Ok I tried to update fast this time. I also attempted to proof read. Let me know what you all think.
A few days later, Lily woke up early in the morning. She pulled herself off of Gabby's couch and rummaged through her suitcase for something black. The Collins' memorial service was today and Lily wanted to go to pay her respects. Everyone had discouraged her from going, saying that it was too hard to get emotionally invested, but Lily felt like she owed it to the family. So she pulled out a black dress and borrowed a shawl from Gabby's closet. She put on her dark sunglasses and piled her messy tangle of curls on top of her head. One look at herself in the mirror told her she was dressed appropriately for the somber occasion.
When she arrived at the cemetery, people had already started to gather for the ceremony. There were dozens of ministry officials and Lily also noticed that the event was being heavily guarded by Aurors. It was standard practice whenever a large group of important members of the wizarding community came together, because it was a perfect chance for Voldemort and his followers to attack. Lily wondered if James and Sirius were on duty. She looked around, but didn't see them. She did notice the Pruitt brothers and quickly said hello to them. She'd briefly dated Gideon when they were at Hogwarts together. However, James had hexed him so much that he'd decided it wasn't worth it.
As the ceremony started, Lily stood towards the back of the group. She noticed a young woman who was holding the Collins' two children. Her eyes were wet with tears and her face was twisted with sorrow. Several wizards who had worked with Mr. Collins at the Ministry spoke to the group. They praised his work ethic and friendly demeanor and condemned Voldemort and anyone who supported him. They all lamented the frequency with which they had to attend such unhappy events. Lily stood silently, wishing she had done something to protect them. Tears slid down her cheeks as she remembered how frightened they had looked before they died. She should have never let them out of her sight. As the service concluded, Lily paid her last respects and then attempted to make a discreet exit. Before she could, the young woman she had been watching earlier stopped her.
"You're Lily Evans right?" the young woman asked.
Lily reluctantly nodded her head.
"I'm so sorry for your loss," Lily said quietly.
The young woman was fighting back tears. She was barely out of Hogwarts and now she had two young children to look after. Lily smiled at the babies in her arms, who were two young to understand that they were mourning the deaths of their parents.
"I just wanted to say thank you," the girl continued.
Lily was somewhat taken aback. She was expecting anger from the young girl for not protecting her sister and brother-in-law, not gratitude.
"Why?" Lily asked with confusion.
"If you hadn't been there, the children would have been murdered too," the girl said as she clung to the two babies in her arms. "Dumbledore told me everything. I know my sister would be eternally grateful to you for saving her children. They are more important than anything."
Lily didn't know how to respond, but she felt the sense of guilt that had been sitting on her shoulders lighten a little. She did what the parents would have wanted, what any mother would have done. She'd made a choice to go for the children and while the choice was difficult, it the one she had to make.
"I'm just sorry I couldn't do more to save your sister and brother-in-law," Lily said finally.
"Well you can't be in two places at once. You made the right choice," the girl said.
It was blunt statement, but it was the truth, Lily accepted. She'd done everything she could and sometimes that had to be enough. She offered her condolences once again, kissed both babies on the head, and then departed the depressing scene.
She wanted to leave the cemetery as soon as possible, but she had one more stop she needed to make. When she arrived at the gravestones of her parents, she took a seat on the cool wet grass. It had been seven years since she'd been to their graves and she regretted that she hadn't visited them sooner. She still remembered the awful day she'd buried them. It had been raining and the wind whipped at her face relentlessly. The weather was an exact expression of her mood. She'd cried throughout the entire process and had never felt so alone. Her sister, true to form was stoic and instead of shedding a tear, she just gave Lily looks of utter loathing.
The painful memory of their deaths seemed all too fresh to Lily. She ran her fingers through the grass and broke off little pieces to play with.
"I'm sorry," Lily said quietly. "I should have been there to protect you. There isn't a day that goes by where I don't regret what happened," Lily said as tears rolled down her cheeks.
"Everything is so messed up," she continued. "I just wish you were still here. I'd do anything to have you back."
She held herself tightly as she buried her face in her hands. She felt so lost and she didn't know where she belonged anymore. She loved her life in New York, but there was a part of her that would always call England home. As she stared at her parents' headstones, she felt a comforting hand on her shoulder. She turned around and found James. He was holding flowers in his hands.
"What are you doing here?" Lily asked, as James took a seat next to her.
