Chapter 1: A Servant You Really Don't Want To Have
Ten years.
After a meager period of ten years, the war between sever heroes and seven Magi started anew. A war for a wish the Holy Grail would grant to the winner. A war whose predecessor ended in devastation, as hundreds of innocent people died in a cataclysmic fire. The Fourth Grail War was a disaster under all aspects, bringing only grief and pain to all it's participants and the people of Fuyuki City.
Fuyuki City lost over four hundred people in the fires that suddenly appeared in its local park.
All Fourth Grail War's participants – Master or Servant mattered little – had lost something in that tragedy. Be it family, friends, ideals, or even just a chance of hope.
Many were been affected by this war and many would look back to it with a grim look, determined to avoid repeating the mistakes committed in that war. All the Masters of the Fifth Grail War – whether they were chosen intentionally or not – all prepared for the ordeals the war would bring. All but one.
Mólies Skótoze Xechási*. The Master of Servant Caster.
The Magus who...honestly no one is going to remember or give a shit about him. He was killed by his Servant two days after summoning her, and using up all his Command Spells on nonsensical orders.
'Good riddance.' Caster grimaced in annoyance at the memory of her short-lived previous Master.
Fate had dealt Caster a bad hand with her Master. Arrogant, self-absorbed, short-sighted, lecherous, hyper-active, blond, and the list goes on. Honestly, in light of her previous life, Caster wasn't really all that surprised at the negatives qualities of her previous Master After all, the Witch of Betrayal is bound to suffer, right?
Well, she showed that arrogant, perverted snob what happens to those who try to lay their hands on her. Of course afterwards, without a Master to provide her with a source of Prana, Caster was bound to disappear. Return to the grail with even having the chance to fight for her wish. A wish of acceptance.
And yet, against all odds – as if the World was finally giving her a break – right on the verge of fading into the grail, she met him. Her Souichirou-sama. Selflessly, he saved her and gave her a place to stay. Even when she explained her nature and her situation to him, he still proceeded to aid her. For someone like her – who was always cursed and blamed by others – to be suddenly given so much with such open generosity, greatly warmed her heart. Caster knew that her Master, Souichirou-sama, was not normal. He was not emotionless, but simply cold. Yet she saw this as another attractive trait about him. And so, with renewed resolve, she set on to win the grail, so she could live with her beloved. Using her scrying abilities, she was able to find out that all the Servants have been already summoned, except for the Assassin and Saber Classes.
Caster also needed a Servant to guard the entrance to her residence, the Ryuudouji Temple. And in another timeline, across the kaleidoscope, she would have summoned a Servant Assassin who was not a "true" Heroic Spirit. Yet, surprisingly, still was a swordsman whose skill with the blade was worthy of being called legendary. In this one however, she wanted to summon a Servant of the Saber Class. After all, what better guard could exist be better than an Hero whose fame also focused on their blade; thus allowing them to be summoned into what is believed to be the "Most Outstanding" Servant Class.
So here she was – far into the hours of the night when her powers were at their highest – using her abilities of Magecraft, that she learn when the time of the Age of the Gods still existed, she altered the Summoning Ritual to obtain her desired Class. Of course such distortion to the Summoning Ritual, or better yet, such parody, is bound to have unexpected consequences.
Deep within the Throne, a "hero", and the term is being used very loosely here, heard the call to the Grail War.
'Well, well, well. Isn't this an amusing gig.' The Heroic Spirit that heard the call for the grail had been known is his world as Alucard. Arguably, the most powerful creature in his original world. A being with such strength, that him being a Vampire was practically secondary. He was known for many deeds in his long life, beginning with fighting the Turks when he was once known as Vlad the Third or Vlad Tepes, and supposedly ending with his final stand against the Nazi terrorist group known as Millennium. Note the "supposedly" part, many believe that he never really died in that battle, or he died and came back. Either way that is not our story right now.
'A summoning. To a war with seven chumps, and seven Harry Potters. Now isn't this something that has the potential to be a massive shitstorm even more than Michael Bay directing the Transformers movies.' In any case, this was not that Alucard. Oh sure, they had the same history, same legend, same power and all. However the story of this Alucard had a...unique perspective to it, and to the eventual dread and madness of all the participants of the Fifth Grail War, this Alucard chose to answer the call for the grail. 'Alright, time to bust outta this joint.' And of course, for such a distinctive Servant the grail offered a distinctive Class.
The Abridged! Class.
Yes, it comes with an exclamation mark.
As he began to materialize Alucard looked at the information the grail provided him with. 'So this little tournament where people from history text books get to show off their wangs, and it is in Fuyuki, which's in Japan.' As he finished materializing Alucard appeared in a thinking pose. "Japan, Japan. What does that remind me of?"
With the summoning complete, Caster had her first good look at her Servant. She was honestly intrigued on how someone who did not resemble a Knight – he did not even carry a sword! – could be a Saber. 'Did I fail?' Caster wondered. She saw him muttering to himself, and decided failure or not, she now had a Servant and it was time to put him to use. Thankfully, Caster had modified the Summoning Circle so the leylines would provide the Prana needed for her new Servant, while she maintained her status as the Master along with the Command Spells.
