44. Every Bird Must Someday Die
They carried the dead bodies in coffins draped with red, white, and blue. Streams of people and horse-drawn carriages came down the concrete path between the sage green plots of earth. Bordering the path like bricks were lines of weeping faces and stone-faced citizens. Behind them, white stone edifices stuck out of the ground like fallen teeth from the sky.
We stood atop a hill where the plots in the ground of the memorial cemetery were awaiting the newcomers to the flock of the deceased. Our bodies formed a line, tall and proud. And yet, humbly silent and sad.
Our costumes were replaced with appropriately black attire. Robin and Speedy looked identical in their trim, dark suits. Eyemasks hung sleepily under black, spikey hair and short red hair. Beast Boy stood next in line, wearing dark brown. He could never be one hundred percent dark. Raven was next in a jet black pantsuit that looked modest on her. She seemed like some foreign ghost outside of the trademark robe which she had graciously rejected for the occasion. Cyborg made an effort to salvage one of his few sets of clothing: a large dark suit that made his bulky frame look even bulkier. He towered like a giant, black mountain that succinctly summed up the solemnity of the scene at hand. Next was Starfire, dressed in a modest blouse and long skirt of solid black. Her usually fiery hair was up in a bun, stale and lifeless. I was at the end of the line facing the funeral. I had less-stylish shades on over my black eyes and my black hair hung behind my suit in a ponytail.
I took a deep breath and watched—silently like the rest—as the deceased victims of Viper's rampage were laid to rest under the honorable watch of the City. Commissioner Decker was there, standing by most of his number one officers in the force. I could also spot the mayor, the district attorney, the family of Judge Carson, managers of the Prison, and various other high people in the local system.
The group of people who had arrived were enormous. Most were quiet and emotionless. A few were weeping.
As sickening as it sounds, I was happy to see them. For when I saw them, I did not for once detect an ounce of hatred or dislike for us Titans. Nobody seemingly blamed us for the deaths that occurred during our hunt for Viper. Viper was the murderer after all, and it was morbidly comforting to know that people understood that we did our best…and that we were suffering as much as they were to see the aftermath of the assassin's ruthless murders.
At some point, clouds overhead drizzled rightfully so. There was a twenty-one gun salute and a few eulogies read over the miserable precipitation. Robin himself read off a speech the whole of the Titans had written, and the mayor gave a lasting word.
And everyone parted ways….sighing….
Wounded.
-T-T-T-T-T-T-
Raven, Cyborg, Beast Boy, Starfire and I stood and sat at a couple of benches in the middle of a garden at the summit of the cemetery. Half of the funeral crowd had left already, and we in our dark clothes stood around and kicked at the ground silently while we waited for Robin to return from something.
"They said that when they found the bodies in the prison….," Cyborg spoke solemnly, "…they were all congealed together. Viper had been malicious enough to not only chop their hands off and kill them, but he also somehow used his sword to….I dunno…..mush all their flesh together so that it was next to impossible to discern whose body was whose."
"Horrid….," Starfire hugged herself and stared at the ground. "Absolutely horrid…."
"Carson and Georgeton….," Cyborg went on, "….nobody knows where their skin went. Almost all that was left of them were a few bloody limbs and blood. Lots and lots of blood."
Beast Boy took a deep sigh.
Raven was silent.
"I've seen a lot of bad stuff in my days…," Cyborg went on. "My mother, no less, perished before my eyes." A pause. "To this day…I cannot begin to grasp the terrible reality of murder. I mean….to have your life taken away from you. And it's the only life you have. The only life you're ever gonna have. And somebody robs it of you. I mean…how can that be? One minute, you're awake. The next, everything's dark. Everything's dark forever. There's no waking up. There's no seeing light. There's no feeling warmth. There's no feeling anything. There's no nothing…for all is nothing. And to have that be so because some maniac chose to steal the one existence that is existence from you."
"It is so very selfish….," Starfire added. "So very despicable. I weep inwardly for these people laid to rest today."
