A/N: This chapter's a lot of me exorcising my own hatred for little Nessie, well not hatred, just frustration. Miss Clearwater makes me wish Oz and Al hadn't bothered killing Francesca; Leah was just made to go out there and kick any female ass neccessary, male too, but her 'tude deserves a bitchy female to be unleashed on.
When you read this, just picture Leah with a "TEAM JACOB" t-shirt on, 'cos you know that's the way she's inclined.


"The truth doesn't hurt unless it ought to."


Chapter Twenty-Two: Daggers

Leah's words sent a bolt of fear through my body.

I may have had no idea what I'd done, but Leah sure as hell did, and I was guessing, no, I was positive, she'd have no problem in telling me.

She stared at me, before sneering and turning back to face the ocean.

I didn't respond, instead I waited for more as she knocked back another gulp from the bottle, wincing as the liquid scratched down her throat. Leah had never liked me, I think she'd tried, she could just never do it. But right now, dislike wasn't even the word.

Leah Clearwater despised me.

She pushed the cap on the bottle and stuck it between her knees, placing her palms flat against the rock, staring out on the wild ocean.

After her daunting statement, she'd fallen into a pregnant silence. Part of me figured she didn't need words. I knew what was before me was more evidence of the changes around here than words could ever be.

And I thought that was unfair.

Leah Clearwater spinning a half-empty bottle of vodka between her legs and staring out on the ocean like she'd want nothing more to jump into it and never resurface couldn't be my fault, could it?

"You see that cliff over there?" I followed as she quickly lifted her fingers, pointing them towards a steep edge on the land far in the distance. She smirked a little, without it touching her eyes and slapped her hand back down on the rock. "Bella jumped from there once." My eyes darted from the cliff back to Leah, whose gaze was back on the ocean. "It was when the leeches up and left, just after I phased for the first time, the day my Dad died."Leah winced, her fingers curling into a fist against the rock. "Which of course, didn't matter. It wasn't the day Harry Clearwater died; it was the day that precious Isabella Swan almost died. She always said she never meant to kill herself, and I mostly believe her. See, she's just like you." Her dark eyes swept slowly over her shoulder to me. "Selfish. Not giving a damn about what consequences her actions had for other people. Just waiting for someone to rescue her, which of course they always do. Because you little Leech Princesses are so special, right?" She took the bottle again, this time showing no sign of reaction when the liquid stung. "Of course, Jacob saved her."

Ouch.

This pain was like nothing I'd felt for a long time. The quick stab of agony hearing his name caused was reminiscent of what I endured when I first left. Leah noticed me flinch, and smiled wider this time, but from where I stood I could see tears welling up in her eyes. "Good. I'm glad hearing his name hurts you." I took a deep breath and moved to sit beside her, I deserved this. If it helped Leah at all then I would let her verbally punish me as much as she liked. She scoffed in disgust as I placed myself inches away from her, and looked back out onto the ocean.

"What happened?" When I asked that, I was starring at the half-empty bottle Leah was spinning in her hands, I wanted to know what had caused the strong Leah to become such a wreck.

"You mean to Beautiful Bella or Jacob the Joke?" A second stab hit my heart, but I didn't allow myself to flinch. "After Jacob saved her, she ran back off to your precious Daddy. Leaving poor Jakey's heart all trampled on." A look of pure disgust lined her face, as she turned quickly. "You creatures never deserved him. He got his heart broken twice because of you selfish little bloodsuckers, and all he ever did was give you everything he had." I could smell the alcohol on her breath as she leaned over, hissing her words. She turned away, taking a deep breath and another swig from her bottle. A tear rolled down her cheek, leaving a liquid trail which glinted in the moonlight. After what felt like an hours silence I took my turn.

"I'm sorry, Leah." She scoffed and slowly shook her head. "I know what happened to you. I know about Sam." She drove her fist into the rock and threw herself to her feet, the alcohol bottle swinging in her other hand.

