A/N: I'm glad you all like it, but again please give me reviews of writing.
Shiranai: thanks for the Input. While I can't change chapter one just yet, I did change it to Mune-Hime this chapter. And to put your mind at ease I always have Narutorefer to Sasuke as '-chan,' so I'll be sure to use '-teme' properly.
I have a quick warning: I'll be doing a bit of bashing on Sakura and Ino in later chapters, while it doesn't happen in this one, I thought it would be best to warn you.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
Chapter 2
Retainers and Private Areas
Shizune chirped happily as she looked at the freshest eggs and milk in the grocery store. She had woken up early to get these for Tsunade. She knew her master had drunk a lot last night, even more than her 55th birthday, and she would have a bad hangover, even with her pills. So Shizune had a sure fire cure.
She would make Tsunade a big breakfast of all her favorites.
The last time her master had been so happy.
Shizune had finished buying the goods and had made her way to the front door of Tsunade's house over looking the village. On her way there she saw Yui looking over some peppers and unions as well as a few other things. Shizune smiled, she saw that the girl was making sure everything was perfect. The look she had on her face was almost the same Naruto had when he snuck peaks at the mission scrolls in Tsunade's desk.
If the two of them were able to get along Shizune would be so happy.
But now that she looked at her, the similarities between the two of them were few. Naruto had broad shoulders and defined masculine form and face. Yui's smooth face and delicate features only complimented her full female form.
Naruto was definitely a man, Yui definitely a woman.
When Shizune reached her master's home she put the grocery bags over one arm and held them in the crook of her elbow while she pulled out her key and opened the door. It was just about six am when she began to cook the eggs, sausage, and pancakes for Tsunade. At six forty she piled it all on a tray and headed up to her masters room.
She smiled to herself as she opened the door slowly and peaked in. She saw Tsunade sprawled out on her bed. She took a deep breath, mostly to hide the little bit of butterflies that had filled her stomach, and pushed the door open with her elbow.
"Good morning Tsunade-sam…"
Joya was draped over Tsunade, her head on Tsunade's belly. The Hokage in question had not put any more underwear on and was snoring peacefully. The only thing keeping her private area from complete view was a combination of the nightie and Joya's arm, which was wrapped around her leg.
Poor Shizune saw several things that did not agree with her mental state.
1. Her master was in a very skimpy nightie that in the night had come down revealing one of her breasts.
2. She was in bed with another woman.
3. The other woman was all over Tsunade's private areas (1).
Shizune did the only thing in her decades of serving Tsunade have taught her to do.
She screamed.
Very loud.
"OH MY KAAAAAMIII-SAMAAAA!" she screeched, amazingly she did not drop the breakfast.
Tsunade sat up so fast what ever the nightie was supposed to hold back flew free like two large melon shaped bats out of hell. Joya sat up a second after her and was immediately slammed back into Tsunade's private area.
"Oh god!" groaned the masked kunoichi. She took the time to get away from Tsunade's dangerous breasts and sat up. She rubbed her heard. "Those things, by the laws of age, malleability, and physics should not be that firm…"
"Shizune what is it? Why are you so loud?" Tsunade demanded. When she saw her assistant's eyes she looked at Joya, who had just realized what reaction Tsunade's sudden rise had caused. The dribble of blood running from under Joya's mask told Tsunade everything she needed to know. Her face flushed crimson. She ran into the closet and slammed the doors.
"That is a whoooole lot of woman…" Joya whistled.
"I HATE MY LIFE!"
"I love your-"
"SAY IT AND YOU DIE!"
Joya pouted until she smelled the food. She remembered Shizune who was stone still. She looked like she had been hit with the ANBU Paralysis jutsu. The older of the two ninja stood up and took two pancakes, dribbled eggs on them, put a sausage in the middle, and rolled it all up before eating it.
"You okay girl?" Joya asked, her mouth full. She waved her hand in front of Shizune's face.
Now, dear, mentally disturbed Shizune had a myriad of thoughts running through her head.
Let's take a look!
Oh my god my master is sleeping with another woman! I wondered why she never gave into Jiraya-sama's advances! She always did take an unnatural interest in Sakura! I knew I saw them kissing after practice one day! OH MY GOD MY MASTER IS A LESBIAN!