Beast Boy hugged himself and looked off towards a drizzled wind of gray.
I leaned against a bench, staring off at the rows of white gravestones amidst the waving grass. The landscapers had been late in their job that week. That, or a lot of summer rain recently had forced the vegetation to grow.
Death breeds on life? Or life breeds on life? Or life breeds on death?
I took off my shades, squinted my black eyes, rubbed my eyelids, and put the shades back on.
I sighed.
The grass continued dancing against the graves. The blades tracing the faded names of faded years of faded lives.
Life and death commingling…a paradox of reality……reality and paradox. Reality exists because of paradox and paradox is defined by reality.
I bit my lip.
What use will all of this thinking be when I'm dead myself?
A drop of meek rain or two struck the head of a gravestone and trickled down, refracting letters of a love one's last words or something.
Something for nothing……
"Sometimes I come to this cemetery when there's nobody for the Titans to fight," Raven droned.
Starfire looked over. She had let loose her hair and it was waving like a windsock in the wind. "Why's that, Raven?"
"Why would I not venture into a cemetery?" Raven remarked. "Cemeteries are as much a part of us as schools and hospitals. It symbolizes a piece of the linear path of humankind. The birth, the growth, the struggle, the end. I come here oftentimes to remind myself that I should be aware that one day I will no longer be. To think otherwise is to deceive myself and my soul."
"Or maybe it's just because you're gothic…," Beast Boy mumbled.
Raven glared. "Will you—please—stop calling me gothic. Just because I have the good sense to grasp my own mortality doesn't mean—"
"Will you just drop it?!" Beast Boy snapped.
Cyborg put a hand on the changeling's shoulder.
The elf looked away.
Raven stared. She looked off towards the graves.
So did Starfire.
Everyone was silent.
-T-T-T-T-T-T-
"You sure you have to go so soon?" Robin asked.
He stood a block or two away from the cemetery. Along a boatyard that led—via canal—into the Bay.
Off the side of a wooden dock, Speedy stood on the deck of his speedboat and managed a smile.
"Yeah, man. I'd say my….'visit' here in your City is done. The Green Arrow is a super badass, but he still needs me."
The gray sky's wind kicked at Robin's messy hair. He adjusted his suit, sighed, and then smirked. "You were priceless, Speedy. I'm not just saying that to be nice. I truly don't think we would have done away with Viper without you."
"And I know it," Speedy winked. He gripped the railing of the boat as it started to bob up and down a little in the wind-kicked waves by the dock. "But seriously, Robin. You have a wonderful family here. If someone was to ask me if I was crazy enough to bunk in with an egotistical kung fu student, a cybernetic ass kicker, a green skinned jokester, a clumsy alien, a mute samurai, and a moody sorceress…..I'd be stupid enough to say 'yeah, I'd love to'."
Robin chuckled, "The invitation is open anytime, Speedy. You know it."
Speedy blinked under his eyemask. "I'm surprised you're still inviting people, Robin."
Robin looked down into the waters. "Yeah….well….we may be wounded. But we're smarter now. More mature." He looked back up at Speedy. "And…to be honest….we make wiser choices."
Speedy nodded. "I'll take that as a compliment."
"Don't stress it," Robin pointed. "I'm still the reigning champion in sparring!"
"Pfft! In your dreams, Hamlet!"
"Heheheheh…."
"Heheheheh…….."
Silence.
Speedy looked off towards the coastal cemetery. Towards the distant, five Titans. He motioned with his head.
"See if you can make them chuckle before everything is said and done with, man," Speedy said. "Make the whole City laugh too. We all need it."
Robin spoke: "I'll see what I can do."
Speedy waved, jumped into the cockpit, and closed the cabin door.
The boat's engines warbled, and Speedy's craft puttered away towards the Bay.
Robin watched in the wind.
He sighed.
"May we all die laughing…….."
-T-T-T-T-T-T-
It was raining by the time I returned to the Tower.
