Hey Chapter 6 (this one) is hopefully finally working, you'll find a few compaints of ity not existing in subsequent chapters just ignore them. Tell me what you think (:

Richelle Mead owns VA. I do not ):

Not a lot happened at school after that until the day of The Trials dawned. It was the most important day of my life so far and I'd be damned if I failed. Everyone was already in the little hut when I got there and someone barked at me that it was a good job I wasn't first because I was late. People were standing around with their mentors. I'd always imagined I'd be getting last minute advice from Dimitri. I pushed him out of my mind when tears threatened to surface. It had been over three months and I was still crying over him. It was stupid.

I leaned against a wall and did a few stretches not sure when my turn was. Alberta was out there fighting people so she couldn't come and see me. A guardian from the elementary campus pressed a piece of paper into my hand.

Rose,

Keep calm and take some deep breaths. Take it one step at a time. Don't come up with too many options in one go but keep your options open. Don't let your guard down.

I was going to come and see you but Alberta decided she wanted me out there too to make up the numbers. Keep in mind everything that Dimitri taught you and use your brain.

You can pass this.

Good luck sweetheart,

Mom.

I was going to have to fight Mom again? Oh man, I'd better win this time.

I was glad she was here, the letter was a comfort and I felt more secure knowing that someone was rooting for me. I closed my eyes and took deep breaths just like she advised and was surprised by how prepared I felt. But still nothing could take away, cover or fill the hole Dimitri had once occupied in my heart.

Most of the trial went by in a blur as I concentrated on each specific task one step at a time. That is until I faced my mother. She was blocking my way on the stepping stone path that was five feet high in the air which represented thirty feet if we were in the real world. If we fell of we died. She was on the step in front of me. No kidding one step at a time. One step was a step I couldn't take. Damn. And then the platform I was stood on broke.

Mom's face filled with shock which was the only opening I needed. I knocked her off the step she was on by jumping and 'staking' her heart. She fell to the floor and I carried on jumping to the safety of the next obstacle – a bridge.

Whatever happened next and after that I couldn't really say. It went by in a battle filled blur and then it was over. Then there was the Promise Mark ceremony. And then the after parties.

Adrian, surprise surprise, had managed to get a large lounge and had a soft drinks bar set up and a bunch of people were already in there by the time I arrived after having a shower and throwing a skirt on. Royals and Dhampirs were there trying to find the perfect charge or guardian. I didn't bother because I already knew who I was going to protect.

"You'll never be Vasilisa's guardian if I have anything to do with it." Tatiana's words ghosted through my mind.

Lissa ran over to me and threw her arms around my neck saying how awesome I was and stuff like that. Mom was next. She limped slightly and winced when she moved her left arm to give me a hug.

"I knew you could do it, Rose."

Alberta was milling around and she nodded once in my direction and then turned back to the conversation she'd been having with some royal. Even Dimitri, my tough love mentor, would have given me more than that. And then I saw him. It was only his back but I'd know the way his hair fell anywhere. And the duster. The duster I had fallen asleep under in a SUV when we were first falling in love, the duster he'd given to me when he caught me out in the rain one time when I was trying to figure out how to help Lissa when the Viktor thing was going down, the duster I'd teased him about and said it made him look like a cowboy from one of those trashy westerns he always read.

"Talk to me." I said to Adrian.

"I am talking to you." He said back. He noticed my agitation and looked round. "Ah, lover boy returns."

"Oh shut up, Adrian."

"But you wanted me to talk to you."

"But not about that. Why didn't you give me grief when he left?"

"I though you didn't want to talk about that."

"Answer the question, Adrian." I growled quickly growing irritated.

"Because you were in enough pain as it was. What kind of gentleman would I be if I made that pain worse?"

I didn't answer seriously doubting if he knew what a gentleman was. Instead I gave him my orange juice and went to find Lissa. She was talking with Eddie and Christian. They were on about Eddie's trial which sounded completely awesome. I hadn't been around to see it – he'd already finished by the time I arrived so I was pretty interested. But they conversation quickly closed on that topic and Eddie was called away. Lissa turned to me.

"Mia's here. She said Dimitri brought her, have you seen him yet?"

"Yep." I said not wanting to talk about it.

"Oooh, he'll be sorry to upset you today." Christian crowed anticipating a fight. "I'll be sure to be around when that happens."

"Rose, he only did what he thought was best." Lissa said. "I thought you respected his decision."

"Doesn't mean I have to like it. He should be out in the field not sat behind some stupid desk. He could have let you heal him and he didn't."