Calm down Shizune. Even if Tsunade-sama is somehow a lover of the finer sex it's all right. She can do what she wants. If she wanted she could also make gay marriage legal again. Now that I think about…I'm sure that Tsunade-sama and Anko-san were having very frequent private meetings. And the fact Anko always left much happier than she came could mean they had sex, or it could mean they talked…
Knowing Anko they had sex…hot…S&M sex…that would be kind of…oh my god…
AM I A LESBIAN?!
Okay, that's enough of that.
"Hey! Mune-hime! I think you broke your apprentice or whatever she is!"
"What do you mean broke?" Tsunade asked. The Hokage cursed as she tried to find the strongest most unrevealing bra and underwear set she had. Unfortunately for her that was a black bra with only 70 percent lace. She cursed her love of exotic lingerie under her breath.
Joya looked at where she had placed her hand on Shizune's body and then at the closet doors. "Well I've been massaging her tight ass for the last five minutes and she just looks off into space."
A crash and the sound of plywood shattering came to Joya's trained ears. "YOU'VE BEEN WHAT?!"
"NO ANKO-SAN NOT THE WHIPS!" Shizune suddenly screamed. Joya quickly threw her hands up and made sure she was outside of instant attack range incase Shizune had come out of it because of her foreplay.
Tsunade came out of her closet with her eyebrow arched. Joya gave her old friend points for looking so calm and composed. She made it her goal for the day to make this morning the most relaxing moment of her day.
"Shizune…what you do in your free time, with Anko of all people," she muttered that last bit under her breath, "is none of my concern, but please don't go screaming parts of it out. People will talk!"
"At least she doesn't walk around begging for a cold," Joya whispered.
Tsunade's eyes flashed with anger, "Did you say something?"
"Me?"
Naruto's eyes fluttered open. He smelled something. It smelled gooood. He sat up slowly and found he had a blanket on him. Looking at the ground revealed the one had had, had fallen off in the night. The fact Ko-chan was staring at him with his black glass eyes told the rest.
It was like the doll could talk. Yep Naruto. She woke up early and decided to make you breakfast. When she came out here she saw you didn't have a blanket and she gave you one. She left me here to keep an eye out. But I knew a strong kid like you would be fine. So go on kid say good morning.
Naruto smirked. He sat up, moving Ko-chan to the couch and wrapping him in the blankets. Thanks Naruto, not as cold as the Mist but cold enough in the Leaf eh?
"Morning Yui-chan!" Naruto tried to say. He had planned to leap in and land in his chair, but when he saw her at the window he stopped and his words died. She was looking into the skillet, frying some rice. He saw the eggs mixed in and could smell the peppers. He knew he had eggs and rice, but he didn't know he had peppers.
She also went shopping Naruto, Ko-chan added in.
Naruto smiled as he watched her. She had put on one of his aprons; of which he had about fifty because of the wear and tear he put on them. She was wearing a pair of shorts that went to about mid thigh. Her top was a T-shirt he recognized from his dresser. Her hair was put up in a pigtail that hung off the top part of her head.
He remembered what he first thought about her…
She was beautiful.
"It will be ready in a few minutes Naruto-kun," she said turning to him and smiling. He nodded and sat down at his table. Yui served him his food and poured her a plate herself. When they sat down the two called out happily and dug in.
Naruto took a taste of it and moaned as if he had just gotten his ears scratched. "This is so good Yui-chan! I wish I could make rice this good!"
"It's a recipe my mother made for me when I was young. I loved it. And when I saw you also liked Miso ramen…" she smirked. Naruto looked at her with his eyebrows raised. "You have over fifty cup ramen. The majority is Miso."
Naruto nodded. Finding yet another thing they had in common didn't even faze him. Like her being there, it felt natural. "What do you want to do today Yui-chan?" he asked.
"Clean," she said almost at once.
Naruto gaped at her. "But…I thought we may-"
"Clean," she said forcefully. "Naruto-kun. Think of it this way, if you do allow me to take the mission to be your servant we will need to move. And the landlord, with or without the Hokage's consent, will not allow us to leave while things are like this," she said motioning to the empty Ramen cups and the myriad of different kinds of trash.
He didn't like it, but he nodded. She was right. The last time he cleaned was for a party that had lasted nearly seven hours causing a much bigger mess, which he didn't both cleaning up. Naruto still found party hats among some of the other piles of junk.
"Fine. But we'll need some stuff…I don't know if soap and wood polish expires, so…" he trailed off. Yui nodded.