I loosened my collar and pulled the tie off. My shoulders were wet with raindrops as I rode the elevator up to the Main Room and tried to relax my stiff limbs.
I sighed and reached back, undoing my ponytail so that my black hair hung loosely.
And yet—after loosening both my hair and collar—I felt no more free. My bones ached with a pain I couldn't put my finger on. It was a gray day with gray faces and gray clouds and gray graves. Each shudder of my limb ached into me and forced the meat of my innards to rumble with the rise and fall of my sighs.
My body is a prison……
SCHLUNK!!
The doors to the Main Room opened.
Starfire and Cyborg were there. Neither had changed out of their funeral attire either. The huge windows of the floor shone through gray-blue light as rain streamed down the glass and filtered the already dismal light of the dying evening.
I exhaled and made a straight line for the kitchen, praying to God I'd find something…..juicy.
"Where're the others?" Starfire asked.
I thought she was speaking to me. I simply shrugged without looking.
Cyborg answered: "Raven's in her room. Robin's….making a transmission or something. Beast Boy still hasn't come back."
Starfire looked out the window…at the rain. She blinked. "Do you think he is allright?"
"Pfft…if he gets wet, he can turn into a seal or something," Cyborg shrugged. He sat down and perused through the TV Guide. He couldn't touch the remote for some reason. "I'm sure he'll be fine."
Starfire stared continuously out the window. Her hands were folded over her skirted lap. She breathed gently…a fair silhouette against the trailing rainwater.
"He is….much younger than the rest of us, is he not?"
Cyborg sighed. "Yeah, Star. B.B.'s a littl'un. And I don't mean just literally. He's got….his own issues."
"An orphan, right?" Starfire looked his way.
"Yeah, that's part of it."
I gave up on the fridge when I couldn't find something to drink. I walked over towards the middle of the Main Room, stalled….stalled….and stalled.
My mind was a complete blank. My fingers dangled anxiously by my side. My feet wanted to move, but didn't. The world outside was so gray. The water trailing….trailing….
Cyborg glanced my way once, then returned to the T.V. guide.
The Tamaranian kept staring out the windows.
I stood there for a good long minute, succumbed, and slumped over in a sofa. Sitting still. Thinking….or was I not thinking?
Silence.
Starfire was about to say something. But she stopped with her mouth closed and drifted back towards the windows.
More silence. More rain. More grayness.
'So this is life…', I mouthed.
Nobody read me.
"Heh…," Cyborg randomly huffed.
"Hmm?" Starfire glanced his way.
"'Contact' is on tonight," Cyborg said. "That's a good film."
"Meeting aliens, right?" Starfire remarked.
"………..," Cyborg blinked. "Never mind."
Starfire almost had a smile. She looked out the window. Beast Boy had his face frantically placed against the glass.
"Eeep! He is here!" she rushed over in her dark dress and swung the wet-heavy window open with her heavy limbs. Wind and mist howled its gray way in as Beast Boy—dripping—snaked onto the floor with a small, wilted object bundled in his arms.
"Guys! Guys!! Help me!!" he panted, panicky.
"What is it?!" Starfire asked, concerned.
Cyborg stood up.
Beast Boy gasped for breath. His shoulders heaved. His eyes were wide. "I-I found him on the way to the Tower! He looks badly hurt!!"
He held his hands over.
I craned my neck to see.
"Why….th-the poor thing!" Starfire gasped at the sight of a twitching, injured bird in the changeling's palms. It was a cardinal. Its wings had been pressed by the rain and were molting. Its eye aimed at the ceiling was half open. Its left leg—bent awkwardly—moved back and forth in a sickeningly smooth motion of repetition.
"I don't think he's gonna make it!!" Beast Boy gasped.
Cyborg walked over. "Hmmmm….where'd you find him?"
"By the side of a road!! He was almost drowning in a puddle in some gutter!" Beast Boy said. He swallowed and looked with bulging eyes at Cyborg. "We gotta get him to a vet!! Now!"