"You know nothing! You're just a dumb little kid who doesn't understand anything. Not love, or loyalty or what it feels like to be the one left behind!" Her words had started as shrieks, but her anger crumbled towards then ends and she threw the back of her arm across her eyes, breathing deeply. When the panting stopped she let her arms hang loosely at her sides, and allowed the tears to flow freely down her angry face. "Do you know what I'd have given to be you? Do you know what I'd give to have someone love me as much as Sam loves Emily, as Jake loved you?" The fact she switched between tenses when referring to the two couple did not pass me unnoticed. "And like the selfish little mongrel you are you threw it all away; leaving everyone behind to tear themselves and each other apart." She waved the arm with the bottle in the direction of the house which held the ghost of my Grandfather. "Why did you come back, Renesmee?" I took several short breaths, not sure if my voice would still be working.

"I – I heard about Charlie, I wanted to see him."

"Did you think you'd make it all better? That one little visit would heal the months and months of heartbreak I've watched them go through." Any sane person would have run from this argument by now, but part of me was relishing in the shots of emotion Leah was administering, I was glad I was finally feeling again. "I take it you're not back for good? That the Cullen's aren't all just gonna come together here for some big reunion." I doubted her question was sincere, but I answered anyway.

"No, I'll be leaving soon."

"Yeah, good. You run off to whoever's saving you nowadays. Leave us all alone." I rolled my eyes at the truth behind her words; Still feeling the pull to be safe with Al. Was I so predictable?

"What happened to you, Leah?" She paused, midway through throwing the bottle's contents down her throat.

"I thought you said you knew. That you understood about me and Sam and Emily." She spat the words in a sarcastic mimicry.

"I'm not talking about that. Look at you, you're a mess. This isn't you Leah, you're a fighter. The only female in the pack. The one who doesn't take any crap from anybody." She'd slumped to the ground, wrapping her arms around her knees and sobbing.

"What Pack? I have no pack! I'm alone now. Whenever I phase it's only my voice I hear in my head, nobody else's. Seth's stopped to be with Louise, none of the others will talk to me, and Jacob…." She trailed off, her eyes wandering back over the ocean. My heart clenched, desperate for her to finish that sentence, to share with me the thoughts I could now see working through her. "The only reason I keep phasing is because I'm scared. Because everyone else I know has somebody, and the ones who haven't are just content running around together until they do. But I have nobody, and I refuse to grow old alone." She started weeping again and I crawled to her side, placing my hand slowly across her shoulders. "Why didn't he want me?"

"Who Leah, Sam?"

"No, not Sam! Jake! He came back here after you went, to beg Seth to help him look for you. When Seth said no Jacob tried to go Alpha on his ass. They got in a huge fight, took nearly every wolf on the reservation to tear them apart." Leah ignored my shocked gasps, continuing her sob-drenched story. "Then he left, he didn't even ask me to come with him, which I would have, of course. Then when I phased, he wasn't there." She poked her forehead slowly. "He just left me, like everybody always does." I leaned closer to her, keeping my voice a whisper.

"If I could fix this Leah, fix you. I would" She just scoffed, throwing herself to her feet, hiding the bottle in a bush before wiping her face and walking back to the house.

{--}

I waited a couple of minutes, sat in a numb silence staring across the waves and at the cliff Leah had pointed out to me.

Her words had hardly made sense; apparently there was a lot I didn't know about before I was born.

Hopping to my feet I stared into the bush where Leah had hidden the bottle, and after fishing it out I turned and emptied its stinking contents into the water, screwing the cap on and putting it back where I'd found it.

Leah was better than this. Hopefully she'd figure that out.

{--}

Sue's infectious smile had lost none of its strength on me.

I couldn't help but grin as she did when she took my plate of food away after cupping my cheeks with both her hands and staring deep into my eyes.

"I think you could out-eat my Seth these days, Ness. That boy hardly eats anything anymore." Charlie snickered, pushing his food around the plate,

"He eats plenty, Sue; he's just not in the same league he used to be. Not like his sister." Leah grunted from the other room where the TV was on mute, but she was still sat in front of it, staring mindlessly.