When they finished she went back to Naruto's bedroom and pulled out a pen and a scroll. She called him in and he sat down in a chair backwards. "All right. We will need a new box," she looked back into the living room where Ko-chan was staring straight ahead. "A few new boxes of trash bags. Some wood polish. Paper towels, liquid cleaner…do you have tile cleaner?" Naruto dashed to his bathroom and looked under the sink. When he came back he shook his head. She sighed. "Tile cleaner, glass cleaner. Since we're buying so much we should also buy normal food." She blushed and looked away from him, "How long will it take for you to decide whether you wish to stay with me?" she asked. He raised an eyebrow; "It would be better if we only got what we needed for those days so nothing gets messed up if we do move…"
"I've already decided Yui-chan," Naruto smirked. She whipped her head up at him. The smile on her face was ten times as beautiful as the rest of her. "We'll go and get the stuff and bring it here, eat lunch then head out and tell Tsunade-bachan you're going to be my…" he looked at her and tried to think of a better word.
"Your retainer."
"eh?"
"Retainer. Daimyos have samurai and ninja warriors who are not only their guardians but also their friends, advisors and servants. I will gladly be your retainer Naruto-kun…but may I please show you the proper respect?" she asked.
"Proper respect meaning?"
"Uzumaki-sama."
"No…Naruto-kun."
"Naruto-sama?" she asked. He blinked at her. He knew that look on her face. It showed she had made up her mind. He laughed and nodded. She smiled and stood up. "Very well! Now let me get dressed." Naruto nodded. He realized too late she had taken off the shirt she borrowed. He grabbed his nose and turned away. "What's wrong Naruto-sama?"
"Y-You're changing in front of me!" he gasped trying to keep his blood in.
"Yes. You've seen naked women before correct? I saw the magazines under your mattress this morning. I am just another woman." She was very close.
"That-that's…It's different! We're going to be living together!"
"Yes. And?" she asked.
Naruto looked at her to show how amazed and distraught he was then realized his mistake and turned back quickly. Oh my god…they're so big…NO! BAD NARUTO! No looking at Yui-chan's breasts! Or butt! Or…DAMMIT!
"Please understand me Naruto-sama. I will give everything to you at a moments notice. And that includes my body. I do not understand why you are so hesitant to look at me. Am I that unattractive to you?"
He grumbled and stood up straight. "Of-of course not Yui-chan. It's…it's just not…it doesn't feel right! I don't want to be like Ero-Sannin!"
Yui smiled and bit her lip. She took hold of him and turned his body. He groaned and covered his eyes. She held them. "If you were like Jiraya-sama you would have helped me take my shirt off." He blushed and nodded her point. "Please look. I do not wish to hold any secrets from you."
"I don't want to keep any secrets from you, but this is different! I mean there could be a time when something happens and we can't control ourselves! It would be too weird to see you like that! I can live fine without knowing about your private areas!"
"This is a secret. Some women believe the biggest. Some believe it is the smallest, in any case I want to share it and all my others with you. So look."
Naruto sighed her voice was forceful, she wasn't going to let him out of this room until he saw her in her birthday suit. He closed his eyes and let his hands drop. When he opened them she stood before him, bare. She had a slight blush on her face with her hands clasped behind her plump rear. Naruto looked at her from the spikey hair that jutted from the crown of her head, to her lightly painted toes.
He noticed her breasts right away, he has been living under Tsunade for the last six years after all. At first his mind screamed at him for being like his sensei, before he realized he was admiring the healthy change in her shape. When he had first seen her she was akin to Sakura's body type, very thin in the athletic sense. He understood some of girls he knew did breast binding (when in truth all of the kunoichi he knew did it except for Sakura) but he had never seen the drastic effect it had.
The wide curve of her thighs made him wonder if she bound that area as well. In fact it made him think how an obviously well trained ninja could have such an area of her body like that. The answer came as he thought of Chouji's cousin. She was a big girl, not fat just big, and she trained frequently and she was still like that. It was because of her genes.
The thought of Yui's mother in her prime filled his head.
He gulped and turned away from her has his eyes lingered to the small fuzz at where her thighs met her body. From the round shape it reminded him of a newborn chick's first feathers, yellow and fuzzy. Movement caught his eye and he watched her lift her arms to show bare under arms. He gulped again as he saw her muscles contract and bend.
Naruto was amazed at her body. She was almost exactly like Naru-chan (2). But he didn't feel any sexual frustration or discomfort. In fact he felt at peace seeing her as she was. "You're beautiful Yui-chan." She smiled and lowered her arms. She spread her legs allowing Naruto to see a little peak of hair, put her hand on her hip and pointed at him. "What? What is it?"