Cyborg glanced at me. He awkwardly scratched the back of his neck. "Um…B.B. He's really hurt bad. A-And the vets are almost closed so—"
"Not yet, they aren't!!" Beast Boy snapped. "Come on, Cy!! You can drive!! Please! You gotta take us to a vet!!"
"It might die!!" Starfire added.
I glanced back at Cyborg.
The Android moaned, sighed, and nodded. "Allright, B.B. G et a towel and a box to put the bird in. You can't just cradle the poor guy all the way there."
"Th-That means we're going?!"
"Yeah. I"ll meet you at the T-Car!"
"I'll h-help!" Starfire stammered and left with him towards the elevator.
Cyborg grabbed a soda from the fridge and walked after them.
He passed by me, stopped, and turned around. "Gonna keep watch over the fort?"
I shrugged.
"Yeah….my thoughts exactly," he turned around and took the stairs.
I was left in the gray streaks of light.
I took a long, deep breath.
Eventually, I sauntered over towards the other side of the room.
I closed the window that Starfire had opened and Beast Boy had flown through.
There was a cold puddle formed in the carpet beneath my shoes.
I ignored it for the time being…
-T-T-T-T-T-T-
Robin sat in front of a monitor in his room.
He typed away at a phone pad.
The screen blipped to life.
A static, live feed displayed a computer station with a deep, dark cave stretching beyond.
A dark figure sat at the station. Two cold eyes pivoted towards the camera.
Robin took a deep breath.
"………………I was not expecting a transmission…"
"I know," Robin replied to the figure in the feed. "This is impromptu."
"Has something come up? An emergency?"
Robin slowly shook his head. "Then what is it you need?"
Robin slowly leaned his chin on his hand at the side of his seat.
"………………Robin?"
"Just wanted to say 'hey', Bruce."
"You know it worries me when you call me that from there," the figure's 'eyes' narrowed. "One of your friends may be listening."
"Not just friends," Robin muttered firmly. "Teammates."
"……………," the figure stared. "……I heard of your recent adventures." A pause. "I am proud of you."
Robin took a deep breath. "Look, Bruce, I didn't call so that you could—"
"The Justice League is even proud. I'd expect a message from them within the next few days, commending you and requesting a---"
"Listen…just….," Robin raised a hand, stopped in mid speech, and then sighed.
"What is it?"
Robin managed a weak smile. "How…..h-how're you doing, Bruce?"
"What type of a question is that?"
"One that I would like you to answer," Robin said. He tried to fight off the shakiness in his voice when he added: "P-Please. For me…."
-T-T-T-T-T-T-
XRaverGreen:Boo.
SpSquirrel: It's you.
XRaverGreen: Well, I would hope so.
SpSquirrel: May I ask you something?
XRaverGreen: You may try :P
SpSquirrel: Who are you?
XRaverGreen: Try something less forward.
SpSquirrel: Allright. How are you?
XRaverGreen; I am alive. And you?
SpSquirrel: More or less.
XRaverGreen: Bad day?
SpSquirrel: There's no such thing as a bad day. Only bad moods.
XRaverGreen: Anything I can do?
SpSquirrel: I can't imagine demanding you to do more than you have.
XRaverGreen: Oh come now. Don't be meek. You're sickeningly nice as it is.
SpSquirrel: It's my habit. My friends deserve it.
XRaverGreen: So your friends 'deserve you', eh?
SpSquirrel: That's not what I said.
XRaverGreen: Oh, of course not. You're too meek.
SpSquirrel: ….
XRaverGreen: Oh lighten up. Go climb a tree or something. Life's too short to be confused.
SpSquirrel: You're right about one thing.
XRaverGreen: You know, I saw you at the funeral.
SpSquirrel: You were there?
XRaverGreen: Who wasn't? I'll have you know, the people think highly of you.
SpSquirrel: Thanks.
XRaverGreen: Thank yourself. It's a hero's prerogative to accept an admiring, thankful populace.
SpSquirrel: And you would know this how….?