"Uh, Rose – "

"He's been an idiot and he should have –"

"Rose – "

"Let you help him. And –"

Rose! Lissa shouted through the bond shutting me up. Christian looked kind of pale and I had a good idea what was wrong.

"And what, Rose?" I knew that voice anywhere. I'd know it a hundred years from now, a thousand. His accent wrapped around me like a swirl of wind, calm and caressing, soft and powerful. My heart did a back flip and I found it hard to breathe. I could feel his presence, his aura of power and authority. He was only a small – and I mean small – step behind me. I could feel his duster brushing against my back and could smell his aftershave. That scent wrapped around me like a blanket reminding me of all the times we'd been close, all the times we kissed.

"You made the wrong decision." I said firmly and walked away.

I had the impression that not only was he wearing his pissed off face but that he tried to follow me but Lissa stopped him. I felt magic well within her as she fixed his hand even though he hadn't asked her too. It was a subconscious act and she barely even realised she was doing it until Dimitri gasped. I looked over my shoulder and saw him flex his withered looking fingers and the awe in his face.

At least he's okay now, I thought. Stop it Rose, you are angry with him remember?

I carried on walking and didn't stop until I was outside again. I slowed down feeling release and enjoyed the sun. It wasn't very often got to see the sun and I missed it all the time. As I soaked in the vitamin D I lost track of my worries and just sat under a tree and watched time go by. It was sunset before anyone came to find me. It was my mom who did.

"I thought you'd be happy to see Guardian Belikov again."

"So did I." I confessed.

"So what do you feel?"

Honesty I didn't really know. I was angry and upset and disappointed and a bazillion other things but I didn't know what to do. I could have found him and screamed and shouted, I could have found him and cried, I could have found him and forgiven him but I didn't want to do any of those things. Did I want him to find me and apologise? Did I want him to make the first move? Whatever I wanted or didn't want I couldn't exactly talk to Mom about it. Alright now that I had graduated no one could actually do anything about our romance – or there lack of – but I didn't want to get him in trouble with my mom. He might be my badass Russian jailor but I wasn't sure he could beat my seriously pissed off mother.

"Angry." I confessed. "Confused."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

Spokane had done a lot for our relationship but as soon as I said that she shut down and assumed that I didn't want to talk to her. I didn't correct her because I wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone right now. She swiftly got up and said something and then left. I banged my head against the trunk of the tree and swore for no particular reason I could think of.

A while after the sun had set I went back to my room and packed everything ready for tomorrow. Tomorrow we were to go to court and get our official charges.

"You'll never be Vasilisa's guardian if I have anything to do with it."

"Expendable, expendable."

"She's wild, unruly and can't follow orders!"

"You'll never be Vasilisa's guardian."

I blocked out the sounds of the doubting voices and forced myself to sleep.

I had a dream that night. I was sneaking out of the dorms and was excited about something. The hall warden didn't notice me although she was looking straight at me. I slipped outside into the warm air and had to stifle a scream when someone jumped out at me and grabbed my hand. I looked round in to Christian's blue eyes and once again realised how gorgeous they were.

Oh hell no. Not again. Not when I was as emotionally charged as I was.

He lips came crashing down to hers in a searing kiss that felt so good on my – her – mouth. His hands were warm and made my skin tingle. Not my skin, Lissa's skin. God this couldn't be happening. I tried to get out but I was too attached to her emotions. His lips came to mine – hers – again and I was reminded of what this felt like with Dimitri.

His name had me slammed back into my body but it was at that exact moment that I didn't want to leave because Lissa realised something enormous. I woke up in a cold sweat and felt lonely as usual after this happened but also completely curious. What had she discovered? I had a sinking feeling in the bottom of my stomach that I already knew. I hoped I was wrong but I didn't want to risk going into Lissa's head again in case I was wrong and it was just something like she realised why Christian liked a baby name so much. If she realised what I thought she had – which was just my luck – they wouldn't be, uh, amusing themselves tonight. Of course I could be wrong. I doubted it but I didn't want to risk seeing that again.

I pulled the covers back over my head and curled up into a ball waiting for sleep to overtake me. Only it didn't straight away. My mind strayed back to the lunch we'd shared after I passed the qualifier. And I had a major realisation of my own. Dimitri hadn't told me the true extent of his injuries then because he was still trying to process it himself and trying to figure out what to do. He'd protected me from the awful truth so that we could have a few last normal moments together. He'd intended to tell me at a better time than in the car and have a civil discussion with me about it. Damn.

Even though I'd realised all that I couldn't let my anger go. He could have at least tried to explain that to me. All it would have taken was for him to ask to talk to me and I would have readily agreed knowing that it would have been our last conversation and treasured it.