Here is the next chap. Part 1, as I promised. I hope you like it. Thank you for your comments, I really appreciate it. Enjoy!

Chapter 28 (Part 1)

I was already thinking of everything I would say to him. First I would slap him strongly on the face. Yes, he deserved that. I would tell him how mad I was at him for not answering my message, for not coming to say goodbye. And third, when I would be sure no one was around, I would take his face in my hands and kiss him softly on the lips.

My stomach twisted as we were reaching the mansion. I was already biting my nails, hearing the possible explanation of why he did all this in my head. Because he was scared, as Jasper said… but he would fight today, I knew that. He would ask me to stay.

"We're almost there, little girl." Charlie sighed, happy.

"Yep," I breathed, my stomach twisting once again.

"What are you going to tell him?"

"Everything. Just everything."

Before my stomach could twist again, we were already there.

"I'll wait here." He smiled, encouraging me.

I nodded. After taking a deep breath I got out of the car. My legs for once determined to not give me to the ground and to let me fulfill my wish. I walked fast to the entry, almost ran.

I knocked twice before Esme opened the door. Her eyes sad and worried were talking to me, pleading.

"Oh Bella," she sighed, pulling me into the house with her gentle hand. "I'm so glad you are here!"

"Esme, I need to see Edward." My stomach was twisting again, the words going off my mouth all together. "Please."

She shook her head, her eyes meeting the floor, ashamed. "He—" she trailed off, and met my stare. "He doesn't want to see you, honey. I'm sorry."

And the words came like swords directly into my heart, once again. As if it had never heard it before, it hurt as much as the first time. I tried to put my hands in something rigid, something that wouldn't let me fall. But there was nothing near me. I clutched my feet to the ground. This wouldn't win me. I would go and talk to him.

I closed my eyes and spoke through my gritted teeth. "I'd rather he told me that personally."

She stared back at me in an immense inside debate. It seemed like hours when she spoke, but I knew there had only been seconds.

"All right," she said. "He will hate me, but I think I could live with that."

I nodded to her, thanking her through my eyes. And then my arms went alone to her shoulders and gave her a big hug. "Thank you, Esme. Not only for this but for every day you have been here for me. I could never thank you enough for that." My eyes filled with tears as I remembered all the times she had been the mother I needed and didn't have.

She hugged me more strongly. "You will always belong in here, Bella. Always."

I kissed her cheek and ran to the stairs, my legs trembling, my heart pounding with violence. I didn't stop till I met the shut door of his room. Alice and Emmett didn't seem to be here, but I knew he was.

I thought for some seconds. Should I knock first? Would he answer if I said who I was?
But I couldn't waste any more time. I only had the three steps I had thought in the car present in my mind. First slap, then ask for an explanation, then kiss him.

I turned the bolt, suddenly gaining all the strength in the world, and opened the door. My eyes took some seconds to adjust to the dark place. And it felt so cold, so dead. The curtains were down, his bed remained untouchable. My eyes scanned the room I knew by heart, desperately. Though now it seemed the room of a stranger.

And then they found him. He was crouched in his coach. His eyes were red, his features torn. But he was still so beautiful, so perfect…

Everything I had thought crumbled. Every little reason to yell at him, to be mad at him disappeared when I stared into his emerald green eyes. His eyes widened completely when he realized who was there, waiting in the door.

"Bella…" he breathed deeply. His voice came out distorted for the lack of use.

"Why?"

He stared at my eyes in immense pain, immense misery. And then he lowered them to meet the floor. "I don't know what you mean, Bella." He mumbled, almost unintelligible.

"You don't know what I mean?!" I was almost yelling at him, at least I wanted to. But my voice felt too weak and it wouldn't endure such effort.

"No." He replied robotically, his eyes still glued to the dark mass.

I stared at him incredulous. I wanted to punch him with so much strength right now… but I was too weak for that, too. I leaned against the wall next to my back, afraid that my whole body would crumble if I didn't support on something.

"Who are you and what have you done with my best friend?" My voice was almost as loud as a whisper.

He didn't answer. He went back to the coach where he was before, his movements as robotic as his previous state. And my stomach felt sick.

"What's wrong with you, Edward? What happened?" I pushed again, not giving up. I wasn't going to give up today. I started walking toward him and sat down at his side.

But it seemed as if I were a ghost before him. He didn't change his posture nor did he look at me. "Nothing happened, I'm just tired."

I laughed in disbelief; my voice came out distorted one more time. "Tired?" I shook my head. "So tired that you couldn't come to say goodbye to me?" I had to contain the tears inside my eyes, but it was getting more difficult with every second passing by.

