Chapter 3
Jason's attention while being captivated by the journals did not distract him as it did Brenda. He heard her footsteps approach the door, he wondered if he should rush and throw the book back in the box. But he resisted the urge and instead simply waited for her.
"Feeling better?" he said before she even got all the way through the door
She smiled at him, a sad, fake smile. "Yea thanks, it's just the whole death nothingness kinda gets to a dying person. What's that?" she said looking at the notebook
"They're his journals. I'm guessing no one ever realized what they were besides Reginald."
Brenda smiled "Jason was entirely too smart for that family." She started looked at the stairs and then back at him. "I'm really tired I'm going to go to bed."
He saw the look in her eyes and they gave her emotions away; she was upset again. "Don't Brenda, don't run off every time you get upset."
She turned to face him "I'm not upset, I'm tired"
"Brenda, just talk to me. I've been told I'm a good listener."
"So was he, of course he spoke back at the end."
"I'll try my best Brenda. Now will you just tell me what exactly is wrong? I don't feel like living with you"
She cut him off "Fine Jason, would you like me to move out? Would you like this to be over now? What the hell was so"
"Brenda" he said in almost a shout "Just tell me."
"I'm scared okay?" She shook her head "I am just insanely scared, I'm not ready to die, I'm especially not ready to die like this. I saw that picture today and I ...I don't know I got scared. I mean is Jason in heaven or is he just over. Then it got worse than that, it got even more selfish because I missed him. I missed how he made me feel. I missed how I could talk to him for hours. I mean we never really were great friends, sure we hung out with the whole group, but we wouldn't pair off on our own generally. Every once in awhile though, he and I would just hang out for weeks and then it would taper off. We went shopping together, I'd help him pick out little trinkets for Keesha and he'd listen to me flip out over Sonny. And he just made everything seem okay and not so scary and I just really could use a friend right now okay?"
"He loved you Bren, he really did care. It's all throughout this thing."
She smiled at him "You called me Bren, you almost never call me that."
"Blame it on him" Jason said lifting up the book
"Read me one" she said sitting down on the couch opposite of him
"Read me one, you have his voice...it'll almost be like he's here."
Brenda's eyes pleaded with him to say yes and he couldn't resist, when she wasn't be loud or self-centered, she almost seemed decent. He flipped for awhile and found one he had already read and that he had laughed to.
"Living with Brenda is going to drive me insane." Jason looked up to see Brenda frowning and smiled as he went on "She keeps walking around the house in a long tee shirt at night. It only covers her ass ... okay mid thigh, but still, it's going to drive me insane. And then she knocks on my door at three in the morning; she walks me up in her short ass shirt, her hair in a curly mess and not a single drop of makeup on her face. And she wants to talk. All I ever can think about is throwing her to my bed and she's talking about Sonny. Like I said living with her is going to drive me completely insane one of these days especially when she starts with "You're such a nice guy Jase, why can't I meet a guy like you?" God I'm going to kill her one of these days."
Jason looked up to find Brenda smiling "And here I was thinking he was a saint."
"You knew?"
"Oh yea, every once in awhile I'd catch him starring at my legs, he was always so good at diverting his eyes from my chest...Because well you can't very well wear a bra to bed, that wouldn't be very comfortable and do you have any idea how many white tee shirts there are in the world."
Brenda laughed as she saw Jason's face "What, it's not like he didn't do it back?" She jumped up to her feet "Bren, red or blue" she made a moving of the clothing gestures "Jeans or khakis." She laughed "And dear god Jason's body" then she stopped and laughed some more "Is the same body you have now, so I'm going to stop myself."
She started to walk away, but then she stopped herself "Thank you Jason."
"You're welcome. Good night Bren."
"I really do like that, it just feels good. Good night Jase."
****Will someone please tell me how to do italics on this site ... Please!
Jason's attention while being captivated by the journals did not distract him as it did Brenda. He heard her footsteps approach the door, he wondered if he should rush and throw the book back in the box. But he resisted the urge and instead simply waited for her.
"Feeling better?" he said before she even got all the way through the door
She smiled at him, a sad, fake smile. "Yea thanks, it's just the whole death nothingness kinda gets to a dying person. What's that?" she said looking at the notebook
"They're his journals. I'm guessing no one ever realized what they were besides Reginald."
Brenda smiled "Jason was entirely too smart for that family." She started looked at the stairs and then back at him. "I'm really tired I'm going to go to bed."
He saw the look in her eyes and they gave her emotions away; she was upset again. "Don't Brenda, don't run off every time you get upset."
She turned to face him "I'm not upset, I'm tired"
"Brenda, just talk to me. I've been told I'm a good listener."
"So was he, of course he spoke back at the end."
"I'll try my best Brenda. Now will you just tell me what exactly is wrong? I don't feel like living with you"
She cut him off "Fine Jason, would you like me to move out? Would you like this to be over now? What the hell was so"
"Brenda" he said in almost a shout "Just tell me."
"I'm scared okay?" She shook her head "I am just insanely scared, I'm not ready to die, I'm especially not ready to die like this. I saw that picture today and I ...I don't know I got scared. I mean is Jason in heaven or is he just over. Then it got worse than that, it got even more selfish because I missed him. I missed how he made me feel. I missed how I could talk to him for hours. I mean we never really were great friends, sure we hung out with the whole group, but we wouldn't pair off on our own generally. Every once in awhile though, he and I would just hang out for weeks and then it would taper off. We went shopping together, I'd help him pick out little trinkets for Keesha and he'd listen to me flip out over Sonny. And he just made everything seem okay and not so scary and I just really could use a friend right now okay?"
"He loved you Bren, he really did care. It's all throughout this thing."
She smiled at him "You called me Bren, you almost never call me that."
"Blame it on him" Jason said lifting up the book
"Read me one" she said sitting down on the couch opposite of him
"Read me one, you have his voice...it'll almost be like he's here."
Brenda's eyes pleaded with him to say yes and he couldn't resist, when she wasn't be loud or self-centered, she almost seemed decent. He flipped for awhile and found one he had already read and that he had laughed to.
"Living with Brenda is going to drive me insane." Jason looked up to see Brenda frowning and smiled as he went on "She keeps walking around the house in a long tee shirt at night. It only covers her ass ... okay mid thigh, but still, it's going to drive me insane. And then she knocks on my door at three in the morning; she walks me up in her short ass shirt, her hair in a curly mess and not a single drop of makeup on her face. And she wants to talk. All I ever can think about is throwing her to my bed and she's talking about Sonny. Like I said living with her is going to drive me completely insane one of these days especially when she starts with "You're such a nice guy Jase, why can't I meet a guy like you?" God I'm going to kill her one of these days."
Jason looked up to find Brenda smiling "And here I was thinking he was a saint."
"You knew?"
"Oh yea, every once in awhile I'd catch him starring at my legs, he was always so good at diverting his eyes from my chest...Because well you can't very well wear a bra to bed, that wouldn't be very comfortable and do you have any idea how many white tee shirts there are in the world."
Brenda laughed as she saw Jason's face "What, it's not like he didn't do it back?" She jumped up to her feet "Bren, red or blue" she made a moving of the clothing gestures "Jeans or khakis." She laughed "And dear god Jason's body" then she stopped and laughed some more "Is the same body you have now, so I'm going to stop myself."
She started to walk away, but then she stopped herself "Thank you Jason."
"You're welcome. Good night Bren."
"I really do like that, it just feels good. Good night Jase."
****Will someone please tell me how to do italics on this site ... Please!