Before she knew it Emma was ringing Regina's doorbell.
"Oh man" she aloud to herself, suddenly regretting her impulsive decision and wondering if it was too late to run. The door opened.
"Emma" Regina smiled "Henry said he invited you."
"I declined, just so you know" Emma said, feeling that it was important to say so, even if the physical evidence contradicted it, "I need to talk to you about something."
Regina stepped back, inviting her inside. She closed the door and walked up the stairs.
"Would you like a drink?" She asked over her shoulder
"No thanks" Emma made no move to follow Regina to the kitchen.
Regina turned and walked slowly back down the steps towards her.
"Is everything alright?" She asked, suddenly concerned.
"Yes, yeah, I'm fine, er" Emma fumbled and internally berated herself for not knowing what to say. She never imagined herself telling Regina, because she thought Robin would. She was unprepared.
"I need to talk to you about when you were cursed" she said. Her mind raced as she tried to align what Gold had told her, what Robin had done and what she felt banging in her chest at that moment.
Regina drew in a breath and nodded. No one spoke.
"Ok?" Regina said eventually.
"Well" Emma felt like she might throw up. She was more nervous than she could ever remember being in front of Regina. Sentences wouldn't form in her mind. She opened her mouth and hoped that what tumbled out would make sense.
"It wasn't Robin who woke you up it was me, it was an accident, I'm sorry, I mean I'm not sorry because you're awake but I'm sorry I didn't tell you the truth right away, but I didn't know what it meant and, God I'm so nervous-"
"Emma. Take a breath" Regina said. She looked over her shoulder to see the door to the living room was closed. Emma assumed Henry was in there.
"Did you hear what I said?" Emma asked, worrying now she'd said everything far too fast and would have to repeat it.
"I did" Regina replied, watching Emma like she expected her to continue.
Emma raised her hands and dropped them to her sides again. She didn't know whether to be relieved or disappointed by this anticlimax.
"Ok well I asked Gold about True Love's Kiss and-" Emma began
"You spoke to Gold about this?" Regina interrupted and took a slightly threatening step towards her.
"Yeah" Emma said "I...wanted...to know"
"Why didn't you just ask me?" Regina frowned at her.
All the very sensible reasons that Emma had to ask Gold rather than Regina took that as their cue to immediately vacate her mind.
"Now you've said it, it seems so obvious" Emma said. She wasn't even fidgeting out of nervousness. All of her limbs felt heavy.
"I just panicked" she said.
Regina looked half amused at least, so Emma knew she wasn't about to be thrown out of her house or burnt to a crisp.
"About what?" Regina asked.
"I didn't understand it. I didn't know...it could be, y'know…platonic" Emma struggled. The word seemed clinical and odd. It didn't fit their dynamic at all.
Regina's eyebrows rose slowly as she realised what Emma was saying. Her expression softened and she tipped her head to one side.
"What?" Emma asked. Regina smiled but didn't speak. "What?" Emma repeated, more forcefully. She could see that Regina understood. Emma had, at least for a while, considered that she might be in love with Regina without realising.
"I'm sorry" Regina said "I forget how little you really know of magic."
Emma thought this was one of those things that people say thinking they sound nice but actually weren't at all.
"So you believe me?" Emma asked, relieved by Regina's reaction.
After a moment a wrinkle returned to Regina's brow and Emma regretted asking.
"Of course I do." She said "Although I have no idea why you would tell me this now and not at the time or any time in the last 3 days, and why you involved half the town in your decision to tell me."
"Regina!" Emma protested, now receiving something closer to the reaction she had expected.
"What did Robin think?" Regina asked before Emma could answer her other accusations.
"He was fine" Emma replied "he said it was sisterly and he got it, which was nice I guess. I don't know, it made me feel weird. He didn't want me to tell you and that's why-"
"-you had to" Regina finished her sentence
"Yes!" Emma said, then immediately sensed that Regina didn't think she did.
"Why tell me at all?" Regina asked, taking another step towards her "even now that you know true love has to be reciprocated. Even now you know it can be platonic? Isn't it enough to know that I care about you?"
Emma got momentarily stuck on 'I care about you' and wondered if this was the first time Regina had acknowledged that she even liked her.
"Are you mad at me because you think I hurt Robin's feelings?" Emma pushed back, refusing to accept his emotional state as her responsibility.
"I couldn't watch him lie to you. It made me squirm. I like Robin, you know I do, if he didn't have such a problem with sheriffs I would for sure want him on my team." The bad feeling in Emma's chest had turned to a throb that only seemed to be relieved by letting out her frustrations.
"I just wanted you to know." Emma said, her voice raised "I wound want to know, and I'm not lying to Henry"
"Who's lying to me?" Came Henry's voice from the door to the living room.
"No one" Regina said quickly. Henry frowned at them both.
"I thought you were done with that" he said angrily
"Henry" Regina pleaded but he disappeared upstairs in an instant. She spun on her heel and looked at Emma like she would breathe fire if she could.
"I'll go talk to him" she said in reply, holding her hands up.
"And say what?" Regina said sharply. "I accidentally woke your mother with True Love's Kiss, panicked and told everyone about it, sorry you're the last person to know, after her of course"
"Regina, you're not being fair" Emma said, tired of being spoken to like she was an idiot and not given the chance to defend herself. The ache in her chest was turning into a ball of fire.
"I don't know why you would go to him over me, even if you thought...well have you ever been in love and not realised it? " She rolled her eyes as the ridiculousness of it.
"Yeah" Emma said "I have, that's kind how it happens. First of all you're thinking 'yeah I'll give you a chance' and then one day you're like 'oh hey, I can't breathe without you'"
"Well, can you breathe?" Regina asked sarcastically
"Ugh, fuck you Regina. It's not funny" Emma said
"It is a little bit funny. You're the product of True Love. Didn't they teach you anything?" Regina asked, on the verge of a smile.
Emma stared back at her, her chest positively hurting her now.
"I'm going home" she turned
"What about Henry?" Regina asked, the humour gone from her voice which was Emma's intention.
"Why don't you talk to him? Tell him I woke you up with powerful accidental magic, sought advice and got made fun of." She reached for the door handle
"Wait" she felt Regina's hand on her back. She turned reluctantly to face her and waited.
"I'm sorry for making fun of you" Regina said.
"Are you actually or are you just saying that so I'll go and tell Henry you're not lying to him?" Emma asked, the ball in her chest deflating somewhat at the tone of Regina's voice.
"I really am sorry" Regina said. "I'll figure out what to tell him" her face relaxed into its default frown. Emma studied her face, reading in it that she was afraid Henry would not believe her, that all their progress would be lost.
"Do you want to know what I would say?" Emma asked. Regina nodded.
Emma closed her eyes, took a deep breath and spoke. She didn't know where it came from, but she knew that it was absolutely true.
"'Thank you for not giving up on me, now and every other time. Thank you for loving me when I couldn't love myself. Thank you for believing in me when I didn't believe in anything.' He knows that you love him, that might be a good time to say so" Emma opened her eyes and smiled.
Regina's eyes swam with tears. Emma's smile softened but didn't fade. Regina lifted the back of her hand to her mouth and turned away from Emma.
"Regina" she practically whispered "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said-" she stopped, feeling Regina's hand on her own. In that moment the same emotion that flooded Regina threatened to overwhelm Emma too. She realised that she had just cut Regina to the core in 3 sentences and didn't know what to do.
She returned the pressure Regina put on her hand and looked up in an attempt to keep the tears in her eyes.
Sitting cross-legged on the stairs was Henry. He smiled at her and she realised he had hear every word. She smiled back and tears spilled down her cheeks.