"Servant." Caster said evenly to draw the attention of man with the red trench coat.
"Japan, Japan. Oh, now I remember. Zombie apocalypse. Aaah, good times." Said Alucard as the memory finally returned to him. Who would have thought that one little undead could have caused such a mess. Still, cleaning up the mess was fun as hell.
Caster blinked at her Servant's exclamation 'What apocalypse?' The grail provided her with an explanation for the term, which only made her more confused at what the Servant was talking about. 'Not important, later.' She shook off her wayward thoughts and regained her balance. "Servant." She tried again with a much more serious tone.
Finally gaining his attention, Alucard turned to answer Caster. "And you are?"
Caster straighten her back and with answered with confidence. "Your Master."
Alucard took an appeasing look at her, and then replied. "Yes. Yes, you are~. So how much do you get for this gig?"
"What?" Caster asked in puzzlement.
"I mean, I don't mind the whole S&M thing, it add flavor to try it out every once in a while, but I don't like to be cheated out of my money." Alucard already knew who Caster was, however the reason for his conversation start is...fuck it, because he wants to see how long until she completely loses it.
Sadly for Caster, the grail provided her with information for the terms that were just used as well. Her jaw dropping as soon as she realized what her Servant was talking about. "Y-y-you d-disgusting, lecherous whelp." Caster cast a lightening spell meant to torture with electrocution the victim and cook them from the inside out. For a normal person, it would be a painful almost instant death. For a Servant, it would definitely hurt, a lot, but it would not kill them. "How dare you insinuate that I'm some service woman! Understand who you are talking to! I am your Master in this Grail War, and I will not tolerate such insults!"
As the spell hit Alucard, he simply...remained standing where he was, being electrocuted and not even flinching. "Woah, looks like we've got one with a temper here."
In response, Caster charged her spell with a shout and let it end with an explosive blast. It was a good thing that she had placed a Bounded Field earlier, otherwise the whole neighbourhood would have seen that. There was a bit of smoke from her attack that quickly disappeared, showing Alucard still where he was, without even a hint of injury. "Damn, I didn't know that frying people with lightning was the way to greet them these days. Talk about a shocking welcome."
Caster's eye twitched in annoyance at see how her Servant wasn't even affected. She sighed and messaged her temples, trying to ward off the incoming headache, when a sudden thought came to her. 'This is odd. I'm not usually that quick to lose my temper, even if the Servant so far has proved to be detestable.' She decided to take a quick look at the Servant stat sheet, using the occasion to also find out his Class. Sure she could ask him, but currently Caster felt like she wanted to keep her interaction with this Servant to a minimum.
What she found out proved that, it really was a good idea to minimalize her interactions with the Servant...and ultimately futile. "Servant...Abridged?"
"Wrong!" Alucard instantly interrupted her. "It is Abridged! You need to say it with feeling."
Caster ignored him and looked again at Alucard's stat sheet. 'He has sarcasm as a skill.' Her eye twitched again at what she's seeing. 'And what in Hades' name is "Troll"? What's with this useless description?' Caster kept looking at the stat sheet until her mind's eye landed on "Symptoms Of The Surreal". Caster's eye twitched once again, violently this time and she slowly started to develop a mind crushing headache. 'I summoned an false version of the Servant. Not only that, but this skill forcibly induce the Master to lose their temper while dealing with the Servant. Does this means he exists solely to annoy his Master?'
Oooh Caster, you have no idea how true that is.
"You know, you should get that eye of yours checked. Seriously, you look like you might get an ulcer or something." Alucard supplied helpfully.
Instantly, Caster once again lost her temper. "Silence! I will not be made a mockery of by a-"
However, whatever she was going to say next was interrupted by Alucard's next action. "Well, this greet and meet has been fun, but I'm going for a walk." And with that he turned and began to walk away.
"What?" Caster asked in bewilderment at what her Servant just said. Immediately she regained her bearings and shouted at the impulsive Servant. "Servant, I order you to come back here at once. You can't leave the mountain. You won't be able to gain your Prana without it." Shame that she never got his name, maybe then she could have seen his Noble Phantasms and realized the futility of her actions.
"That's what she said. By the way, I want my room to have a view. Later!" Alucard replied back as he disappeared within the shadows, leaving the Ryuudouji Temple.
"Abridged!" Shouted Caster.
"Well what do you know, she did say the title with feelings this time." As Alucard passed the threshold of the temple, he immediately felt as if he was losing all his strength. Realizing that he lost the connection to Prana maintaining him in this world, he easily fixed the problem and used the souls he had acquired in his life to continue on.
"Now then, what to do?" Wondered our psychotic "hero".
A/N: (*) Just thought I should mention this. Mólies Skótoze Xechási - Mólis skóto̱se xechásei - soon killed forgotten