"I come here once a month and put flowers out. I go visit my parents too," James said casually.
Lily was surprised at his thoughtfulness. She should have guessed he'd been coming to visit when she saw the old flowers that were in the vase next to her parents' graves. Her parents had always loved James and couldn't have been happier when they decided to get married. Even when Lily refused to admit she loved James, her mother knew differently. She'd always encouraged her daughter to "give the poor boy a chance."
"Thank you for doing that," Lily said.
She took James' hand and placed hers inside it. He smiled slight as she did this.
"Well I figured since I'm out here anyway, I might as well get two sets of flowers," James said, trying to downplay his actions.
"They loved you, you know. My father always said you were like the son he never had. I'm pretty sure he liked you more than me," Lily said, smiling as she remembered her dad.
James just nodded his head.
"I'll always be grateful to them for including me as part of your family after my parents died," James said.
Lily's mother had made sure that James came to every family dinner and spent every holiday with the Evans clan. She even made sure he had his own stocking for Christmas. There'd been a time when they were a happy family.
They sat in silence, both remembering how happy they used to be. Lily let tears roll down her cheeks freely. The lump in her throat tightened as she thought about her beautiful vibrant mother and her strong athletic father lying in the ground beneath them, dead.
"If only we'd been there. I'll never forgive myself," Lily said quietly.
Everything had happened so fast. During the party, James had enticed Lily to sneak off for a minute alone, so they could celebrate in private. He'd wanted to give her a wedding present. He gave her a beautiful necklace with a silver lily as a pendant. But their private moment was interrupted when they heard screams coming from the party. They rushed downstairs and outside into the garden, but by the time they got there it was too late. Lily's parents were dead and Voldemort was waiting for them. After a furious battle, Lily was left unconscious and spent a week in the hospital. When she woke up, Dumbledore told her what had happened. Voldemort killed her parents because they wouldn't give up her and James' whereabouts.
"At some point Lils you have to forgive yourself," James said.
Lily pulled her hand away from his and stared at him hard.
"Just like you did," Lily said accusingly.
James was taken aback.
"They loved you like a son and after they were gone, you didn't bat an eyelash," Lily continued.
James stood up at this point and threw the flowers on the ground.
"I didn't let my sorrow consume me like you do, if that's what you mean," James said.
"No you were content to go on an Auror mission the day after we buried them," Lily replied angrily.
She'd never been able to forgive James leaving her alone after the funeral. She'd never felt such a profound sense of loneliness. At this point James walked up to her and grabbed her.
"You walk around as if you are the only one who has lost people you love to him. He killed my parents too you know, and I watched him do it, unable to do anything about it" James roared.
Lily began to sob.
"My parents were innocent. They weren't a part of this world. They did nothing to deserve the fate they got," Lily cried.
"And I suppose mine did? They were just asking to be murdered," James seethed. "Why don't you just come out and say it. You blame me for their deaths."
It was the fight that they had never been able to have when they were married and it was the wedge that ultimately split them apart. Finally, Lily was ready to say what she needed to.
"If you hadn't made me leave the party, we could have saved them," she cried.
Her whole body was now racked with sobs. James wanted to be angry with her for being so foolish, but he couldn't. He just wanted to comfort her and he did just that. He pulled her to him and held her in his arms.
"If we had been there, we'd be dead now too," James said. "We'd be buried here instead of your parents."
Lily knew that it was the truth. Her parents had sacrificed themselves so Lily and James could live. It was the ultimate act of love, giving their lives so Lily and James could have theirs. She just desperately wished she hadn't put her parents in that position. She'd exposed them to her world and the dangers that came with it. In the end, they died because of who she was.
"They wouldn't have wanted that Lily. They wanted you to live," James said quietly as he stroked her red hair, that was now cascading down her back.
Lily clung to him, hating that he was the only one who understood her, the only one who could make her truly happy. She looked up at him, her eyes still filled with tears. And then she did what she had been fighting against since she had arrived back in England. She kissed him. She pulled his face towards hers and put her lips on his. She'd forgotten how nice it felt to kiss him. It was a slow tender kiss that was full of passion as they explored what they had been missing for the past seven years. Lily ran her hands through James' un-kept hair as she tried to pull him closer to her. The taste of her drove James wild. He'd been waiting seven years for this moment and he decided it had been worth it.
"What a disgusting display," a dark voice said.
