Thanks to shoefreak37 for muddling through my ridiculous typos and making my story better, even if she does leave gross comments about how much she loves James.

Chapter 30: Somehow We're Always Waiting

She was still looking back towards her son when she swung the door open. When Bella finally turned, she gasped, meeting a familiar pair of eyes. Standing on the other side was the one person she never thought she'd see again.

Bella felt her knees buckle as she looked at the man standing before her. A knot formed in her stomach and her hands began to shake. James looked so different from the blue-eyed boy of her past. His blond hair seemed darker, longer and shaggy. His once tanned skin was pale and washed out. And the bright blue eyes she'd loved were dull and sad, looking almost gray, likely from the dark, bruised skin beneath his eyes. He looked dejected and somber, and for a moment, Bella almost felt sorry for him.

But then the realization of the moment hit her: James was standing on her doorstep. Her instincts kicked in and she wanted to flee, to load Ben up in her car and drive away. She had to protect her son. Bella heard Edward call her name and she turned to look at him as he rose from the floor, leaning over to pick up Ben, concern evident in his eyes. When he began to move towards the door with Ben in his arms, Bella stuck out her arm in a clear message for him to stop.

"Please, just—just take him and put him in his crib and then come back," she said with a quivering voice. She saw Edward hesitate for one moment, then take another step towards her. "Please," she said again, moving into the empty space of the open door, trying to shield her son from James' view.

Bella could see the questions in Edward's eyes, the torn expression on his face, but he finally relented, carrying Ben down the hall. When he was out of sight, she turned back towards James.

"You need to leave. You have no reason to be here." Bella tried to square her shoulders, to look confident, but she could feel the tears welling in her eyes, the fear and uncertainty weighing heavily on her petite frame.

"Bella, if you'll just let me explain. I need—"

"I don't care what you need. Please leave."

A torrent of tears streamed down her cheeks and James could see her falling apart. Instinctively, he reached out to take her hand, hoping to soothe her, to persuade her to listen to what he had to say. But as soon as his fingers touched hers, she recoiled, her eyes widening in fear.

"Bella—"

"D-don't touch me," she said, wrapping her arms around her torso.

Edward appeared at that moment, his arm curling around Bella's waist. She turned and pressed herself into his side, burying her face in his chest. Looking at the man standing on the other side of the door, Edward knew that this was Ben's father. There was no other person short of her own mother that could cause this sort of reaction in Bella.

"I think you should go," Edward said, his tone calm and sure, leaving no room for argument.

"I'll be back, Bella," James said as he turned and walked away, defeat evident in his sagging shoulders.

After closing and locking the door, Edward scooped Bella up into his arms and carried her down the hallway and into the bedroom. She clung to him as he lowered her into the bed, climbing in beside her. He kissed the top of her head and rubbed her back as she continued to cry, promising her that everything would be okay. When she finally looked up at him, her eyes were swollen and her face was puffy.

"Do you think he'll really come back?" she asked, her bottom lip trembling.

Edward wanted to lie to her, to tell her that James wouldn't come anywhere near them ever again, but he knew that wasn't so. Though James had looked crushed when he turned and walked away, there was something in his demeanor that caught Edward's attention. He had the feeling that James was stubborn, that he wouldn't give up until he'd had his chance. Why else would he come all the way to Forks?

"I think he's not going to go away until you listen to what he has to say."

Bella began shaking her head, another round of tearing spilling from her eyes. "I don't—I can't. What if he wants to see Ben? Or tries to take him away?"

"Baby, he signed his rights away. He can't do that. But we're not going to know what he wants unless you talk to him."

Bella didn't want to talk anymore, didn't want to consider facing James again. She wrapped her arm around Edward's waist and pulled herself closer to him. In the months that had passed, she'd convinced herself that the only threat in her life was Renee, that if someone was going to try to cause havoc in her life, it would be her mother. She hadn't thought about James in so long, hadn't taken time to consider that he'd just show up on her doorstep out of the blue.

Though the attorney had assured them multiple times that James would have no legal rights to Ben, Bella still felt uneasy. What if there was some loophole the lawyer wasn't aware of, some way that James could reassert himself as Ben's father?

It amazed her how much things had changed in just a year. When she'd given birth, she'd wanted nothing more than for James to change his mind, to want to be a part of Ben's life. Over time, she'd grown to accept that wasn't going to happen, and with Edward in her life, she didn't want James anywhere near them.

As far as Bella was concerned, Edward was Ben's father; he filled the role in all the ways that mattered. Bella wanted him to be the only father that Ben would ever know, at least until he was old enough to make the decision for himself. She never wanted to lie to her son and Bella knew that when he was old enough to understand, she would explain the situation to him. But he was still a baby and the differences between a dad and a biological father would make no difference to him.