"Your turn Naruto-sama."
Naruto blinked and went squint (3).
"WHAT?!"
She couldn't help but smile evilly and giggle, "Let me see your private area."
Naruto was so embarrassed when they left he wouldn't even let Yui carry the small sponges she bought. He wanted a very thick and very opaque wall between her and his crotch. It wasn't the fact she had seen him naked, it was how she reacted. Naruto had always been very shy about himself, especially when he was younger and had the horrible combination of a skinny body and baby fat face.
The fact Yui had not stopped glancing toward him made him nervous.
Yui herself was going over size estimations. The male sexual organ increases in length an average of one fourth to one half of its un-aroused state's length during arousal. So if Naruto-sama is…
The squeaking sound that Yui kept making while she did calculation motions in the air didn't ebb the flow of Naruto's fear. It was almost as bad when Tsunade had examined him after a long battle. She had made him strip to his underwear and finally made him take his boxers off
When she did she looked at it for a full five minutes before pulling a sake bottle from her coat sleeve and took a long drink straight from the bottle itself.
Maybe there's something wrong with me. I knew the Kyuubi made me weird down there…I mean Kiba and Neji didn't speak to me for a week after they saw it at the spa that one time. God I'm more of a freak than I thought.
"Naruto-sama. We've gotten everything," he heard Yui say.
"Huh? Oh good. Hey why are we at the bank?" he asked looking at her.
"I want to transfer my money into your account." He went squint. She laughed, "If we're going to live together it is only right we pay for things equally. Besides I don't have much."
Naruto looked at her around a bag of vegetables. "Keep some for yourself Yui-chan. I never keep all my money in one place. Ero-Sannin always tries to get it for whores and booze and gambling."
She nodded, "Yes Joya–sensei nearly went to the Hidden Stone when he left us with a twenty thousand ryou bill at his hotel. He is a good ninja isn't he?"
"He's a good pervert, a good idiot, and maybe a good ninja," Naruto scoffed as they walked in. The guard looked from Naruto to Yui. He wiped his eyes then did it again.
"You have a sister?" he asked.
Naruto, who didn't really like the guard since the time he had thrown Naruto out for accidentally wasting all the ink in one pen, grabbed Yui around the waist and made a very lewd movement of his hand. "Yeah my long lost sister." He walked by the gaping guard.
Naruto set the things down beside the cart he had brought for the bigger things and went to sign a transfer document. "Oh hey Naruto," he looked up and saw Tenten. "Is this who I think it is?" she asked walking up to him. She looked at Yui who glanced at Naruto.
"So Sakura-chan and Ino spread the word fast huh?" he laughed ad rubbed the back of his head. Tenten nodded. "Yui-chan this is an old friend of mine Tenten, Tenten this is Yui-chan she's my…uh what was it?"
"I'm Naruto-sama's retainer. It is a pleasure to meet the Weapons mistress of Konoha," she took Tenten's hand and bowed. Tenten smiled and did the same.
"She looks so much like you Naruto…no wait…she doesn't…" Tenten looked her over. She saw exactly what Shizune saw. Naruto was very masculine while Yui was very feminine. Naruto towered over Tenten, by at least three inches, and Yui only just met her height. "So why are you here?"
"I am transferring my money into Naruto-sama's account. By the order of Hokage-sama we are to live together as master and servant." Tenten saw Naruto wince at the words 'master and servant.'
"I'm jealous!" she said laughing. "Well I'd better get going I just came to drop off something for Lee. I swear if the boy had as much brains as he did eyebrows this world would be a better place."
"Yeah but would it be as youthful?" Naruto asked. The two kept their faces straight for a few seconds before laughing hard. Yui smiled, sadly, because she did not know the joke.
"That is a good one. Yui-chan I hope to see you around the village. Maybe we can train sometime. If you're as strong as you look I could finally get a work out!" she turned and waved as she left.
Naruto and Yui went back to their work, neither of them thinking about who Tenten was jealous of.
Naruto was expecting Tsunade to be happy he and Yui would take the mission. They had returned home and organized the cleaning and foodstuffs before heading out to the Hokage Tower and to get some dango. When he heard her yelling and the sound of breaking glass he wondered if they would wait until she was piss herself drunk.
"YOU DID NOT JUST TOUCH ME THERE!" he heard Tsunade scream. "THAT IS A PRIVATE AREA!"
