A/N: Ok, since im feeling such in a perfect mood this week, stopped smoking thats why! LOL I want to make a special note. I want to thank all of you guys from the deepest of my heart for your reviews!! JohnCenasgurl: you are so supportive with all my writings and everytime I end a chapter, I think about you, thinking, Hum, I shouldn't leave her with such a cliffie...lol Thanks girl! REM4488: Your nice comments and interest always make me smile and want to update right away. Shastalily: I cant say how much I'm happy you decided to read my wrestling fics, being a part of the xenaverse, it touches me more than I can say. Thanks a lot you're awesome! K.I.M: Ive said it before and ill say it again, you are so nice, every comment you make is really important to me...Huntersgirl: Youve been one of the forst to review my stories, im really proud you're still around. Thanks. TDOT: You rock girl and you know it! You also know how much of a friend you've became to me... I dont have enough spaces to talk about evryone, but all of the others, including, JOHNRANDYLOVER, Randy's girl, I love you all...its you guys who keep me going. I dont mean to forget anyone, im just getting too emotionnal at the time and I need to stop. But THANK YOU everyone, ill do my best to please you.....And to my dear cuzzie, you've become more like a sister to me and I love you so much.....

John sadly shook his head and loosen his grasp on Sean. He wiped the blood from his nose and held his hands in front of his brother's eyes.

" You see that Sean? That is not just my blood, it's also the same blood that run inside your veins. We are brothers Sean. I'm not going to hit you. Even tough I should, for making Xandra cry. But we're family, we should be above violence. I forgive you."

The other members let out a sigh of relief. They were proud and surprise that John had contained his anger. Catherine walked towards her younger son and hugged him. She dragged him out of the room, telling him they needed to talk. Sean followed her, looking ashamed at the bed where Xandra was still hiding. They could still hear her cries from under the covers.

Matt and Dan patted John on the back and left the room, closing the door behind them. They knew John would want to be the one comforting Xandra.

He sat on the bed, holding his head between his knees. He sighed deeply. How could things have come to this? For the first time in an eternity, he had been honest with the girl he had loved forever. He had showed his feelings. But it had to be the same girl his brother loved too. What was he suppose to do? He had remained in the shadows when Sean and Xandra had a relationship, he hid his feelings so deep he almost convinced himself they were gone. Even at the Prom, he had hesitated, not sure if the time was right. And then she left, and he had truly believed he would never get another chance of telling her how he felt. What she meant to him. But she had came back in his life. Ok, he had to admit it was in the worst circomstances ever, but it gave them a chance to finally be honest to one another.

That was the good side of the story, the bad side was Sean. John had no intention to hurt his brother, but he's had his chance with Xandra and it didn't work. Now, John wasn't going to let the occasion slip through his hands again. It was the last chance he had to build something with the girl he loved.

He moved the covers from her face, staring at her puffy red eyes, the sadness of her face and the tears running down her cheeks. He wished so much he could have taken it all away. But time was running out for both of them, he was leaving soon. With his thumbs, he tenderly wiped the tears from her face. He opened his arms and she sat on his lap, more than happy to accept the embrace they both needed so much. They didn't need words this time, love was more than enough.

When I woke up, it was to see John' worried eyes staring down at me. Was I good at nothing but to scare or worry people? Since when did I became so weak? What have I done? I had destroyed a family. My heart almost stopped beating when Sean bursted into the room and hit John. I thought they were going to kill each other.

I still don't know how or why exactly John managed it, but the explosion we expected from him never happened. He looked more sad than angry towards his brother. It was all my fault. But for once, I had the courage not to fell into despair, cause I could feel John reaching out for me. He needed to know I was there and that I loved him, even though we never said a word. For the first time, I felt like I was the one comforting him, not the other way around. What was he scared of?

Dan and Matt had took the first chance they had to leave the house. They didn't like the drama and wouldn't want to be forced to take sides. They let Sean explains himself with their parents while John and Xandra were comforting one another.

Sean was in the kitchen, looking down at the cup of tea his mom just made. She was looking at him with disapoitment in her eyes while John Sr. was pacing back in forth, mumbling.