XRaverGreen: I don't. That's one reason I envy you, Noir.
SpSquirrel: And is that why you're always helping me?
XRaverGreen: ……..
SpSquirrel: Messenger??
XRaverGreen: You're almost as perceptive as I am, man.
SpSquirrel: Explain.
XRaverGreen: Unlikely. I g2g.
SpSquirrel: Really now…
XRaverGreen: Noir??
SpSquirrel: Yo.
XRaverGreen: Try to smile. In days to come, you'll need it.
SpSquirrel: When you put it that way, it almost makes it hard to.
-XRaverGreen Has Signed off-
SpSquirrel: …….
-Nobody hears you-
SpSquirrel: Oh go to Hell.
-T-T-T-T-T-T-
An hour and a half later, the elevator doors opened.
I turned away from the computer.
Raven glanced up from reading her book.
Cyborg, Starfire, and Beast Boy drifted in. Their faces were numb.
Beast Boy cradled a shoebox with a washcloth. He walked over and placed it ontop of the table and sat at the sofa in front of it…staring sadly into the contents.
Starfire sat down beside him and placed a gentle hand on his depressed frame.
Cyborg walked over towards me.
Raven returned to her book.
"The little thing won't make it….," the android said quietly, below a whisper. He sat down across from me beside me and stretched back in his sofa. It was raining less now. A touch of increasing moonlight glinted off his titanium shoulders that poked up out of the black suit he still wore. "The vet took a good look over it before closing the doors to the office. One wing is broken and the opposite leg shattered. It must have been a truck or car that the cardinal hit. When Beast Boy found it, it must have been lying down on the asphalt for a long time. The soaking rain didn't help either. The thing's terminal as all get out."
A pause.
Only the sound of Beast Boy shuffling in his seat. Eyeing the dying bird.
"Beast Boy….ya know….realizes this," Cyborg gestured. "He won't talk much about it. No use forcing it out of him. Starfire's being and friend and all but I…..," he sighed. "I've seen it all before."
I gestured: 'You already said that once today.'
"So what if I have??" he glared at me.
I looked to the floor, sorry.
Cyborg bit his lip and looked off through the windows.
Silence.
"What needs to be done….," Raven droned from her book. "…is separate him from the creature. Or else he's gonna cry us a river."
"The kid's gotta learn, Rae," Cyborg said.
"Learn what, exactly?" Raven glanced over.
"Shhh!" Starfire frowned.
The three of us winced. Cyborg and Raven didn't realize how loud their voices had become.
Beast Boy heard everything.
Starfire returned to rubbing the boy's back.
"It didn't do anything mean to anyone….," Beast Boy swallowed and whimpered. "It's just a poor little bird. So beautiful. Feathers and all. Why does it have to be hurt?"
"I wish I knew, Beast Boy…," Starfire spoke to him. "Cars on your planet are most destructive things indeed---"
Beast Boy interrupted: "I feel so bad. How many times have I been a bird or a falcon in the line of work?? I sure as heck was never hit by a car and left to die on the roadside in the rain!!" He slumped down and stared inside the shoebox. "It's just not…..fair….."
"Life isn't fair…," Raven muttered. "Deal with it."
Starfire glared in her direction.
"Show some support, for crying out loud….," Cyborg mumbled.
"Support for what?" Raven glanced up. "A dying bird? Have anyone here not heard of the circle of life? An organism lives out its days. It spreads its genes. Then, upon the appointed day, it ceases to exist. It falls to the earth and feeds the ground. Death feeds life and life feeds more life which feeds more death and the cycle is born. There can be no time without the dynamic repetition of destruction and construction. Face it. Every bird must someday die."
"Is that what we are then?!" Beast Boy retorted. "Organisms?! You make it sound so cold, Raven! So hopeless and bleak!"
"That's because it is," she put down the book and emphasized. "One night you'll wake up in bed and realize it."
"Like you did?" Cyborg smirked.
