The scene before Talia's eyes seemed to glitter under the light of the crystal chandeliers, reflecting light onto each face as they lazily chatted with one another. The table was littered with empty plates and the remnants of a full course dinner, with glasses of half-drunk wine scattered along its length. After a full meal, her nobles seemed less agitated. And the addition of the vibrant Siala to the group did much to lighten the mood and raise spirits. She had kept Lord Howard laughing near to tears with her anecdotes of life on Coruscant with the diplomats and Senators. For her part, Talia felt an unexpected wave of calm wash over her as she surveyed the dinner party. She smoothed her soft white dress with her hands, folding them in her lap.
I suppose it's ridiculous for me to feel so content, she thought with a half-smile, considering that the world is crashing down around us.
From across the table, she caught Kavar's steady gaze, as he watched her with an openly tender expression. He was about to turn his head away when Talia surprised him by fully meeting his eyes. Nervously, she held the connection. She noted his look of soft surprise before she finally turned away. Siala, who was seated next to Talia, noticed the exchange, saying in a low voice,
"There. You can't deny that he was looking at you, then. He's been watching you all through dinner. Perhaps he doesn't have as much self-control as he'd like to think."
"Oh, shush," Talia said, as a girlish giggle escaped her lips, unbidden.
At length, the talk at the table wound to an end, and Siala stood to make the customary toast, expected of the guest of honor.
"I'm honored to be with you this evening, my friends," began Siala in a ringing voice. "It has been a long time since I've had such a pleasant gathering. On Coruscant, you're lucky if you get a glass of old ale and a handshake for your trouble," she said, to much laughter from the tipsy nobles. More seriously, she continued. "Good company is hard to come by these days. It seems that everywhere you look, chaos reigns. I've seen it with my own eyes, in all parts of the galaxy. The Telos Restoration efforts are constantly thwarted, the Senators bicker while our great Republic crumbles, and here, Vaklu spreads his lies thickly, stirring our city to war." There was a somber silence at these dark reminders. Siala looked around the table, her eyes finally resting on Talia. "But there is always hope. These trials; they are shadows only, shadows that will eventually fall in the face of goodness and loyalty. Our greatest hope, dear friends, is in facing these shadows together, armed with bravery, good will, and of course, good wine." Her eyes twinkled, and a ripple of laughter moved through her spellbound audience. "I ask you to raise your glasses now, in honor of those things, places, and people that we love. May we always fight hard to preserve them."
At the end of her speech, the group stood, raising their glasses aloft. Several of the older nobles had tears glistening in their eyes. Many replied with a resounding "hear hear!" before taking a sip. Kavar regarded Talia curiously, and they shared a smile before tipping back their cups.
The dishes were cleared away by bustling servants, and the drowsy nobles slowly began to leave, some still lingering to talk and say goodnight. Kavar excused himself early, exiting the room. Talia stayed behind with Siala for a while, basking in the glow of good conversation. After an hour, the two sisters departed for their rooms.
Talia lay in bed later that night, unable to sleep. It was a fairly common occurrence now, but she couldn't quite pin her finger on the reason this time. It was quite hot, even stifling, in her room, and she threw the covers off in frustration.
She watched the shadows on her floor dance, and Talia began to feel uneasy. Sitting up suddenly, she looked around the dark room, half-expecting another assassin to burst from the shadows. Realizing that it was only the ventilation shaft kicking in and rustling her drapes, she laid down again, still restless.
I might as well go walk around the Palace for a bit, she thought to herself. It can't hurt.
Grabbing a cover for her thin sleep gown, the Queen opened the door of her chambers and silently tiptoed through the hallways. She was amused to see that many of her guards had fallen asleep where they stood, or that they barely noticed her quiet footsteps.
She had wandered only a few meters when she passed the door to the Palace Library. To her surprise, the door had been opened, and a dim light emanated from within. Stopping, Talia entered to find Kavar on the other side of the room, poring over an ancient tablet of writings. She stood in the doorway, considering what to do, when Kavar suddenly looked up. Startled, she moved to leave him to his studies, but not before the Jedi Master had risen from his seat and said in a gentle voice,
"Wait; don't leave."
