Only You
"I am finding out that maybe I was wrong
That I've fallen down and I can't do this alone
Stay with me, This is what I need, Please.
Sing us a song and we'll sing it back to you
We could sing our own but what would it be without you?
I am nothing now and it's been so long
Since I have heard the sound, the sound of my only hope
This time I will be listening.
This heart, it beats, beats only for you
My heart is yours."
My Heart- Paramore
Mood Music: My Heart by Paramore, Yours by Dizmas, Beethoven's Romance #1
I know I didn't get a sneak peak out... This chapter was one of the more difficult ones for me to write because I wanted to incorporate both present and past in a way that didn't seem cheesy. Hopefully it worked
Italics are memories.
Edward stood in the hallway, his hand tugging incessantly on the ends of his hair. Jasper stood next to him a hand of support placed on his shoulder. He had been making some rounds, he wasn't gone twenty minutes and yet the scene before him was immensely different.
Carlisle exited the room a gentle frown on his face.
"What happened?" Edward growled his eyes scanning over her room still packed with hospital workers.
"I'm not quite sure," Carlisle looked into his son's eyes, "I was down the hall putting some orders in and the next thing I know her alarms are going off. All of them."
"What does it mean?" Edward felt lost and from the look on his father's face he realized he probably looked it too.
"She isn't responsive. Her heart is doing poorer than we originally thought and it's put her in a type of coma."
"So get her out of it."
"It isn't that simple son; you and I both know that."
There is noise all around him, a general hustle and bustle of people. Each moves in and out of view as he buries his head in her hair taking deep breaths, breathing her in. Edward's eyes are still filled with tears, steadily and slowly streaming down his face. Her hair blocks this site to others but he knows that she can feel it, that she is aware; because she is awake.
It was rather late at night, but that did little to comfort Edward or lull him to sleep. While the hospital was rather quiet, two machines steadily beeped and blipped. A subtle glimpse at what Bella and the baby's hearts were doing. The noise wasn't what was keeping him awake; after all it couldn't drown out the noise of his thoughts.
She had been here for a month.
Edward could feel himself slowly losing hope, letting the negative thoughts of everyone around him consume him. He was a doctor after all, and he knew all of the facts, all of the statistics. The outcome wasn't looking good.
He found his eyes tracing the outline of her face as he willed the ever present burning in his eyes to go away. He wasn't strong enough for her. He was weak. He had been crying way too much.
Closing his eyes for a moment he could picture her beautiful brown eyes looking up at him, giving him strength. His eyes opened and met hers.
He gasped and the tears began to fall.
For a moment, a very brief moment, they connected. And then her eyes closed once again. He could see her eyelids fluttering, fighting to open and the hope he had lost roared through his body.
"I'm here my Bella." His voice was weak and he prayed she could hear him. "Fight for me love."
He buried his face in her neck, his tears streaking both of their skin. He clung to her, clung to the knowledge that she was there and finally released the sobs he had been holding back.
He hears his father talking and drowns him out, instead focusing on making his breathing match hers. She had been asleep for a long time, too long. Each movement of her body makes his body sing in delight. He knew she would wake up.
He knew it.
There was a soft knock on the door and Edward looked up, laying his book on the table next to him his eyes meeting his fathers.
"The nurse said that you wanted to see me son."
Edward sat up a bit more, his face beaming in pride as his fingers gently stroked Bella's hand affectionately. "She woke up last night. I was sitting in here and she just opened her eyes and looked at me."
His father looked at him, not saying anything and Edward immediately recognized the face. The pit of his stomach dropped and he could feel the anger building inside of him.
"She WAS awake."
Carlisle studied him for a moment before pity crossed his features. Edward watched him make his way across the room to stand beside him. "Son, you haven't been sleeping. It's very likely you imagined it or dreamed it. I'm so sorry but she has only been showing minor signs of improvement."
"I'm not imagining it DAD," the word was growled out and Carlisle took a step back sighing as he pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Son," his eyes were filled with sorrow, something Edward wasn't expecting and didn't wish to see, "We're just trying to keep the baby healthy."
The words struck him like a bucket of cold eyes and he looked up at his father.
"I'm sorry son."
His sobs filled the room and the tears ran down his face. He looked at the love of his life, lying helpless and stood; his body was shaking. He moved to be closer to her, moved to touch her once again, to will her to wake up and prove to his father. He made it two steps before he crumpled on the floor.
Carlisle sat next to him, gently rubbing his hand along Edward's back listening to the sobs escape his lips. Both men were startled by a gentle groan, each raising their head and looking at the body lying in bed.
"Edward."
Pushing all of his energy into his movement he made it to the bed, quickly lying next to her and stroking her hair.
"Don't worry love," he whispered, "I'm not giving up on you."
"We gave you a combination of medicines. Some of them such as the beta-blocker were to help keep you stable. Others were to try and counteract the effects of the medication on the baby." Carlisle continued to speak and Edward continued to drown him out.
