes disoriented.
I gulped hard. "Umm, nothing… My legs went numb." I lied, staring to anywhere but his suspicious eyes.
"That's happening a lot to you lately, isn't it?" His voice came in a suspicious way too. And something that I'd always loved in him that was how much of a perceptive person he was - was right now something I hated.
I shrugged and changed topic quickly. "So, what are you going to do?" I pointed to the letter.
"You already know I'm not going, but it was nice to know they want me there." He smiled and dropped his eyes to the letter. I could see in them the hidden sadness, how much he really wanted to go and wouldn't show it. "And what about you?"
"I don't know, I think I won't be able to go to this one either, I still don't have enough money." I shrugged. I could always wait for the other applications from the universities that weren't that famous so they were cheaper. Though I would have loved to go to Dartmouth, it was something that my mother had always wanted for me. But well, you couldn't have everything you wanted in life. That only happened in fairy tales, and I sure I wasn't living one.
Edward looked at me in disbelief and crossed his arms through his chest. "Bella, don't be silly. You know I can give you that money."
"No, no, no," I was talking faster than I could, but I wanted to make my point very clear and fast. "That's not happening Edward, you know I would never let that happen."
"Why not? My father would be more than pleased, you know how much he loves you." He complained, his eyes deep on mine.
"Just because, Edward! I'm not going to ask your family for money, it's not right. After everything they have done for me, you expect me to also ask them money?" They had always been so nice with me when I needed it, I couldn't ask for anything else. No way.
He laughed once. "Bella, you know you've given them a lot back, right?"
"Like what?"
He came closer to me. "First of all the fact that you make their son happy, truly happy. And that he wouldn't be if you didn't exist or were here." He grinned at me, his words making me blush.
I smiled timidly. "You know that's nothing to do with them, I'm with you because you make me happy too. I'm selfish. But that has nothing to do with you giving me money."
He sighed loudly. "Alright, let's just not discuss this right now, okay? We still have like a month." Only a month? We were today on July, 31st. Wow, time passed fast.
I nodded eagerly. I so didn't want to discuss this now either; I just wanted to think of my acceptance – only knowing that made me happy, no matter what'd happen then.
Just then we heard a scream from Alice. Less than a fraction of a second later I could see Edward already running up the stairs. I followed right behind – my heart in my mouth.
"Alice, what is it?" Edward shouted opening the door with a fast movement. I was fearing the worst.
But no. There she was, all dressed and pretty, and looking herself in the mirror with horror in her eyes.
"I have a pimple!" She pouted.
Edward sighed in relief and glared at her with killing eyes. "You can't do that, Alice!"
"Do what?" She frowned.
"Screaming as if someone was killing you when the only thing that is happening is that you have a pimple!"
She fumed at him with dark eyes. "The only thing, Edward? Can you see the size of it?" She said, pointing to a little spot in her nose.
Edward rolled his eyes and turned around to face me, waving his arms at each side of him in frustration. "Can you deal with this, please? My male hormones prohibit me to discuss how large a pimple is." He grumbled and walked to the wall next to the door. I saw him staring at Alice in disbelief and crossing his arms across his chest.
I sighed heavily and after shooting him a dead look I went to meet Alice's pimple. Maybe we could even name it. Mr. Dean the pimple.
"Bella!" Alice cried to me. "What am I going to do?! I can't go out with this thing in my face!" She crossed her eyes so she could stare at it. And I just laughed.
"What are you laughing at?!" Now I was afraid. Her face wasn't anything nice.
"S-sorry, I-I'm n-not l-laughing," I tried to say between guffaws.
"Oh yeah? And what is what you are doing, inventing a new language?" She fumed- her eyes looked like a lethal sore directly to mine.
I breathed deeply and made my best to compose myself. "You are right, sorry. Laugh is vanished, now let's start working."
"What do you mean?" She scowled.
I sighed and shook my head. "Alice, Alice… weren't you the Queen of Fashion?"
"Yes, but what does that have to do with this?!" She pointed one more time to our new little/not so little friend Mr. Dean.
I grinned smugly and took some make up from her dressing table. "That we can make it invisible."
She grinned in response. Her arms already going up and down. Good, we had our happy Alice again.
"You are a genius, Edward, your best friend is a genius!" She sang and took the foundation from my hands with an eager movement.
I placed myself beside Edward in the wall. A smug smile pasted to my face. "See, today I'm the genius." I stack my tongue at him.
He sighed and shook his head. "I always knew you were a genius, genius. That's why you are my friend." He chuckled.
