Chapter 9 Sweet Memories

Thomas stood in the yard smoking. It was after midnight and most of the servants had gone to bed ages ago. He'd sat up reading his paper as one by one they'd wandered off, the Bates' heading off home to their cottage, Mr Carson had retired to his office and even Freddie had gone up, but not before telling him he expected a full report in the morning before he left. That was well over an hour ago but Thomas still remained downstairs. Every time he made up his mind to go and talk to Jimmy he remembered the footman's face when he'd caught them in the wine cellar. Thomas hadn't had a chance to speak to him since then, so he had no idea what sort of reception he would receive when he did. Would he be angry? Upset? Disgusted?

Jealous?

Even as he thought it Thomas brushed the notion aside. He still couldn't, wouldn't, let himself think that way. Not until Jimmy told him himself would Thomas believe it was true. Despite this he could feel his lips curl up into a smile as he allowed the fantasy to briefly take over. He would go upstairs knock on Jimmy's door, the footman would promptly kiss him, tell him he loved him and they would have fantastic sex on Jimmy's single bed and live happily ever after. Thomas chuckled to himself.

"Oh Mr Barrow, I didn't realise you were still up".

Mrs Hughes spoke from the doorway smiling kindly at the under butler.

"You're in luck, I was just about to lock up I thought everyone was in bed".

"I should be heading up as well" Thomas replied smiling heading towards the door.

"Well off you go then it will be an early start tomorrow with the Cartwrights' departure. I expect you'll be sorry to see Mr Reid go?"

Thomas started, first Mrs Patmore and now Mrs Hughes? He seriously needed to reassess his ability to be discreet.

"Well don't let me keep you" said Mrs Hughes smiling to herself and making a shooing gesture to Thomas who glanced back nervously at the housekeeper as he began climbing the stairs.

"Oh and Thomas?" Thomas turned around surprised to hear her use his first name.

"Yes Mrs Hughes?"

"I do hope your better mood continues even after Mr Reid has left. It's a welcome change to see you happy".

Thomas was at a loss for words and so he gave Mrs Hughes a brief nod before scurrying up the stairs hoping she would be the last person to comment on his love life.

As he made his way down the corridor to his room he hesitated outside Jimmy's door. He pulled out his pocket watch and checked the time. It was half twelve, surely Jimmy was asleep? He gave the door a tentative knock. When Jimmy didn't answer he turned to walk away when suddenly he heard a whisper from the footman's bedroom.

"Thomas".

Had he not been standing outside the door Thomas wouldn't have heard it. He knocked softly once more not wanting the other servants to wake up.

"Jimmy?" Thomas whispered as he placed his hand on the door knob unsure whether to enter or not.

"Thomas" he heard again "Come in".

Thomas turned the door knob and opened the door "Jimmy I just wanted to check if you were…?"

Thomas froze in shock at the sight before him as he stared open mouthed at the scene before him.

…..

Several hours earlier.

Jimmy and Freddie were sprinting across the grounds of Downton Abbey as they heard the dressing gong ring. Jimmy knew Mr Carson would be furious. He would probably demote him and make Alfred first footman. The thought made Jimmy's blood boil and he sprinted faster feeling his face flushing with the exertion. The pair were just approaching the entrance to the servants' hall when they almost ran straight into Mrs Hughes who was glaring at them with her arms folded.

"And where have you been?" she asked crossly.

"I'm so sorry Mrs Hughes" panted Freddie somehow still managing to sound charming despite his laboured breathing.

"You see James was rather unwell and I had to stay behind to help him out".

James flushed hotly embarrassed and annoyed that he was being sidled with the blame, though technically Freddie was telling the truth.

Mrs Hughes turned her attention to Jimmy. "Well you do looked rather flushed James" said Mrs Hughes not without some level of concern.

"I'm afraid he's been sick Mrs Hughes, that's why we were delayed, he wanted to get cleaned up."

"You better go up to bed so then James. We can't have you vomiting in the dining hall."

"Yes Mrs Hughes" replied James relieved that he wasn't in trouble. "But what about Mr Carson?" he asked worriedly. He wouldn't be surprised if the butler were to demote him anyway even if he were suffering from plague.