Raven glared. "It's a fascinating thing to sit up in the middle of the night and see death staring straight at you. Everything around you is dark. There's nowhere to hide. And the thing you want to hide away from is truth. The truth is that one day you'll lie your head down to sleep and never wake up. All you'll ever see is blackness. Infinite cold. Absolute zero. It's the final curtain that waits for each and every one of us at the end of the show. There's nothing we can do to change it, nothing we can do to evade it, and nothing we can do to ignore it." She glanced at Cyborg as she said, "In the end…life itself is the ultimate murderer."
Cyborg raised a hand to argue…but he faltered with his mouth hanging open. He looked aside.
I swallowed and leaned forward on numb knees.
Beast Boy sighed. He stared at the box.
"On my planet….," Starfire began, "….we have a Festival of Death."
Cyborg looked at her strange. "Who are you and what have you done to Starfire?"
She smirked slightly, but then returned to solemnity as she said: "I am serious. Our culture is one built around joy. Joy is what permeates life and gives us the ability to fly…to shine…to perform righteous acts of bravery. But with joy comes sorrow. For breath and blood is limited. When all of it runs out—in whatever glorious energy used to spend it—there is a time when all must cease. Many Tamaranians believe in the Final Nebula…where all souls will congregate on the eve of the Great Collection. I will not go into too much details about the….Faith of our culture. But with or without a belief in the Great Nebula, we make sure that our families are what we hang onto till the very end. Families and friends. They complete us. They make us feel fit and whole for passing." A pause. "I apologize, I must be rambling."
"No….it's okay, Star," Cyborg waved. "We all are…..when it comes to death, we're all rambling."
"Yes, indeed," Starfire nodded listlessly. Yeah……
Silence.
"He's suffering…..," Beast Boy stared at the shoebox. "He's going to die….and he's suffering straight through. One would think death would be a….gentler thing."
"It rarely is….," Raven said, reading her book again. "It would be wise simply to do it the favor and finish it off."
Starfire gasped.
"Rae!" Cyborg stood up. "That was uncalled for!"
"Keep things in perspective….," she mumbled.
"Don't think being all moody and dark is any excuse to just treat a living thing with such disrespect!!" Cyborg said loudly.
Beast Boy shook.
"Okay….so maybe life just simply sucks for you and all of us!!" Cyborg went on, towering over the dark girl. "God knows I've had my share!! I don't think any of you could even call me technically alive!!" He jammed a finger at his chest. "This body's comprised of eighty percent circuitry!! You hear that?! Eighty percent!! Nobody can detect a pulse inside of me because it's been replaced with damn wires and motherboards!! I'm not even sure how all of me ticks! Where the blood goes! If there's even much blood left!! I'm practically dead each time my power runs out, which means each and every day I'm no more than a walking corpse with scant flesh hanging off my shell!! Don't think you or me or any other person in this room can talk so flippantly about death when death serves no definition to our mortal eyes!!"
THWAP!!
Raven slammed her book close.
Her eyes shot daggers as she stood up and stared the towering Cyborg down.
"It must be so comfortable to be you. To know pain only by what you see and speculate. Haven't you given a thought to the fact that—for some people—there is a fate worse than death waiting for them?!" She took a bold step forward and nearly snarled as she said: "Believe me when I tell you this. Whatever end I may face, if indeed it will be death—I am sure that I'll be in the condition at the time to gladly accept it with every single fiber of my being!!"
Raven's hair lifted a bit. The lights flickered and the table upon which the shoebox rested shook, causing Beast Boy to gasp and grab the bird. I squinted through my shades and—for a split second—I almost swore I saw a flash of four red specks in Raven's blue eyes.
"Raven….," Starfire insisted softly. "Your emotions…."
Raven's hair lowered. Her eyes rounded. She took deep breath and looked forlornly towards the floor.
Cyborg was quiet.
"I'm out of here….," the dark girl mumbled. She stormed out of the room and into the elevator right as Robin stepped out. The Boy Wonder watched—curiously—as she descended out of view. He looked back at the rest of us tiredly.