"YOU SAY THAT NOW!" he heard Joya retort. A sound of pure rage echoed through the building. Yui grabbed Naruto's arm and pulled him away from the doors as a small desk was thrown through them.
"I'LL KILL YOU!" Tsunade bellowed.
Joya dashed out of the room, waving to Naruto and Yui before a rampaging Tsunade followed after her. She screamed as she reached out making neck-wrenching motions.
"Hello Naruto-kun, Yui-san," Shizune said appearing from the doors. A large bruise was forming on her face and she was treating it with her own hand. She saw Naruto's shocked face. "Oh! Never mind this I'll have it healed in a minute or two."
"Yeah…what happened Shizune-neechan?" Naruto asked looking at the divots made by Tsunade's feet.
Shizune sighed, "You see Joya-san decided it would be amusing to bring up somewhat awkward moments in Tsunade-sama's youth…then she proceeded to molest Tsunade-sama…also Tsunade-sama has been drinking since seven this morning."
"Oh…yeah that will do it. Uh…we came to accept the mission?" asked Naruto, who was so freaked out of his mind he could barely understand what Shizune had just said.
"That's good. We can do the paperwork here. Tsunade-sama instructed me to find you both a suitable apartment for your needs. I have a few here." By now her bruise was healed and she was calmer.
She revealed the different apartments and Naruto looked at them. They were good ones. Some were very large with a full bath and kitchen with an island. He actually saw a house of two. It was amazing they had houses this cheap in Konoha. He guessed when the Hokage ordered something Konoha would get it done. But he noticed something in all of them.
"Shizune-neechan?" he asked.
"Yes Naruto-kun?"
"Why do all of these only have one bedroom?"
"Ah…yes…well it appears Tsunade-sama was very drunk when she wrote the kinds of homes you two could have. I'm sorry to say no other multi bedrooms are available at this time. Maybe in a few weeks?" she asked smiling apologetically.
"This is fine. Naruto-sama I do not mind sleeping on a futon," Yui said.
"Ah Yui-chan…I can't let you do that!" he said as he looked at her.
Shizune had an idea, "Why don't you two share a room? I'm sure you could get two beds into…" she looked through them, "this one here. And if not a large bed with enough room for both of you."
Naruto looked from Shizune to Yui. The two blondes seemed to have a conversation in the minute they regarded each other. "Is that okay with you?"
"Only if it is with you Naruto-sama." Naruto moaned and ran his fingers through his hair. "what's wrong?" she asked.
"Well it's hard making decisions for another person…especially…"
She put a hand on his back and smiled serenely, "Naruto-sama remember the ramen?" He looked at her and let his arms rest on his legs and his hands dangle between his knees. He smiled.
"Yeah…we'll take it Shizune-neechan."
She chirped happily and clapped her hands. "Then both of you please sign here. Put the account number for your bank here. Your Shinobi authentication numbers here, Yui-chan yours is the same as the Mist. Yui-chan, you'll be inducted officially into the Konoha ranks in a matter of days." She waited until they had finished before adding her own signature and checking a few of the forms. "That's good as soon as-"
"Mune-hime why can't you see I love you!" Joya ran past with Tsunade hot on her heels.
"BECAUSE I WANT TO KILL YOU!"
The three occupants of her office winced as an explosion rocked the hallway. Joya ran the other way, her clothes singed. Tsunade was again right after her, small fires in her hair and her make up smeared.
"As soon as Tsunade-sama gives her official seal you'll be able to move in. that…" she checked again. "Is all. I'm glad I met you Yui-chan, and your beautiful thighs…" she mumbled.
"What was that Shizune-neechan?" Naruto asked.
"HUH! Nothing! NOTHING AT ALL!" she screamed. When Tsunade and Joya went by again Shizune ordained now would be a good time to follow them.
"We may want to take the window…"
"I agree Naruto-sama…"
Sakura looked at Tenten like she was insane. "He said so?"
"Yep! I guess he decided to let her take the mission. One night huh? It seems she was very influential."
The five young kunoichi, all three Rookie 9 girls plus Tenten and Temari, were sitting around a small table in a dango shop. Tenten had described the events at the bank. When she mentioned not only the acceptance of the deal, but how Naruto annoyed the guard she watched Sakura and Ino tense up.
"That little hussy!" Ino snarled. "I bet she was influential! Something tells me Naruto got a better look at her private areas than the complications this is gonna cause him!"
