Blinded By Love
By Serena Kenobi
Author's note: I'm so sorry I haven't been posting as much as I usually do. Busy busy busy!! Anyhoo, hope you like this chapter!!!
Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars cause I'm paying for the DVDs.
Hoth was far away from Polis Massa, and even at lightspeed it would take us three days to get there. During those three days Taronel tried, futilely, to talk to me and make conversation, but I was in no mood for any conversation with him, being too upset at him to even speak in a polite tone to him. On the third day around 1300 hours, I heard a beeping on my console, and Taronel said, "We're coming up on the coordinates. Where are you going, anyway?"
"You'll see," I said shortly, refusing to elaborate. Although he had tried to draw the information out of me, I had stubbornly repudiated him and didn't tell him one thing.
As soon as we dropped out of lightspeed, however, he gasped in horror. "Hoth!" He exclaimed. "You're going to the Hothsystem! But this is one of the coldest and most barren places in the galaxy! And in case you haven't been listening to the news, the Rebels and the Empire-"
"And in case you haven't been listening to me," I interrupted, temper flaring, "this is my ship, and my life. I have to go here to find some information."
"Information? Padme, this is insane!"
"Be that as it may," I replied coolly, "you are not my father."
He shut up after that, but continued grumbling under his breath. Obviously he didn't know how stubborn I could be when I wanted to. Well, he was about to find out.
We landed close to the Rebel base, but as there were very few life signs, I doubted there were any humans left. I threw on my cloak, and being forced to take Taronel's arm for guidance, we walked out of the ship and into the cold.
"This is madness," he grumbled.
"Then you can go back if you want to, you are not further obligated to continue to go with me," I snapped.
"No, no. I said I would help you, and I will."
We entered the ruins of the Rebel base, and Taronel whistled. "Wow, what a mess."
"Do you think you could locate the archives?" I asked.
"Maybe. But in this kinda disaster, it'll take a while to find."
"Just do it," I ordered. "I need information."
"Why?" He asked, confused.
I hesitated. "It's classified."
"Fine," he sighed, and led me to an abandoned seat. "Wait here."
After a few short minutes, I heard his voice, farther off across the room, say, annoyed, "It might help if I knew what kind of information I was looking for, Milady."
"I'm looking for files on people. Anything. Anyone." Maybe, just maybe, they'll be in there.
I heard another sigh. "Very well."
See-Four-Me came up beside me. "Bless me, how cold it is here," she said, still managing to keep her tone light. She wasn't fussy or stuffy like Threepio, and I liked her personality. "Do you need another cloak, Mistress?"
I smiled, shaking my head. "No thank you, See-Four-Me. You can, however, aid Doctor Taronel in searching for some data files."
"At once, Mistress."
Over the next half hour, I sat there, feeling very useless and out of place. Taronel told me when he had found a new data file, but as I couldn't read them, he had to read them to me after he had finished looking for other files in that spot. For the next few days, we stayed on the base, going back to the ship at night to sleep. We found some files that could be usable, but for the most part, we had little luck. Taronel told me most of them were either destroyed or missing, most likely taken by the Empire.
Taronel had finished reading to me the latest file he had discovered one night while we were on the ship, and then he was silent for a moment. I was also silent, wondering if I would ever find my children again. But then, he spoke. "Padme… what if you don't find anything? What then?"
I shook my head slowly. "I don't know. I'll just keep searching, I suppose."
"But why is it so important you find them?"
"They're my children!" I exclaimed. "They've never even met me!"
"Exactly," he said. "And apparently they've done fine without you so far. Granted, they are Rebels, but if they're grown people-"
"I have to find them. I have to know they're all right. It's my duty to myself, my husband, and my duty as a mother."
He was silent for a moment again. "Have you given any thought about… us?" He asked quietly.
I chose my next words carefully. "Yes. I have."
"So you do love me!" He said, excited.
"That's not what I meant," I replied. "I'm still sticking with my original plan. Alone."
He gave a frustrated sigh. "Padme, you're being foolish! You'll have no one to protect you!"
"I'll be fine. I'll get a nice, little cottage on Naboo or some distant planet away from everywhere else and live peacefully for the rest of my life. With my children."
A pause, then, "Isn't there anything I can say to make you change your mind?"
I only smiled.
"Right. That's what I thought. Well, it's getting late. I'm turning in. Shout if you need anything." He put a hand on my shoulder and left the room.
I stayed up long into the night, listening to the howling of the wind outside. The weather, somewhat ironically, seemed to mirror my turbulent emotions and feelings at the time, what with the swirling snow and the screaming, blustery wind and all. Would I ever be able to find peace? I had not known it in my lifetime.
Anakin. I missed him more than I could put it into words. He had been my life… well, better not to dwell on it. It would only make me feel worse. That was the past. This was the present. Finding and finally reunited with my children was the future. It was time to start looking forward. But that didn't mean I was about to forget him. Never.
"I think we've done all we can here," I said finally, defeated, nearly a week after we had arrived. There wasn't much noise, only the quiet beeping of Dee and the sound of See-Four-Me's joints moving, and the clattering and rustling of Taronel trying to find new files. "There's nothing of value here."
A sudden crash resonated from far off, and my head snapped towards the sound. "What was that?" I demanded.
"I hear voices," Taronel said, deadpan. "We should leave. It could be pirates."
I started to hear voices coming towards us, and I stood up. "I agree. Let's get out of here."
Taronel grabbed my arm and pulled me along in the opposite direction of the voices. "Hurry up!" He hissed to See-Four-Me.
"Oh my," she said, her voice still not sounding very worried.
The three of us rushed along the forgotten corridors, and suddenly, Taronel swore under his breath and halted abruptly.
"What?" I said, growing more concerned.
"I took the wrong route," he said, sounding angry, "and now this way's blocked. And by the sound of it, those voices are blocking the only entrance out to the ship."
"So we're trapped?" I said, dreading the answer.
"I'm afraid so. Unless I can turn back and find another way out…"
"Let's go back," I said suddenly. "Those men might not be pirates. It's the only way out, anyway, and you and I both know it."
"It's too dangerous-"
"They're going to find us either way, Taronel."
I heard him curse again, and he roughly yanked me back in the direction from which we had just come. The voices, all male, grew steadily closer, and finally, they sounded only a few yards away from us. "Let me go in first," Taronel said in a low voice.
"No," I objected, "I'm the politician. I might be able to negotiate with them." Before he could persuade me otherwise, I released myself from his grasp and felt my way into the room where the voices were. I knew it was foolish, but I had to make a decision. Once I entered, the voices grew silent.
"What's this?" A gruff male voice asked.
"A beautiful woman all the way here on this desolate planet? Who are you, gorgeous?" Another asked.
"I'm…" I was wise enough not to give my real name, so I said, "I'm Corde." My heart felt a pang as I remembered my loyal handmaiden who had died for me all those years ago. "I'm sorry, but I can't see you. I'm blind."
"Blind? Well, now, this is interesting," a new voice said, sounding truly curious. "How would a blind woman get all the way out here on her own?"
Taronel stepped up next to me. "She didn't," he said in a menacing voice, slipping an arm around my waist. "I'm her husband."
I liked this chapter. Let me know if you did, too! Cheerio!
MtFbwy,
-Serena Kenobi