Sue turned from the sink, rubbing a towel over her hands, before dropping back in her seat,

"You must be tired, honey. Would you like to go upstairs and get some sleep?"
"No, I'm fine thanks, Nanna. I got some rest on the way here." Charlie looked up,

"Did you come far, Ness?" Through the doorway I saw Leah twist in her seat, her body facing towards the kitchen a little more.

"Uh, yeah, it was pretty far." Charlie went to speak, but stopped.

"Are you happy, Renesmee?" I'd been staring at Charlie, and the distance in his eyes and when Sue asked her question, I couldn't tear my gaze away from him.

"What?" She reached for my hand, and I turned to her.

"Are you happy? We know what made you leave, about the note and all those things, but they don't matter to me," Charlie's eyes shot up from where they were burning into the table, and from the sound Leah made in the living room, I could tell neither of them shared completely in Sue's opinion. "But are you happy, are you safe?" I stared at my Grandfather, and had no idea what answer might hurt him the most. I felt the prospect of tears rising up in me and swallowed them back. Sue had always given Seth and Leah independence; she was just always there when they needed to come back. But Charlie was different, he couldn't do that. And it wasn't Sue's daughter I'd left behind.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine."

{--}

I watched Charlie as he sat in silence and forced smiles as Sue kept talking.

She told me about Seth, and how well he was doing. She told me about Billy, about Paul and Rachel's new baby, and how little Claire had been picked to play Cinderella in the school play.

At this, my phone started to vibrate in my back pocket.

Sue didn't seem to notice, she just continued going into details about Claire's play.

"And Quil's run the lines with her so many times he could get up there and perform the whole thing solo. You gonna get that?" Leah had appeared in the doorway, her arms folded as she stared at me and nodded down towards my legs. I shook my head and she smirked, shaking her head before returning to a scowl. Sue's eyes travelled between us, having missed the sound Leah had picked up and not knowing what was going on.

The vibrating stopped and Leah hung in the doorway.

Her hands dropped to her sides and she turned to the open window, pulling in a deep breath.

When she turned back her eyes had a fiery anger and he body rocketed into me, grabbing me by the shoulders and pinning me back against the wall.

"Who's with you?" As her daughter shouted, Sue shrieked and Charlie got up from his seat.

I didn't think, I just reacted.

Grabbing Leah's arms I pulled them to the sides and threw her backwards. She flew across the room, crashing against the other wall which cracked around her.

She picked herself up, we were both shaking, and as I tried to control mine, I knew she couldn't.

Pushing her wild black hair from her face, Leah snarled before racing out the front door, the familiar crack audible as her body changed.

I looked down at my hands, then up at the place where Leah's body had buckled the kitchen wall.

Sue and Charlie were silent.

Sue's jaw was wide open and her eyes wide.

If she looked shocked, then Charlie was just terrified.

It hurt so much to see him look at me the way he did. I wasn't his little girl anymore.

I felt the tears coming back, and knew it was time to go.

"I'm so sorry - I didn't mean - I shouldn't have….." Sue grabbed my hand,

"Don't worry. A little DIY will do Charlie good, right Charlie?" He was silent, silent and scared.

"I have to go." I hugged Sue quickly as tears filled her eyes, then moved cautiously over to Charlie, wrapping my arms around his neck and whispering,

"I love you. And I'm sorry. For everything, I'm so sorry."

{--}

I ran from the house, pulling my phone from my pocket as I chased Leah.

One New Voicemail.

Calling my inbox I pressed the phone to my ear and pushed at my feet to carry me faster when Al's frantic voice came over the speaker,

"Smee, there are wolves here, okay wolves! Why aren't you answering your phone? I'm coming to get you, I don't like this. Please, Smee, just come back to me, please!" The message beeped out and I dropped my hand from my ear, trying not to crush the little phone as my fingers pulsed with the rhythm of my feet.

I had to find Al before Leah did.

And then I'd need to explain the wolves.

Today was fast becoming a contender for the worst day of my life.