" My dear boy," Started his mom." I don't know what got into you. You've been scaring Alex since she got here and now you're picking a fight with John? We love you Sean and we want to help you, but you have to tell us what's wrong?"

He stubornly kept his eyes down. Sean knew he was acting like a teenager but he was so confused he didn't cared. Had he ever stopped loving Xandra? He couldn't find the answer.

" Sean," Went on Catherine." For Alex's sake, we need to clear things out. She was suppose to come here to grieve in peace, not to find herself caught between you and John's affection for her."

" But what am I suppose to do mom? I know she's scared, I know she's hurt. But John stole her from me, should I just sit back and smile? Don't I have all the rights to feel angry?"

She sighed before answering. " My dear boy, John didn't steal anything and especially not anyone from you. Your relationship with Alex ended almost five years ago. I think your feelings got confused because you cannot bear to see her suffer so much. I can also understand your jealousy towards what's growing between her and John though. But he didn't stole her from you. I've watched all of you grow up and it pains me to see what it had to came to, you know. I've always knew who would end up with her and that it wouldn't be you. John and her had always undertsand each other better than anyone else, even as kids. He was always willing to protect her, they would share everything. I've guessed really soon that the day would come where they would have to realise the true nature of their feelings. And even if it hurts you to hear it Sean, I'm glad that day finally happened. It is helping Alex deal with her parents's loss and it will help John while he'll be away. They belong together, always had. Sean, your father and I know it, you have to accept it and they still have to understand it. She is like your sister, she needs her best friend back more than ever. Please, don't make her regret going out with you when you were in High School."

Sean nod, understanding what his mother was telling him, he knew she was right. Tears filled his eyes. He realised he was indeed jealous of John, but not really because of Xandra. He was jealous of John's strong side, his confidence. He also had, he decided to admit the thruth to his parents, something that had ruined the last two weeks for him. That's was what truly got him scared and confused.

" Mom, Dad, I have something to tell you. I'm scared, I really am. My Unit has been called to Iraq I have to go there. I don't want to go. What if I never come back? I don't want to die, I dont want to loose any of you."

His father stopped pacing and his mom let out a gasp. Their youngest son was sent in Iraq? God, have mercy on this family, it was a nightmare after another. They understood now Sean's actions. He was scared so he was hanging on everyone he cared about. The thought of loosing Alex to John had went further than just jealousy, he had simply believed he would never see her again. His parents went to hug him, whispering comforting thoughts. John Sr. invited them to a fancy restaurant, that way they would have time to talk all of this over. While it would also give time to Alex and John to talk too...

In John's bedroom, we were still cuddling. In fact, John had fallen asleep only a few minutes after I began to run my fingers into his short hair. He had seemed so lost it had broke my heart. Was he having second thoughts about me? I didn't want to hurt anyone in the family. Not anymore. Never again.

The Cenas had always been a loving family and now all of this harmony was gone by my fault. Only because I did the only thing I swore myself never to do, admit that John was the one I always loved. I knew it would be hard, but I had needed him so much. I wanted him to love me. And he did, and it broke his family apart. So it might have been wrong after all.

There was only one thing for me to do to make things right. Wolfie seemed to sense my decision because he sat at my feet and looked at me. I smiled and scratched him behind the ears. I got up and quickly gathered my clothes and accessories and threw them into my luggages. I took the dog's leech too. I stared at John, still sleeping. I fought the urge to join him. to feel him against me. But I sighed sadly, they deserved to be happy. They were the perfect family, the only mistake they've made was to take me in. I couldn't bear the responsiblity so I would take care of everything. I put the first and last kiss ever on John's lips. He smiled in his dreams. He was so adorable and I loved him so much.

My heart and soul were torn apart just at the thought of leaving him, but I had no choice, for the sake of all the Cenas. I softly close the door behind me, Wolfie at my side. It was only when I got in the street that I allowed my unshed tears to fall down. I didn't dare to look back, affraid to loose my courage. If I did, I would run back into John's arms. But I couldn't do that. I had to be strong. But how hard would it be? Facing the future alone, and even worst, without John???.Was it a future I wanted to have?.......