Lily and James broke apart immediately and pulled their wands out. Voldemort, with two of his most trusted followers, Lucius Malfoy and Rodolphus Lestrange, were standing in front of them. Lily and James looked at each other and James saw the fear in Lily's eyes.
"So you've finally decided to come after us yourself have you, Lord Voldemort," James spat.
"You dare to address me boy," Voldemort cackled.
He immediately shot a jet of purple light at James, who fell to the ground writhing in pain. Lily immediately dropped to her knees beside him. She watched as his eyes rolled into the back of his head. Infuriated, she stood up and approached Voldemort and his followers.
"Why?" she shouted.
A twisted smile formed on Voldemort's skull like face. His eyes were two small slits, giving him a reptilian appearance. He hissed at her.
"Because I can," he replied.
"I won't let you take anything else from me," Lily screamed.
She pulled out her wand and shot a curse at the most feared dark wizard of her time. It hit him, but it appeared that no damage was inflicted. He just laughed at her feeble attempts to defeat him.
"You'll have to do better than that," Voldemort sneered, and with a flick of his wand, Lily was lying unconscious on the ground.
"Kill them master, they have been a thorn in our side for too long," Lucius recommended.
Voldemort turned and looked at Lucius, obviously displeased that he had offered an opinion when he hadn't been asked for one in the first place.
"When I want your advice Lucius, I will ask for it. Otherwise, do shut up," Voldemort replied.
"These two are too valuable to just dispose of. No, I think we should get some information from them first," Voldemort decided.
Both Lucius and Rodolphus looked at each other and smiled. Lucius was particularly skilled in the art of torture. He was unrelenting in his practices.
"Master, you are so wise," Lucius said.
"Don't speak again Lucius or I won't let you torture the mudblood," Voldemort warned.
Lily could hear them speaking, but she couldn't open her eyes, let alone move. Her head throbbed and it felt like it was about to split open.
"Rodolphus, try and be of some use and round up our two love birds so we can take them somewhere a bit more secluded," Voldemort ordered.
"Enervate," Rodolphus said, and suddenly both Lily and James were awake.
Rodolphus kicked James in the head and promised he would kill Lily in front of him if he tried anything stupid. He confiscated both of their wands before he wrapped ropes around their wrists. He returned to his Master and handed him the wands, hoping for praise.
"Adequate job Rodulphus," Voldemort said mildly.
Lily and James were standing next to each other vigorously trying to remove themselves from the ropes so they could have a better chance at fighting back. They looked over at each other every once in while, to see if either of them had come up with a brilliant plan for escape. Lily sorted through her memory, trying to remember what had worked in the past.
"Little Ealing?" she whispered quietly, referring to a time they had been outnumbered 12 to two in the small town.
"A little difficult to pull off without any large boulders around," James whispered back.
Lily just nodded her head. They didn't have much time and were going to have to think of something quick. The Death Eaters and Voldemort approached them and shouted at them to start walking toward a wooded area over the hill from where they were standing. As they started to walk, James began fidgeting furiously with something in his pocket. Immediately, Lily knew what he was doing. Suddenly he turned and looked at her.
"Run," he hissed.
She looked at him in disbelief. She wasn't going to leave him alone. She just shook her head.
"I'm not kidding Lily get the hell out of here," James pressed.
"No, I'm not running," Lily replied resolutely.
James had to get her out of here. He was about to do something extremely stupid and dangerous and he couldn't have her around in case something happened.
"Please Lily, just listen to me," James tried again.
She just shook her head.
"I'm not leaving," Lily said as she shook her head
With that, she whipped around to face Voldemort and the Death Eaters.
"I've had about enough of this," she shouted.
What happened next could only be described as unbelievable. Without using her wand, Lily created a protective force field around herself and James and then reached in her pocket, where she pulled out a spare wand she had been hiding. She shot jets of green light at Voldemort, Lucius, and Rodolphus. They were all struck down to the ground, even Voldemort.
Then she looked at James who was staring at her in disbelief.
"Now we can run," she said.
And they took off as fast as they could.
"I'll ask how you did that later," James said as they sprinted towards the trees.
Lily just smiled. They were almost to the forest, when Lily felt a hot searing pain in her back. She screamed for James and then dropped to the ground. James turned around to make sure she was still with him and she wasn't. He saw her collapse and then he saw Voldemort come over the top of the hill.