"You leave Mr Carson to me" said Mrs Hughes smiling slightly "But you Mr Reid had best get a move on."

"Right away Mr Hughes" Freddie swiftly walked away but not before giving Jimmy a wink as he ducked into the servants' hall.

"Go and get some rest James, I'll send up some soup for you later if your stomach has settled."

"Thank you Mrs Hughes" said Jimmy hoping his gratitude showed.

Mrs Hughes just smiled at him kindly before returning to the servants' hall. Jimmy mean while crept up to bed thankfully without meeting anyone along the way.

…..

After Jimmy had washed and eaten his tea he lay on his bed for hours trying to sleep but no matter how much he tossed and turned sleep wouldn't come. His mind raced as he thought back to his talk with Freddie. He thought about how Freddie had implied that Jimmy was like him and Thomas. But he couldn't be that sort, could he? He'd never thought of it before. Surely if he liked men he would know it by now. But even as he tried to deny it his mind drew up past memories of his time working for Lady Anstruther.

He knew the dowager was pretty and that she favoured him. He loved the attention she gave him and he knew the other male servants were incredibly jealous which only made it sweeter. But he'd never thought of her as anything more than his employer, though she'd certainly hinted that she had wanted him to view her as more than that. She used to have him accompany her on walks through the gardens on the estate. He would carry her sun umbrella while she would flirt shamelessly with him. But while she would talk his mind would stray and he would often stare at the gardeners working.

There was one in particular who always caught Jimmy's eye. He was as handsome as Jimmy and had he been working as a servant inside the house Jimmy knew he would have been filled with jealousy. But as he only ever worked in the gardens Jimmy could ignore his competitiveness, and even grew to admire and appreciate the beauty of the young man. They never spoke but Jimmy would look forward to those dreadfully dull walks just to catch a glimpse of him. Once when he was walking Lady Anstruther past where the man was digging a new flower bed she stopped to admire the roses which had just begun to bloom. The gardener paused and glanced up at Jimmy smirking, as though he and Jimmy were sharing some kind of joke. As Lady Anstruther had reached for Jimmy's arm the gardener quickly returned to his work as though nothing had happened. Jimmy had felt his heart rate increase and he could feel himself getting hard. He told himself it was a reaction to Lady Anstruther's touch and not the silent exchange with the gardener, but now he couldn't deny the fact he had been attracted to the man. It was the same feeling he felt when he thought of Thomas.

His mind returned to what he had witnessed earlier that day in the cellar. Without taking time to think about what he was about to do too much, Jimmy closed his eyes as he drew up the image of Thomas and Freddie together. His hand reached down as he began to stroke himself at the memory. He felt his breathing quicken as he matched his strokes with Thomas's imagined thrusts. He tried to imagine himself in Freddie's position, how it would feel to have Thomas inside him.

Jimmy opened his eyes and stood up pulling off his pyjama bottoms and tossing them on the floor. He lay back down on the bed and spread his legs pulling his knees apart while keeping his feet flat on the bed. He slid his hand down over his stomach passed his hard cock down to his opening. Using a finger he pushed gently. He met with some resistance and so withdrew his finger and began to suck on it, letting his saliva coat in generously. When he was satisfied it was well lubricated he brought his finger once more to his opening. This time his finger slid in with more ease and Jimmy groaned in ecstasy at the sensation. He added another finger and felt his hips buck at the painful yet not at all unpleasant addition. He continued to work his fingers in and out while his other hand resumed stroking his cock.

He imagined his fingers were Thomas's. That Thomas was here with him, pleasuring him. He became so involved in this fantasy that he didn't hear a knock at his door.

"Oh Thomas!" he groaned increasing the pace of his fingers.

He could feel himself getting close and thrust his hips upwards squeezing his eyes shut in anticipation.

"Oh God Thomas! I'm coming!"

He gasped as he felt himself come all over himself. Not even caring about trying to minimise the mess on the bed sheets. He sighed blissfully and opened his eyes to see none other than Thomas staring at him from the door way with a look of shock on his face.