"Private areas?" Temari asked.
"What? It's better than saying she convinced him by showing him her cu-"
"ANYWAY!" Sakura said cutting in, "can we agree it is not a good idea for Naruto of all people to be living with a Mist Ninja he barely knows who could be trying to find a away to convert him to their side?"
Temari rolled her eyes as she drank her tea. "You two are so paranoid," she said as she set the cup down. "I swear. Last week it was the Ramen Bar girl."
"What do you mean?" Ino asked.
"If I recall you said," Temari tapped her throat and mimicked Ino's voice perfectly, "'That little ho is seducing him with aphrodisiacs in his Ramen.'"
"And you," Tenten said pointing at Sakura, "said," she tapped her throat as well, "'She's only doing it because he got that inheritance from his uncle.'"
"A-and to-together both of you said," Hinata took a deep breath, "'Gold digging skank.'" Tamari and Tenten clapped at the wonderful copy of both girls' voices.
"ARE YOU SUGGESTING SOMETHING!" Sakura screamed.
Temari sighed, "Yes, we're suggesting you're angry Naruto won't be chasing your private areas anymore when he has easy access at his home. In the words of my brother Kankuro 'booty on tap.' Even men like Naruto prefer the quick way to the expensive and most likely waste of time way."
Sakura held her head as if it was going to split, "Please never say that again."
"What? The booty on tap or private areas?" Temari smiled.
"Wise ass," Sakura hissed.
"Who is?" they heard. All five girls looked up to see Naruto, Yui to his right and behind him. He smiled at them; she did the same and bowed her head. "Hey girls. How are you? Ah Tenten didn't think I'd see you again so soon…" he suddenly got a thought. "Are you all talking about us?" he asked motioning to him and Yui.
Sakura did not like how he said us.
"Naruto, why would we be talking about you two?" Ino asked, scoffing.
"Because you want to bump private areas," Temari whispered under her tea. Ino shot her the deadliest glare she had.
"We only came here to get a snack before we start cleaning up my apartment anyway," Naruto said with a shrug.
"Why are you cleaning? Gonna have a party?" Tenten asked, generally interested. As a rule Naruto's parties were the best because he didn't care what happened to the place.
"No me and Yui-chan are moving into a new place and I found out I can still get my cleaning deposit back."
Sakura's eye twitched not unlike her master's, "Where are you…" she had to spit it out, "two…going to move to?"
"This big place on…where was it Yui-chan?"
She pulled a small scroll with all the information on it from her purse and looked. "A two story house on Yoko Street."
Ino twitched. "Yoko street?" she asked.
"Yes."
"Two story?"
"Yes."
"Rooftop garden?"
Yui checked the plans she had, "Yes."
"You know the place Ino?" Naruto asked.
She dropped her head. "It's right next door to my house."
Temari and Tenten snorted. Sakura did a double take from her to Yui to Naruto and kept repeating it like a broken record. Hinata blushed deeply and seemed to shrink into a small ball.
"Uh…yay…" Naruto chuckled weakly.
Ino's head shot up. "What's with that? You don't want me for a neighbor dobe?" she asked.
He grunted and looked at her, "It's not that…it…ah never mind. Come on Yui-chan our stuff is up. Good to see you Hinata, Temari." He turned his back on them. Yui gave them a pert bow and left with him.
After they left Ino and Sakura clenched their fists. "WHAT NERVE!" Sakura roared.
"I know!" Ino hissed back.
"That attitude she had when she answered your questions!"
"She's so damn smug!"
"I'd like to see how smug she is after a few chakra powered punches to the face."
"Little bitch should learn her place."
"I think the fact she calls herself Naruto's retainer says she already has," Temari added. The two glared at her. "Oh get off of it. You two are just mad someone is closer to Naruto than you. Get over it. If you two forgot I nearly dated him."
They looked at each other then her. It took a few seconds but soon they were whispering about her too. Temari threw her hands up in defeat and left some change on the table. "You two are hopeless. I hope Naruto smacks some sense into you, even if he has to take you over his knees and spank you." With that Temari left.
"I'd like Naruto to spank me…" Tenten said absentmindedly. She laughed wholeheartedly at Ino and Sakura's reactions and left, paying for her untouched drink and sweets.
"We'll get her…" Ino sneered.
"She'll see what we can do…" Sakura seconded.
Hinata tried desperately to get the image of Naruto disciplining her friends out of her mind. Go to happy place! Go to happy place!