"Heh….," Cyborg sighed and rubbed the human half of his skull. "Guess more than one of us in here has to mature…"
"What's going on?" Robin asked, stepping forward. "You all look like someone's dying!"
I bit my lip.
Cyborg cleared his throat.
Starfire pointed at Beast Boy and the shoebox.
Robin produced a silent 'Oh' and shuffled over to the seat that Raven had been occupying.
Silence.
"I……I-I don't want to die….," Beast Boy sniffled. "Am I alone, guys? I-I don't want to f-fall asleep some day and never wake up. It's horrible. It's absolutely horrible." He rubbed a moist eye and shuddered. "I'm….so scared. So very scared…."
"We all are….from time to time, Beast Boy," Starfire said and offered him a hug which he gladly accepted. "Raven is right….to a degree. It has plagued me in the middle of my sleep as well. It increases the more I grow up. Undoubtedly, it will happen to you as well. It may be of no consolation, but you are not alone."
"Alone…..," Beast Boy sniffed. "That's what we'll all be. Alone. When we're all dead. Lonely souls in infinite darkness."
"I believe differently," Cyborg said.
Robin glanced at him. "Are you religious, Cyborg?"
"How can I not be?"
I smiled slightly.
"How about you, Noir?"
I didn't get a chance to answer---
"Why would a God or gods make us so that we can die?!" Beast Boy remarked. "And don't say it's to 'teach us a lesson' or 'glorify Him' or some crap like that!!"
"Maybe there's no God," Robin shrugged. "But if that's true….things would be twice as lonely."
"I know….," Beast Boy nodded. He rubbed his eye again and sniffled. "It's just so…..so unfair….."
"Perhaps it is….," Robin nodded. "But I know something that's more unfair."
"What is that, Robin?" Starfire looked over, her green eyes blinking softly.
"I can imagine living a life till I'm dead," Robin said. "But I couldn't—no matter what—imagine living a life without friends like you."
Beast Boy looked up, tears forming.
"I may be alone after my life is over…," Robin said. "But I sure as Hell don't want to be alone before." He glanced up through a rounded eye-mask. "I am willing to face whatever end I have…whatever fate may take my life…whatever dark abyss plans to swallow me up. I am willing to face all of that….secure in the knowledge that each and every one of you—Raven included—is there to see me off. As far as I'm concerned, my life will be complete with everyone I know by my side. Holding me as I go. Smiling or crying. Warm or cold. Happy or sad. Just as long as they're all with me. Just as long as they're thinking about me, and as long as I'm thinking of them up until the final snuffing of life's candle. That's all I'd need."
Everyone nodded.
The room turned silent and would remain so towards the better part of the evening.
I stood up on weary legs, saluted everyone, and was the first to retire.
-T-T-T-T-T-T-
Raven sat in front of a window in her room.
Rain drizzled against the glass.
She hug some flimsy book to her chest…and sighed.
A single tear trailed….which not a living thing saw.
-T-T-T-T-T-T-
I opened the door to my room.
It was pitch black. Not even the lanterns were lit.
I stripped of my suit. I stripped of my shades. After a warm shower, I got into bedclothes.
But I didn't lay my head down to sleep.
I grabbed a tray and placed it on the floor.
I took a candle out from the bedside table and placed it down on the tray.
I lit a match and lit the candle.
A flame danced lonesomely in the infinite dark.
A cold had spread down into the cellar of the Tower from the moist world outside, and the tiny flame warmed me subtly as I sat down—cross legged, and stared at it.
The flickering object stabbed into my eyes. And yet, I kept staring at it. I kept cradling it…like I was incubating an egg. And I did so long into the darkness of the lonely night.
To this day…I do not remember Who outlasted Who.
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Stopping By Woods On A Snowy Evening
Whose woods these are I think
I know.
His house is in the village, though;
He will not see
me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My
little horse must think it's queer
To stop without a farmhouse
near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of
the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if
there's some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep
Of
easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark, and
deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I
sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
Robert Frost