He stayed quiet for a moment before he answered. "I was going to send you an email when you were there."

"An email?" I yelled this time, I found the strength somewhere. "AN EMAIL?"

He didn't even flinch at my tone, his stare was intent in the dark. "Yes. I mean, you were going to be back in some months, anyway, it's not like I would never see you again."

My chest cracked once again, though it already seemed impossible how it could keep cracking. The idea of seeing him again in some months was horrendous, devastated. I wanted to vomit but I was also weak for that. I thought for a moment, desperately, trying to find the one thing that would make him react, that would make him tell me something. And then I remembered.

"Did you see the message I sent you?" I would make him see sense. "Did you? Because I meant every word. Please tell me to stay and I'll stay. I will. I don't care about Dartmouth, I won't be happy there if I know you are here. I came here, today, to tell you that my heart is yours and if I go, it will stay here with you, anyway. Do you want me to die because I'm not near from my heart?"

He was as quiet as before and I was with every second that passed, even more hysteric. "Just please say something, please."

"What do you want me to tell you?" He muttered.

I stared at him, incredulous once again. "That you want me to stay! That I'm not staying in vain, that I'm staying because I think love is the most important part of life, Edward. Because I've finally found my Romeo!"

"I've already told you, Bella, Romeo doesn't exist."

I did the impossible to stop a moan of pain that was threatening to go out of my mouth. "You don't mean anything of this," I tried to breathe, to make my words audible.

He shut his eyes close, I could see that even in the darkness of the place. "I'm sorry, I do."

I tried to breathe again, though it felt as if I were choking. "Did your other words mean anything? Anything at all?" I chewed my tongue, praying silently that my brain wouldn't recreate them again and break me even more.

His answer delayed one more time. He grasped the coach we were in with tightened hands. "I was confused. I thought I felt something…," he breathed deeply, he was speaking through gritted teeth. "But then I realized we were just friends. Best friends."

This time I did moan in pain. The tears that I could once pull back were now unstoppable, determined to get as much of my skin as possible.

"What?" I breathed, broken. "You— don't—love—me?"

"No. I'm sorry, I don't love you in that way."

I stood up from the coach, finding the little strength I still had in some part of me, determined to get out of here. But it was so little, that I ended up falling to the dark floor. My whole body shook with the knock.

In that instant, two warm, too familiar, too amazing hands found me, pulling me up.

"Don't touch me," I muttered, shaking his hand off my arm.

He stared back at my eyes with an expression I couldn't decipher; it was a mix of many feelings. And then, slowly, he let off my arm.

I stayed in the floor for a moment, trying to breathe again. Slowly, I stood up. My whole body was aching, but I wasn't sure if it was because of the fell or because I was too devastated.

He remained standing a couple of feet far from me, his arms folded across his chest, his eyes shining in the dark. I wasn't ready to let go, I wasn't ready to leave him here and walk away.

But I had no other choice, either. He had stated it simple and sure, he didn't love me in that way.

I took a deep breath and stood up, ignoring my trembling legs.

"Can't I hold you, at least?" he gulped heavily when I was already standing. His eyes finding mine with desperation.

My breathing was so uneven because of the crying that it felt as if I had been running the whole day. I stared at his eyes, completely confused. Though I was trying to block the idea in my brain, I needed his touch as much as I needed to breathe.

"I—" I trailed off, unable to speak.

He gave a step toward me, then another one, when his hands had found mine, I spoke again. "I hate you." I cried, shaking my hands off him. I started walking to the door, my body so weak that I thought I wouldn't make it.

When I finally reached it, I looked back at him. I ignored the sorrow in the depth of his emerald green eyes, I knew it could never compare to mine. He didn't need me as much as he needed the air to breathe, he didn't understand what I was enduring.

"And this time, I mean it!" I yelled at his face and slammed the door of his room.

I ran down the stairs, all my body trembling now. The tears were almost choking me, but I didn't care, I just wanted to get out of here. I couldn't let my brain remember everything I had lived here, inside these walls…

While I ran through the steps my unconscious side won and so I gave in to the memories. His laughter, so pure, appeared strongly behind my ears. It seemed as if it was happening right now, but I knew it was only my memory remembering the countless time his contagious laughter had made me happy, cheered my day.

I remembered all the scary movies he had made me see in his living room, in the big plasma. I remembered how little I had seen of all of them, always so comfortable and safe in his shoulder. I remembered how many times he had whipped my tears away, for laughter or for sadness. I remembered the jokes, the times we had cooked awful food, the pranks we had made to Emmett. I remembered the times he had made me practice swimming in his room, showing me how I should put my legs and my arms. And how every time I tried it, he would laugh so hard that I would always end up thinking he had peed on himself.