"Will it have any effect on the baby?" Bella questioned, concerned about the health and safety of her child.
"We've been monitoring it and haven't noticed any changes, but there is no guarantee. Our priority has always been to keep you two as healthy and as safe as possible."
She nodded in acknowledgement and her hair tickled his face making him nuzzle it into her neck. Carlisle cleared his throat and Edward pulled back letting his father see his tear streaked face.
"Perhaps I should let you and Edward speak privately and I can explain the rest later." A moment later the room is clear of people. It's quiet, and surprisingly comfortable.
Edward places his hand on her belly tenderly, lovingly stroking the bump.
Edward sits with Jasper and Rose. There is an uncomfortable silence that fills the room and Edward doesn't know what to do to break it. He and Rose were still not on the best terms and the tension it causes only seems to create more stress for him.
And that is something he doesn't need.
His eyes are burning from lack of sleep and he knows that he needs to get some rest, but he doesn't feel comfortable leaving her. And just the thought of it causes a hole in his chest that makes his body ache. He suddenly feels too far away.
He reaches his hand out laying it gently on her stomach, feeling himself relax once again. It only takes a moment for him to realize what he is feeling and a gasp escapes his lips, followed by a smile.
"The baby is kicking." His voice is filled with awe and love and he wonders if Bella is aware, if she can feel it.
Rose and Jasper move to touch her stomach as well, each smiling in joy at the subtle movement. Edward is suddenly happy that they are there, that he has someone to share this moment with and his eyes fill with tears.
A sigh flutters through the room and Jasper and Rose pull back looking shocked.
"She is slowly waking up," Edward says his voice filled with pride. "The medicine is working."
Leaning down he places a kiss against her stomach and then her forehead. It brings him comfort knowing that the baby is still alright, that Bella is still in there. He will not leave her side.
"How long have I been asleep for?" Her eyes search his nervously and he finds himself running his hands through his hair. Her eyes are devastatingly beautiful to him and he finds himself wanting to hide in them, to not have to deal with more problems.
"For a while."
"Edward?" He knows the tone, and has heard her use it before and hearing it now has no less affect on him. Her eyes leave him and look down at her protruding stomach, her hand gently running across the swollen flesh. "I'm quite a bit bigger."
He winces at this and leans down placing a kiss on her head. "You were six and a half months along when you went under."
Bella nodded her head willing him to continue.
"You are now eight and a half months along."
"I've been out for TWO months?" She gasped in alarm and he quickly wraps his arms around her, hushing and calming her as her breathing spikes.
His arms are wrapped around her, holding her to him, clinging to her. Although Bella doesn't respond Edward can feel the heat of her body, the movement of her chest as she breathes, and he finds this soothing.
He was forced to leave her to check on a patient, and he didn't like it. His thoughts consumed him with worries the entire time he was away and he knew what he was going to have to do. He just wasn't sure how to do it.
There was a knock at the door and his father entered, setting some paperwork on the bedside table.
"What's that?" Edward asks.
"The paperwork to take a leave of absence," Carlisle answers knowingly. "I filled out everything I could for you."
There is an unspoken moment between father and son, and Edward looks up at him gratefully. Family is his priority and suddenly it doesn't seem like such a silly thing to ask for.
Bella's breathing has calmed and she lays there looking up at him so fucking devastatingly beautiful that it makes his breathing hitch.
"Not you too." She jokes trying to lighten the heavy mood before she suddenly look serious. "I don't remember a lot from when I was out," her voice breaks as her eyes fill with tears. She looks up at him as she continues to speak, "but I remember the feeling of you holding me, of knowing I was safe, loved. I remember opening my eyes and looking into yours for a brief moment and I remember hearing you sob and calling out your name."
She moves her hand to lie in his hair, gently stroking it, and his chest tightens as she continues to talk.
"The medicine burned," her nose scrunched in distaste, "so badly that it felt like it was consuming me. But it didn't matter because you were there with me, by my side, holding me. I don't remember much, Edward, but I do remember the overwhelming love I felt for you."
Her voice broke as she pulled him closer. Their lips almost touching as she continued to speak.
"You never gave up hope, even when it seemed hopeless. You lost sleep, left your job, your family, to stay by my side. You brought me back from the darkness, each and every time I needed it. You brought me back Edward, only you."
She kisses him then, gently guiding him to her as her lips fold over his. The tears fall down his face, but he doesn't care and he isn't embarrassed.
Behind his eyes he pictures the moment she woke; the moment their eyes connected and he truly saw her. What was it he had said?
"There you are."
His mind replays this moment over and over as her lips fold over his. It isn't until now that he realizes he was speaking of himself as well. A part of him was missing while she was gone and she brought it back with her.
She brought it back to him.
Special thanks to my beta Pixielovestoshop for looking this over so quickly!
Not quite finished… but getting closer to the finish line! Thanks to all of you who reviewed or added this story to your alerts or favorites! I'm amazed by the response this story has gotten, you guys are awesome!
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