"Will you go get Ben?" Bella asked, wanting her son close by her side. Edward kissed her forehead before pulling away. She could hear him moving throughout the house, checking the locks and turning off lights. Bella took the time to pull off her clothes and slip into one of Edward's t-shirts, sliding her bare legs beneath the blanket.

When Edward returned, he gently placed a sleeping Ben in the middle of the bed. Ben always slept in his crib, but Bella needed him. She wanted to cuddle his chubby little body and smell his powdery baby scent. Edward joined them in the bed moments later, cupping Bella's cheek as he kissed her softly on the lips. He kissed Ben on the forehead before lying down, his arm sliding around Bella's waist as he held them both close.

~ O ~

Bella spent most of the night not sleeping, instead just lying there watching the rise and fall of Ben's chest. She rubbed his belly and kissed his cheeks, his forehead, anything to feel close to her baby. He'd grown so much; it was hard to believe that he was already almost a year old.

Ben woke up shortly after sunrise. Bella pulled on a pair of pajama pants and scooped him up from the bed, heading into the kitchen. She put him in his high chair and dropped some Cheerios on the tray, hoping to keep him occupied while she made breakfast.

The panic and anxiety of the night before had given way to numbness; Bella felt like a walking zombie, just going through the motions. She pushed James from her thoughts, knowing that the only way she would be able to hold herself together was to concentrate on the task at hand, to keep herself busy. She felt so much like that cowering girl she'd been in Florida, weak and unsure.

As she stood near the stove waiting for her pan to heat up, Bella heard keys jingling in the door. Seth came stumbling into the kitchen a few moments later, slumping into one of the bar stools at the counter. Bella turned to give him a small smile and then resumed her cooking, grabbing more bread to coat in milk, egg, and cinnamon; Seth could eat more than her and Edward combined.

"Is Edward here?" Seth asked. Bella didn't turn to face him, just simply nodded her head. "Did you guys get in a fight or something?" he continued, lowering his voice conspiratorially.

"What? No," Bella replied, finally turning to scowl at Seth. "Why would you think that?"

"No offense, sis, but you look like shit."

Bella sighed loudly and turned her head, unable to look Seth in the eyes. "I don't want to talk about it right now." She concentrated on the pieces of French toast that were sizzling away, squeezing her eyes shut to keep more tears from falling.

Edward came in a few moments later, nodding to Seth before turning his attention to Bella, noticing her drooping shoulders. He placed his hand on the small of her back and kissed her temple. Bella immediately slumped against him, resting her head on his chest.

"Here, give me this," he said, pulling the spatula from her hand. "Why don't you go sit down and I'll finish this."

"Edward, why aren't you dressed?" Bella said, finally realizing that he was in sweats and a t-shirt. "You have to be at work in less than an hour."

"I already called my dad. I'm taking a few days off."

"Edward," Bella huffed in annoyance. When she looked in his eyes, however, she lost the will to argue, instead wrapping her arms around his waist and burying her face in his chest.

"Just until we figure out what's going on, okay?"

"What exactly is going on?" Seth asked, bursting the bubble Edward and Bella had immersed themselves in.

~ O ~

"I think we should go kick his ass," Seth said, stabbing another bite of French toast with his fork. "Who the hell does this guy think he is, just showing up here out of the blue? I'll bet he's got some sort of disease or something."

"What are you talking about?" Bella asked, unable to follow Seth's train of thought.

"You know, he probably needs a kidney or bone marrow. I don't know. Wouldn't his kid be a match for that shit?"

"Possibly," Edward answered. "But Ben's too young. He wouldn't be able to help him out even if he was a match."

Seth felt protective of Bella and Ben and he wanted to find out why James was in Forks. He suggested that he and Edward go pick up Charlie and then drive around town until they found James. There were only a couple of lodging options and he was sure that if Charlie flashed his badge around, they could easily find out where James was staying.

Edward seemed ready to go along with the plan, but Bella was hesitant. "Maybe we should just wait for a few days, see if he tries anything else." When the two men just gaped and stared at her, she continued. "I just think we should take some more time to think about this before we jump into anything."

Both men reluctantly agreed, but Bella didn't trust them. It would be just like them to go behind her back and try to take care of her problems, as they had done with the Renee situation. She was scared to find out why James needed to speak with her, to find out why he's suddenly taken an interest after more than a year.

~ O ~

After two days without further contact from James, Edward reluctantly returned to work, but only after Bella promised that she wouldn't stay alone, especially not at the house in La Push. Edward suggested she take some time off from work, and while she normally would have argued, the fear of leaving Ben caused her to agree. She trusted Sue and knew that she would never allow anything to happen to her son, but if James did show up again, Bella wanted to be there.