I think we all know what Hinata's happy place would be, Have you been a bad girl Hinata-chan?
"YES I HAVE NARUTO-KUN!" she screamed. Sakura and Ino cringed away from her. She looked around and realized the entire shop was looking at her like she was insane. She giggled softly and hurried home.
She had an urgent meeting with her private areas.
Naruto sneezed hard; thankfully he had been wiping his mouth of dango sauce so he was able to keep it off of his food. "Someone must be talking about me," he said.
"Do you think it's bad?" Yui asked.
"In this village? Who knows? Well we've gotten the living room, the bedroom, and the hallways clean. Do you want to do the bathroom or the kitchen next?" Naruto asked. He was tired and dirty, but it was the good kind. He had a towel wrapped around his head to keep the sweaty hair out of his eyes.
Yui thought for a second. She had switched to a sports bra and a pair of baggy pants to work. By the look of them they had been in or around bleach more than Naruto's tiles. "The kitchen isn't that bad, we can save that until last. The bathroom just needs to have the floor cleaned. Since Tsunade-sama may still be chasing Joya-sensei around it could be days before we get to the new building…"
Both of them were sitting on the clean wooden floors of Naruto's living room, supported by knee cushions. Naruto had gotten two cold cans of tea from the fridge to go wit their dango and they were eating off of one of his few trays.
"So just stop for today and take all the trash and stuff out?" Naruto asked. She smiled and nodded. "Okay," he made his infamous hand sign and made seven clones. They gathered up the trash and the cleaning stuff. The trash was taken out to the dumpster and the cleaning stuff was put up for the night.
"Do you want to shower first Yui-chan?" Naruto asked.
"I want to shower with you," she said as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
Naruto, who had been moving to get up, started and fell flat on his ass. "Okay…I can handle the being naked thing…I mean that's natural curiosity and all. But bathing together? That's going into a whole different level of…what ever it is."
She blinked, "I want to shower with you because you look stiff. Joya-sensei needs to be massaged because of the drugs she uses to keep her body young. If we bathe together we can conserve water and we can help each other. I'm sure you would enjoy a good warm water massage as much as I would."
"You don't get why I don't want to do that do you?' he asked.
"I don't understand why you are so hesitant no," admitted his counterpart.
"Okay…listen. I'm not that experienced with girls. Kaka-sensei tells me all the time to go slow and not expect things until they've been together a while."
Yui nodded. She understood why Naruto said it. He was obviously very concerned about doing something to offend or upset her. She felt her heart swell. He was thinking of how she would react first. Like when she had asked him to view her.
"We have been together for a long time. Ever since we were children," she countered.
Naruto had no rebuttal for that. "Well…are you sure? I mean…"
"I'm sure. Let's hurry I must smell horrible to you. Your stench isn't helping my nose either," she laughed.
"That's because some of us can't just shave ourselves clean everyday!" he grunted.
"I'll do it for you if you wish me to."
"Ugh have you ever heard of personal space?"
"Yes I have. I also hear it is horrible for people who wish to know each other."
"And I thought I was a smart ass."
"No you're just a cute ass."
Naruto laughed and took off the towel on his head and dropped his headband onto it. His shirt followed then the slippers he wore when inside and his pants. He hesitated at his boxers until he saw Yui bend over and take off her panties. He sighed and did the same.
No going back now Naruto, you asked for it.
He heard the water kick on and waited until Yui called him. He watched as she motioned to the tub. He blushed and sat down. When he felt her hands slide over his shoulders he tensed, but it was nothing compared to the feeling of the water rising from her entering.
Her simple commands to move his body felt right to his ears. It was like he had been hearing them his entire life. He had never felt more willing to do what he was told. It was nothing compared to Iruka, or Kaka-sensei, or even Jiraya. It was something else, deeper within him, which made him obey completely.
The wash cloth she was using felt good as it moved in small spiraling motions over his back. He was only going to let her to that, but when she moved to his sides and his legs he turned to her and let her clean the rest. She stopped at his private area, but he shrugged and reached for the cloth. She pulled back and did it herself.
He pulled a clean cloth from the rack over his toilet and went to work on her. She held out her arms for him to clean and then her legs. At first she thought he wouldn't clean that far down, especially close to her own private area, but the struggle she had shown was nowhere in Naruto's eyes.
