Made a change at the end of the last chapter which you should probably check out; Read and Review :) thanks!
S.E. Hinton owns The Outsiders.
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Paula collapsed against the rickety children's play equipment and tried to pull herself together long enough to put the pieces together in her head.
But even as she tried to think things through she couldn't focus on one single thing. The man that she had thought to be her father her entire life was not actually her father? Her siblings shared the same father, but she didn't? Was she the reason he left their family behind? Rick was just drunk. Maybe he was just being an asshole. Paula angrily brushed away a few stray tears.
As the night deepened farther into darkness Paula sat with her arms wrapped around her body. Time passed, although she had no idea how much, since she had run out of the house, and all she wished was for Sam to hurry up and get there with the drugs. She needed it more than ever. She wanted to erase the images that were invading her mind, the images that were making her sick to her stomach.
The crunch of gravel in front of Paula's caused her body to immediately tense, and it took all the courage she had inside of her to look up to see who it was.
"You alright?"
All the air in Paula's body left in what felt like one big whoosh. It was Sam. Not Rick, Sam.
"Mhmm," was her response. She silently wished he'd just pull out the weed. But he didn't, instead he grabbed hold of her two arms and pulled her to standing position.
"You don't look it," he said quietly.
Paula met his eyes briefly, long enough to realize that they were actually filled with concern. That's when she lost it again. Hell, she was surprised that she actually had that many tears in her body, but she did. She had a whole heap of them.
Sam brought her into his embrace and Paula took it right away. She let her body be held up by someone else for a change. But she was embarrassed nonetheless. She was crying like a baby in front of someone she barely knew. But as soon as he brought her in, he pulled her away.
"Maybe I should take ya to your brother? I just seen 'em not too long ago down-"
"No-no-no," between gulps of air Paula shook her heard quickly. Her heart rate sped up at the thought of telling her brother's what had just occurred.
"Are you sure? I could drop you off down the street- they wouldn't even see me," he tried again.
It wasn't even the fact that they might see her with Sam. That was truly the last thing on her mind. The thing was, if she had been the reason for her own sibling's dad to desert them then she sure as hell wasn't going to repeat history. Whenever Rick went on a rampage about supporting the family, she knew he was right. He did support the family. Her mother hardly brought in a pay check, and neither Tim nor Curly had worked an honest day in their lives. Sure she would love to see Tim beat the every loving shit out of Rick but,
No, she wouldn't be the one to destroy her family again.
Instead of Sam pulling her over to his car, like she thought he'd been about to do he sat down and pulled her down next to him. He wrapped one arm around her and let her cry against him.
Paula felt stupid, but there was no denying that Sam was pretty comforting at the moment. So comforting that she forgot all about the weed she had so desperately needed.
XXX
"Are you goin' share what had you so worked up?"
It was a simple enough request. If Paula were honest with herself, he deserved to at least get an answer. He did, after all, spend the early morning sitting in the park with her and now he was driving her back to her house. But Paula couldn't quite bring herself to let the words out of her mouth.
"I- don't want to talk to about it," Paula answered quietly, her eyes watching the house fly by out her window.
"Well I figure you should tell someone – you were awfully upset,"
Paula couldn't help herself and she snorted in his direction.
"Yeah thanks, I'll get right on that,"
"Well I see whatever it is it didn't spoil your lovely attitude," Sam retorted. His patients must be weaning.
The houses began to become more familiar as Sam pulled up in front of her own residence. It was six in the morning and although the sun was already shining Paula prayed that all her family members would be sleeping. Including Rick.
Paula shuddered. She wasn't so sure she even wanted to go back into the house, but it was far too early to go to the Curtis'. Darry was freakily perceptive and he'd know something was up for sure.
About to open the door, something struck Paula as weird.
"How did you know I lived here?" Paula asked looking to the driver's seat.
"Cause I spend my days stalkin' you everywhere you go and I noticed that you spend the majority of your time at this residence," Sam had an eyebrow cocked and was smirking. Paula sighed at his immaturity. "This also happens to be the home of Tim Shepard, who happens to be a gang leader that me and my buddies are well aware of."
Paula immediately felt stupid. Of course he would know where her brother lived.
"Oh right. Well, thanks for the ride. And thanks for staying out there with me, you didn't have too," Paula muttered quietly. "You probably shouldn't have."
"You're probably right about that," Sam shook his head slightly. "Your brother don't look none to happy."
It took Paula a few seconds to register what he had said but when she did her heart all but fell to the bottom of her stomach.
"Shit!"
He was standing on the porch staring right into Sam's car and she could tell that his eyes were blazing.
"Shit. Shit. Shit." Paula felt frozen in her seat.
"My sentiments exactly," Sam wasn't looking at her, but right passed her, locking eyes with her brother.
Still, Paula didn't move. Her brother was going to kill her. Honest to god kill her. This looked wrong on so many levels; he would never believe her.
"Are ya goin'..go?" Sam finally brought his eyes to hers and he seemed uncomfortable.
"Suddenly I'm not quite in a hurry to get home," Paula thought aloud, looking away from her brother's gaze.
Without any warning Sam shifted into gear and took off down the road. Paula sucked in air. Tim seeing them together wasn't a good situation, and taking off with Sam was probably even worse. But at the moment Paula was okay with taking the easy way out and leaving her brother standing on the porch.
"Where you want to go?" Sam asked, keeping his eyes trained on the road ahead.
"Somewhere where no one else is going to see us would be a good start," Paula retorted quietly.
So there she was on her way to god knows where with her drug dealer, her brother's enemy; a boy that she barely knew. It probably wasn't her brightest idea.
XXX
A few minutes later and Paula was seated in a dingy booth in some diner on the edge of town of which she did not even know the name. She'd run into the building so quickly she hadn't even registered where exactly she was.
Sitting in the seat across from Sam, Paula was unusually silent. Instead she stuffed her mouth with the pancakes and a chocolate shake had just bought for her.
"So you want to talk about it now," Sam questioned, not overly pushy, just friendly. Paula figured if she owed him an explanation before, he definitely deserved one now. He would be sure to feel the wrath of her brother in no time.
"Not really," but she would.
"My idiot step-father came home last night when no one was home but my mama. She was passed out though," Paula rattled off, "He was just being his normal asshole self and then he opened his mouth."
Paula ducked her head a little. It felt kind of weird to be talking about her family like that, even if they were unbelievably dysfunctional. Sam looked at her quietly, waiting for her to continue. She did.
"He basically called my mom a slut and said that I had a different father than everyone else in my family," Paula sighed. Saying it out loud made it all too disgustingly real. Paula sucked on her straw and it made a slurping noise signalling its emptiness. Sighing again Paula pushed it away and looked out the window to the passing cars. It was still early and everyone was off to work. It was probably less than an hour before she was supposed to be in school.
"Well, as far as I can see, your mom ain't a slut," Sam spoke up finally.
"That's a nice thing to say Sam but I'm afraid she is."