And then I remembered these past days, this past month that had been so crucial to my existence in this world. That had made it worth it.

When I reached the last step I remembered his last words. They were all coming in immense speed, in the highest volume behind my ears. He didn't love me, not in that way.

I ran to the door, ignoring Esme's eyes filled with tears. I couldn't even stop to hug her for a last time, I was going to die if I continued stepping the floor of this house.

I could only manage to say mumble some words as I passed by her. "Send hugs to Carlisle. Tell him thank you."

I didn't wait for her reply. I ran through the amazing porch and reached the car in impossible speed. I breathed deeply when I was inside, closing my eyes shut not to see my father's worried expression.

"What—"

"Not now, Dad. Please, just… let's go. I have a plane to catch."

Charlie started the car without saying a word. He drove through the roads in complete silence, only listening to my quiet sobs.

Before my mind could recreate any other painful scene, I took my cell phone in my hands and began typing. I didn't know why I felt the need to tell him, but I did it for some reason.

You were wrong, I hadn't found my Romeo. At least he hadn't found his Juliet. See you in a couple of months. And really, thank you for everything. You are nothing like what I had expected the first day I met you in the bonfire. You are really one in a million.

We reached Seattle in more or less the estimated time. Three excruciating hours that had felt like a whole life. I didn't know if I had been able to sleep, but after the first hour, it felt as if I had drowned in an immense darkness.

"We are here," Charlie announced as he pulled over in the parking lot of the airport. The gray concrete seemed to be coordinated with the white sky above us, full of clouds.

A young man that worked in the airport came to help us with the luggage.

"I've got it," Charlie muttered to red hair boy, taking the bags in his hands.

I rolled my eyes at him; he had always thought himself invincible. "Dad, they are a lot. Would you let him help?"

He sighed, defeated. "Fine. But for the record, I could do it by myself."

"Of course," I rolled my eyes one more time at him, and entered the freezing cold airport full of air conditioners.

"Just a little more time, a little more time." I kept repeating to myself as I did the check in.

"Have a nice day," the lady said too polite when she finished.

I sighed heavily. "I surely had the best of alls." I muttered under my breath, but I started walking away before I could see if she had heard it.

Charlie placed his arm in my shoulders as we walked to the departure zone, where we would have to say goodbye. We stopped when we got there, and it felt as if his arm was glued to my shoulders.

"You know what?" he said, his eyes lost in some distant place, some distant time. "When your mother told me she was ill and that you would be living with me soon, she was never afraid. She always knew how strong you were." He smiled half heartedly, remembering. And for some seconds I found myself wishing I could read his thoughts so I could see her smile, perfect behind my eyes.

"But I'm scared," I shrugged, my eyes glistened with tears. "I am not strong."

He took my face in his hands, commanding my eyes to meet his. "To be scared doesn't mean you are not strong," he smiled and took me in a hug. "It just means you are human."

I hugged him strongly, and now the tears spilled and wet his gray T-shirt. "I love you, Dad."

"I love you too, little girl." His voice was faltering toward the end, his chest going up and down unevenly. "Your mother would be so proud of you. So proud."

It felt like just a fraction of a second later when we broke apart. But I took him again in another strong hug before he could say goodbye. I was such a baby.

"Please take care of yourself, Dad." I begged as I definitely let off him. "Please."

"I will," he promised, smiling with his wrinkled eyes. "Now, you take care of yourself, young lady. And you'll see how everything will work out." He winked at me in the end, his tone held such a wisdom that I stared in awe for a moment.

"Bye, Dad." I smiled as I walked to the door. "I'll call you when I get there."

"All right, I'll be waiting for it!" He shouted for me to hear it.

"Dad?" I turned around when I had reached the door, desperately.

"Yes?" He frowned, worried for the urgency of my tone.

"Never let Sue go." I shouted back, almost choking at the end. But it wasn't because of the shout, I knew that.

He smiled. "I won't."

With that, I went to the Passport Control. They were done soon. I took my handbag in my shoulder again and went to find a seat next to my gate.

I sat down and took a deep breath. This was it; I was officially leaving my town with everything that implied and going to College. I chewed my tongue as if that would shut my mind that was threatening to show me what I desperately wouldn't endure.

"Please, please," I hummed to myself, waiting for the time to fly by. My eyes widened when I heard a velvet voice very distant in some place, one too familiar. My eyes started scanning the place in a rush of adrenaline when I stopped abruptly, shaking my head.

I laughed bitterly to myself, I had finally gone crazy. Before I could think anything further, the speakers announced my departure.