Talia turned around slowly. She crossed the room to where he stood.
"You can't sleep either?" Kavar said dryly.
Talia nodded, looking down at Kavar's reading material with interest. A strand of black hair fell in her face, and she pushed it away.
"What are you looking at?"
Kavar sighed, handing her the tablet.
"Writings on the history and culture of Onderon. In particular, I was interested in learning more about your family's past."
"I'm afraid there's not much you don't already know," she said with a faint smile. "All our history shows is a propensity for Sith Lords and rebellion."
There was a weighty silence between them as Talia moved to a row of shelves lining the library, examining some of the titles with feigned interest. She tried to summon the courage to say what was on her mind.
"Besides," she said suddenly, "You won't be here for much longer, you don't need to bother."
Kavar looked up at her, confused.
"I was only interested," he said in a quiet voice.
Talia lifted her chin with an air of slight defiance.
"Why?" she asked, daring him to explain further. Intrigued now, Kavar stood up and crossed over to where she stood by the shelves. He searched her eyes, finally saying in a reluctant tone,
"You know why. I… well, even with our earlier discussion, it appears that I'm unable to halt my… curiosity. Old habits die hard, I suppose."
Talia scanned the aisles, avoiding his eyes as she took a deep breath.
"Then why don't you stay?"
Kavar leaned back against the shelf, surveying the young Queen.
"Now that's not exactly fair, your majesty. I already answered a question. I believe it's my turn."
"You can ask me anything," Talia said.
Kavar leaned in slightly, standing directly before her. Her heart fluttered wildly.
"Why are you asking?" he said softly.
Siala's words from earlier echoed inside Talia's head.
You could try.
"Because I've loved you since first I saw you. I knew it was impossible, but it didn't make a difference. I can't help it. I loved you then, and I love you still. I don't know what… what I'll do if you leave, again," she said, in broken tones. She met his eyes at last, flicking upwards to watch his reaction.
Kavar was stunned. A look of intense joy mingled with pain crossed his face, as he turned away anxiously.
"You didn't say anything before, when…"
"I didn't say anything," Talia interrupted, "because I thought it would be for the best."
"And it is," said Kavar darkly. "I can't simply abandon the Jedi. I can't stay with you."
"Or what?" Talia said, growing frustrated. "The galaxy will break apart? From where I'm standing, it already has. Vaklu is going to make a move soon, I can feel it. We could both die in this civil war he wants. And what then?"
"I don't know," said Kavar, running his hands through his hair in agitation. "All I know is that these… feelings are dangerous. I can't change the Code."
"Then perhaps the Code is flawed, Kavar," Talia said gently. "I've torn my hair out about it for the past week, but I think I understand now, at long last. Yes, there is a darker side to love. But it is also the root of all goodness, sacrifice, and true redemption. That fact is the only thing keeping this fragile universe together."
Kavar paused, regarding her with a thoughtful look.
"Even if that were true, I would feel selfish, allowing myself so much happiness."
This time, it was Talia who leaned in close, reaching up to caress his face with her delicate hand.
"Stay with me," she whispered softly. "Stay here. You've wandered long enough. Isn't it time you allowed yourself a little hope?"
"Talia…" he breathed out her name in feeble protest. But Talia pulled him closer, wrapping her arms around his neck. Kavar's body stiffened, and then suddenly relaxed as he bent to kiss her tenderly. Their lips met and locked for a moment, gently melting into passionate urgency. He carefully pressed her against the shelf behind them, his hands moving to feel the curves hiding beneath her sheer nightgown as they kissed.
Dizzy with delight, Talia slowly raised her head, looking into his eyes.
"There," she said with a small laugh. "That wasn't so difficult."
A warm smile broke over Kavar's face, and Talia grasped his hand tightly in hers.
"Come with me," she said, as they walked together down the hallway to Talia's chambers, fingers intertwined.