I punched him hard on his big arm. "Shut up, you jerk." And then we waited quietly as we saw Alice covering Mr. Dean.
When it was almost the hour of Alice's date, we were already down stairs. All the family was present now, all staring at Alice. Esme with awe, I could see how proud she was of her daughter as looked at her with melted eyes. Carlisle in a torn way, I could feel his inside debate, he was surely pondering whether if he should be happy for his daughter or scared of what might happen. Emmett was just Emmett, his usual big grin pasted in his face, but some feeling of older brother was invading his big features too.
And Edward? Do I even have to say it? His face was a poem. His fists clenched and his features rigid, cold. I knew him too much to know he was making his best to restrain himself and not go running behind Alice, begging her to stay home.
"Let me take a picture!" Esme sang with a little digital camera on her hands. "Oh my! My baby's first date! This is so exciting!" She cried as flashes sparkled at every millisecond.
"Mom, you are making me blush!" Alice complained giggling. I stared at her with half hearted eyes; the five-year-old little girl I once knew, was now a beautiful young woman. Her eyes were sparkling as she stared at the camera with a huge grin. She looked so beautiful with a violet dress, almost like a model.
The bell suddenly sounded, making all of us jump.
"I'll go open," Esme cheered; her face happy.
I rushed to Alice's side and tried to calm her down with my hand on her shoulder. She was breathing in and out in a therapeutic way, her cheeks a bit blushed.
She suddenly stared at her family with focus eyes. "Could you act human, please?"
Edward snorted. "What are we?"
"You, I don't know. Please behave." She pleaded to her brother and made a face to me. I knew that was my cue to go restrain him. Casually I left Alice's side and sat beside Edward in the big sofa of the living room.
"Come in, Alec." We heard Esme cheering and immediately we all faced to the door.
The smile in Alice's face as she stared at her love entering through the door was breathtaking. Alec grinned back, impatiently.
"Hello, Alec. I'm Carlisle, Alice's father." Carlisle welcomed with a polite voice and waited for Alec to shake his hand.
Alec shook it and grinned. He seemed shy. "I know, doc. Thanks for letting me go out with Alice." He said gently. Wow, he was really nice. I didn't know that. He then waved his hand to us and greeted up in the same polite way.
I heard Edward grouch at my side and tense a bit more. Instantly I took his hand and squeezed it. "Behave," I muttered to him with a low voice. He rolled his eyes and softened his posture a little bit. Not entirely, though.
"Alice, let's go?" Alec went to Alice side and gave her another nice smile. She nodded eagerly in response.
"I'll bring her back at eleven." He said to Carlisle, his voice respectful.
Carlisle nodded in a gentle way. "Have fun." And before anyone could say anything else, they were already turning to the door.
"Hey!" Edward called to them, jumping to his feet. They both turned around, Alec features showed scare. Alice's on the other hand… well; let's say her face didn't show anything nice. "Take care of her, okay, Alec?" He muttered that poor boy's name with disgust.
"Sure," He gulped back and they disappeared through the door.
Edward stayed frozen, facing the door. Even though I was behind him, I could feel his torn features, his sad eyes.
His father put an arm on his shoulder. "Son, don't worry. Everything is going to be alright. I know you do it because you love her, but though it is hard, we have to let her fly." Carlisle showed his wisdom with every word spoken. Edward nodded once and went to sit by my side again, completely mute.
"Your mother and I have a dinner now; it's from someone from work. You are invited if you want; of course you are too, Bella." Carlisle smiled at me. Esme and Carlisle were both putting on their jackets as he spoke.
Edward shook his head. "Nah, I want to be here just in case. And besides, is it that old woman going?" He winked at me.
"What old woman?" Esme asked, frowning.
"That one with the Chihuahua."
"I think she is," Carlisle replied, his eyes puzzled. "Why?"
Edward and I both laughed. "Nothing, nothing," He said and sighed.
"Alright," Carlisle looked at us as if we were crazy - that we all knew we were. "Emmett, do you want to come?"
Emmett eyes got lost for some seconds in some trail of thought. "Free food? Hell yeah!" He shouted with a grin and went to grab his jacket almost running. God, he sometimes could be a child.
We all laughed in response and after a 'Goodbye,' they were already outside the house.
The quietness invaded the room once again and after some minutes of being splashed in the sofa, Edward sighed.
"So… a movie?" He suggested arching an eyebrow invitingly. I nodded with a grin, I loved movies' night.
"What do you have in mind?"
"A horror movie," He said faking a dark voice. "Muahaha."
I gulped. "What horror movie?"
He grinned mischievously. "I know what you did last summer." He said with that same voice.