While Edward was at work, Bella stayed at Charlie and Sue's with Ben. Edward picked them up in the evenings after his shift at the clinic was over and they returned to his house for the night. Seth and a couple of his friends were staying at the house in La Push, seemingly just waiting for James to appear once more. Bella feared the fight that might ensue if he did.

Charlie hadn't gone so far as to ask around at the local hotels to see if James had a reservation, not wanting to abuse his position in such a way. He had, however, informed his officers of the situation and urged them to let him know if they spotted James. He was annoyed that Bella and Edward hadn't paid attention to the car he drove or written down the license plate number; he would have been easier to spot that way.

At first, Bella was content to sit and wait, but as time began to pass, she started to grow more impatient. Sitting in the front room at Charlie's house, watching the cars pass by, Bella realized that simply waiting wasn't going to work. Things were going to come crashing down around her no matter when she found out and sitting there, just waiting for the wolf at the door, wasn't helping anyone out.

She felt so much like that cowering, scared girl she'd been in Florida. That girl was afraid to stand up for herself, always trying to please others without taking her own thoughts and feelings into account. Bella hadn't been that girl in a long time, but at the first sign of trouble, she'd faded into the background, allowed others to make decisions for her.

Bella sat there for a long time, trying to gather up the courage she knew she had. She loved that Edward wanted to protect her, to shield her from the bad things in her life, but that didn't mean it was the right thing to do. And just like with Renee, she was being sheltered from James while the men in her life tried to figure out what to do.

Sliding on her shoes, Bella grabbed her keys from the bowl near the door and put on her jacket. She took a deep breath and stood tall, hating what she was about to do. Ben was in the middle of his nap and Sue was watching television. It was her perfect opportunity.

"Hey, Sue," Bella said, stepping into the living room. "Would you mind keeping an eye on Ben for a little while?"

"Sure, but where are you going?"

"Just down to the clinic to talk to Edward and I might swing by the diner to check in with Rosalie, ask about coming back to work. I won't be gone long."

"Be careful," Sue called out as Bella was closing the front door.

~ O ~

There were only a few hotels in Forks and Bella was sure that she'd be able to find James. After checking for him at Forks Motel and the Dew Drop Inn, she pulled into the parking lot at the Pacific Inn. Bella smiled as she saw Ms. Cope standing behind counter, restocking visitor's pamphlets. She was one of Bella's favorite customers at the diner.

"Hi, Ms. Cope," Bella said, alerting the woman to her presence.

Ms. Cope turned around quickly, clutching her hand to her chest. "Oh, Bella, dear, you scared me to death," she said with a small chuckle. "What can I do for you?"

"I'm actually looking for a friend of mine that's in town. We used to go to school together when I lived with my mom. Anyway, I ran into him at the diner, but I misplaced the phone number he gave me, so I was trying to track him down."

Bella was amazed by how easily the lie slid from her lips. Her palms were clammy and her stomach was in knots, but she smiled brightly at Ms. Cope, trying to appear calm and serene.

"What's his name, dear?" the older woman said, pulling on her glasses that were attached to the chain around her neck. Bella stepped closer as she opened the guest log, sitting in on the counter where Bella could also take a look.

"Harris. James Harris."

"Hmmm...well, I don't appear have anyone registered by that name." Seeing Bella's shoulders fall and the defeated look on her face, Ms. Cope continued. "There was a young man about your age that came into town last week, blond hair and the prettiest blue eyes. Let me see.

"Oh yes, here it is. The handwriting is hard to read, but it looks like Harris Jameson. Might that be your friend?"

"Yes, that sounds like him."

~ O ~

Bella walked swiftly towards room 208, not giving herself time to change her mind. With one last deep breath, she raised her hand and rapped on the door. She heard a thump and some noises from inside the room before the door flew open, revealing a shocked James.

Wringing her hands, Bella quickly averted her gaze when she realized James was shirtless, wearing only a pair of wrinkled, torn jeans. He moved back and allowed her to enter, plucking a dirty shirt from the floor and sliding it over his head. Bella noticed the disarray inside the room-the clothes and personal items hastily thrown about, the empty pizza boxes, and the discarded soda cans.

Tentatively, Bella sat on the edge of one of the chairs, her back straight and stiff; she couldn't relax, feeling the awkward tension in the air between them.

"I guess you want to know why I'm here," James said, finally breaking the silence between them. Bella nodded her head and waited for him to continue.

A/N: I know. I know, but I like to keep the chapters close to the same length and their conversation really needs its own chapter. This story is winding down, so updates will no longer be on Wednesdays. Updates should come more quickly as I finish up. Also, I know that some people have had questions about the custody issues in this fic. I have made a post on my blog about it, if you want to know more. collectedmoments(dot)com

Since blossom is nearly complete, I've started writing a new fic, Proxy. It's another AH, ExB story, but very different from this one. I hope you'll check it out. The first chapter is already up. :)