She felt so comfortable in his grip it was odd. Even around Joya she had tensed up when exposed to this degree. She had never felt safe even with her mother's home when she was alive. Now, in an enemy village, in the slum areas of said village, with no weapons in range and only her skin to protect her, she felt safe. Because her skin wasn't alone, she also had him.
When they finished Naruto and Yui dried themselves off. They walked from the bathroom, both naked as can be, their bare feet padding against the wooden floor. Like it had been going on for years the both pulled their clothes from his dresser. She took another of his shirts, this time it was so big for her he had to help her put it on, along with a pair of her own panties.
Naruto himself threw on a pair of boxers and some pajama pants. Yui got into bed and looked at him was he headed for the couch. "Sleep here Naruto-sama."
He turned his eyes to her, "Now who's giving orders Yui-chan?" she mumbled sorry but he patted her on the head to show it was all in jest. He yawned and sat on the other side. When he laid down he saw she was moving with him to pull the covers up.
Ko-chan was sitting against the wall between them. Yui pulled her favorite old doll into her arms and smiled at Naruto who returned it. She turned her back to him and scooted over to him. Instinctively he wrapped his arms around her as she squeezed the doll.
It just felt right to be with her.
If just felt right to be with him.
Both Naruto and Yui fell asleep quietly.
"YOU HORRIBLE WHORE!" Tsunade screeched. She had finally cornered Joya at her house. Tsunade was panting badly. She was tired, hungry, sweaty, and above all alcohol free. "I'M GOING TO SKIN YOU ALIVE!"
Tsunade needed her medicine.
"Listen Tsunade! Let's examine this situation for another angle!" a kunai buried itself hilt deep into the wall by Joya's head. She looked from it to Tsunade.
"A kunai perpendicular to your forehead would be nice!" Tsunade snarled.
Joya gulped. She had never been given a Mist Headband and ANBU didn't wear theirs under their masks so she hadn't seen it in over twenty years. She had no way of stopping Tsunade.
Unless…yes her final technique.
It would be dangerous. She would most likely suffer for it physically, but she had no choice. It was stop Tsunade, her better in not only physical form but also battle, or die. Joya didn't want to die to someone she called Mune-hime since they were kids. It didn't feel right.
As Tsunade struck Joya reached into her cleavage, which was like a crack in the sidewalk compared to her enemy, but hey she had it, and revealed a small bottle. It had a purple cork and had plum designs coating it. Tsunade skidded to a stop, her fist millimeters from Joya's nose.
"Is…is that the rare Roshumon Plum Sake?"
"The kind they only make two of every two years? Yes. Yes it is. If you hit me now…I'll drop it. But if you let me live. I may…give it to you," Joya said shaking it a little. Tsunade's hand shook. She heard the sloshing of the liquid and smelled it delicious scent.
"FINE! GIMMIE!" Tsunade said. Joya, who was close to Naruto's height, and thus much taller than Tsunade, held it over her head. "NO! I WON'T HIT YOU! I PROMISE TO NEVER HIT YOU AGAIN!"
"Swear?" Joya watched as Tsunade jumped for it. She was kind of amused the Tsunade had forgotten she was a ninja and could just leap ten feet into the air to get it.
Jump, "I NEVER GO BACK ON MY WORD!"
She watched the movements of Tsunade's body happily, "Let me stay in your house?"
Jump, "YES!"
She kept the gravy train, and Tsunade, moving, "Share a bed with my beautiful Mune-hime!"
Jump, "WHATEVER!"
One more time, "Want pizza tonight?"
Jump, "SURE!"
Okay, one more time, "Can I squeeze your ass anytime I want?"
Jump, "FINE!"
"SOLD! To the woman in the big hat!" Joya said as she gave Tsunade the bottle. The Hokage rubbed it with her cheek, she didn't even notice Joya's hand as they headed back inside. "What's the best pizza place in Konoha Muni-hime?" Joya asked.
"I don't care," she sighed happily.
Joya looked at her and took her hand away. She put it around Tsunade's shoulders and laughed, "of course you don't."
The two old women walked inside to enjoy their liquor and pizza.
A/N: oooh...Plum Sake...Anyway: I'm sure all can see where this is going. Can you say: teen girl angst?
Dictionary:
1 (Private Areas): if this chapter wasn't proof enough, I love this phrase and will be using it. A lot. A whle lot.
2 (Naru-Chan): Sexy No Jutsu Naruto basically
3 (Going Squint): Whne Naruto closes his eyes and acts either stupid or over the top, mostly how he acts in the first few chapters and episodes.