I shook my head violently. "NO! It scares me!"
He rolled his eyes at me. "Oh, come on Bell! We are older now! Promise I won't let anything bad happen to you."
I glared at him. "Last time you said that, I ended up all covered in mud."
He chuckled once. "But that was because it was too funny, and nothing bad happened to you, anyway. Come on, Bell," He looked at me with puppy eyes. God, I hated those. "Please?"
I sighed loudly. Jeez, he was such a child sometimes! "Alright, alright, bring it on!"
He grinned and went to put the movie on the big plasma television. God, if I'd hated to see it in my tiny TV… I couldn't imagine how much I would in this one.
In the scariest parts I screamed and clutched my hands to Edward's back. I'd hide between him and the sofa until he'd tell me the scene was over. I must have seen twenty minutes of the entire movie – the first twenty ones.
"My back is aching, you know?" Edward sighed heavily when the credits were already showing.
"Well, you deserved that! I've been at the edge of a heart attack the whole time!" I complained, crossing my arms through my chest. What he didn't know was that the heart attack was already my friend, considering all the times I'd been being at the edge of it in this short period of time.
"Sorry, I just love seeing your scared face. It's too funny." He smiled his Colgate smile.
"Ha ha," I muttered and sighed heavily. "So you behave pretty well tonight, huh?"
"Don't even say it." He muttered and stared at the front.
"You think they are kissing right now?" I giggled childishly.
He froze in his place and glared at me.
"Oh, I'm sorry, I was kidding!" I laughed, putting my hand in my mouth in an 'oops' way.
He shook his head, annoyed and placed his head on the sofa to stare at the ceiling.
We stayed like that for some seconds until he sighed again. "So how was your date with Hale?" He asked; his eyes still in the ceiling.
I gulped heavily. Why did he have to bring the subject?! "Umm, okay," I muttered back and stared to my hands. My teeth found in a second my tongue.
"Okay?" I could feel his eyes now posed on me.
"Yeah, it was fine." I muttered again.
"Can't you give me any more detail?" His voice came more impatient.
"What do you want to know?" THAT I THOUGHT OF YOU WHEN I WAS KISSING HIM?!
"I don't know! Something… like… I don't know, Bella. Just something more…" It looked as if he wanted to ask something and he didn't find the words – or as if he had found them but knew he couldn't ask it.
"Well, what I can tell you is that we were spending a nice time when someone interrupted us!" Now I looked at him, my eyes accusing.
"Oh," He grinned in an apologetic way. "Sorry, that game was kind of… wow!" He widened his eyes.
I frowned. "Kind of wow?"
He nodded with wide eyes, his stare meeting anywhere but me. "Yeah, like wow, like seriously… wow!"
Alright; what did he freaking mean with 'wow'?!
"Even if the game was wow or not wow, whatever that means, you did know who gets killed in the end of Romeo and Juliet." I stared at him deeply in the eyes so he couldn't escape the state. He seemed nervous, strange.
"I-I didn't remember, Bella. Jeez! You because you read it a thousand times but I don't have to remember." He said angrily.
I sighed. "Whatever, Edward, I just didn't interrupt you when you were with Jessicas—a."
His eyes went suddenly dark when I said this. "So what did I interrupt? What would have happened if I wouldn't have called, huh?" His voice came stronger, so did his stare.
And I blushed. "Nothing Edward, the same things that happen in dates."
"Like kissing?" He mumbled.
And of course he had to say it. Of course my brain gave me a flashback of when I was in Jasper's leather sofa and it wasn't him I was feeling.
I blushed violently and my legs shook involuntarily. "I guess." I didn't know how he understood me, because I couldn't even hear my own sound.
"So you did kiss him?"
"What do you care, Edward?! It's my business!" I snapped at him. My eyes furious.
His eyes widened in response of my tough action and some kind of pain appeared on their deepness. "Because I care about you, Bella! Jeez, I thought you trusted me."
"I do, I trust you! But what do you want to know?! Yeah I kissed him, big deal! Would you like to tell me how you f*c*ed JessicASS?!" My own eyes flickered with my words that came off me without any warn. I was as shocked as Edward seemed to be, his mouth hanging open. Besides, I hated the F word.
He was going to tell me something, his eyes suddenly hurt. But when he opened his mouth to talk, my cell phone rang. He sighed loudly in response and punched the sofa with strength.
I took in with shaky hands. "Hello?" I snapped to my cell phone, not even bothering to look to the ID caller.
"B-Bella, is Alice. P-please don't say it's me!" Alice said with her voice faltering. It seemed as if she was crying – crying like hell.
